Are You Relentlessly Resilient?

Kathryn Severns Avery

Life knocks us down. Resilience is what gets us back up. When you are relentlessly resilient, it doesn't matter what life throws at you, you know you will be triumphant.

Subscribe Listen in podnod RSS feed Show website

71 episodes
Updated Saturday

Episodes71

Newest first

Saturday · 4 min
Give Yourself a Break
High standards are a sign of excellent self-esteem. But sometimes our standards are so high they are unattainable or unsustainable. Insisting on perfection or using perfectionism as a way to control life, our actions, or the actions of others, is counterproductive. Sometimes we need to give ourselves and others a break both literally and figuratively. Taking a break, pausing for a moment and connecting with our emotions and recognizing what we are doing, thinking, and feeling provides and opportunity to redirect our effort in more productive ways. Taking a break can allow us to focus on what's right with a situation rather than what's wrong. Or appreciate what we have rather than what we don't. Life is full of opportunities to expand our awareness and to grow. By embracing your humanness you can transcend it. So, give yourself and others a break today.
July 29 · 4 min
Extra Effort
Today I had an extraordinary experience. I got to see Big Boy, the world's largest steam locomotive as it traveled from Denver to Greeley - part of the 250th anniversary of the founding of the USA. When I heard the train was going to pass through Denver, I knew I wanted to see it. I invited a friend to join me. We traveled north to Commerce City and joined a throng of people gathered trackside near a railroad crossing. We waited for almost two hours to see the train. I had goosebumps and my inner child was giddy to watch this behemoth of a steam locomotive pass by, the American and Colorado flags on the train's cowcatcher fluttering in the breeze. Was it worth the extra effort to make it happen. ABSOLUTELY! What in your life needs a little extra effort or is calling you to step up your game? Whatever it is, it's worth it.
July 25 · 5 min
Get 'Er Done!
Yesterday (Friday) was a particularly busy day for me. When I woke up this morning, I realized I hadn't created a podcast and I'm committed to getting them out on Wednesdays and Fridays. Rather than beat myself up about not following through, I chose to get 'er done. Far too often we let our need for perfection thwart our progress. AND, getting something done "messy" doesn't preclude us from going back and making it better. Our egos, in a misguided attempt to protect us, tell us we "should" do it perfectly. Total BS - belief systems. It's taken me a lifetime to learn people find me more relatable when I'm vulnerable and imperfect. I don't like showing those sides of myself, but I learn so much when I do. So today, whatever it is you need to do - get 'er done! Thanks for listening! Kathryn
July 22 · 5 min
Best Birthday Gift Ever!
Yes, today is my birthday. My best birthday gift today? The gift of being consistently consistent. It's obviously a gift I'm giving to myself, like the gift of keeping my promises to myself and fearlessly embracing the challenge of change. I can't imagine spending my life committed to maintaining the status quo. Yet there were decades of my life that I spent trying to keep things the same. It's impossible. Life is always moving forward whether we like it or not. I KNOW each and every experience prepares me for what is next. With a mindset like that I KNOW I can handle change - even when I might think I can't. Every emotional scar that has healed has its own type of beauty. The wound may have been painful, and it may have taken longer than I would have liked, but I did heal and thankfully I will continue to heal. Thanks for listening! Kathryn
July 17 · 5 min
You Have Permission
Are you waiting for permission to do something? What would happen if you gave yourself that permission? This week I stepped waaaaayyyyyyyy out of my comfort zone and did two powerful things. I gave myself permission to ask for help and I gave myself permission to share with a respected friend a proposed change was not something with which I was comfortable and to ask for clarification. Did I have anxiety? Yes. I did I do it any way? Yes. Changes we make in our lives may or may not be supported by those around us. Yet, when we are brave and give ourselves permission to feel the fear and do it anyway, great things can happen. If you had a permission from the Universe to do anything you wanted, what would you do? The good news is you do have permission. Now you need to work on your courage. Have a great weekend! Kathryn
July 15 · 5 min
Who's Filling Your Cup?
Sometimes we don't recognize our cup is empty. I was fortunate recently to take a trip to Montana to visit friends. Only then, when surrounded by people who love me and support me through thick and thin, did I realize how empty I was. A recent full parole board hearing for one of my husband's killers took place on Friday of last week. There was not an immediate decision and all weekend, I couldn't help but wonder if this man was going to be released. To take my mind off things, we went to a small town rodeo. The people watching was fantastic and so was the barbeque. Time to sit, thinks, feel, and be was just what I needed. I came back refreshed and ready to move forward with life again. Who's filling your cup? If you're interested in attended my free Intuitive Visioning Workshop on Thursday, July 23rd Noon mountain time, here's the link. https://us02web.zoom.us/j/88492416834?jst=2Hope to see you there!
July 8 · 5 min
Next Steps
