Back from the Borderline

mollie adler

Back From The Borderline is a podcast about depth psychology, symbolism, spirituality, consciousness, and the search for a more meaningful life.

I started this show years ago while trying to understand my own mind. Somewhere along the way, the questions became much bigger than me. They led into Carl Jung, mythology, Christian mysticism, dreams, tarot, philosophy, esotericism, religious history, artificial intelligence, and the symbolic patterns that quietly shape the way we see ourselves and the world around us.

The word borderline has taken on its own meaning over the years. It speaks to the edge almost all of us eventually reach. That place where our old explanations stop working and we’re asked to learn an entirely different way of seeing. That’s the space my work inhabits.

Some episodes are conversations with researchers, psychologists, philosophers, historians, and spiritual teachers. Others are long-form essays where I follow a question wherever it leads. Lately I’ve been especially interested in symbolic literacy, the way images, myths, dreams, and archetypes quietly organize human life, often long before we’re consciously aware of them.

I’m not very interested in being “certain” about anything. I care about learning to recognize patterns, hold complexity without rushing toward easy conclusions, and recover forms of wisdom that help us live with greater honesty, imagination, and responsibility.

If you’ve found yourself searching for Carl Jung, depth psychology, symbolism, archetypes, spirituality, mythology, Christian mysticism, tarot, dreams, consciousness, philosophy, or the Western esoteric tradition, I think you’ll feel at home here.

Alongside the public podcast, I also host House of Cards, an ongoing study of the Rider-Waite-Smith tarot through psychology, symbolism, mythology, and contemplative practice, as well as MOODS, an app I designed for dreamwork and deep inner inquiry. Both are extensions of the same project: learning to see more clearly.

You can explore everything, including new episodes, House of Cards, Patreon, and MOODS, at backfromtheborderline.com.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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353 episodes
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Episodes353

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Aug 12, 2023 · 34 min
the dystopian "NPC" TikTok trend is melting our brains
I typically refrain from commenting on trending topics, but I found myself unable to resist discussing this particular one. An unusual (to say the least) TikTok trend has emerged, where users live-stream themselves portraying an “NPC”—essentially an automated “non-player character” with pre-written dialogue. This includes uttering nonsensical phrases like “ice cream so good” in response to gifts from their audience. This trend is spreading rapidly and leaving many of us utterly perplexed. NPCs, or “non-player characters,” are common elements within various video games. These characters aren't under the player's control but engage with players through predetermined dialogue to drive the storyline. The mechanical demeanor of these characters has led to comparisons, inspiring the name of the TikTok NPC trend. In this episode, I'll share my perspective on this trend through my personal experiences, having been involved in sex work and online streaming previously. Is this all harmless entertainment, or does it highlight a more significant concern where we willingly commodify ourselves for financial gain? How far will we allow this to go? Join me as I delve into this dystopian scenario. Topics explored and questions answered in this episode: ★ What is an NPC? ★ What is the NPC meme and how and when did it begin trending? ★ What is the NPC trend on TikTok? ★ What is NPC streaming and how much do NPC streamers make? ★ What impact does this robotic trend-following behavior have on us as a collective? ★ Does social media make it easier for us to dehumanize one another? ★ How in the hell do we make our way out of this dystopian nightmare? Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com. The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Aug 8, 2023 · 1 hr 47 min
shame series part 7: unmet childhood needs, perfectionism, and public shaming
Discover the insidious nature of toxic shame and its potential role as the root cause behind our ongoing suffering and emotional turmoil. At the core of self-sabotage, toxic shame leaves us feeling empty, unfulfilled, and disconnected from others. Learn how internalized toxic shame manifests uniquely in individuals, evident through feelings of unworthiness, negative self-talk, perfectionism, fear of vulnerability, struggles with intimacy, boundary challenges, chronic self-consciousness, avoidant behaviors, negative body image, and emotional instability. This episode is the seventh installment of our multi-episode series, aiming to guide you in alchemizing and transmuting your toxic shame. TIME STAMPS: 00:00 – 13:48: The sound of toxic shame (listener voicemails) 13:16 – 42:10: Understanding your core childhood dependency needs (how unmet needs in childhood affect us as adults) 42:10 – 47:54: Abandonment through enmeshment in the overt and covert needs of a dysfunctional family system 47:54 – 59:29: Understanding internalized toxic shame and shame spirals 59:29 – 01:14:20: Toxic shame as forced perfectionism in public school systems 01:14:20 – 01:20:51: How peer shaming in childhood leads to internalized toxic shame 01:20:51 – 01:30:05: The devastating impact of digital public shaming and internet “cancel culture” [PREMIUM] 01:30:05 – 01:36:51: Listener question from Matt (rushing the recovery process) 01:36:51 – 01:51:42: Anonymous listener question (finding self-forgiveness after a shame-inducing mistake) 01:50:47 – 02:02:34: Listener question from Caleb (how to sit with the deep pain of recovery and deal with creative blockages) Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com. The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Aug 1, 2023 · 1 hr 34 min
