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ADHD Mums

Jane McFadden

Being a mum is hard enough. Being a mum with ADHD — or raising neurodivergent kids — is a whole different level.

ADHD Mums is the unfiltered, science-meets-reality podcast hosted by Jane McFadden — an Autistic and ADHD mum with a Master's in Neuroscience and Psychology and certification as an ADHD and Autism assessor. This isn't another polished parenting show with 'ten easy tips'. It's real stories, confessions we're not supposed to say out loud, and the research that explains why so many of us are running on empty.

Every week you'll hear:
🎙️ Confessions — raw, anonymous truths from mums navigating rage, burnout, and survival.
🧠 Expert insights — from clinicians, researchers, and policy leaders on ADHD, autism, and mental health.
💬 Advocacy in action — exposing ADHD medication shortages, NDIS red tape, and the hidden costs mothers carry.

With over 1 million downloads from around the world, the podcast has influenced ADHD reforms in Australia, been featured in national media, and pushed politicians to answer the questions mothers are asking.

If you've ever screamed in the car, forgotten every form until the night before, or wondered if you're the only one falling apart — this podcast is your proof that you're not broken, you're just telling the truth.

New episodes weekly. Join the Facebook group: facebook.com/groups/adhdmumspodcast

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  • 24 episodes
  • a few times a week
  • Avg 25 min
  • English

Episodes 24

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  • S4 · E7
    June 17 · 27 min

    7. MUM RAGE #2: 3 Reasons 'Just Breathe' Has Never Worked (and what does)

    A psychologist told me to do a body scan. I was lying on hard yellow grass in 38-degree heat with three kids screaming inside and ants on my arms, trying to feel my body. I felt nothing. Or I felt everything and couldn't name any of it. She concluded the problem was me. It wasn't. What We Cover Why 'just breathe' and body scans keep failing ADHD mums — and why that failure isn't yours The difference between early and late emotional intervention, and why the tools you've been given are timed wrong for your brain What alexithymia and interoceptive gaps actually mean when you're trying to regulate — and why you can't feel the water warming until the lid's already blown Why some of us start every single day with near-boiling water, and what that does to a nervous system that's been running like that for years The scheduled check-in — not a mindfulness practice, just a moment to know where you are before the day makes that impossible What to say to your partner when they ask if you're okay and you genuinely don't know The James Gross emotional regulation model — 40 years of research — and what it says about the moment you're being told to intervene What's coming next episode: delayed mum rage, the lid that blows after the stove's already off, and why 11pm panic isn't coming from nowhere Free Resources Energy Accounting Guide — mentioned in the episode. Helps you see your actual baseline and where the energy is going before you hit empty. 👉 https://adhdmums.com.au/product/adhd-mums-energy-accounting-guide/ ADHD Physical Health & Emotional Wellbeing Kit (Free) 👉 https://adhdmums.com.au/product/adhd-physical-health-emotional-wellbeing-kit/ Related Episodes S2 EP84 — I Love My Family… But I'm So F**king Angry (Mum Rage Part 1) S2 EP85 — Real Tools for Real Rage (Mum Rage Part 2) S3 EP52 — When HRT Isn't Enough: Mum Rage & Perimenopause Explained References Edel, M.-A., Rudel, A., Hubert, C., Scheele, D., Brüne, M., Juckel, G., & Assion, H.-J. (2010). Alexithymia, emotion processing and social anxiety in adults with ADHD. European Journal of Medical Research, 15(9), 403–409. https://doi.org/10.1186/2047-783X-15-9-403 Fischer, D., Messner, M., & Pollatos, O. (2017). Improvement of interoceptive processes after an 8-week body scan intervention. Frontiers in Human Neuroscience, 11, 452. https://doi.org/10.3389/fnhum.2017.00452 Gross, J. J. (2015). Emotion regulation: Current status and future prospects. Psychological Inquiry, 26(1), 1–26. https://doi.org/10.1080/1047840X.2014.940781 Quadt, L., Garfinkel, S. N., Mulcahy, J. S., Larsson, D. E. O., Silva, M., Jones, A.-M., Strauss, C., & Critchley, H. D. (2021). Interoceptive training to target anxiety in autistic adults (ADIE): A single-center, superiority randomized controlled trial. EClinicalMedicine, 39, 101042. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.eclinm.2021.101042 Shaw, P., Stringaris, A., Nigg, J., & Leibenluft, E. (2014). Emotion dysregulation in attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. American Journal of Psychiatry, 171(3), 276–293. https://doi.org/10.1176/appi.ajp.2013.13070966 Webb, T. L., Miles, E., & Sheeran, P. (2012). Dealing with feeling: A meta-analysis of the effectiveness of strategies derived from the process model of emotion regulation. Psychological Bulletin, 138(4), 775–808. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0027600 📬 Listener Questions & Community 🎙️ Ask a Listener Question (voice) Voice notes are preferred when possible — hearing your voice helps add context — but you’re very welcome to submit a written question instead. Send a WhatsApp voice or written on 0403 457 313 Send a SMS voice or written on 0403 457 313 👥 Join the ADHD Mums Facebook Group For community, shared language, and conversations with other mums who get it. https://www.facebook.com/groups/adhdmumspodcast

