You Are Not Broken

Kelly Casperson, MD

Welcome to the podcast that rewrites everything you thought you knew about sex, hormones, and midlife. I help women—and the people who love them—reconnect with their bodies, their minds, and their partners through science, mindset, and a whole lot of humor. Whether you’re navigating perimenopause, rediscovering desire, or just curious what’s possible, this show will remind you: you are not broken. (No medical advice here, just truth bombs and good conversation.)

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#395
Sunday · 1 hr 3 min
395. Numb, Addicted, or Replaced? Vibrator Myths Busted
Vibrator 101: Everything You Wanted to Know, But Were Too Embarrassed to Ask Use code "notbroken20" at elixirplay.com for 20% off Dr. Kelly Casperson explores vibrator basics through anatomy, blood flow, arousal, and pleasure. She discusses why sex education often misses important information about women’s bodies, reviews research on vibrator use, demonstrates different toy styles, and answers audience questions about squirting, pain, prolapse, and beginner-friendly options. The conversation emphasizes education over shame: understanding the clitoris, allowing time for arousal, and seeing vibrators as one possible tool for sexual wellbeing—not a replacement for a partner or a one-size-fits-all solution. Key topics How blood flow relates to genital arousal and sexual function The clitoris, the primary organ of orgasm for most women, and how it relates to the vagina How desire can be responsive and emerge during or after arousal Why arousal matters before penetration, particularly when pain or low hormones are involved The G spot as a sensitive area associated with clitoral anatomy Water-based, silicone-based, and oil-based lubricants Research on vibrator use and sexual function, satisfaction, and pelvic health Kelly’s HEAL framework: hormones, education, arousal and vibration, and lube and moisturizers Different vibrator styles and considerations when choosing one Myths about numbness, replacing partners, or becoming “addicted” to vibrators Audience questions about squirting, prolapse, clitoral hood fusion, pain after orgasm, and antidepressants As always, this podcast is for educational purposes and is not a substitute for individualized medical advice — talk to your own doctor about your own health. Subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who needs it. 🎙️ You Are Not Broken is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and wherever you listen. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Take my ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Adult Sex Ed Master Class:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠My Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Interested in my sexual health and hormone clinic? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Clinic is Open Listen to this podcast on Pinnacle to earn CME Thanks to our sponsor: Addyi, the little pink pill. To find out if Addyi is right for you, go to addyi.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for a $10 telemedicine appointment.And great news: with commercial insurance coverage Addyi is as little as $20 a month! Visit Addyi.com/notbroken. Eligible patients only. Restrictions apply. See Full Prescribing Information including Boxed Warning at addyi.com/pi This episode is sponsored by Joi and Blokes. If you’ve been wondering whether hormones could be playing a role in how you feel, Joi and Blokes can help you get answers. Start with comprehensive lab testing, then work with a licensed clinician to understand your results and discuss treatment options that may be right for you. Visit JoiAndBlokes.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for 65% off labs and 20% off treatment. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
#394
October 25 · 1 hr 2 min
394. Testicular Pain and Stage 4 Breast Cancer
Episode 394 – Dr. Susan MacDonald on Testicular Pain, Pelvic Floor Dysfunction, and Rebuilding Life After Stage 4 Breast Cancer Normal scan. Normal labs. Still in pain. Now what? Dr. Casperson is joined by fellow urologist Dr. Susan MacDonald for a conversation that starts with male pelvic pain and ends somewhere much more personal. They discuss why men with testicular pain are so often dismissed, how chronic pain gets mislabeled, and why pelvic floor dysfunction and referred pain get missed again and again. Then Dr. MacDonald shares her own story. She was diagnosed with de novo stage 4 bilateral breast cancer after missing her own early symptoms, and she describes what it's like to go from surgeon to patient. She talks openly about fatigue, grief, hormonal changes, and the career pivot she never chose. She also explains why she now wants to help patients move beyond survival mode toward resilience and joy. In this episode: How Dr. MacDonald found urology by accident (Grand Rounds, free pizza, and the realization that it's a surgical specialty) Why male reconstruction and urethroplasty won her over What urethral strictures are, and why tissue from inside the cheek is used to repair them How common testicular and pelvic pain is. She estimates about 5% of urology consults. Why chronic pain is harder to treat than a kidney stone, and why normal imaging doesn't mean the pain isn't real The harm of forcing a diagnosis, and patients carrying "heavy bricks in a backpack" of labels Thinking through a differential diagnosis out loud, with the patient as a partner Placebo effects, and why antibiotics can seem to help even when infection isn't the cause Pelvic floor dysfunction as the missing center of the Venn diagram, and the value of working with pelvic floor physical therapists Her stage 4 breast cancer diagnosis, and how surgeons are trained to ignore their own bodies Living through treatment: fatigue, insomnia, arthritis, hormonal changes, and grief Why leaving full-time academic surgery was forced, not voluntary, and her pivot into video education and speaking Sex after cancer, and why the messaging for men and women is so different Tart cherry juice and hot flashes Dr. MacDonald Linked In As always, this podcast is for educational purposes and is not a substitute for individualized medical advice — talk to your own doctor about your own health. Subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who needs it. 🎙️ You Are Not Broken is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and wherever you listen. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Take my ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Adult Sex Ed Master Class:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠My Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Interested in my sexual health and hormone clinic? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Clinic is Open Listen to this podcast on Pinnacle to earn CME Thanks to our sponsor: Addyi, the little pink pill. To find out if Addyi is right for you, go to addyi.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for a $10 telemedicine appointment.And great news: with commercial insurance coverage Addyi is as little as $20 a month! Visit Addyi.com/notbroken. Eligible patients only. Restrictions apply. See Full Prescribing Information including Boxed Warning at addyi.com/pi This episode is sponsored by Joi and Blokes. If you’ve been wondering whether hormones could be playing a role in how you feel, Joi and Blokes can help you get answers. Start with comprehensive lab testing, then work with a licensed clinician to understand your results and discuss treatment options that may be right for you. Visit JoiAndBlokes.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for 65% off labs and 20% off treatment. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
