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St-John On Air

StJohndeGlanville

Neurodiversity, education, meaning of life, happiness and struggles - a personal journey into adulthood. To have the best experience, enjoy in the evening or at night.
If you like what I do, buy me a coffee => https://buymeacoffee.com/fzts9andx

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  • 20 episodes
  • Avg 7 min
  • English
  • S1 · E36
    August 28 · 13 min

    #036 Who Are You When Nobody Is Watching?

    Imagine that nobody would ever know. Nobody would praise you. Nobody would criticise you. Nobody would find out. What would you do differently? In this episode, we explore authenticity, social approval, conformity, and the uncomfortable gap between being a good person and appearing to be one. How much of what we do comes from our genuine values—and how much comes from the desire to be liked, respected, admired, or simply seen in a certain way? Drawing on psychological research and real-life examples, we explore what happens when we remove the audience and ask ourselves a deceptively simple question: Who are you when nobody is watching? Because perhaps our most revealing choices are the ones nobody ever sees.

  • S1 · E35
    August 17 · 11 min

    #035 The Person You Could Have Been

    Have you ever wondered who you might have become if you had made one different choice? If you had taken that job. Stayed in that relationship. Moved to another country. Started the business. Picked up the guitar again. We all carry imaginary versions of ourselves—the people we might have been, the lives we might have lived, and the paths we didn't take. In this reflective episode of StJohn-On-Air, I explore counterfactual thinking, possible selves, nostalgia, and narrative identity to ask a deeper question: What can the person you could have been teach you about the person you still want to become? Drawing on the work of psychologists Neal Roese, Kai Epstude, Hazel Markus, Paula Nurius, Constantine Sedikides, Tim Wildschut, and Dan McAdams, we explore why we imagine alternative lives, when those thoughts can help us learn, and when they can turn into regret and rumination. Because you cannot go back and live the life you didn't choose. But perhaps you can still carry something from it forward. Maybe that imaginary version of you isn't saying: "You should have been me." Maybe they're whispering: "There is still time to become a little more like the person you wanted to be." A quiet episode about regret, possibility, identity, and the lives that exist somewhere between memory and imagination.

  • S1 · E34
    August 9 · 8 min

    #034 You Don't Have to Do It Alone: Understanding Body Doubling for ADHD

    Why can an ADHD child spend twenty minutes trying to begin five minutes of homework… yet start almost immediately when someone quietly sits beside them? In this episode of StJohn-On-Air, we explore the simple but powerful strategy known as body doubling—a technique widely used by people with ADHD to make starting and sustaining tasks feel more manageable. Drawing on the work of Dr. Russell Barkley, Dr. Thomas Brown, Dr. Edward Deci, Dr. Ross Greene, and Dr. Stephen Porges, we discuss: • What body doubling is—and what it isn't • Why getting started can be one of the hardest parts of ADHD • How calm presence can support attention and emotional regulation • Why body doubling is about companionship, not supervision • Practical ways parents, teachers, partners, and friends can use this strategy without creating dependence Whether you're an adult with ADHD, a parent, an educator, or someone who wants to better understand executive functioning, this episode offers practical ideas grounded in compassion and current psychological research. Sometimes we don't need someone to solve the problem. We simply need someone willing to stay beside us while we begin. Good night... and happy listening.

  • S1 · E34
    July 16 · 14 min

    Dogs, Discipline, and the Life They Quietly Give Us | Long Conversations #1 | St-John On-Air

