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Relationship Advice

Thrive Therapy - Colter Bloxom, Lauren Mokarry, and Cayla Bozovich

Relationship Advice helps listeners uncover the stuck spots in their relationships by taking expert advice from three licensed professional counselors and boiling it down into digestible tips and tools. Colter, Cayla, and Lauren help people to see that the first step to connecting with somebody else is by connecting with you. They focus their show on understanding and navigating the cycles that couples face, how to practice individuation, and staying in an emotionally regulated state. Just them each week as they come with a jam packed agenda to help you thrive in your relationships.


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  • 39 episodes
  • a few times a week
  • Avg 46 min
  • English

Episodes 39

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  • Monday · 57 min

    The Difference Between Being Loved and Being Liked with Jonathan Van Viegen

    Free 10 Day Couples Challenge Try Relationship Academy Can a marriage survive when love remains, but genuine likability has eroded? In this episode, marriage and family therapist and author Jonathan Van Viegen joins us to explore why restoring mutual likability matters far more than obsessing over chore division or endless interrogation. We unpack how shifting from scarcity-driven "needs" to open "wants"—and balancing radical maturity with forgiveness—can transform relational injuries into lasting connection. Main Talking Points: Loving Versus Liking Curiosity Over Resentment Radical Behavioral Maturity Navigating Forgiveness Journeys Eliminating "Why" Interrogations Reframing Needs To Wants Rebuilding a thriving partnership isn't about perfection or scorekeeping; it's about showing up with the willingness to choose each other every day. Real connection unfolds when you trade defensive interrogation for curiosity and work together toward mutual abundance. Connect with Jonathan Van Viegen: Jonathan Van Viegen’s Book: Choosing Us https://jonathanvanviegen.com/book Jonathan Van Viegen's Website: https://jonathanvanviegen.com Give Me Discounts! Kiwi Fodzyme - Get 30% off your first order! Tanasi - Use code “relationship" for 25% off your first order. *If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a⁠ review in iTunes⁠? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • October 8 · 24 min

    Finding The One? Try Becoming The One: QUICK ADVICE with Monica Berg

    Join our live coaching call tomorrow at 3pm EST for Relationship Advice listeners! Click here to sign up. Today is the last day to get in at the founders rate! Check out Monica's Masterclass Follow Monica on instagram Stop trying to “find the one” — focus on becoming the one. A strong relationship starts with knowing yourself: your values, purpose, patterns, and who you want to become. The danger is expecting a partner or marriage to somehow complete your growth for you. The right relationship should help you become more yourself, not less. Monica’s Michelangelo vs. Golem distinction is probably the strongest concept in the episode: a healthy partner helps reveal a version of you that you also want to become. An unhealthy dynamic tries to sculpt you into the person they want you to be. Relationship satisfaction has a lot to do with how we interpret our partner. Early on, we naturally magnify the positive; later, we can start magnifying the negative. Healthy relationships require intentionally cultivating appreciation, challenging our assumptions, and reframing what’s happening instead of automatically concluding, “My partner is the problem.” Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • October 5 · 51 min

    The Fight Is Not About The Fight

    Free 10 Day Couples Challenge Try Relationship Academy Why do small everyday annoyances so easily turn into explosive arguments? When couples get stuck in repetitive friction, the surface issue is rarely the real battleground. In this episode, we explore how superficial conflicts actually point to deeper emotional needs, and how stepping back allows you to move from defensive cycles into genuine connection. Main Talking Points: Underlying Relational Drivers Power And Control Closeness And Care Respect And Recognition Window Of Tolerance Intention Versus Impact True relational resolution isn't about winning an argument over surface logistics, but about creating enough safety to understand what is truly being triggered. When you look past the immediate friction, every conflict becomes an opportunity to deepen trust and mutual care. Give Me Discounts! Kiwi Fodzyme - Get 30% off your first order! Tanasi - Use code “relationship" for 25% off your first order. *If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a⁠ review in iTunes⁠? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • September 28 · 58 min

    Why You Keep Having the Same Sex feat. Laurie Watson

    Free 10 Day Couples Challenge Try Relationship Academy Why do so many couples find themselves stuck repeating the same awkward sexual patterns or avoiding physical intimacy altogether? True sexual connection isn't about forced perfection or quick mechanical fixes, but about building attachment security and communicating openly about your erotic mind. In this episode, Dr. Laurie Watson unpacks how to navigate desire discrepancies, tolerate vulnerability, and reframe sexual friction into deeper relational safety. Main Talking Points: Sex Therapy Beyond Mechanics Tolerating Awkward Intimacy Attachment In The Bedroom Individuation Fueling Erotic Energy Managing Desire Discrepancies Debunking Common Sex Myths Great sex doesn't require flawless performance, but rather the courage to tolerate anxiety, honor differences, and stay curious about one another. When you turn sexual friction into honest dialogue, awkwardness becomes a doorway to genuine connection. Visit Dr. Laurie Watson's Website: https://www.lauriewatson.com Give Me Discounts! Kiwi Fodzyme - Get 30% off your first order! Tanasi - Use code “relationship" for 25% off your first order. *If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a⁠ review in iTunes⁠? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • September 24 · 28 min