#393
October 18 · 1 hr 25 min
393. Stronger in Midlife: Muscle, Hormones, and Longevity for Women
Dr. Casperson is joined by Dr. Rebbecca Hertel, DO, MSCP, for a candid conversation about getting stronger through perimenopause and beyond. They talk about how hormonal shifts change training, recovery, and body composition. They also cover why bone health deserves your attention now, and how to read research and lab results with a critical eye. Along the way, Dr. Hertel explains what osteopathic medicine actually is. She also shares why your pain might not be coming from where you feel it. The two dig into protein, GLP-1s, testosterone, and hormone therapy, and why finding a clinician who listens matters as much as any prescription. In this episode: What osteopathic medicine and osteopathic manipulative treatment (OMT) involve Why pain can show up somewhere other than its source How perimenopause affects muscle, recovery, sleep, and body composition Why gaining muscle in midlife takes longer, and why it's still worth it Bone health, fracture prevention, and the case for resistance training Protein, hydration, and fueling your body during weight loss GLP-1 medications and strategies to help preserve muscle Hormone approaches in perimenopause and postmenopause Why hormone therapy is not contraception Testosterone: symptoms, side effects, and how to think about lab results Health span, independence, and prevention across the lifespan Hormone stigma and the need for better education at puberty, postpartum, and midlife Dr. Hertel's IG Dr Hertel's Website As always, this podcast is for educational purposes and is not a substitute for individualized medical advice — talk to your own doctor about your own health. Subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who needs it. 🎙️ You Are Not Broken is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and wherever you listen. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Take my ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Adult Sex Ed Master Class:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠My Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Interested in my sexual health and hormone clinic? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Clinic is Open Listen to this podcast on Pinnacle to earn CME Thanks to our sponsor: Addyi, the little pink pill. To find out if Addyi is right for you, go to addyi.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for a $10 telemedicine appointment.And great news: with commercial insurance coverage Addyi is as little as $20 a month! Visit Addyi.com/notbroken. Eligible patients only. Restrictions apply. See Full Prescribing Information including Boxed Warning at addyi.com/pi This episode is sponsored by Joi and Blokes. If you’ve been wondering whether hormones could be playing a role in how you feel, Joi and Blokes can help you get answers. Start with comprehensive lab testing, then work with a licensed clinician to understand your results and discuss treatment options that may be right for you. Visit JoiAndBlokes.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for 65% off labs and 20% off treatment. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
#392
October 11 · 49 min
392. When in Menopause: Advocacy, Policy, and the Power of Speaking Up
Episode 392 – When in Menopause: Advocacy, Policy, and the Power of Speaking Up Who gets to be a menopause advocate? You do. You probably already are. Dr. Casperson sits down with Jennifer Weiss-Wolf, a lawyer, women's leadership leader at NYU Law, and author of When in Menopause: A User's Manual and Citizen's Guide. Jennifer helped drive the fast, bipartisan wins in period policy. Now she's applying those lessons to menopause, and she's honest about why this one is harder. They cover where the policy wins are coming from, what still blocks progress, and why workplace perks miss the point. They also talk about why the real work is bigger than any one issue. If you're a clinician, an advocate, or just someone who wants to make change without a big platform, this one is for you. In this episode: How Jennifer moved from menstruation policy to menopause around 2020. It started with a friend's question about the policy landscape, not with her own symptoms. Advocacy as a choose-your-own-adventure. Legislative language, storytelling, and community-building all count. What period policy taught her about state-level wins and working across the aisle. Why menopause reform is more complicated than it looks. Decades of neglected science and deeply interconnected issues make it hard. She describes the field as organic rather than fractured. Language, stigma, and culture. How do you change policy when people still can't say "vagina" in public or on social media? Why most workplace accommodations fall short. Many are too small, too generic, or built on a weak understanding of menopause. Protections also have to come before anyone asks employees to disclose. The legal gap. The U.S. has no clear anti-discrimination protection for menopause. The ADA, pregnancy protections, and age-discrimination law help in some cases, but they leave holes. What actually moves the needle: access, research funding, clinician education and training, and reimbursement reform. Business leaders should fund these upstream fixes instead of offering superficial perks. Clinicians already have a platform. Patient visits, office materials, and staff handouts all spread accurate information, and small repeated messages add up. Community is the engine. Jennifer's examples include gyms, book clubs, schools, libraries, and PTAs. Midlife women are an underestimated political and social force. Jennifer's IG Jennifer's New Book As always, this podcast is for educational purposes and is not a substitute for individualized medical advice — talk to your own doctor about your own health. Subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who needs it. 