    What does owning a dog really teach us about life? In the first episode of Long Conversations, a new monthly series from St-John On-Air, I step away from the usual research-led format for a more personal and reflective conversation. Drawing on nearly three decades of living with dogs—including my 12-year-old Border Collie, Pepe, my Yakutian Laika, Mara, and the Giant Schnauzer, Bite who shared 17 years of my life—I explore how dogs quietly shape who we become. This isn't an episode about choosing the right breed or dog training techniques. It's about the unexpected lessons dogs teach us about discipline, mental health, emotional regulation, happiness, exercise, routines, resilience, and living in the present. Together, we'll talk about: Why working dogs need both physical and mental stimulation. The hidden benefits of daily dog walks for physical and emotional wellbeing. How dogs help us build healthy habits through routine rather than motivation. The emotional rewards—and real responsibilities—of dog ownership. The challenges of training, veterinary care, ageing, and saying goodbye. What psychologists and researchers have discovered about exercise, stress, loneliness, nature, and human wellbeing. Featuring insights inspired by the work of James Clear, John Cacioppo, Brian Hare, Kelly McGonigal, and Jules Pretty, this episode blends personal storytelling with evidence-based reflections on living a healthier, more intentional life. Whether you're a lifelong dog owner, thinking about welcoming a dog into your family, or simply enjoy thoughtful conversations about personal growth, this episode is for you. St-John On-Air is a podcast exploring mental health, neurodiversity, parenting, psychology, habits, wellbeing, and the everyday experiences that help us better understand ourselves. If this conversation resonates with you, please follow the podcast, leave a rating, and share the episode with someone who might enjoy taking this walk with us.

  • S1 · E33
    July 12 · 8 min

    #033 Understanding Masking

    The Exhaustion Nobody Sees: Understanding Masking in Neurodivergent Lives Why do some autistic people and people with ADHD seem to "hold it together" all day—only to completely fall apart once they get home? In this compassionate episode of StJohn-On-Air, I explore the hidden emotional labour of masking (also known as camouflaging): the effort many neurodivergent people invest in hiding their natural behaviours to fit into a world that often misunderstands them. Drawing on the work of Dr. Laura Hull, Dr. Devon Price, Dr. Damian Milton, Dr. Catherine Crompton, Dr. Tony Attwood, Dr. Luke Beardon, Dr. Daniel Siegel, and Carl Rogers, I discuss: ​What masking really is—and why it develops ​Why many autistic people and people with ADHD mask from childhood ​The emotional cost of constantly "performing" ​Why children often collapse emotionally after school ​How families, teachers, and friends can create spaces where neurodivergent people no longer need to pretend ​ Whether you're neurodivergent yourself, a parent, an educator, or simply someone who wants to understand others more deeply, this episode offers research, reflection, and hope. Because sometimes the greatest gift we can give another person is the freedom to simply be themselves. Good night... and happy listening.

  • S1 · E32
    July 3 · 8 min

    #032 Body Movin'

    Made to Move: Why Exercise Is One of the Greatest Gifts We Can Give Ourselves Why is it so difficult to motivate ourselves to exercise—even when we know it's good for us? In this episode of StJohn-On-Air, I explore what science tells us about movement, motivation, happiness, and healthy ageing. Drawing on the work of evolutionary biologist Dr. Daniel Lieberman, neuroscientist Dr. Wendy Suzuki, psychiatrist Dr. John Ratey, physician Dr. I-Min Lee, exercise scientist Dr. Steven Blair, psychologist Dr. Carol Dweck, behaviour scientist Dr. BJ Fogg, and physician Dr. Peter Attia, we discover why our bodies evolved to conserve energy, how exercise transforms the brain, and why movement may be one of the most powerful investments we can make in our future. In this episode you'll discover: • Why humans didn't evolve to enjoy exercise • How movement improves memory, mood and emotional regulation • Why motivation usually follows action—not the other way around • Practical strategies for making exercise a sustainable habit • Why movement is about freedom, not fitness Whether you're beginning your fitness journey or looking for renewed motivation, this episode offers practical ideas, scientific insight, and a gentle reminder that your body was made to move.