    Why You Keep Dating The Same Person In A Different Body: Dr. Gillian O'Shea Brown

    Join Relationship Academy today for a complementary 1:1 with one of the hosts! Right now, buy one pair of glasses and get 20% off any additional pairs at WarbyParker.com/RELATIONSHIP Dr. Gillian's Book! We often repeat the same relationship pattern with different people because familiar pain can feel safer than uncertainty. Noticing the pattern is the beginning of change—but lasting growth requires identifying the unmet need behind it. The “erotic emotional map” helps reveal recurring dynamics by describing the qualities of past relationships. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • September 21 · 44 min

    Stop Taking Your Partner's Feelings Personally

    Free 10 Day Couples Challenge Try Relationship Academy When your partner walks through the door in a bad mood, do you immediately wonder what you did wrong or rush to fix it? Taking your partner's emotions personally turns their everyday stress into relational friction, forcing them to manage your reaction on top of their own feelings. In this episode, we unpack the shift from carrying emotional responsibility to offering true empathy, giving both of you permission to feel. Main Talking Points: Personalizing Versus Empathy Unpacking Emotional Responsibility Breaking Fixing Cycles Tolerating Partner Discomfort Reducing Emotion Layers Frameworks Over Scripts Secure relationships aren't built on avoiding uncomfortable feelings, but on cultivating the capacity to tolerate and hold space for them together. Real connection happens when you allow feelings to be felt without making them about you. Give Me Discounts! Kiwi Fodzyme - Get 30% off your first order! Tanasi - Use code “relationship" for 25% off your first order. *If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a⁠ review in iTunes⁠? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • September 17 · 18 min

    Quick Advice: HALT

    Get The Founders Rate For Relationship Academy Get $100 off Spark My Relationship Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • September 14 · 46 min

    What Happens When We Betray Ourselves With Jessica Pressler

    Free 10 Day Couples Challenge Try Relationship Academy Why do we so often find ourselves repeating the same painful relational patterns even after promising to choose differently? In this episode, therapist and author Jessica Anne Pressler joins us to unpack how early protective survival strategies can evolve into adult self-sabotage. By shifting our attention from dissecting a partner's flaws to understanding our own internal boundaries, we move away from reflexive self-abandonment and step toward deep self-compassion and relational security. Main Talking Points: Unpacking Internal Self-Sabotage Reframing Childhood Coping Mechanisms Navigating Narcissistic Relationship Dynamics Overcoming Relational Self-Abandonment Cultivating Deep Self-Awareness Integrating Protective Inner Parts Healing begins not by fighting the parts of us that try to keep us safe, but by offering them the self-compassion and internal leadership they were always looking for. Connect with Jessica Anne Pressler: Jessica Anne Pressler's Website: https://www.jessicaannepressler.com Jessica Anne Pressler's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jessicaannepressler Give Me Discounts! Kiwi Fodzyme - Get 30% off your first order! Tanasi - Use code “relationship" for 25% off your first order. *If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a⁠ review in iTunes⁠? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • September 10 · 25 min

    Why Anxious And Avoidant Attachment Styles Aren't Red Flags with Dr. Diane Heller

    Join us in Relationship Academy to continue the conversation! ⁠ 7 day free trial and then get the founders rate of $25/month Take Dr. Heller's Free Attachment Quiz Clean out your closet by downloading VINTED for free! In this episode of Relationship Advice, Colter talks with Dr. Diane Heller about anxious, avoidant, ambivalent, and disorganized attachment patterns. They explore why these patterns are often intelligent survival strategies—not character flaws or relationship “red flags”—and how early relational wounds can shape the way people experience closeness, conflict, and love. Dr. Heller explains that everyone has an innate capacity for secure attachment and that understanding these patterns can help partners respond with more compassion instead of blame. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • September 7 · 52 min