shame series part 6: toxic shame in the aftermath of sexual and physical abuse
Discover the insidious nature of toxic shame and its potential role as the root cause behind our ongoing suffering and emotional turmoil. At the core of self-sabotage, toxic shame leaves us feeling empty, unfulfilled, and disconnected from others. Learn how internalized toxic shame manifests uniquely in individuals, evident through feelings of unworthiness, negative self-talk, perfectionism, fear of vulnerability, struggles with intimacy, boundary challenges, chronic self-consciousness, avoidant behaviors, negative body image, and emotional instability. This episode is the sixth installment of our multi-episode series, aiming to guide you in alchemizing and transmuting your toxic shame. Join us as we explore how various forms of physical, emotional, and sexual abuse contribute to the development of toxic shame and the initial steps towards healing. Disclaimer: This episode contains discussions and graphic descriptions of sexual assault and abuse. Listener discretion is advised. Check out the time stamps below for a more detailed description of the topics covered in this episode: 00:00 – 04:12: Intro + disclaimer (a brief description of what we’ll be discussing) 04:12 – 11:29: Recognizing the different types of sexual abuse 11:29 – 19:59: Covert (hidden) sexual abuse and trauma 19:59 – 32:25: Emotional-sexual abuse 32:25 – 42:07: Physical abuse and toxic shame 42:07 – 54:17: Emotional abuse and toxic shame 54:01 – 01:00:06: How our emotions become shame-bound 01:00:06 – 01:09:35: The impact toxic shame has on the development of sexuality 01:09:23 – 01:12:44: When shame becomes your “master emotion” PREMIUM PORTION: 01:12:44 – 02:00:03: Toxic shame healing meditation “The Black Bear” [PREMIUM PREVIEW] The Black Bear meditation was inspired by and adapted from an original meditation by Sez Kristiansen. Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com. The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Jul 25, 2023 · 1 hr 36 min
shame series part 5: unraveling the impact of abandonment
What is this sneaky, yet destructive thing called toxic shame, and could it be the root cause of our continued suffering and emotional dysregulation? Toxic shame lies at the heart of most self-sabotaging behaviors that keep us feeling empty, unfulfilled, and disconnected from others. Signs of internalized toxic shame can manifest in various ways and differ from person to person. Persistent feelings of unworthiness, negative self-talk, perfectionism, fear of vulnerability and intimacy, difficulty setting boundaries, chronic self-consciousness, avoidant behaviors, negative body image, and emotional instability can all be indicators of toxic shame. This is part five in a multi-episode series aimed at helping you alchemize and transmute your toxic shame. In this episode, we will explore the devastating impact on our lives when internalized toxic shame becomes our state of being. We will also dive into the different ways abandonment can present in childhood through physical abuse, emotional abandonment, and deprived narcissism. TIME STAMPS: 00:00 – 11:24: Intro + reading of my poem “untethered” (the impact of toxic shame in my own life) 11:24 – 14:53: How toxic shame becomes a permanent state of being 14:53 – 19:35: Understanding the connection between toxic shame and abandonment trauma 19:35 – 36:32: Abandonment as physical absence 36:32 – 01:06:24: Abandonment as emotional neglect and deprived narcissism 01:06:24 – 01:12:57: Abandonment as physical abuse PREMIUM PORTION: In the Premium half of the episode, I discuss my personal healing journey and the positive impact Somatic Experiencing therapy is having on my life. We finish up with a guided pendulation exercise inspired by the work of Peter Levine. 01:12:57 – 01:48:16: How somatic experiencing is helping me get back into my body 01:48:16 – 02:01:50: Guided pendulation exercise inspired by the work of Peter Levine (creator of Somatic Experiencing) Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com. The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Jul 18, 2023 · 1 hr 37 min
shame series part 4: how toxic shame fuels dysfunctional family systems
This is part four of our multi-episode series aimed at helping you alchemize and transmute your toxic shame. In this episode, we’ll dive into the generational aspect of toxic shame and how it gets passed down and embedded into dysfunctional family systems. We’ll also discuss the various roles and rules in shame-based families and the pervasive impact this has on children in adulthood. Check out the time stamps below for a more detailed description of the topics covered in this episode. 00:00 – 05:14: Intro + reflections 05:00 – 18:07: How toxic shame sabotages our most important relationships 18:07 – 33:13: A case study of how toxic shame gets passed down throughout generations 33:13 – 48:54: Exploration of the various dysfunctional family roles and their characteristics 48:54 – 01:09:54: Multi-generational shame cycles (how children develop toxic shame) 01:09:54 – 01:30:53: Dysfunctional rules in shame-based families 01:30:58 – 01:36:57: How to become more fully human with the “five freedoms” of Virginia Satir 01:46:37 – 01:59:46: Guided meditation and affirmation session to transmute toxic shame Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com. The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Jul 11, 2023 · 1 hr 14 min
