Not As We Planned

Tash Gershfield & Carly Harris

New episodes every Thursday, with exclusive bonus episodes every Monday on Patreon.

Welcome to Not As We Planned, the honest podcast about relationships, dating, marriage, divorce and motherhood, and all the things no one really talks about.

From becoming a mum and navigating divorce, to rebuilding life as a single mum and dating again in your 30s, we’re sharing the real, messy and unexpected sides of it all.

Life doesn’t always go to plan, and neither do relationships. This is a space for open conversations, shared experiences and saying the things most people avoid.

If you have a question or want to share your story, email us at notasweplannedpodcast@gmail.com

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Get our weekly BONUS episode:

https://patreon.com/c/NotAsWePlanned

Follow the Podcast:

@notasweplanned_podcast

Tash:

@tash_blake_ivy

Carly:

@iamcarlyharris

Get the Planner:

https://notasweplanned.shop

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146 episodes
Updated Wednesday
Explicit

Episodes146

Newest first

Oct 8, 2025 · 55 min
Legally Nik: Answering Your Questions About Coparenting, Dealing With Narcissist's & A 50/50 Split | Not As We Planned Podcast
A very eye-opening episode which will give you an insightful understanding into the coparenting world, how to manage the legal battle with your children’s parent and growing through the trauma. Watch the podcast on YouTube Get a weekly BONUS episode on Patreon: Join Our Community Instagram TikTok Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Oct 1, 2025 · 44 min
Sending A Nude Into The School Group Chat!!! | Not As We Planned Podcast
We share the most embarrassing moments when you text the wrong person, Tash shares a mortifying experience, finding out you're the home wrecker only after the relationship ends and when your husband leaves you for a man Watch the podcast on YouTube Get a weekly BONUS episode on Patreon: Join Our Community Instagram TikTok Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Sep 24, 2025 · 40 min
I Got Eaten Alive!! The Dating Episode You Don't Want To Miss! | Not As We Planned Podcast
We get an update on Carly's dating drama after being ghosted, how she joined dating app Wisp https://wisp.global/ (ad) which bans ghosters, the most graphic sexual encounter by a male listener, the 5ft7 liar, and dating a criminal! Watch the podcast on YouTube Get a weekly BONUS episode on Patreon: Join Our Community Instagram TikTok Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Sep 17, 2025 · 42 min
Should You Date Multiple Men At The Same Time?? | Not As We Planned Podcast
We discuss whether it’s a good idea to date multiple men at once, swapping stories with the other woman, planning another baby with your ex and how to meet the love of your life and a lovely email to give is all hope! Watch the podcast on YouTube Get a weekly BONUS episode on Patreon: Join Our Community Instagram TikTok Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Sep 11, 2025 · 42 min
The hack to find deleted messages on your phone!!! | Not As We Planned Podcast
Carly gives us a big life update, we have a little scroll on ‘are we dating the same guy’, realising you’ve outgrown your partner and don’t know if you should end it, and should you give your cheating partner one more chance? Watch the podcast on YouTube Get a weekly BONUS episode on Patreon: Join Our Community Instagram TikTok Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Sep 3, 2025 · 42 min
We’re Back in Our BRAND NEW Studio! Breakups, Divorce & Dating Real Talk | Not As We Planned Podcast
Welcome to a brand-new era of Not As We Planned - and our very first episode in the NEW studio! 💖 It’s a total pinch-me moment, and we’re so excited to share it with you. Same raw honesty and bestie vibes, but with a fresh new space and energy. In this opener, we dive deep into the realities of love, heartbreak, and fresh starts. You’ll hear the jaw-dropping story of a woman who stayed in a toxic relationship for 30 years before finally breaking free, an empowering reminder that it’s never too late to put yourself first. We also answer listener questions about cheating, red flags, and “should I have stayed?” moments. Plus, catch up with us as we share the highs and lows of single life, dating apps, co-parenting, and everything in between. If you’re ready for real talk, belly laughs, and conversations that feel like therapy with your best friends, you’re in the right place. 👉 Don’t forget to subscribe for weekly episodes from our new studio! #newstudio #podcastseasonpremiere #toxicrelationships #divorcerecovery #singlewomen #datingafterdivorce #relationshipredflags #breakupadvice #selflovejourney #empowermentpodcast #podcast #youtubepodcast #womensupportwomen Watch the podcast on YouTube Get a weekly BONUS episode on Patreon: Join Our Community Instagram TikTok Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Jul 30, 2025 · 49 min
100. Unfortunately Men Like This Exist…