🎙️ You Are Not Broken is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and wherever you listen. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Take my ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Adult Sex Ed Master Class:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠My Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Interested in my sexual health and hormone clinic? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Clinic is Open Listen to this podcast on Pinnacle to earn CME Thanks to our sponsor: Addyi, the little pink pill. To find out if Addyi is right for you, go to addyi.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for a $10 telemedicine appointment.And great news: with commercial insurance coverage Addyi is as little as $20 a month! Visit Addyi.com/notbroken. Eligible patients only. Restrictions apply. See Full Prescribing Information including Boxed Warning at addyi.com/pi This episode is sponsored by Joi and Blokes. If you’ve been wondering whether hormones could be playing a role in how you feel, Joi and Blokes can help you get answers. Start with comprehensive lab testing, then work with a licensed clinician to understand your results and discuss treatment options that may be right for you. Visit JoiAndBlokes.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for 65% off labs and 20% off treatment. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
#391
October 4 · 38 min
391. Say It Out Loud: PCOS Gets a New Name, PMDD Gets Real, and Your Ovaries Deserve Better
Dr. Sameena Rahman on menopause, PMDD, PCOS, and why naming things matters This week I sat down with practicing gynecologist Dr. Sameena Rahman to talk about some of the most misunderstood areas in women's health: hormone replacement after oophorectomy, PMDD, and the recent renaming of PCOS. We move fast from clinical nuance to culture, stigma, and medical bias, and you'll walk away with plenty of practical takeaways whether you're a patient or a clinician. Sameena also shares the story behind her book, Brown Girls Disease, and why she's reclaiming language around pain, shame, and access to care. In this episode, we talk about: Why women who have their ovaries removed need full hormone replacement, not just a low-dose patch The difference between menopause management and medical neglect after hysterectomy or oophorectomy The evidence that early menopause plus hormone therapy can have major survival benefits What PMDD is, how it differs from typical PMS, and why it can feel like "Jekyll and Hyde" every month Why PMDD may be more about hormone sensitivity and brain receptor interactions than progesterone alone PMDD treatment options, including SSRIs, specific birth control formulations, progesterone, and in extreme cases medical suppression Why the old label PCOS creates stigma and hides the cardiometabolic risk behind the syndrome The new name, polyendocrine metabolic ovarian syndrome, and why I think the rename could finally bring primary care and internal medicine into the conversation How PCOS affects fertility, diabetes risk, heart health, weight gain, and endometrial cancer risk How pelvic pain, vaginismus, and sexual dysfunction are shaped by culture, religion, and medical bias Why Sameena chose the title Brown Girls Disease as a way of reclaiming a term that had been used dismissively How language changes care, from saying "vagina" out loud to replacing shame-based terms with clearer ones Naming things matters. You are not broken. Dr. Rahman's IG As always, this podcast is for educational purposes and is not a substitute for individualized medical advice — talk to your own doctor about your own health. Subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who needs it. 🎙️ You Are Not Broken is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and wherever you listen. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Take my ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Adult Sex Ed Master Class:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠My Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Interested in my sexual health and hormone clinic? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Clinic is Open Listen to this podcast on Pinnacle to earn CME Thanks to our sponsor: Addyi, the little pink pill. To find out if Addyi is right for you, go to addyi.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for a $10 telemedicine appointment.And great news: with commercial insurance coverage Addyi is as little as $20 a month! Visit Addyi.com/notbroken. Eligible patients only. Restrictions apply. See Full Prescribing Information including Boxed Warning at addyi.com/pi This episode is sponsored by Joi and Blokes. If you’ve been wondering whether hormones could be playing a role in how you feel, Joi and Blokes can help you get answers. Start with comprehensive lab testing, then work with a licensed clinician to understand your results and discuss treatment options that may be right for you. Visit JoiAndBlokes.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for 65% off labs and 20% off treatment. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
#390
September 27 · 47 min
390. Vulvar Dermatology, Red Angry Vulvas, and Why Exams Matter
In this episode, I sit down with Dr. Melissa Mauskar, a vulvar dermatologist at UT Southwestern, for a wide-ranging conversation about vulvar skin conditions, common misdiagnoses, and why so many patients are told to just "wait and see" when they actually need an exam. We dig into GSM, estrogen, OTC yeast treatments, soaps, waxing, and the biggest myths that keep women from getting real care. If you've ever been told itching, burning, or irritation is "normal," this conversation explains why that advice can delay diagnosis for years, and what to do instead. What We Cover What vulvar dermatology is, and why the vulva deserves the same care as skin anywhere else on the body Why so many patients see 5 or 6 clinicians before getting the right diagnosis, often because no one ever actually examined the vulva How symptoms get mislabeled as yeast when the real culprit is lichen sclerosus, psoriasis, eczema, contact dermatitis, or GSM Why numbing products like Vagisil (and benzocaine specifically) can become irritants or allergens that make things worse Barrier care for "red angry vulva," including zinc oxide for irritation and moisture-related skin breakdown How overcleaning, douching, and scented washes disrupt the vulvar microbiome — and the shame baked into that marketing Waxing, microtrauma, and hair as a protective barrier GSM, recurrent UTIs, and why vaginal estrogen is still so underprescribed Late diagnosis