    How Neurodivergence Plays a Role In Relationships

    Free 10 Day Couples Challenge Try Relationship Academy When everyday friction is automatically read as a lack of effort or affection, couples often get trapped in painful, defensive loops. How do we move away from assigning negative intent and toward honoring the literal differences in how our brains process the world? In this episode, we unpack how neurodivergent traits—like executive dysfunction and sensory processing differences—can show up in relationships, and how framing these realities through the lens of individuation creates a path toward genuine safety and collaborative connection. Main Talking Points: Executive Functioning Differences Cognitive Processing Variances Sensory Profile Mismatches Interoceptive Sensation Nuances Mono Tropism Rigidity Unmasking Relational Safety The goal isn't to force a single, shared reality onto two different minds, but to build enough safety and curiosity to accommodate the unique ways you both navigate the world. Give Me Discounts! Kiwi Fodzyme - Get 30% off your first order! Tanasi - Use code “relationship" for 25% off your first order. *If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a⁠ review in iTunes⁠? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • September 2 · 18 min

    Stop Saying "I Feel Bad"

    Join us in Relationship Academy to continue the conversation! 7 day free trial and then get the founders rate of $25/month In this episode of Quick Advice, Colter and Cayla jump into why one partner might just say "I feel bad" rather than tapping into the emotion they are actually feeling. It can be frustrating for both partner! Let's discuss. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • August 31 · 58 min

    How to Use Practical Intuition to Transform Your Relationships with Laura Day

    Free 10 Day Couples Challenge Try Relationship Academy How often do we stay trapped in repetitive relational friction, assuming the answers lie entirely within our overthinking minds? In this episode, author and intuitive consultant Laura Day joins the show to demystify intuition as a grounded, practical tool for human connection. We explore how moving away from protective internal loops toward actionable, embodied behavior can rewire our relational dynamics and build deep, mutual clarity. Main Talking Points: Demystifying Everyday Intuitive Data Rewiring Relational Trauma Patterns Goal-Driven Non-Local Communication Embodied Action Over Overthinking Cultivating Mutual Relational Value Redirecting Unproductive Internal Dialogue True connection does not require managing another person's reactions; it unfolds when we ground ourselves in actionable clarity and let concrete experience reshape how we relate. Laura Day's Website: https://lauraday.com Laura Day's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lauradayintuit Laura Day's YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/user/LauraDayCircle Give Me Discounts! Kiwi Fodzyme - Get 30% off your first order! Tanasi - Use code “relationship" for 25% off your first order. *If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a⁠ review in iTunes⁠? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • August 24 · 56 min

    Why Couples Stop Having Sex (And How to Fix It) with George Faller

    Free 10 Day Couples Challenge Try Relationship Academy Why do couples so often fall into standoffs where one partner needs emotional closeness to feel physical desire, while the other needs physical touch to feel emotionally open? In this episode, Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) trainer and author George Faller joins us to unpack how stress, polyvagal state shifts, and distinct attachment cycles govern relational dynamics. By learning to slow down protective reactions, partners can reframe relational friction into a doorway for true emotional and physical intimacy. Main Talking Points: Navigating High-Stress Trauma Polyvagal Brain States Intersecting Attachment Cycles Decoupling Relational Brakes The Crisscross Pattern Externalizing Negative Cycles Intimacy is not about eliminating relational friction, but about creating enough safety to reveal the deeper longings hidden beneath protective defenses. When partners slow down and face these cycles together, the body and heart naturally return to connection. George Faller's Website: https://www.georgefaller.com George Faller's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/fallergeorge Give Me Discounts! Kiwi Fodzyme - Get 30% off your first order! Tanasi - Use code “relationship" for 25% off your first order. *If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a⁠ review in iTunes⁠? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • August 20 · 22 min

    Charisma Is A Real Thing With Olivia Fox Cabane: QUICK ADVICE

    GET $100 OFF SPARK MY RELATIONSHIP Free 10 Day Couples Challenge⁠ Olivia's Website Let's talk about the three components of charisma, why it differs from liability, and how you can learn it! Give Me Discounts! ⁠Kiwi Fodzyme⁠ - Get 30% off your first order! ⁠Tanasi⁠ - Use code “relationship" for 25% off your first order. *If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a⁠⁠ review in iTunes⁠⁠? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • August 17 · 54 min