shame series part 3: toxic shame and 'disordered' or 'dysfunctional' personality traits
This is part THREE in our multi-episode series aimed at helping you alchemize and transmute your toxic shame. First, we confront the detrimental effects of toxic shame, its correlation with personality disorder labels, and its potential role in criminal behavior. We’ll also tackle how unprocessed toxic shame from childhood can manifest as traits of grandiose narcissism, causing individuals to seek validation through exaggerated self-importance. Finally, we’ll discover how the burden of shame can stifle our spiritual growth and impede our quest for self-discovery and our connection with others. Tune in to this captivating episode as we uncover the deep-rooted effects of toxic shame on our psyche and gain insights into how we can heal and reclaim our authentic selves. Check out the time stamps below for a more detailed description of the topics covered in this episode: 00:00 – 07:18: Reflecting on what we’ve learned so far and an introduction to this episode’s topics 07:19 – 19:46: Toxic shame and personality disorder labels 19:38 – 34:41: Toxic shame and guilt in criminal behavior (recidivism prediction) PREMIUM | My Stupid Walk for My Stupid Mental Health – “head-fucked by perfectionism (ft. a very special surprise guest)” 34:37 – 37:00: Toxic shame and sexual abuse (will be expanded upon in a further episode) 37:00 – 45:17: How unprocessed toxic shame from childhood can lead to feelings of grandiosity (grandiose narcissism) 45:17 – 49:25: Toxic shame and spiritual starvation 49:25 – 59:24: The dehumanizing quality of toxic shame 59:00 – end: [PREMIUM PORTION] My Stupid Walk for My Stupid Mental Health – “head-fucked by perfectionism (ft. a surprise appearance by my partner Zaz) Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com. The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Jul 4, 2023 · 1 hr 22 min
shame series part 2: when toxic shame becomes who you are
This is part two in a multi-episode series aimed at helping you alchemize and transmute your toxic shame.What is this sneaky, yet destructive thing called toxic shame, and could it be the root cause of our continued suffering and emotional dysregulation? Toxic shame lies at the heart of most self-sabotaging behaviors that keep us feeling empty, unfulfilled, and disconnected from others. Signs of internalized toxic shame can manifest in various ways and differ from person to person. Persistent feelings of unworthiness, negative self-talk, perfectionism, fear of vulnerability and intimacy, difficulty setting boundaries, chronic self-consciousness, avoidant behaviors, negative body image, and emotional instability can all be indicators of toxic shame. Check out the time stamps below for a more detailed description of the topics covered in this episode: 00:00 – 05:56: Reflections from part one 05:56 – 11:06: Why discuss toxic shame? 11:06 – 16:50: Shame and guilt in neurosis 16:50 – 28:52: How childhood shame shapes adult identity 28:52 – 33:03: Understanding traumatic shame and abandonment 33:03 – 37:47: How toxic shame disconnects and freezes you out from your own needs and desires 37:47 – 46:42: How self-shaming = self-alienation 46:42 – 49:02: Toxic shame as the core of codependency 49:02 – 52:18: Toxic shame as related to BPD or ‘borderline personality disorder’ 52:18 – 59:19: The role of toxic shame in addiction 59:19 – 01:10:11: How are guilt and toxic shame related? PREMIUM | 01:10:19 – 01:37:32: My Stupid Walk for My Stupid Mental Health – “Out of My Head and Into My Body” Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com. The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Jun 27, 2023 · 1 hr 28 min
shame series part 1: healthy shame makes you human
What is this sneaky yet destructive thing called toxic shame, and could it be the root cause of our continued suffering and emotional dysregulation? Toxic shame lies at the heart of most self-sabotaging behaviors that keep us feeling empty, unfulfilled, and disconnected from others. Signs of internalized toxic shame can manifest in various ways and differ from person to person. Persistent feelings of unworthiness, negative self-talk, perfectionism, fear of vulnerability and intimacy, difficulty setting boundaries, chronic self-consciousness, avoidant behaviors, negative body image, and emotional instability can all be indicators of toxic shame. This is part one in a multi-episode series aimed at helping you alchemize and transmute your toxic shame. Check out the time-stamps below for a more detailed description of the topics covered. TIME STAMPS 00:00 – 13:48: How mythical interpretations of journeys “into the underworld” can help us understand the process of alchemizing toxic shame 13:48 – 17:56: Shame as myth and allegory 17:56 – 32:50: How toxic shame impacts our sense of Self 32:50 – 37:23: Can shame be healthy? 37:23 – 49:04: When do we develop a sense of shame in childhood? (Psychosocial stage 2) 49:04 – 52:16: Shame as embarrassment 52:16 – 55:21: Shame as shyness 52:21 – 59:12: Shame and community 59:12 – 01:03:07: Shame as a spark for creativity 01:03:07 – 01:05:31: How shame is viewed from a spiritual perspective 01:05:31 – 01:13:23: What happens if we don’t develop a sense of healthy shame? (Shamelessness and its impact on our lives) 01:13:23 – 01:49:10 – Control as a trauma response (how chronic trauma can lead to controlling or caretaking behaviors) 01:49:10 – 01:56:15: Heart opening + shame reduction mantras / affirmations Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com. The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Jun 20, 2023 · 1 hr 21 min