of vulvar melanoma, and why genital skin needs to be looked at, not just talked about over telehealth Notable Quotes "My five year old can say vulva." "I really like talking about uncomfortable things and making comfortable people uncomfortable." "Just do what brings you joy." About Dr. Melissa Mauskar Dr. Melissa Mauskar is an Associate Professor of Dermatology and of Obstetrics and Gynecology at UT Southwestern Medical Center, where she's the founder and Director of the Vulvar Health Program — a tertiary referral center for gynecologists, dermatologists, and primary care physicians across Texas and the nation. She's a Fellow of the International Society for the Study of Vulvovaginal Diseases (ISSVD), founding president of the Vulvar Dermatoses Research Consortium, and serves on the board of the Women's Dermatologic Society. Learn more at utswmed.org/doctors/melissa-mauskar. As always, this podcast is for educational purposes and is not a substitute for individualized medical advice — talk to your own doctor about your own health. Subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who needs it. 🎙️ You Are Not Broken is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and wherever you listen. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Take my ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Adult Sex Ed Master Class:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠My Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Interested in my sexual health and hormone clinic? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Waitlist is open⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Thanks to our sponsor: Addyi, the little pink pill. To find out if Addyi is right for you, go to addyi.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for a $10 telemedicine appointment.And great news: with commercial insurance coverage Addyi is as little as $20 a month! Visit Addyi.com/notbroken. Eligible patients only. Restrictions apply. See Full Prescribing Information including Boxed Warning at addyi.com/pi This episode is sponsored by Joi and Blokes. If you’ve been wondering whether hormones could be playing a role in how you feel, Joi and Blokes can help you get answers. Start with comprehensive lab testing, then work with a licensed clinician to understand your results and discuss treatment options that may be right for you. Visit JoiAndBlokes.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for 65% off labs and 20% off treatment. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
#389
September 20 · 1 hr
389. Vaginal Estrogen and DHEA: What Works, Who It Helps, and Why the Myths Need to Die
In this episode, I walk through the basics of vaginal estrogen and vaginal DHEA for genitourinary syndrome of menopause, recurrent UTIs, painful sex, urinary urgency, and vulvar tissue changes. I also answer audience questions throughout, covering safety after breast cancer, use alongside systemic HRT, dosing, formulations, and what to do when symptoms don't improve. This one's for clinicians and the general public alike, the focus is correcting misinformation, improving access, and helping people understand that low hormones can affect the pelvis long before or long after menopause. What We Cover What genitourinary syndrome of menopause (GSM) actually means, and why it replaced older terms like vaginal atrophy The full range of GSM symptoms — urinary urgency, recurrent UTIs, bladder leakage, pain with sex, dryness, tissue thinning — as one unifying hormone-related syndrome Why GSM is so common (roughly 50–90% of women at or after menopause) and can start in perimenopause, during breastfeeding, on oral birth control, or after cancer treatment Data showing vaginal estrogen can reduce recurrent UTIs by about 50%, plus a large database study linking vaginal estrogen use to lower hospitalization, ICU admission, and sepsis-related death in women with recurrent UTIs Why "too old for vaginal estrogen" is a myth, and why age alone is never a reason to deny it Safety after breast cancer — why the evidence supports vaginal estrogen for many survivors, and why "zombie myths" keep resurfacing anyway The difference between systemic and local hormone therapy, and why some people need both Creams vs. tablets vs. rings vs. vaginal DHEA — and why DHEA can be especially useful for reversing established atrophy (it converts to both estrogen and testosterone) Practical stuff: burning, discharge, application technique, dosing frequency, and when it's time for a pelvic exam instead of another product Using vaginal estrogen alongside clobetasol for lichen sclerosus, and alongside systemic estrogen or testosterone when appropriate Notable Quotes "The third pillar of academia is to communicate the research, to communicate the knowledge to the general population." "There is not an age your driver's license tells you if you're too young or too old for vaginal estrogen." "If atrophy happens because of low hormones and you add hormones back, you can reverse atrophy." Key Frameworks GSM as the unifying diagnosis for urinary, sexual, and vulvovaginal symptoms Local hormone therapy vs. systemic hormone therapy Prevention vs. symptom treatment "Zombie myths" — outdated beliefs that keep resurfacing despite the evidence Want to join me live for these? Get on my email list so you don't miss the next one. As always, this podcast is for educational purposes and is not a substitute for individualized medical advice — talk to your own doctor about your own health. Subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who needs it. 🎙️ You Are Not Broken is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and wherever you listen. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Take my ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Adult Sex Ed Master Class:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠My Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Interested in my sexual health and hormone clinic? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Waitlist is open⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Thanks to our sponsor: Addyi, the little pink pill. To find out if Addyi is right for you, go to addyi.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for a $10 telemedicine appointment.And great news: with commercial insurance coverage Addyi is as little as $20 a month! Visit Addyi.com/notbroken. Eligible patients only. Restrictions apply. See Full Prescribing Information including Boxed Warning at addyi.com/pi This episode is sponsored by Joi and Blokes. If you’ve been wondering whether hormones could be playing a role in how you feel, Joi and Blokes can help you get answers. Start with comprehensive lab testing, then work with a licensed clinician to understand your results and discuss treatment options that may be right for you. Visit JoiAndBlokes.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for 65% off labs and 20% off treatment. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