    Decoding the Digital Age with Bridget Todd

    Free 10 Day Couples Challenge Try Relationship Academy Can artificial intelligence ever truly replace the messy, necessary friction that defines genuine human intimacy? While emerging technology promises seamless interactions and shortcut solutions to interpersonal conflict, relying on smooth algorithms can quietly erode the reciprocity and vulnerability required for deep bonds. In this episode, tech journalist Bridget Todd joins the hosts to discuss navigating AI in our personal lives while maintaining authentic connection, intentional transparency, and personal agency. Main Talking Points: Human Versus Artificial Intimacy Value of Relational Friction Prioritizing Transparency and Consent Preserving Genuine Reciprocity Corporate Extraction Concerns Reclaiming Personal Agency True relational health doesn't come from outsourcing our emotional labor to algorithms, but from actively choosing presence and honesty amidst life's friction. When we prioritize mutual effort over algorithmic convenience, we protect the depth and safety that make human connection irreplaceable. Bridget Todd’s Website: https://www.bridget-todd.com Give Me Discounts! Kiwi Fodzyme - Get 30% off your first order! Tanasi - Use code “relationship" for 25% off your first order. *If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a⁠ review in iTunes⁠? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • August 13 · 23 min

    Why Do People Cheat? QUICK ADVICE with Dr. Glenn Hutchinson

    ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Spark My Relationship Course:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Normally $197, you can access for a limited time by only paying $25! FREE 10 Day Couples Challenge⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Check out Relationship Academy! ⁠⁠ UNFAITHFUL MINDS VINTED - Download and start turning those extra clothes into cash ⁠⁠⁠⁠Simple Practice⁠⁠⁠⁠ - If you're in mental health and not using simple practice then what are you doing??? *If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a⁠⁠⁠ review in iTunes⁠⁠⁠? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • August 10 · 53 min

    What We Can Learn From Pursuers

    Is the partner who constantly pushes for conversation actually protecting your relationship? While pursuers often get labeled as demanding or hyper-vigilant, their relentless focus on connection holds vital lessons for withdrawing spouses. In this episode, we explore how shifting from defensive withdrawal to active engagement turns relational friction into a catalyst for deeper safety and intimacy. Main Talking Points: Modeling Emotional Vulnerability Addressing Relational Conflict Prioritizing Intimate Connection Asserting Authentic Needs Practicing Emotional Co-Regulation Overcoming Avoidant Cycles True relational growth happens when we stop viewing pursuit as an attack and start letting our partner's strengths refine our habits. When you embrace the pursuer's drive for connection, friction transforms from a source of anxiety into a shared pathway toward safety. *If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a⁠ review in iTunes⁠? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • August 6 · 43 min

    Would You Get Rid Of "Fear" If You Could?

    FREE 10 Day Couples Challenge⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Check out Relationship Academy! ⁠ Would you get rid of fear if you had the choice? In this episode, we explore what fear actually is, why it exists, and how it affects us both physically and psychologically. We also discuss the evolutionary purpose of fear, when it becomes maladaptive, and how tools like mindfulness, deep breathing, cognitive reframing, exposure, therapy, and journaling can help us regulate and process fear in healthier ways. In this episode: Understanding the Purpose of Fear The Fight-or-Flight Response Physical and Psychological Fear When Fear Becomes Maladaptive Regulating Fear and Anxiety Processing Fear Through Growth Give Me Discounts! ⁠Kiwi Fodzyme⁠ - Get 30% off your first order! ⁠⁠⁠Simple Practice⁠⁠⁠ - If you're in mental health and not using simple practice then what are you doing??? ⁠⁠⁠Spark My Relationship Course:⁠⁠⁠ Get $100 off our online course. Visit⁠⁠⁠ SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock⁠⁠⁠ for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! ⁠Tanasi⁠ - Use code “relationship" for 25% off your first order. *If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a⁠⁠ review in iTunes⁠⁠? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

  • August 3 · 51 min

    Why Relationships Make Us Feel Like Children Again

    FREE 10 Day Couples Challenge⁠⁠ ⁠⁠Check out Relationship Academy! Why do our deepest relationship conflicts have the power to make us feel like children again? In this episode, we explore how interactions with partners and family members can activate old attachment wounds, causing us to regress into familiar patterns like protesting, people-pleasing, shutting down, or pulling away. We also discuss why healing can initially make these dynamics feel even harder—and how therapy, co-regulation, boundaries, and greater self-awareness can help us respond from our adult selves and create healthier relationships. In this episode: Childhood Attachment Wounds Regressive Relationship Patterns Protest and Shutdown Healing Through Therapy Practicing Co-Regulation Becoming Your Adult Self Give Me Discounts! Kiwi Fodzyme - Get 30% off your first order! ⁠⁠Simple Practice⁠⁠ - If you're in mental health and not using simple practice then what are you doing??? ⁠⁠Spark My Relationship Course:⁠⁠ Get $100 off our online course. Visit⁠⁠ SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock⁠⁠ for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! Tanasi - Use code “relationship" for 25% off your first order. *If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a⁠ review in iTunes⁠? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Showing 1–20 of 39 episodes