  • S1 · E31
    June 14 · 7 min

    #031 Men's Mental Health

    Why do so many men struggle in silence? In this reflective episode of St-John on Air, we explore the psychological, social, and emotional factors that shape men's mental health and why vulnerability is often more difficult for men than many people realize. Drawing on the work of psychologists and researchers including Ronald Levant, James Gross, John Cacioppo, Thomas Joiner, John Oliffe, Carl Rogers, Robert Waldinger, Martin Seligman, and Kristin Neff, we discuss: • Why many men find it difficult to ask for help • The hidden costs of emotional suppression • Loneliness, connection, and mental well-being • How depression can appear differently in men • What friends, partners, parents, and colleagues can do to help • Why vulnerability is not weakness but courage This episode is for men, for those who care about them, and for anyone who believes that no one should have to carry life's burdens alone. A gentle conversation about strength, honesty, and the power of human connection.

  • S1 · E30
    June 6 · 6 min

    #030 Possessions vs. happiness

    Can possessions make us happy? In this reflective episode of St-John on Air, we explore the fascinating relationship between material possessions, happiness, and lasting well-being. Drawing on the work of psychologists and researchers including Daniel Kahneman, Kent Berridge, Philip Brickman, Thomas Gilovich, Tim Kasser, Martin Seligman, Robert Emmons, and Robert Waldinger, we examine why new purchases often bring excitement at first—but rarely provide lasting fulfilment. Together we'll explore: ✨ The psychology of hedonic adaptation 🧠 Dopamine, anticipation, and reward ❤️ Why relationships matter more than possessions 🌍 Experiences versus material goods 🙏 The role of gratitude in lasting well-being 🌱 What actually contributes to a meaningful life A gentle nighttime reflection on happiness, consumer culture, and the small things that continue to matter long after the excitement of something new has faded. Perfect for listeners interested in psychology, well-being, mindfulness, and personal growth.

  • S1 · E29
    May 16 · 5 min

    #029 Small Joys

    The Quiet Joy of Small Things Why do the smallest moments sometimes stay with us the longest? In this reflective episode, we explore the psychology of savoring, presence, and everyday well-being—and why tiny experiences can have a surprisingly powerful effect on mental health. Drawing on insights from Martin Seligman, Fred Bryant, Barbara Fredrickson, and Rick Hanson, this episode explores: • why the brain naturally overlooks small joys • how savoring improves emotional well-being • why modern life makes presence difficult • and how tiny daily rituals quietly shape happiness Through gentle reflection and practical ideas, discover how slowing down—even briefly—can make life feel fuller, calmer, and more meaningful. Perfect for evening listening, mindfulness, reflection, and anyone longing to reconnect with the beauty of ordinary moments.

  • S1 · E28
    April 25 · 5 min

    #028 Addiction Cycle

    The Pull of More: Understanding Dopamine and Breaking the Cycle of Addiction Why do we keep reaching for “just one more”? In this reflective episode, we explore the psychology and neuroscience behind everyday addictive patterns—scrolling, snacking, checking—and why they can feel so hard to stop. Drawing on insights from Nora Volkow, Kent Berridge, and Anna Lembke, this episode explains: • why dopamine is about wanting, not just pleasure • how habits quietly become compulsions • why modern life makes overconsumption easier than ever • and how to gently interrupt the cycle early Through calm reflection and practical strategies, discover how awareness—not force—is the first step toward real change. Perfect for evening listening, self-reflection, and anyone wanting to regain control of their attention and habits. If you like what I do, buy me a coffee => https://buymeacoffee.com/fzts9andx

  • S1 · E27
    April 19 · 4 min

    #027 Progression and Motivation

    Small Steps, Real Change: Learning to See Your Own Progress Why does progress so often feel invisible—even when we’re doing the work? In this reflective episode, we explore the psychology of motivation and learning, and why growth can be difficult to notice in the moment. Drawing on research from Anders Ericsson, Teresa Amabile, Leon Festinger, and Robert Bjork, this episode explains: • why improvement often feels slow and unclear • how motivation is linked to visible progress • why comparing yourself to others distorts reality • and how small, consistent actions build real change Through personal reflection and practical strategies, this episode invites you to shift your focus—from chasing results to noticing growth. Perfect for learners, students, athletes, and anyone trying to stay motivated on a long journey. If you like what I do, buy me a coffee => https://buymeacoffee.com/fzts9andx