#388
September 13 · 37 min
388. Sexuality is How You Exist in the World - with Dr. Lexx
In this episode, I talk with Dr. Lexx about how to have honest conversations about sex with kids, why sexual shame still shapes adult relationships, and how to think more clearly about desire, consent, and pleasure. We dig into misinformation around sex education, sex as a form of power, and what healthy support can look like from educators, counselors, and therapists. What We Cover Sex-positive parenting and how to talk to kids about bodies and boundaries Why sexuality education in the U.S. is more restricted than people think — and why "medically accurate" isn't a given The real difference between sex educators, sex counselors, and sex therapists How midlife, menopause, and shifting desire reshape relationships Practical ways to rebuild intimacy and connection when the spark fades Key Frameworks Personal parts — Language that reduces shame and emphasizes ownership over the body. Unwanted touch / secret touch — Clearer safety language than "good touch, bad touch." Sexuality as a whole-life concept — Not just intercourse, but identity, embodiment, relationships, and power. Compersion — Feeling happy for a partner's pleasure or joy, even if it isn't personally relevant. Sensate focus — Purposeful nonsexual touch used to rebuild connection and learn what feels good. Consent first — The baseline for everything, including fantasy, touch, and negotiation. About Dr. Lexx Dr. Lexx (Lexx, The Sex Doc) is a sex therapist, educator, and speaker whose work centers healing, pleasure, and connection — with a particular focus on Black, Brown, and queer communities often left out of traditional therapy spaces. Learn more at lexxsexdoc.com. https://lexxsexdoc.com/ Subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who needs it. 🎙️ You Are Not Broken is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and wherever you listen. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Take my ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Adult Sex Ed Master Class:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠My Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Interested in my sexual health and hormone clinic? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Waitlist is open⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Thanks to our sponsor: Addyi, the little pink pill. To find out if Addyi is right for you, go to addyi.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for a $10 telemedicine appointment.And great news: with commercial insurance coverage Addyi is as little as $20 a month! Visit Addyi.com/notbroken. Eligible patients only. Restrictions apply. See Full Prescribing Information including Boxed Warning at addyi.com/pi This episode is sponsored by Joi and Blokes. If you’ve been wondering whether hormones could be playing a role in how you feel, Joi and Blokes can help you get answers. Start with comprehensive lab testing, then work with a licensed clinician to understand your results and discuss treatment options that may be right for you. Visit JoiAndBlokes.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for 65% off labs and 20% off treatment. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
#387
September 6 · 56 min
387. Beyond the Prescription with Dr. McBride
In this episode 387, I sit down with Dr. Lucy McBride to talk about the widening gap between the traditional medical system and the wellness industry, and how patients can find solid ground in between. Lucy makes the case for evidence-based advice, realistic expectations, and actually engaging with your healthcare system instead of trying to DIY your way to health. What We Cover The gap between the medical system and the wellness industry Why evidence-based health advice matters more than ever The risks of wellness products and influencers overpromising certainty How patients can better engage with (not opt out of) the healthcare system Supplements, vitamins, and gadgets — what's worth your money and what isn't The wellness industry often overpromises certainty and results it can't back up. Living in the "middle ground" means engaging with the healthcare system effectively rather than avoiding it. Dr. McBride's book, Beyond the Prescription, is a practical guide for navigating health choices. About Dr. Lucy McBride Dr. Lucy McBride is a practicing internist and the author of Beyond the Prescription: How to Contextualize Your Health and Break Free from a Lifetime of Fatigue, Anxiety, and Stress. Grab her book here: Beyond the Prescription https://www.lucymcbride.com/ https://www.instagram.com/drlucymcbride/ Substack As always, this podcast is for educational purposes and is not a substitute for individualized medical advice — talk to your own doctor about your own health. Subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who needs it. 🎙️ You Are Not Broken is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and wherever you listen. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Take my ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Adult Sex Ed Master Class:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠My Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Interested in my sexual health and hormone clinic? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Waitlist is open⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Thanks to our sponsor: Addyi, the little pink pill. To find out if Addyi is right for you, go to addyi.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for a $10 telemedicine appointment.And great news: with commercial insurance coverage Addyi is as little as $20 a month! Visit Addyi.com/notbroken. Eligible patients only. Restrictions apply. See Full Prescribing Information including Boxed Warning at addyi.com/pi This episode is sponsored by Joi and Blokes. If you’ve been wondering whether hormones could be playing a role in how you feel, Joi and Blokes can help you get answers. Start with comprehensive lab testing, then work with a licensed clinician to understand your results and discuss treatment options that may be right for you. Visit JoiAndBlokes.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for 65% off labs and 20% off treatment. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
#386
August 30 · 48 min
386. Nuances and Myths of Menopause with Dr. Shepherd