healing parental wounds through spiritual practice
In this transformative episode, we go beyond understanding the mother and father wounds to explore how we can actually heal from them. With insights from Eastern spirituality and grounded practices, this episode provides a blueprint for addressing the lingering impact of parental wounds, empowering you to cultivate a deeply rooted sense of self, peace, and inner resilience. If you’ve ever wondered how to truly heal from the past and reclaim the parts of yourself that felt lost, this episode is a powerful place to start. We begin with an exploration of "family constellations therapy," unearthing the hidden patterns we inherit and untangling what Eastern philosophy calls samskaras—the karmic knots that keep us bound to past wounds. Episode Highlights: 00:00 – 12:00 | Intro + reflections on mother and father wounds: listener insights and the groundwork for self-healing 14:17 – 21:00 | Family Constellations Therapy: Seeing how ancestral and family patterns influence us in subtle, powerful ways 21:07 – 32:36 | Karmic knots and samskaras: How our emotional pain can transcend generations, and how to begin releasing it 32:26 – 42:55 | Buddhist philosophy and mindfulness as tools for healing parental wounds: slowing down, observing, and finding freedom 42:55 – 50:48 | Making healing a yogic practice: turning inner work into a sacred journey of integration and self-compassion 50:48 – 55:17 | Hidden roadblocks: Misunderstandings that may be keeping you stuck in cycles of self-blame or resentment 55:17 – 59:24 | The Four Core Functions of Parenting: Nurturing, Protection, Empowerment, and Initiation 59:15 – 01:02:07 | Mother and Father as Nurturer: Learning to nurture yourself and provide what was once missing 01:02:07 – 01:07:24 | Mother and Father as Protector: Cultivating a safe, strong inner space where you can truly rest and trust yourself 01:07:24 – 01:17:22 | Mother and Father as Empowerer: Finding strength to claim your voice, pursue your goals, and live authentically 01:17:22 – 01:28:11 | Mother and Father as Initiator: Awakening your sense of purpose and meaning, and moving into a life of self-leadership RECOMMENDED RESOURCES - Connected Fates, Separate Destinies: Using Family Constellations Therapy to Recover from Inherited Stories and Trauma by Marine Sélénée - The Wounded Woman: Healing the Father-Daughter Relationship by Linda Schierse Leonard Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Jun 13, 2023 · 2 hr 22 min
daddy issues: recognizing and healing the father wound
In this deep-dive episode, we unravel the complex and often misunderstood concept of "daddy issues"—a term that has been trivialized and sensationalized in popular culture. But beneath the stereotypes lies a significant psychological impact that can shape a person’s life in profound ways. Whether we label it as the "father wound" or simply recognize it as the lingering effects of a strained or absent father figure, these unresolved issues can ripple into our adult relationships, self-worth, and emotional resilience. Together, we explore the father wound beyond the clichés, examining how it manifests in both men and women, its roots in societal expectations, and its distinct differences from the mother wound. From "father hunger" and feelings of abandonment to the ways cultural stereotypes keep men and women alike stuck in cycles of pain, this episode offers both insight and practical guidance on how to start the healing journey. Through storytelling, poetry, and guided introspection, this episode provides tools to understand and begin addressing the father wound—an important step towards self-compassion, healthier relationships, and emotional freedom. TIME STAMPS 00:00 – 04:05: Intro + reflections (why explore the father wound?) 04:00 – 17:54: What is the father wound? 17:58 – 21:25: How it feels to struggle with an unhealed father complex (poem snippet by Marcus Lee) 21:25 – 24:10: High-level description of the father wound and how it presents 24:10 – 31:20: Father hunger, father absence, father deficit 31:20 – 43:19: The impact the unhealed father wound has on well-being and relationships and how it contributes to the cycle of abuse 43:19 – 01:00:44: How the father wound manifests in our daily lives as adult children 01:00:44 – 01:08:30: What is the difference between the mother and father wounds? 01:08:30 – 01:11:32: How societal expectations and cultural stereotypes keep men stuck in the father wound 01:11:42 – 01:20:09: Masculine expressions of an unhealed father wound 01:20:09 – 01:34:54: Feminine expressions of an unhealed father wound 01:34:55 – 01:42:47: Is the Industrial Revolution to blame for the father wound? (spoiler alert: it’s complicated) 01:42:47 – 01:48:30: Psychology of the Father Archetype 01:48:30 – 01:55:44: Fathers in mythology and symbolism (exploring our need for heroes and villains) 01:55:44 – Practical suggestions and techniques for father wound healing 02:08:46 –02:17:48: HEALING SEGMENT - Getting into the meditative state 02:17:48 – 02:37:18: Father wound healing visualization exercise (inspired by the work of Virginia Satir) 02:37:18 – 02:52:48: Final reflections, where Mollie is at in her current healing journey, additional thoughts + recommendations regarding the father wound Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com. The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Jun 6, 2023 · 1 hr 34 min