  • S4 · E5
    June 15 · 46 min

    5. What Do I Do When Being Reasonable Hasn't Worked? The School Escalation Pathway Schools Don't Tell You About - with Sara Hocking

    The principal told you to contact region. Region told you to contact the principal. You're sitting in your car wondering if you're going quietly insane. You're not — and neither is the principal. The system is built to do exactly this, to everyone inside it. Sara Hocking is back to map a way out, and the news isn't what you think. What We Cover The one subject line that forces an official response — and why most schools have been waiting for someone to send it The institutional rule that makes principals back their staff publicly even when they're moving things behind the scenes — and how to read the quiet changes The escalation pathway nobody hands you, and the exact point where 95% of parents tap out The strategic reason to keep going past that point even when it feels pointless Why teachers aren't ignoring you — Sara's frame for what's actually happening in the staffroom, and what they're being asked to triage every day The paper-trail trick you can do in 30 seconds on your phone after every conversation Why you arrive at every school meeting already at a ten, and what the other parents in the room don't realise about themselves What restraint, expulsion and catchment actually mean — and the policy vacuum that hands one principal the call when there should be a system holding it Stop waiting for an apology. Sara explains why it isn't coming from individuals, and what to watch for from the structure instead. Free Resources School Complaint & Escalation Guide: https://adhdmums.com.au/product/school-complaint-escalation-guide/ Quiet Exclusion Kit: https://adhdmums.com.au/product/quiet-exclusion-kit/ More from Sara Sara Hocking runs See Beyond — neuroaffirming, nervous-system-informed resources for parents and schools, including free printables you can send straight to your child's teacher: https://seebeyondau.org/ Paid Resources Making School Work — Parent Guide: https://adhdmums.com.au/product/making-school-work-parent-guide/ School Burnout — When School Can't Cope: https://adhdmums.com.au/product/adhd-school-burnout-when-school-cant-cope/ Related Episodes Sara's Part 1 — When You Stay Calm at School and Leave Feeling Like You Didn't Do Enough — Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/episode/6LrYWX3eDU3LeoC12kMw4A?si=5OwOPF0oQcGjiXhwzL69zQ | Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/adhd-mums/id1686843092?i=1000753099488 S3 EP8: Advocating for Your Child Shouldn't Break You — But It Often Does — https://adhdmums.com.au/podcast_episode/episode-8-quick-reset-advocating-for-your-child-shouldnt-break-you-but-it-often-does/ S3 EP7: The Great Gaslighting — When Schools Say 'We Don't See It' — https://adhdmums.com.au/podcast_episode/episode-7-school-series-the-great-gaslighting-when-schools-say-we-dont-see-it/ S3 EP9: When the IEP Meeting Feels Like a Battle You Didn't Ask For — https://adhdmums.com.au/podcast_episode/episode-9-when-the-iep-meeting-feels-like-a-battle-you-didnt-ask-for/ S3: When School Decides Your Child Is the Problem — https://adhdmums.com.au/adhd-podcast-episodes/when-school-decides-your-child-is-the-problem/ S3: Is the Problem the Child — Or the Learning Plan? — https://adhdmums.com.au/adhd-podcast-episodes/is-the-problem-the-child-or-the-learning-plan/ 📬 Listener Questions & Community 🎙️ Ask a Listener Question (voice) Voice notes are preferred when possible — hearing your voice helps add context — but you’re very welcome to submit a written question instead. Send a WhatsApp voice or written on 0403 457 313 Send a SMS voice or written on 0403 457 313 👥 Join the ADHD Mums Facebook Group For community, shared language, and conversations with other mums who get it. https://www.facebook.com/groups/adhdmumspodcast