You're making changes and things are going well, until they're not. Understanding the process of change means embracing setbacks and reframing them as setups for success. If you're like me, you think you have to have everything thought through and planned for every possible contingency before you start. You can't possibly do that because there will be curveballs you can't possibly anticipate. What if you trusted yourself and God, Jesus, your Higher Power or internal guidance, to show you the next right step? Mary Morrisey's book Brave Thinking poses a powerful question that will help you move forward no matter what your circumstances: What can I do now with what I have? The smallest of steps continues your forward movement and shows your commitment to your change/goal. Nothing in your journey is wasted as long as you keep moving towards your dreams. And what if your dreams seems impossible? Great! I've heard it said, "If you don't need God to help you fulfill your dream, it's way too small." So, what you can you do now with what you have? Get started.
July 1 · 5 min
Embrace the Suck
I recently read a blog post by my friend Gregory Russel Benedict about not being willing to suck at something new. The article really resonated with me because we almost always suck when we do something for the first time. The key is to be willing to be bad before you can be good. When I taught piano, I hated teaching adults. They expected to be able to play well instantly. Becoming accomplished at something requires time and effort, and the willingness to suck at it at first. Growth requires trying new things and silencing our inner critic long enough to begin to get better. Commitment and repetition are the keys to improvement. So, embrace the suck this week and know you're on your way to getting better. If you enjoyed this podcast, please like and share it. If you're interested in learning more about my Intuitive Visioning Workshops, drop me an email at kathrynsevernsavery@gmail.com. Till next time, remember we all suck at something until we don't . Kathryn
June 26 · 5 min
Embracing the Challenge of Change
I'm doing a deep dive on change and the challenges it presents. I'm writing a book about it! "Launch Your New Life - Embracing the Challenge of Change will be finished by August and available in September. We resist change, even though it's inevitable. There is a biological reason for this. Our nervous system perceived change as a threat, and, perhaps, a life threatening threat. And our bodies are right. Change means the life we are living, the person we are, will be different. We stay stuck because we would rather deal with what we know than what we don't know. We crave certainty. And life is, and always will be, uncertain. Over the next weeks and months, we'll continue to explore change and why resilience is such an important part of the process. Happy Friday! And thanks for listening. Kathryn
June 25 · 6 min
Preparation is Everything
Ready for a change? To increase your odds of success, prepare. Making a change obviously requires us to change. But most people secretly want to stay the same, but have the outcome that change brings. Lose 20 pounds but still eat anything you want. Save more money but keep your current spending habits. The key is to take small consistent steps towards implementing that change. I have a friend who needed to lose more than 100 pounds. She increased her odds of succeeding by focusing on losing 5 pounds, and then 5 more pounds. Realizing we won't see immediate results is often a deterrent to making change. But if you implement a change and acknowledge you won't see the major effects of the change for three to six months, perhaps you won't quit as easily. Change is an inevitable part of life. Wishing and wanting things to stay the same isn't possible. So take charge of your changes! Have comments about this podcast or a topic you'd like to hear my thoughts on? Let me know. Thanks for listening. Till next time, take care and be safe. Kathryn
June 19 · 5 min
Discomfort Means You're Growing!
Listeners know I am a student of change and resilience. When our efforts begin to pay off, are we ready for the change that success brings? I am starting to see things I've been working on for years start to come to fruition. It's exciting. It's terrifying at the same time. Why? Because in order to receive that success, I have to leave the part of me that believes I'm not worthy, or it will never happen behind. It also means that I am exposing new, and often vulnerable, parts of myself to others. Just as a toddler learning to walk falls down, I will stumble as I move forward into unknown territory. The worst thing I can do is say "This is uncomfortable. It's a sign I should stop." Discomfort means you're growing. Keep going!!!!! If you're ready to make a change in your life, your business, your organization/agency, join me at the next "Go Together/Grow Together" retreat in Golden, Colorado September 10, 11, and 12. Space is limited to just 7 lucky attendees. Don't miss this extraordinary opportunity to grow with support. Drop me an email to get more details. Have a great weekend! Kathryn
June 17 · 5 min
Life's Fractures
Fractures in our lives are not failures. They are the cracks through which wisdom can appear. I live at the top of a mountain and can see where a tiny pine tree seed found a spot of dirt in a crack in a rock and decided to grow. Were the conditions ideal? Of course not. Did that stop the seed from growing? No, over time the growing tree forced the crevice to open. I'm writing a new book "Launch Your New Life: Embracing the Challenge of Change". There are so many changes happening in my life, and in the lives of others I care about, I decided to create a guide to successfully navigating the choices we choose and the choices that life thrusts upon us. If you enjoy this episode, please share. And if you need ideas or information on managing change, reach out. I'd love to hear from you. Kathryn
June 6 · 5 min
Reclaiming My Magic