The longer we treat menopause as something to survive quietly instead of understanding fully, the more women get left without real answers. Dr. Shepherd is an OB-GYN, and we use menopause as the entry point into a much bigger conversation — the myths still circulating about menopause and sexual health, why clinician expertise and actual hands-on experience matter more than a lot of people realize, and how insurance and the broader healthcare system quietly shape what choices women even know they have. We also get into AI and new technology in medicine — where it genuinely helps, and where it's moving faster than anyone can vet it. And we land on something I keep coming back to on this show: aging well is not a solo project. Community and connection are part of the medicine. Dr. Jessica Shepherd is a board-certified OB-GYN focused on women's health, menopause, and sexual wellness in midlife. Generation M - Dr. Jessica Shepherd's book What We Cover Menopause as a gateway. Why menopause is so often the first time women start really engaging with their own health, and what that says about the gaps earlier in the system. The myths that won't die. Common misconceptions about menopause and sexual health that Dr. Shepherd still has to correct in the exam room, every week. Expertise actually matters. Why the clinician you choose, and how much hands-on experience they have, changes the quality of care you get, especially in a field this nuanced. The system shapes the choice. How insurance coverage and healthcare structures quietly limit what options get presented to women in the first place. AI in medicine — promise and risk. Where artificial intelligence and new technology are genuinely useful in healthcare, and where the pace of change is outrunning oversight. Community as medicine. Why connection and support are not a "nice to have" in aging well, they're part of the actual strategy. Thanks to our sponsor: Addyi, the little pink pill. To find out if Addyi is right for you, go to addyi.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for a $10 telemedicine appointment.And great news: with commercial insurance coverage Addyi is as little as $20 a month! Visit Addyi.com/notbroken. Eligible patients only. Restrictions apply. See Full Prescribing Information including Boxed Warning at addyi.com/pi Thanks to our sponsor ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Midi Women's Health⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Designed by midlife experts, delivered by experienced clinicians, covered by insurance.Midi is the first virtual care clinic made exclusively for women 40+. Evidence-based treatments. Personalized midlife care. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.joinmidi.com⁠ See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
#385
August 23 · 50 min
385. 500k on IG Celebration - Ask Me Anything
Half a million of you on Instagram. I still can't quite get over that number. To celebrate, this episode is all you — an open Ask Me Anything where I answer the questions you've actually been sending me. No guest, no agenda, just me working through your real questions about hormones, menopause, sexual health, and the stuff nobody explains to you in a normal doctor's appointment. We cover a lot of ground — how I ended up a urologist obsessed with female sexual health in the first place, the myths about hormone therapy I am still correcting in 2026, DHEA, the estrogen patch shortage, why your labs don't always tell the whole story, and yes, the Ferrari engine analogy makes another appearance. If you've been wondering something and never had the nerve to ask your own doctor — there's a good chance I answer it here. In This Episode How I got here. My background as a urologist and how that path led me into female sexual health — a specialty most people don't expect a urologist to end up in. Hormones, menopause, and aging. Why hormones matter so much more than most of us were taught, and what's actually happening in your body during the menopause transition. Hormone therapy myths, corrected. I'm clearing up the misinformation that's still floating around about HRT — including specific questions on risk for women with a Factor V (Factor two) clotting diagnosis. DHEA and vaginal estrogen. What they do, why the estrogen patch shortage is happening, and what to switch to (gels, oral options) in the meantime. Testosterone, decoded. Comparing creams versus injections, how to interpret SHBG, and why I care more about how you feel than what the lab printout says. Progesterone tolerance. What to do when the standard dose doesn't agree with you, and where extended-release formulations fit in. Persistent UTIs on vaginal estrogen. Why they still happen even when you're doing everything "right," and what else might be going on. Weight gain and menopause. What the data actually says — and what gets blamed on hormones that isn't really about hormones at all. Talking about sex — with clients, with partners. A layered, step-by-step way to open the conversation about low libido without it feeling like a confrontation. Individualized care. Why hormone management should never be one-size-fits-all, and how I think about lab testing versus symptoms. What's next. vulvar DHEA, book clubs, and more ways to keep learning together. Subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who needs it. 🎙️ You Are Not Broken is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and wherever you listen. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Take my ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Adult Sex Ed Master Class:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠My Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Interested in my sexual health and hormone clinic? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Waitlist is open⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Thanks to our sponsor: Addyi, the little pink pill. To find out if Addyi is right for you, go to addyi.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for a $10 telemedicine appointment.And great news: with commercial insurance coverage Addyi is as little as $20 a month! Visit Addyi.com/notbroken. Eligible patients only. Restrictions apply. See Full Prescribing Information including Boxed Warning at addyi.com/pi Thanks to our sponsor ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Midi Women's Health⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Designed by midlife experts, delivered by experienced clinicians, covered by insurance.Midi is the first virtual care clinic made exclusively for women 40+. Evidence-based treatments. Personalized midlife care. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.joinmidi.com⁠ See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
#384
August 16 · 44 min
384. The Myth of Aging with Dr. Gilberg