  • S4 · E6
    June 10 · 22 min

    4. They Took Away the Village and Handed Us the iPad. Then They Told Us Not to Use It.

    A friend came over the other day. She'd just done a week on the Sunshine Coast with her three kids, the whole pack-up by herself. We were sitting at my kitchen table doing that thing where you're laughing and crying at the same time. She couldn't get her kids to put the bins out because they were glued to their iPads. I said yep, same. The deeper problem isn't just the iPad. It's that someone pulled every single support structure out from under us, handed us a screen, and then put the guilt on top. What We Cover The Sunshine Coast kitchen table moment — the bins, the iPads, the laughing-crying The Christmas holidays Minecraft trap — how the rules got relaxed in December and what's still happening in May Three things that have completely changed about parenting in the last 40 years that nobody updated us on Why mums in 1990 weren't negotiating screen time — and what they had for free that we just don't The anticipatory regulation load — why parenting an ADHD child is three jobs stacked on top of each other, not one The dopamine input the world used to supply — and what happens when you take the iPad without replacing it Why every screen time recommendation contradicts every other one, and the researchers fight each other publicly We are the first generation parenting through this. There is no generational wisdom on iPads. Nobody knows the right amount. Not the paediatricians, not your mother-in-law, not the friend down the road. Free Resources Surviving the Mental Load of the School Year: https://adhdmums.com.au/product/adhd-school-year-mental-load-kit/ Household Family Meeting Template: https://adhdmums.com.au/product/adhd-household-family-meeting-template/ Related Episodes S3 EP12 QUICK RESET: I Can't Stop Snapping When My Child Does This One Thing — https://adhdmums.com.au/podcast_episode/episode-12-quick-reset-i-cant-stop-snapping-when-my-child-does-this-one-thing/ S3: When a Neuroscientist Says iPads Cause ADHD — And You Wonder if You've Damaged Your Kids — https://adhdmums.com.au/adhd-podcast-episodes/when-a-neuroscientist-says-ipads-cause-adhd-and-you-wonder-if-youve-damaged-your-kids/ S2 EP22: Is It ADHD or Motherhood? — https://adhdmums.com.au/podcast_episode/episode-22-is-it-adhd-or-motherhood-solo-episode/ S3 EP22 QUICK RESET: Why Self-Care Feels Like Another F*cking Task — https://adhdmums.com.au/podcast_episode/episode-22-quick-reset-why-self-care-feels-like-another-fcking-task/ S3 EP45 QUICK RESET: The Biggest Lie Parents Believe During School Holidays — https://adhdmums.com.au/podcast_episode/episode-45-quick-reset-the-biggest-lie-parents-believe-during-school-holidays-this-is-what-everyone-does/ References & Further Reading Parent–child interaction load in ADHD households: Barkley, R. A., Anastopoulos, A. D., Guevremont, D. C., & Fletcher, K. E. (1992). Adolescents with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder: Mother–adolescent interactions, family beliefs and conflicts, and maternal psychopathology. Journal of Abnormal Child Psychology, 20(3), 263–288. https://doi.org/10.1007/BF00916692 The collapse of unsupervised childhood: Skenazy, L. (2021). Free-Range Kids: How Parents and Teachers Can Let Go and Let Grow (2nd ed.). Jossey-Bass. Movement: https://letgrow.org The case that screens are driving a youth mental health crisis: Haidt, J. (2024). The Anxious Generation. Penguin Press. The case that the panic is overblown: Etchells, P. (2024). Unlocked: The Real Science of Screen Time. Piatkus. (Named alongside Haidt because the two contradict each other — which is the point.) No strong causal evidence that screens cause ADHD: Levelink, B., et al. (2021). Association between recreational screen time and attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder. JAMA Pediatrics. Via: https://www.adhdevidence.org/blog/pair-of-large-u-s-cohort-studies-find-little-to-no-evidence-of-association-between-child-and-adolescent-adhd-and-digital-media-screen-time Insufficient evidence for hard screen-time limits (2019 guidance): Royal College of Paediatrics and Child Health. (2019). The health impacts of screen time: A guide for clinicians and parents. (Note: this guidance was withdrawn in February 2024 — the position above is as of their 2019 publication.) 📬 Listener Questions & Community 🎙️ Ask a Listener Question (voice) Voice notes are preferred when possible — hearing your voice helps add context — but you’re very welcome to submit a written question instead. Send a WhatsApp voice or written on 0403 457 313 Send a SMS voice or written on 0403 457 313 👥 Join the ADHD Mums Facebook Group For community, shared language, and conversations with other mums who get it. https://www.facebook.com/groups/adhdmumspodcast

  • S4 · E4
    June 8 · 25 min

    MUM RAGE #1: 3 Reasons ADHD Mum Rage Feels Like It Came Out of Nowhere. (It Didn't.)