  • S1 · E26
    April 10 · 5 min

    #026 Making Time

    If you like what I do, buy me a coffee => https://buymeacoffee.com/fzts9andx Where Did the Time Go? Slowing Down in a Life That Moves Too Fast Why does time feel like it’s speeding up? Days blur into weeks. Weeks into months. And suddenly, we find ourselves saying: “I don’t have time.” In this reflective episode, we explore the psychology of time perception and why modern life can feel so rushed—even when nothing has changed on the clock. Drawing on insights from Marc Wittmann, David Eagleman, Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, and Daniel Kahneman, this episode explains: • why routine makes time feel shorter • how distraction fragments our experience • why memory shapes how long life feels • and how small choices can make time feel fuller again Through personal reflection and practical ideas, this episode invites you to slow down—not by doing less, but by being more present in what matters. Perfect for quiet evenings, reflection, and anyone feeling like time is slipping away too quickly.

  • S1 · E25
    April 7 · 6 min

    #025 Exam Stress

    Before the Exam: When Pressure Becomes Too Loud The night before an exam can feel strangely quiet—and yet, inside the mind, everything gets louder. Doubt. Pressure. What-ifs. In this reflective episode, we explore the psychology of exam anxiety and why stress sometimes overwhelms even well-prepared students. Drawing on research from Hans Selye, Richard Lazarus, Carol Dweck, and Sian Beilock, this episode explains: • why the brain reacts to exams as a threat • how pressure affects memory and performance • why anxiety can block access to what you already know • and how to stay steady when it matters most Through a real classroom example and gentle, practical strategies, this episode offers a calmer way to approach high-pressure moments. Perfect for students, parents, and teachers navigating exam season. If you like what I do, buy me a coffee => https://buymeacoffee.com/fzts9andx

  • S1 · E23
    March 27 · 2 min

    #024 54321 Exercise

    In this special bonus episode, I slow things down. When your thoughts are racing, your chest feels tight, or the world gets a little too overwhelming — this is your space to pause, breathe, and come back to yourself. Join us as we guide you through the 5-4-3-2-1 grounding technique — a simple but powerful way to reconnect with the present moment using your senses. 5 things you can see 4 things you can feel 3 things you can hear 2 things you can smell 1 thing you can taste Through gentle narration, ambient sound, and a calm rhythm, this episode is designed to help you reset — whether you're in the middle of a busy day or lying awake at night. Take a breath. You're here. You're safe. You've got this. Press play whenever you need to come back to now. If you want, I can make a darker, more cinematic version—or one tailored for kids (which might work really well for your daughter).

  • S1 · E23
    March 27 · 5 min

    #023 Grounding Technique

    When the mind starts to race—replaying the past or worrying about what’s ahead—it can feel impossible to slow it down. In this gentle, nighttime episode, we explore a simple but powerful grounding tool: the 5-4-3-2-1 technique. Drawing on insights from psychologists and researchers such as Ellen Hendriksen, Daniel Siegel, Jon Kabat-Zinn, and Susan David, this episode explains: • why anxious thoughts spiral • how the brain reacts to perceived stress • why sensory awareness helps regulate emotions • and how to gently return to the present moment Through a calm, guided explanation and personal reflection, you’ll learn how to step out of overthinking and reconnect with what is real, steady, and here. Perfect for late evenings, anxious moments, or when your mind simply won’t rest. If you like what I do, buy me a coffee => https://buymeacoffee.com/fzts9andx