the mother wound: sacred scars as a portal to healing
In this powerful and deeply personal episode, we journey into the raw and often hidden layers of the "Mother Wound." This is more than a psychological concept; it’s an emotional inheritance of unresolved pain, abandonment, and unfulfilled needs that many of us carry from our childhood into adulthood, shaping our relationships, self-worth, and the way we view the world. If you've ever felt that lingering ache from unmet maternal love, or if you’ve struggled to break free from self-sabotaging patterns rooted in early wounds, this episode is for you. Starting with a grounded exploration of the Mother Wound, we look at how these core wounds can manifest, ways to recognize their impact on your daily life, and how to begin the healing journey. We draw on insights from Bethany Webster, philosopher Alan Watts, and ancient myth to illuminate how generational pain influences us and, most importantly, how we can reclaim our wholeness. From guided visualizations and re-parenting exercises to the archetypal power of the Divine Mother, this episode is a space to start releasing what no longer serves you and to reconnect with your authentic self. Time-Stamps and Episode Highlights: Part 1 - What is the Mother Wound? 02:00 – 10:17: Introduction to the Mother Wound 10:23 – 54:49: In-depth exploration of how the Mother Wound manifests in our lives and relationships Part 2 - Healing Through Age Regression and Re-Parenting Tasks 54:51 – 58:40: Preparing for guided healing exercises and visualizations 59:00 – 1:09:20: Meditative connection to the Mother Wound, inspired by the words of Alan Watts 1:09:21 – 1:13:40: Re-parenting practices to nurture your inner child 1:13:45 – 1:29:07: Inner infant age regression: reconnecting to early unmet needs Part 3 - Embracing the Divine Mother in Myth and Mysticism 01:29:13 – 01:33:03: The story of Demeter and Persephone and the archetype of the nurturing mother 01:33:05 – 1:58:08: Healing the Mother Wound through myth, archetypes, and the subconscious: reframing the hero’s journey as a path to self-acceptance and wholeness RESOURCES MENTIONED: ★ https://www.bethanywebster.com/ [download her free mother wound healing pdf] ★Article: “You are more myth than science” by Dr. Mia Hetenyi ★ Book: Homecoming: Reclaiming and Championing Your Inner Child by john bradshaw Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com. The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
May 30, 2023 · 1 hr 36 min
this high school dropout is transforming the failing public school system by following her bliss
In this inspiring episode, we dive into a vision of education that could reshape how future generations learn, connect, and thrive. At just 15, Zelda Poem felt the weight of a system that wasn’t designed to nurture individuality or emotional well-being. She took a courageous step and left school at 16, setting out to revolutionize education. Since then, she’s become a published author, trained in art therapy, empathic communication, and psychology, and advised various EdTech initiatives. Her current project, “Tomorrow’s School,” is a collective art gallery dedicated to reimagining education as a supportive, holistic, and personalized experience. Zelda and I explore the deep-rooted issues within today’s public school systems in both the U.S. and Europe, and discuss the kind of paradigm shift needed to create schools that focus on emotional regulation, creative exploration, and individual growth. We touch on how AI might play a role in this transformation, offering tailored learning experiences and enhanced support for students, while also weighing its potential risks. Key Topics and Questions Explored in This Episode: Systemic Issues in Public Education: Analyzing the negative effects of current educational structures on student well-being and learning potential. The Future of Education: Zelda’s insights on creating schools that prioritize community, individualized learning, and emotional support over rote memorization and testing. AI in the Classroom: Discussing how AI can enhance personalized learning, its benefits for educational outcomes, and the limitations of relying solely on technology for teaching. Fostering Creativity and Critical Thinking: Practical strategies for parents and teachers to nurture a child’s natural curiosity, creativity, and resilience in a world that often prioritizes conformity. Supporting Sensitive Students: Guidance on how to help highly sensitive or neurodivergent children navigate traditional school settings and manage the emotional challenges they may face. Zelda’s story is a reminder that true change often begins with a willingness to challenge the status quo. Whether you’re a parent, teacher, student, or lifelong learner, this conversation offers valuable insights on creating educational spaces where every child can feel seen, supported, and inspired to follow their passions. Listen in for a glimpse into what education could look like when we dare to imagine something better. Connect with Zelda: Visit Zelda’s website, where you can read about her work and connect with her on her various social media platforms (click here) Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com. The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
May 23, 2023 · 57 min
finding a sense of self as a trauma-dumping emotional vampire
