Anxiety is so rubbish, it is one of the most deeply unpleasant experiences that anyone can have.
And because it’s so horrible, it’s very common to become anxious about getting anxious. Then you can get caught in a cycle of being anxious about your anxiety, which ironically makes you more anxious.
When I had my burnout in 2022 and was experiencing regular panic attacks, I found my world getting smaller and smaller as I was afraid I’d experience a panic attack somewhere public, so I started restricting where I felt ok to go. And of course, the places I felt ok got fewer and fewer until my world was tiny.
Also, everywhere I turned the advice was to breathe through my anxiety, but this wasn’t helping me, in fact when I was focusing on my breath I felt even more panicky!
Now, I love breath work. I am a yoga teacher and I do breath work every day, but when your body is in a heightened state of anxiety, and it thinks it’s in danger, sitting still and forcing yourself to concentrate on your breath is not always the best thing to do.
What helped me was seeing the distinction between the two types of anxiety:
* The original anxiety
* The anxiety about the anxiety
I didn’t have much control over the first type in the moment, but if I watched it, it had a beginning, a peak, and then it passed. It was really, indescribably unpleasant, but it wasn’t going to kill me, and it couldn’t be more powerful than me because it was me.
It was a sign from my body, not a moral failure.
The second type was a bit more tricky; this one could seep into everything, but this is the one I had a bit more control over.
It consisted of all the stories I was telling myself about the first type of anxiety, my reaction to it, and the way I kept pushing it away and trying to control it, and the way I was shrinking my life to try and avoid it.
Weirdly, it was by accepting my anxiety that I was able to move through it.
And part of accepting my anxiety was developing a toolkit for things to do when I can feel the physical symptoms of anxiety rear their head, and knowing that these might be different tools to the ones I need when I am in a calmer state.
Here are 3 things that aren’t breathwork that can help with the physical symptoms of anxiety:
* Eat a very sour sweet - this is a grounding body technique that helps move your attention away from ruminating and scanning and to a strong sensation.
* Splash your face with cold water, this stimulates the mammalian dive reflex and stops you spiralling.
* Do a simple but engrossing mind puzzle. I like to think of a band name for every letter of the alphabet. The key is that it needs to be hard enough to engross you but easy enough not to stress you, think something you’d play on a long car journey.
Please note that these tools might not work for you every time. It’s so important to experiment yourself and find what works for you, and to know that you are not a failure if certain tools that seem to work for others don’t work for you. And just because something doesn’t work now doesn’t mean it won’t be useful to you in the future.
Also, these techniques are never meant to be a replacement for therapy or medication.
Here is a short anxiety release that you might find useful
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