  • S1 · E22
    March 13 · 7 min

    #022 Self-Regulation

    Why do emotions sometimes take over before we have time to think? In this reflective episode, we explore the psychology and neuroscience of self-regulation—the ability to pause, understand our emotions, and choose our response rather than reacting impulsively. Drawing on research from psychologists and neuroscientists, including Roy Baumeister, Walter Mischel, Daniel Siegel, Angela Duckworth, Lisa Feldman Barrett, Richard Davidson, and John Gottman, this episode explores: • why emotional reactions happen so quickly • how the brain balances impulse and reflection • why emotional regulation strengthens relationships • and practical ways to build the skill of pausing before reacting Through a personal reflection on frustration, plans that fail, and the role of ego in emotional reactions, this episode invites listeners to see self-regulation not as suppression, but as quiet strength. Perfect for late-night listening and anyone seeking calmer responses in stressful moments. If you like what I do, buy me a coffee => https://buymeacoffee.com/fzts9andx

  • S1 · E21
    March 6 · 7 min

    #021 Under Pressure

    Stress is often seen as negative but biologically, it is part of how our bodies respond to challenges. In this reflective episode, we explore the science of stress and how to manage it more wisely. Drawing on research from Hans Selye, Richard Lazarus, Robert Sapolsky, Kelly McGonigal, Teresa Amabile, and Matthew Walker, the episode explores: • why the brain activates stress responses • how chronic pressure affects sleep, focus, and emotional balance • why interpretation of stress matters • practical strategies to reduce overwhelm• and how support and recovery protect long-term well-being Through the story of an 18-year-old student preparing for IB Diploma exams, this episode reflects on the reality of academic pressure and how small changes in perspective and routine can help restore balance. Perfect for late-night listening, quiet reflection, and anyone feeling the weight of expectations. If you like what I do, buy me a coffee => https://buymeacoffee.com/fzts9andx

  • S1 · E19
    February 27 · 6 min

    #20 Procrastination

    Why do we keep saying, “I’ll do it later”… even when it matters? In this reflective episode, we explore the psychology behind procrastination — and why it’s not a character flaw but an emotion-regulation challenge. Drawing on research from: • Dr. Tim Pychyl on procrastination and emotional avoidance • Dr. George Ainslie on temporal discounting • Dr. Carol Dweck on fear of failure and mindset • Dr. Peter Gollwitzer on implementation intentions • Dr. Albert Bandura on self-efficacy • Dr. Kristin Neff on self-compassion I unpack why the brain prefers short-term relief over long-term progress — and how tiny, compassionate action can break the cycle. If you like what I do, buy me a coffee => https://buymeacoffee.com/fzts9andx

  • S1 · E19
    February 20 · 6 min

    #019 Setting Boundaries

    Where do you end — and someone else begin? In this reflective episode, we explore the psychology of boundaries: why they feel uncomfortable, why we avoid them, and why they are essential for healthy relationships. Drawing on the work of Brené Brown, Henry Cloud, Harriet Lerner, Mary Ainsworth, John Gottman, and Steven Hayes, this episode unpacks: • Why unclear roles create anxiety • How resentment quietly builds • Why secure relationships require clarity • How values — not fear — guide courageous action • And how boundaries strengthen connection rather than weaken it Through a personal story about blurred roles between boss and friend, we examine how calm, clear communication can transform tension into respect. If something in your life feels slightly misaligned — this episode may help you name it.

  • S1 · E18
    February 13 · 5 min

    #018 Being Brave

    Bravery isn’t always loud. Sometimes, it’s quiet. It’s the moment we notice our boundaries being crossed…when fairness, justice, or compassion are at risk…and we choose not to look away. In this episode, I reflect on what it truly means to be brave — not through confrontation, but through values. Drawing on psychological research and a personal conversation with my child, I explore how children learn courage by watching us protect what matters, speak up calmly, and stay faithful to our principles even when it’s uncomfortable. This is an episode about quiet courage, strong boundaries, and the kind of bravery that shapes how our children learn to stand in the world.

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