In this listener Q&A episode, we explore profound and complex themes around self-identity, relationships, forgiveness, and the search for emotional stability. Each listener brings a unique perspective and challenge, from grappling with the Buddhist concept of “no-self” to navigating the difficult terrain of forgiveness and dependency in relationships. Join us as we delve deep into these topics, offering insights that could reshape how you approach your mental health and interpersonal connections. Episode Highlights: Priyasha’s Journey with “No-Self” and Identity (03:34): In Dubai, Priyasha reflects on her struggle to “find a sense of self” as she works through the symptoms of her BPD diagnosis. We explore how Buddhist principles, especially the concept of “anatta” or “no-self,” can provide a path to self-understanding, particularly in the realm of emotion dysregulation and how these ideas have been adapted into DBT. Allison’s Experience of Isolation after Suicide Attempts (25:08): Allison feels like her friends and family are pulling away after her recent suicide attempts, leading her to question the roots of her distress and the concept of emotional boundaries. We dive into topics like emotional vampirism, trauma-dumping, and ways to express vulnerability without overwhelming loved ones. Gia’s Struggle with Forgiveness and Past Trauma (52:17): Gia wrestles with forgiving her childhood caregivers while still feeling triggered by their presence as an adult. We touch on the nature of “magical thinking” in trauma recovery, the pitfalls of “going back to the empty well,” and how to approach forgiveness as a self-healing tool rather than an obligation. Fae’s Conflicted Feelings in Relationships (01:13:26): Fae finds herself developing crushes on friends while in a committed relationship, stirring up feelings of guilt and confusion. We examine the “Favorite Person” phenomenon often discussed in the BPD recovery community, the risks of objectifying others for emotional regulation, and strategies for creating emotional independence and balance in relationships. This episode invites you to rethink how you relate to yourself and others, offering both practical guidance and deep reflection on managing emotional triggers, identity, and the pursuit of genuine self-acceptance. Tune in for an intimate, empathetic exploration of recovery and personal growth. Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com. The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
May 16, 2023 · 58 min
ending your self-destructive patterns of relationship sabotage once and for all
In this episode, we tackle the complexities of emotion dysregulation and its deep-rooted ties to childhood emotional neglect and abuse. Many of us who grew up in chaotic or neglectful environments find ourselves craving love and connection yet struggling to maintain healthy, secure relationships. Through a Q&A format, I respond to listener questions and explore common patterns like overthinking, rumination, and drama addiction that often sabotage our chances for stability and connection. If you’ve ever found yourself caught in a cycle of self-sabotaging behavior, toxic relationships, or unresolved anger, this episode sheds light on why these patterns emerge and offers guidance on how to break free from them. Episode Breakdown and Key Topics: Sophie’s Struggle with Rumination (08:11): We discuss why overthinking can make relationships feel doomed from the start, and how to break the cycle of anxious rumination. Anna’s Question about Leaving an Abusive Partner (16:50): Navigating the emotional turmoil of leaving an abusive relationship, and finding clarity on whether it was the right choice. Lauren’s Awkward Work Relationship Fallout (25:24): Tips for managing the discomfort and emotional fallout when a workplace romance doesn’t go as planned. Marina’s Reflection on “Abandonholics” and Drama Addiction (36:08): An exploration of the addictive nature of chaotic relationships, and why some of us are drawn to emotional highs and lows. Elinor’s Battle with Explosive Rage (01:11:27): Understanding the roots of uncontrollable anger and practical strategies to self-regulate in moments of intense emotion. This episode offers a compassionate look at why we often feel drawn to self-destructive patterns and gives listeners actionable insights to foster healthier, more fulfilling relationships. Tune in to uncover the underlying forces at play and start building a life centered around true connection, rather than chaos. Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com. The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
May 9, 2023 · 59 min
recovering human connection through rupture and repair
In this soul-stirring episode, we dive into the raw, resonant prose of Amanda Palmer’s article, What it feels like to get divorced—and possibly remarried—at TED 2023. This piece, originally shared on her Substack, captured my heart so profoundly that I wanted to read it aloud and share it with you, creating a moment of reflection for anyone struggling with life’s most complicated emotions. So brew a warm cup of tea, settle into your coziest spot, and let me read you some words that might help you feel a little less alone. Through Palmer’s words, we explore themes of heartbreak, transformation, and resilience. She grapples with the disorienting aftermath of her divorce, the weight of parenting through tumultuous times, and the surreal experience of navigating these emotions against the backdrop of a TED conference. Palmer’s reflections on love, loss, identity, and belonging are both intimate and universal—giving voice to the raw edges of human experience. Episode