We discuss the difficulties of splitting your time with the kids over the holidays, someone who needs some serious tough love from us, a clear comparison with how your life could look when leaving or staying and the man who was sleeping with 9 women!!! Link to our shop - www.notasweplanned.shop Producer: @TristanHehir City Lights by Ghostrifter Official | https://soundcloud.com/ghostrifter-officialMusic promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.comCreative Commons / Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported (CC BY-ND 3.0)https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nd/3.0/ Watch the podcast on YouTube Get a weekly BONUS episode on Patreon: Join Our Community Instagram TikTok Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Jul 23, 2025 · 49 min
99. He Did Cheat.. But it Was My Fault
We have an honest conversation about the financial pressures of being a single mum, when you catfish your partner by pretending to be the other woman, and a hard story of emotional abuse whilst managing to break the trauma bond Link to our shop - www.notasweplanned.shop Producer: @TristanHehir City Lights by Ghostrifter Official | https://soundcloud.com/ghostrifter-officialMusic promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.comCreative Commons / Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported (CC BY-ND 3.0)https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nd/3.0/ Watch the podcast on YouTube Get a weekly BONUS episode on Patreon: Join Our Community Instagram TikTok Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Jul 16, 2025 · 37 min
98. I Was The Other Woman But Didn’t Know!!!
Mr British airways by who took so many women for a ride, when the man you’ve been dating lied about EVERYTHING… even his name! And when you compare notes with the other woman to find that he shat on both your beds!! Link to our shop - www.notasweplanned.shop Producer: @TristanHehir City Lights by Ghostrifter Official | https://soundcloud.com/ghostrifter-officialMusic promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.comCreative Commons / Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported (CC BY-ND 3.0)https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nd/3.0/ Watch the podcast on YouTube Get a weekly BONUS episode on Patreon: Join Our Community Instagram TikTok Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Jul 9, 2025 · 42 min
97. He Told Me He Was a Vampire
You guys share your most embarrassing date scenarios, when your partner informs you that he wants to watch you sleep with other men, when his memory of you is taken away and a thanks for the podcast making you not feel alone through your divorce. Link to our shop - www.notasweplanned.shop Producer: @TristanHehir City Lights by Ghostrifter Official | https://soundcloud.com/ghostrifter-officialMusic promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.comCreative Commons / Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported (CC BY-ND 3.0)https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nd/3.0/ Watch the podcast on YouTube Get a weekly BONUS episode on Patreon: Join Our Community Instagram TikTok Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Jul 2, 2025 · 45 min
96. An Unexpected Turn of Events
We hear from an absolute queen showing just how to handle being cheated on, when you think you’re over your husband but don’t want to leave because of the kids and an unexpected turn of events when we get told off by a listener…. Link to our shop - www.notasweplanned.shop Producer: @TristanHehir City Lights by Ghostrifter Official | https://soundcloud.com/ghostrifter-officialMusic promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.comCreative Commons / Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported (CC BY-ND 3.0)https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nd/3.0/ Watch the podcast on YouTube Get a weekly BONUS episode on Patreon: Join Our Community Instagram TikTok Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Jun 25, 2025 · 44 min
95. The Signs Of An Affair
When you hear from the other woman who tells you all about the affair, a man who needs our help, and yet another affair with you guessed it… ANOTHER ONE Link to our shop - www.notasweplanned.shop Producer: @TristanHehir City Lights by Ghostrifter Official | https://soundcloud.com/ghostrifter-officialMusic promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.comCreative Commons / Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported (CC BY-ND 3.0)https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nd/3.0/ Watch the podcast on YouTube Get a weekly BONUS episode on Patreon: Join Our Community Instagram TikTok Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Jun 18, 2025 · 48 min
94. A Massive Orange Dildo
When your boyfriend has an issue with your baby daddy, an update from a man whose wife cheated, the massive orange dildo, and proof that no consequences means no changes Link to our shop - www.notasweplanned.shop Producer: @TristanHehir City Lights by Ghostrifter Official | https://soundcloud.com/ghostrifter-officialMusic promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.comCreative Commons / Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported (CC BY-ND 3.0)https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nd/3.0/ Watch the podcast on YouTube Get a weekly BONUS episode on Patreon: Join Our Community Instagram TikTok Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Jun 11, 2025 · 41 min
93. I Thought He Would Change For Me