Age is just a number. We say it all the time. Do we actually believe it? This week I sit down with Dr. Arnold Gilberg, MD, PhD — a psychiatrist with over 60 years of clinical experience and author of The Myth of Aging. Sixty years. Let that sink in for a second. He has watched mental health care go from something people hid to something people post about. And he has spent just as long studying what actually keeps people vital as they get older, and it is not what most of us assume. We get into what a psychiatrist actually is (and how that's different from a psychologist or a therapist), why the shame around therapy has mostly disappeared since the 1960s but hasn't fully left medicine itself, and why he'd argue we're over-medicating a problem that often needs connection more than a prescription. Then we go somewhere I did not expect, his own path to becoming a rabbi, and what spirituality has taught him about the mind that medicine alone couldn't. If you've ever felt "stuck," or assumed decline was just the deal you signed up for by getting older — this one's for you. Dr. Arnold Gilberg, MD, PhD, is a psychiatrist with more than six decades of clinical experience and the author of The Myth of Aging. Over the course of his career he has treated patients through massive shifts in how our culture understands mental health — from the stigma of the mid-20th century to today's very different, more open landscape. He is also a rabbi, a path that grew out of his clinical work and shapes how he thinks about meaning, purpose, and healing. The Myth of Aging book What We Cover Psychiatry vs. psychology vs. therapy. What a psychiatrist actually does, how that role differs from a psychologist or therapist, and why the lines have blurred (and shifted) as the field has evolved. From shame to normal. How therapy went from something you hid to something you casually mention at dinner — and why stigma still lingers inside the medical community itself, even as it's faded in the culture at large. The culture of medication. Dr. Gilbert doesn't hold back on this one — the over-reliance on medication, what gets missed when a prescription replaces psychotherapy, and why informed consent about side effects matters more than most patients realize. Body and mind are not separate systems. Why physical activity is one of the most underused tools in mental health care, and how movement changes the brain, not just the body. Becoming a rabbi. Dr. Gilbert's own journey into spirituality, and how faith and religion show up as legitimate tools for emotional and mental well-being — not as an alternative to psychiatry, but alongside it. Cultural shifts, real clinical impact. How broader acceptance of diverse sexualities and identities has changed what shows up in the therapy room and how mental health providers practice. Connection is the treatment. Why trust between patient and therapist predicts outcomes more than technique — and what that means for how we should be evaluating "good" therapy. The myth of aging, dismantled. Aging does not have to mean decline. Investment in physical, mental, and social health changes the trajectory — and it's never too late to start. Midlife crisis, reframed. What's actually happening during a midlife crisis, and why it can be the opening for real change instead of just a cliché to laugh off. Mindset changes your biology. The Harvard research on mindset and lifespan — and what it tells us about how much of "aging" is happening in our heads before it happens in our bodies. Getting unstuck. Practical ways to turn a feeling of stagnation into an actual growth opportunity. Community, movement, purpose. The three pillars Dr. Gilbert keeps coming back to for aging well — and why none of them are optional. Subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who needs it. 🎙️ You Are Not Broken is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and wherever you listen. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Take my ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Adult Sex Ed Master Class:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠My Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Interested in my sexual health and hormone clinic? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Waitlist is open⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Thanks to our sponsor: Addyi, the little pink pill. To find out if Addyi is right for you, go to addyi.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for a $10 telemedicine appointment.And great news: with commercial insurance coverage Addyi is as little as $20 a month! Visit Addyi.com/notbroken. Eligible patients only. Restrictions apply. See Full Prescribing Information including Boxed Warning at addyi.com/pi Thanks to our sponsor ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Midi Women's Health⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Designed by midlife experts, delivered by experienced clinicians, covered by insurance.Midi is the first virtual care clinic made exclusively for women 40+. Evidence-based treatments. Personalized midlife care. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.joinmidi.com⁠ See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
#383
August 9 · 58 min
383. Burning Up, Frozen Out — Men, Menopause, and the Midlife Marriage
Menopause conversations center on women. For good reason. But what about the guy standing next to her? Joe Warner and Rob Kemp wrote Burning Up, Frozen Out — the first real guide to perimenopause written for men. Not about fixing her. About understanding what's happening and showing up anyway. We talk about why men are so in the dark on this. What actually helps versus what just feels helpful. And why this works better as a team sport. In this episode: The stereotypes that make menopause a no-go topic at home Why communication breaks down exactly when you need it most Small, low-effort ways men can actually support their partner Men have their own midlife hormonal shifts too — sleep, stress, food, fitness Why "support" means listening, not solving Burning Up, Frozen Out book Website Subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who needs it. 🎙️ You Are Not Broken is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and wherever you listen. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Take my ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Adult Sex Ed Master Class:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠My Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Interested in my sexual health and hormone clinic? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Waitlist is open⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Thanks to our sponsor: Addyi, the little pink pill. To find out if Addyi is right for you, go to addyi.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for a $10 telemedicine appointment.And great news: with commercial insurance coverage Addyi is as little as $20 a month! Visit Addyi.com/notbroken. Eligible patients only. Restrictions apply. See Full Prescribing Information including Boxed Warning at addyi.com/pi Thanks to our sponsor ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Midi Women's Health⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Designed by midlife experts, delivered by experienced clinicians, covered by insurance.Midi is the first virtual care clinic made exclusively for women 40+. Evidence-based treatments. Personalized midlife care. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.joinmidi.com⁠ See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