Highlights and Topics Discussed: Divorce and Reinvention: Palmer’s reflections on ending a marriage and the bittersweet hope of starting anew The Crisis of Belonging: Exploring humanity’s collective need for connection in a world increasingly defined by isolation The Power of Pain as a Teacher: Why embracing emotional pain, rather than numbing it, can foster growth and healing Mental Health in a Chaotic World: How Palmer’s honesty about grief, anxiety, and the complexities of parenting offers comfort to those facing similar battles The Fragility and Resilience of the Human Spirit: From ancient wisdom to modern struggles, how the desire for connection and self-acceptance remains timeless TIME STAMPS 00:00 – 01:53: Intro 01:53 – 04:37: Why I chose to read the article on today’s episode / intro of Amanda Palmer and her work 04:37 – 50:06: Storytime reading of “What it feels like to get divorced—and possibly remarried—at TED 2023” by Amanda Palmer 50:06 – 51:26: Article reflections 51:45: Preview of SWSMH 19 BFTB BONUS: SWSMH #19 (preview): seeing the synchronicities: This week’s Stupid Walk is all about listening, but not in the way you’d expect. We’re diving into the concept of synchronicities. In psychology, synchronicity is defined as the occurrence of meaningful coincidences that seem to have no cause. During our walk, I’ll discuss examples of synchronicities in my own life and how they’ve shaped my recovery journey. RESOURCES · “What it feels like to get divorced—and possibly remarried—at TED 2023,” full article by Amanda Palmer · Amanda Palmer’s Substack Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
May 2, 2023 · 1 hr 1 min
fear of abandonment and the mother wound in fairy tales
In this episode, we dive into the lasting emotional impact of childhood abandonment and neglect, a wound that can leave us feeling unworthy and disconnected well into adulthood. Set to calming medieval soundscapes, we explore how myths, fairy tales, and timeless stories hold profound insights for healing these deeply rooted scars. From the iconic tales of Cinderella and Vasilisa the Beautiful to the transformative journeys of heroes and heroines, we’ll examine how fairy tales reveal paths to resilience and self-discovery, even in the face of great loss. The episode also features an excerpt from a powerful book that reframed my own perspectives on resentment and the weight of emotional burdens I’ve carried since childhood. Through these stories, we uncover how feelings of abandonment are universal—and how tales of magical godmothers, brave girls with enchanted dolls, and creatures from nature offer guidance for embracing our inner strength. Together, we’ll unravel how the themes of missing mothers, unfulfilled bonds, and wicked stepmothers symbolize the complex realities of human relationships, teaching us to confront our fears and embrace the parts of ourselves we often neglect. Topics Covered in This Episode: How childhood abandonment impacts emotional well-being across a lifetime The symbolism of missing or absent mothers in folklore and fairy tales The mythological roots of resilience and how stories offer paths to self-worth An exploration of Carl Jung’s “shadow” concept and what fairy tale villains represent TIME STAMPS: 00:00 - 3:56: Intro 3:56 - 50:13: Fear of Abandonment - Mothers in Fairy Tales 50:18: Preview of this week’s Premium Submarine Episode, “SWSMH 18: smash the peace button” RESOURCES: · The Fear of Abandonment: Missing Mothers and Fairy Tales (article by Dale M. Kushner) · The Interpretation of Fairy Tales (C.G. Jung Foundation Books) by Marie Louise Von Frantz · The O Manuscript: The Seer, The Magdalene, The Grail by Lars Muhl Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Apr 25, 2023 · 1 hr 31 min
find your life's purpose with the japanese philosophy of ikigai
Why am I here? What is my true purpose? If you’re feeling lost, stuck in a cycle of unfulfilling work, or questioning if there’s more to life than the 9-to-5 grind and occasional vacation, you’re not alone. Many of us are living on autopilot—choosing careers based on survival rather than passion, trapped by societal expectations, and rarely considering what a life of true purpose might look like. In this episode, we’ll explore the ancient Japanese philosophy of Ikigai, a concept that translates to “reason for being”. Ikigai encourages us to look inward and discover what brings us joy, aligns with our strengths, and allows us to contribute to the world in a meaningful way. This isn’t about quick fixes or surface-level career advice; it’s about peeling back the layers to uncover the unique calling that only you can fulfill. Through this exploration, you’ll discover: How Ikigai can help you define a life purpose that goes beyond the day-to-day grind The core elements of Ikigai and how they interconnect: passion, mission, profession, and vocation Practical steps for aligning your talents, passions, and work with a purpose that resonates on a soul level Ways to break free from society’s expectations and live intentionally How Ikigai bridges personal growth and spiritual meaning, transforming your life from mere survival to deep fulfillment Imagine a life where your actions feel aligned with your values, where your work feels like an extension of your true self, and where every day brings a sense of contribution and joy. Discovering your Ikigai could be the key to that life. Dive in and take the first step toward a deeper, more meaningful existence. Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com. The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Apr 18, 2023 · 1 hr 17 min