When a short situationship does a lot of damage, your partner tells you it’s you or the dog, and when your ex has moved on but you weren’t ready for this change Link to our shop - www.notasweplanned.shop Producer: @TristanHehir City Lights by Ghostrifter Official | https://soundcloud.com/ghostrifter-officialMusic promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.comCreative Commons / Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported (CC BY-ND 3.0)https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nd/3.0/ Watch the podcast on YouTube Get a weekly BONUS episode on Patreon: Join Our Community Instagram TikTok Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Jun 4, 2025 · 39 min
92. Describe Your Ex As a Brand
We share the hilarious comparisons of brands that remind you of your ex, if it’s too early to date an old flame straight after a separation, and watching your partner VANISH out of nowhere!!! Link to our shop - www.notasweplanned.shop Producer: @TristanHehir City Lights by Ghostrifter Official | https://soundcloud.com/ghostrifter-officialMusic promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.comCreative Commons / Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported (CC BY-ND 3.0)https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nd/3.0/ Watch the podcast on YouTube Get a weekly BONUS episode on Patreon: Join Our Community Instagram TikTok Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
May 29, 2025 · 42 min
91. She’d Flirt With a Pint Of Milk
We hear from a woman who’s tried everything to make her marriage work, a man who’s wife cheated on him with her best female friend and an update from the woman who was comparing herself to the girl her partner cheated on her with. Link to our shop - www.notasweplanned.shop Producer: @TristanHehir City Lights by Ghostrifter Official | https://soundcloud.com/ghostrifter-officialMusic promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.comCreative Commons / Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported (CC BY-ND 3.0)https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nd/3.0/ Watch the podcast on YouTube Get a weekly BONUS episode on Patreon: Join Our Community Instagram TikTok Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
May 22, 2025 · 45 min
90. You Hooked Up With a Murderer
It’s time for an overdue dating episode and you’ve delivered the goods!! The 15 minute date with a drunk, when your situationship prioritises spiders over you, having sex in his single bed and we share some weird prompts on the dating apps Link to our shop - www.notasweplanned.shop Producer: @TristanHehir City Lights by Ghostrifter Official | https://soundcloud.com/ghostrifter-officialMusic promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.comCreative Commons / Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported (CC BY-ND 3.0)https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nd/3.0/ Watch the podcast on YouTube Get a weekly BONUS episode on Patreon: Join Our Community Instagram TikTok Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
May 15, 2025 · 41 min
89. It’s Giving… Love Bomb
We share a story from a girl who tash met, when you realise you are with a serial cheater and the confessions of a micro penis Link to our shop - www.notasweplanned.shop Producer: @TristanHehir City Lights by Ghostrifter Official | https://soundcloud.com/ghostrifter-officialMusic promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.comCreative Commons / Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported (CC BY-ND 3.0)https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nd/3.0/ Watch the podcast on YouTube Get a weekly BONUS episode on Patreon: Join Our Community Instagram TikTok Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
May 8, 2025 · 42 min
88. I Tried To Tame a F*** Boy
We speak about being married to an addict and how that can impact your life, when blaming the other woman won’t make your problems go away and realising he’s not going to change!! Link to our shop - www.notasweplanned.shop Producer: @TristanHehir City Lights by Ghostrifter Official | https://soundcloud.com/ghostrifter-officialMusic promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.comCreative Commons / Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported (CC BY-ND 3.0)https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nd/3.0/ Watch the podcast on YouTube Get a weekly BONUS episode on Patreon: Join Our Community Instagram TikTok Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
May 1, 2025 · 34 min
87. Comparing Myself To The 'Other Woman'
We both share our realisations from our previous relationships, we give some rare advice and suggest a reconciliation, and the dangers of comparing yourself to the other woman Link to our shop - www.notasweplanned.shop Producer: @TristanHehir City Lights by Ghostrifter Official | https://soundcloud.com/ghostrifter-officialMusic promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.comCreative Commons / Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported (CC BY-ND 3.0)https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nd/3.0/ Watch the podcast on YouTube Get a weekly BONUS episode on Patreon: Join Our Community Instagram TikTok Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.