    I picked up the kids in my husband's car the other day. The youngest said something. The next one waited until they finished, then said something back. There was a pause. I turned around and looked at three kids not even fighting and thought, is this how pickup goes? In my car, it's on the second they get in. Someone's interrupting, someone's yelling, I'm turning the music up to drown them out, ready to throw myself onto the driveway while it's moving. Same kids. Same school. Different mum. What We Cover The hubby-car pickup vs my-car pickup — same kids, same school, completely different ride What happens to your nervous system when you're already at a rolling boil before the kids even get in the car Interoception — why the signals your body's been sending all afternoon don't land in real time for an ADHD brain Alexithymia — the clinical inability to name a feeling in the moment, and the 42–51% of ADHD adults living inside it Why mum rage feels like it came out of nowhere when it didn't, and why 'try harder, breathe more, be more like other mums at pickup' was never the answer The dinner-time cheese moment — the fan, the dog, the kid in the shower, the TV, the iPad — and why it was never about the cheese Who actually benefits when the rage gets called your temperament instead of your load — and why the lavender oil keeps not working Part 1 of 2 — what's happening underneath. Part 2 is what to do about it. Related Episodes S2 EP84: Mum Rage Part 1 (Jacinta Thomson) — https://adhdmums.com.au/podcast_episode/episode-84-i-love-my-family-but-im-so-fking-angry-mum-rage-part-1/ S2 EP85: Mum Rage Part 2 — Real Tools for Real Rage — https://adhdmums.com.au/podcast_episode/episode-85-real-tools-for-real-rage-mum-rage-part-2real-tools-for-real-rage-mum-rage-part-2/ EP52 HORMONES: When HRT Isn't Enough — Mum Rage & Perimenopause Explained (Dr Sunita Chelva) — https://adhdmums.com.au/podcast_episode/episode-52-hormones-when-hrt-isnt-enough-mum-rage-perimenopause-explained/ EP82: Overstimulated Before 7am (Rachel Few) — https://adhdmums.com.au/adhd-podcast-episodes/rachel-few/ EP12 QUICK RESET: I Can't Stop Snapping When My Child Does This — https://adhdmums.com.au/podcast_episode/episode-12-quick-reset-i-cant-stop-snapping-when-my-child-does-this-one-thing/ S3: I'm Gentle With My Daughter for Ten Minutes, Then I Tell Myself to Stop Being Such a F*cking Embarrassment — https://adhdmums.com.au/adhd-podcast-episodes/im-gentle-with-my-daughter-for-ten-minutes-then-i-tell-myself-to-stop-being-such-a-fcking-embarrassment/ References: Bruton, M., Hall, S. S., & Pollock, M. (2025). Diminished interoceptive accuracy in attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder: A systematic review. Psychophysiology, 62(2), e14750. https://doi.org/10.1111/psyp.14750 Edel, M.-A., Rudel, A., Hubert, C., Scheele, D., Brüne, M., Juckel, G., & Assion, H.-J. (2010). Alexithymia, emotion processing and social anxiety in adults with ADHD. European Journal of Medical Research, 15(9), 403–409. — Found 22% of ADHD adults met TAS-20 cutoff (≥61). Donfrancesco, R., Di Trani, M., Gregori, P., Auguanno, G., Melegari, M. G., Zaninotto, S., & Luby, J. (2013). Attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder and alexithymia: A pilot study. ADHD Attention Deficit and Hyperactivity Disorders, 5(4), 361–367. 📬 Listener Questions & Community 🎙️ Ask a Listener Question (voice) Voice notes are preferred when possible — hearing your voice helps add context — but you’re very welcome to submit a written question instead. Send a WhatsApp voice or written on 0403 457 313 Send a SMS voice or written on 0403 457 313 👥 Join the ADHD Mums Facebook Group For community, shared language, and conversations with other mums who get it. https://www.facebook.com/groups/adhdmumspodcast

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