deepfakes, revenge porn, and the impact on body autonomy
Deepfakes have become an unsettling phenomenon in recent years, rising from niche technology to a widespread cultural issue that affects millions. While deepfakes hold potential for media and innovation, the darker side of this technology is alarming. AI-powered deepfake porn, specifically targeting women, threatens their sense of self-control, consent, and safety in the digital world. Victims are forced to see their likeness in explicit content they never agreed to, leaving lasting emotional trauma. In January 2023, this issue gained global attention when popular Twitch streamer Brandon “Atrioc” Ewing accidentally revealed that he had viewed and paid for deepfake porn of fellow female creators without their consent. One of those creators, QTCinderella, responded publicly, shedding light on the devastating impact non-consensual deepfake porn can have on victims. This incident triggered national conversations around consent, safety, and the urgent need for legal protections. In this episode, we explore the troubling implications of deepfake technology on privacy and autonomy, using the Atrioc controversy as a case study. From the legal loopholes that make deepfake porn hard to combat to the emotional toll on victims, we’ll delve into how this technology magnifies the sexualization of women, often with no legal recourse or protection. By the end of the episode, you’ll have insight into the evolving digital landscape, the necessity of safeguards, and the steps you can take to protect yourself and loved ones in the face of AI’s rapid advancements. Topics discussed in this episode: The Atrioc deepfake controversy: how it unfolded and its implications What is a deepfake, and how is AI used to create it? Legal and ethical issues surrounding non-consensual deepfake content How deepfake porn escalates the objectification and sexualization of women in disturbing ways Emotional and psychological effects of deepfake revenge porn on victims UNFPA’s “bodyright” campaign and other movements fighting back Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com. The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Apr 11, 2023 · 1 hr 31 min
are you an approval addict?
The need for approval is universal, but when it spirals into a cycle of constant validation-seeking, it can lead to something often called approval addiction. This lesser-known yet impactful form of addiction drives people to go to great lengths to secure affirmation and avoid rejection, often at the cost of their own well-being. In this episode, we explore what approval addiction is, how it manifests in our lives, and the signs that indicate we may be relying too heavily on others’ validation. Learn how approval addiction shows up in daily life, from over-committing and people-pleasing to compromising your values for the sake of fitting in. We’ll also cover the different types of approval addiction, such as social approval and performance-based validation, and examine the differences between approval addiction and codependency. Finally, we’ll discuss how to break free from the need for constant validation, so you can build a stronger sense of self-approval and authentic confidence. Whether you struggle with people-pleasing, fear of rejection, or a need for external validation, this episode offers practical insights to help you start reclaiming your sense of worth from within. Topics Discussed in This Episode: Signs of approval addiction and how to recognize it The role of people-pleasing and validation-seeking in approval addiction Differences between codependency and approval addiction How to break free from needing external approval for self-worth Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com. The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Apr 4, 2023 · 1 hr 18 min
completely transform the way you view your mental health symptoms with this reframe
When psychological suffering enters our lives, the modern psychiatric response is often to label, diagnose, and medicate what’s perceived as “symptoms” of conditions like BPD, EUPD, cPTSD, ADHD, ASD, and countless others. The DSM-5, as of 2022, lists criteria for 193 mental health disorders—a number that seems to expand with every edition. This episode challenges Western psychiatry's tendency to pathologize and medicalize human emotional distress, exploring what might happen if we viewed our symptoms not as problems to be "fixed," but as adaptive responses that reveal unmet needs and deeper truths about ourselves. Imagine seeing these intense emotions and behaviors not as signs of a “disorder,” but as messengers pointing us toward growth and self-discovery. I share my own experience of hitting rock bottom, questioning life’s purpose, and how this perspective shift led to a profound change in how I approach mental health. Together, we’ll explore why reframing symptoms as “saviors” could radically change how we view mental well-being, reduce stigma, and transform treatment approaches for the better. This episode offers a perspective that invites compassion, self-awareness, and integration—helping us move towards a world where our daily emotional experiences are embraced as parts of a greater whole.. RESOURCES AND ADDITIONAL CONTENT MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: ■ From Disorder to Design: A New Way to Understand Mental Health Symptoms (Ft. Philosopher Justin Garson) ■ Mental Health Symptoms or Hidden Spiritual Gifts? (Ft. Lisa Miller) Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com. Disclaimer: The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.