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ZENBEHAVIOR

zenstateofmindwriter

Zenbehavior is a podcast about the art of becoming the person who can build the life she actually wants.

Hosted by Chinecherem Udegbunam, also known as zenstateofmindwriter—a writer, speaker, and founder of New You Lab, a space for women to reinvent themselves and learn to become the experience they want to have. She also writes The Game W/ zenstateofmindwriter, a newsletter on Substack about the psychology of desire—sex, love, money, ambition, and everything in between.

Zenbehavior explores the ideas, behaviors, and uncomfortable truths that help you become more self-possessed, ambitious, discerning, and free. We talk about the things that shape the quality of your life—love, sex, money, friendship, family, work, ambition, desire, standards, power, identity, and the rules you’ve inherited without ever deciding whether you wanted them.

This is not a podcast about becoming a better-behaved person. It’s about becoming more conscious of the game you’re playing, understanding why you play it, and deciding what you want to do from there.

If you’re interested in thinking for yourself, wanting more from life, and developing the nerve and competence to actually go after it, you’ll probably find something here worth keeping.

For collaborations, questions, guest inquiries, or just to say hello: hello@zenstateofmindwriter.com

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  • 20 episodes
  • Avg 45 min
  • English

Episodes 20

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  • S3 · E152
    September 16 · 42 min

    #152. Why Detaching is so hard. And how to actually do it.

    You know you need to let go. So why the fuck is detachment so hard? In this episode, we’re getting into the why and what actually has to change for you to detach. You’ll learn how to stop chasing closure, interrupt obsessive thought loops, tolerate uncertainty, withdraw your attention without becoming cold, and redirect your energy back into your own life. Because real detachment isn’t pretending you don’t care. It’s caring without handing someone else the remote control to your peace.

  • S3 · E151
    September 16 · 49 min

    #151. How to Fuck to Imprint

    Some people have sex with you and become a memory. Others become a reference point. You’re learning to be the second for other people. In this episode, we’re talking about the psychology of unforgettable sex—what makes an intimate experience linger long after the physical moment is over, and why chemistry alone isn’t always what creates that effect.

  • S3 · E150
    September 16 · 43 min

    #150. How to Stop Hating Men after being hurt so much

    In this episode, we’re unpacking what happens when disappointment becomes resentment and how to stop carrying the emotional residue of men who hurt you into the life you’re building. You can remember what happened without letting it decide what happens next.

  • S3 · E149
    September 16 · 27 min

    #149. How to Unfuck Your life in 7 days!

    You don’t need a new personality. You need to stop doing the things that keep fucking up your life. In this episode, we’re doing a reset. Just seven days of deliberate decisions that force you back into the driver’s seat. If you’ve been feeling stuck, scattered, underwhelmed, emotionally messy, or simply tired of your own patterns, start here. Your life doesn’t need another promise. It needs a fucking intervention.

  • S3 · E147
    August 12 · 38 min

    #147. How to stop self sabotaging

    Sometimes you’re not stuck because you don’t know what to do. You’re stuck because some part of you has learned to feel safer in the familiar—even when the familiar is keeping you small. In this episode, we’re getting underneath self-sabotage: the procrastination, inconsistency, overthinking, disappearing when things start working, choosing what feels familiar over what you actually want, and quietly finding ways to ruin the things you prayed for. We’ll look at why you keep doing things you know are against your own interests, what your self-sabotage is actually protecting you from, and how to stop fighting yourself every time your life starts changing. Because sometimes the hardest person to convince that you deserve a different life is you.

  • S3 · E146
    July 9 · 36 min

    #146. The Art of Fucking

    Whether you’re single, dating, or in a long-term relationship, this conversation is about becoming a more attentive lover, a more connected partner, and someone who understands that intimacy is an art not a performance. Tune in and share the love.

  • S3 · E145
    June 26 · 23 min

    #145. Practice Detachment

    #145. In this episode, we explore how attachment creates unnecessary suffering, why people chase what isn’t choosing them, and how detachment gives you clarity, peace, and power. Tune in and share the love

  • S3 · E144
    June 25 · 49 min

    #144. Master Selfishness

    Selfishness has a terrible reputation, and yet most people are suffering because they abandoned themselves to keep everyone else comfortable. In this episode, we redefine selfishness and why protecting your peace is necessary.

  • S3 · E143
    June 25 · 1 hr 16 min

    #143. Master seduction

    Most people think seduction begins in the bedroom. It doesn’t. It begins in the mind. In this episode, you’ll learn why some people command attention effortlessly while others are constantly overlooked—and how to cultivate the kind of presence that’s impossible to ignore. This episode is simply about becoming someone people feel before they fully understand.

  • S3 · E138
    March 6 · 59 min

    #138. You are the niche: How to monetize yourself

    Making money online. From an artist’s perspective More step by step instructions coming on my YouTube live. Subscribe and stay tuned. Subscribe here: https://youtube.com/@zenstateofmindwriter

  • S2 · E133
    Dec 1, 2025 · 10 min

    #133. Confidence is Evidence

    Yes. Evidence. What you think you should do to feel or be confident are only symptoms of confident people. The real work happens behind closed doors

Showing 1–20 of 20 episodes