Every great story of overcoming features a Dark Night of the Soul, a descent into the Underworld, a reckoning with our shadow side and a re-emergence. When we are in the darkness, we can't see what's happening. We feel lost, vulnerable, and defeated believing this is our lot in life and it will not change. I spent several months in that dark place. Externally, you never would have realized it. I put on a brave face. But in today's episode I get real about emerging from that place and reclaiming my magic. If I can do it, you can too. Enjoy.
May 22 · 4 min
Dealing with Disappointment
This week was a tough week for me. I had a big disappointment which you'll hear about in the podcast. It was an opportunity to feel the disappointment and the anger, acknowledge it, and move on. Wallowing in disappointment wastes time and energy. Feel it, experience it, but don't get stuck in it. If you've done all you can do, if the situation is out of your control, surrender the disappointment, release it, and see what good thing comes in to replace what was lost or didn't happen. Have a wonderful weekend! Kathryn
May 13 · 5 min
Your Ringside Seat to The Fight of the Century!!!!
If you're like me, there are times in life when I fight harder for my limitations than I do for my strengths. The transition I'm experiencing in my life right now, is HARD. And my internal dialog blindside me and deliver a TKO I didn't even see coming. That's why paying attention to what we're telling ourselves and what we're thinking is soooo important when life is throwing us curveballs. It's easy to double down on negative chatter. Refuting stories we tell ourselves about who we are and what we are capable of takes discipline and commitment - the same kind any professional fighter has. They schedule their training and if they want to be champions, the stick to the schedule and push to become better versions of themselves. So, are you going to fight for your strengths of your limitations today? If you're ready to fight to become a better version of you, I'll be cheering you on ringside.
May 9 · 5 min
It's a Matter of Perspective
Is something that happens to you good or bad? It depends on your perspective. Hard things that happen may lead us to one of our biggest breakthroughs. When we honestly examine how we react or respond to something, we find that we have the ability to react differently. But our brains are designed to conserve energy and change takes effort. So we default to familiar, well-established habits of thinking and feeling and end up feeling the way we've felt before. When we make a choice and do something differently, we are voting for who we want to become instead of running a default emotional pattern that feels comfortable and familiar. Have a wonderful weekend! Kathryn
May 6 · 5 min
Navigating the Unknown
Why do we expect ourselves to be experts at things we've never done before? I wish I knew. Yet so many of us hold us to a standard when doing or trying something new that we would never hold for someone else. Several friends have children who are graduating from high school this month. Navigating the unknown of what life looks like after their children leave is a source of mixed emotions. The joy of accomplishment and graduation contrasted with the realization that supporting this child through the K-12 educational process is over. If their leaving makes you an empty nester, you may simultaneously look forward to and dread what's next. You haven't done this before. Give yourself grace and allow yourself permission to feel all that you're feeling. You're navigating the unknown and you'll get through it.
May 1 · 5 min
The Season of Growth and Growing
When life changes are accelerating, we can feel completely overwhelmed. But living life by design instead of default, provides a clear direction. Yet we often feel like we have no control over what happens. That's a lie. We always have a choice (although we may not like the choice.) For those of us in our latter years of life (I will be forever young) time is more precious than ever. Where are you wasting time? What are you letting fear prevent you from doing? Whose opinion is more important to you than your own? Where are you advocating for you and the life you want. It may be news, but there's no perfect time, there's no there (when I get there, I'll be happy). The joy is in the ever evolving journey we call life. We need witnesses to our greatness and cheerleaders to help us stay the course. Reach out if your spirit is sagging. Admitting something isn't working or isn't what you want is the first step to changing. And, soon, you'll have my new book "The Challenge of Change" to guide you through the process of becoming who you were meant to be. Much love to you all - Kathryn
April 17 · 5 min
The Purpose of Pain
What is the purpose of pain? Pain lets us know that something is wrong or out of alignment. When we avoid pain, we actually prolong it. Of course experiencing pain is unpleasant but the only way out is to go through it. The biggest lie about pain is we believe it will go on forever and we may make choices based on that belief. In my experience, even the most profound pain lessens after three days. I call it the "resurrection experience" . On the third day, you arise and realize the pain is dissipating. But if your pain is unrelenting, seek professional help. You don't need to navigate it alone.
April 10 · 5 min
Endings and Beginnings
Endings and beginnings are part of life. We can look forward to beginning something new - a job, a relationship, an adventure. But each beginning also means something is ending. And endings can be painful. We often try to avoid the grief that comes with endings. But you can't. It catches up with you one way or another and allowing yourself to feel the hurt helps you heal. I'm allowing myself to experience the sadness and loss of something very important in my life. And to know that something good will come of it.