#382
August 2 · 1 hr 16 min
382. Men, Menopause, and the Relationships in Between
Menopause doesn't just happen to a body, it happens to a relationship. In this episode, Traver Boehm joins Dr. Kelly Casperson to talk about what's actually going on hormonally during perimenopause and menopause, and what that means for the partners trying to understand it from the outside. Kelly breaks down the real difference between perimenopause and menopause (hint: most people are using these words wrong), what's happening biologically during the transition, and why the emotional and relational fallout is often just as real as the hot flashes. Then the conversation turns to men — what's shifting for them hormonally during this same midlife window, and how couples can actually talk to each other about all of it instead of quietly drifting apart. This one's for the women in it and the partners trying to show up for them. In this episode: Perimenopause vs. menopause, where one ends and the other begins What hormonal changes are actually doing to mood, sleep, libido, and connection The emotional and relational ripple effects of menopause that no one prepares you for Hormonal shifts in men during midlife, and why this isn't just a "her" conversation How to actually talk to your partner about what's changing Rebuilding pleasure and intimacy when everything else is in flux Reminder: none of this is individual medical advice, discuss your own plan with your own clinician. https://www.manuncivilized.com/ https://www.instagram.com/traverboehm Subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who needs it. 🎙️ You Are Not Broken is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and wherever you listen. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Take my ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Adult Sex Ed Master Class:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠My Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Interested in my sexual health and hormone clinic? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Waitlist is open⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Thanks to our sponsor: Addyi, the little pink pill. To find out if Addyi is right for you, go to addyi.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for a $10 telemedicine appointment.And great news: with commercial insurance coverage Addyi is as little as $20 a month! Visit Addyi.com/notbroken. Eligible patients only. Restrictions apply. See Full Prescribing Information including Boxed Warning at addyi.com/pi Thanks to our sponsor ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Midi Women's Health⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Designed by midlife experts, delivered by experienced clinicians, covered by insurance.Midi is the first virtual care clinic made exclusively for women 40+. Evidence-based treatments. Personalized midlife care. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.joinmidi.com⁠ See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
#381
July 26 · 1 hr
381. Cancer, Sex and Hormones with Oncologist and Sex Therapist Dr. Bosserman
In this episode, Dr. Linda Bosserman shares her expertise on hormone therapy, addressing common misconceptions and highlighting the latest science supporting their safe use in women and men. Tune in to hear practical insights on hormone management, systemic and local applications, and how to advocate for your health. Key Topics Covered: The importance of precise language: specifying hormone types, routes, and doses The safety and efficacy of vaginal estrogen in women with breast cancer Debunking myths about hormones causing breast cancer: data from large studies The potential of testosterone in improving neurocognition, libido, and overall health in women The ongoing fight for FDA approval of female testosterone products The role of systemic hormones in preventing cardiovascular disease How to counsel patients on hormone-related recurrence risks The significance of personalized, evidence-based hormone therapy for optimal aging Insights from Dr. Bosserman's PhD in sex therapy and its relevance to sexual health The systemic biases and misinformation perpetuated by media and outdated guidelines Dr. Bosserman Menopausal Hormone Therapy after Breast Cancer Subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who needs it. 🎙️ You Are Not Broken is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and wherever you listen. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Take my ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Adult Sex Ed Master Class:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠My Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Interested in my sexual health and hormone clinic? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Waitlist is open⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Thanks to our sponsor: Addyi, the little pink pill. To find out if Addyi is right for you, go to addyi.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for a $10 telemedicine appointment.And great news: with commercial insurance coverage Addyi is as little as $20 a month! Visit Addyi.com/notbroken. Eligible patients only. Restrictions apply. See Full Prescribing Information including Boxed Warning at addyi.com/pi Thanks to our sponsor ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Midi Women's Health⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Designed by midlife experts, delivered by experienced clinicians, covered by insurance.Midi is the first virtual care clinic made exclusively for women 40+. Evidence-based treatments. Personalized midlife care. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.joinmidi.com⁠ See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
#380
July 19 · 45 min
380. The Final Word on Heated Rivalry - Welcome to the Cottage (episode 6)
We're closing out the season with something different: a multidisciplinary breakdown of episode six of Heated Rivalry. Not a recap. Not a fan theory session. A real conversation about what the show gets right — and what it gets wrong — about male performance anxiety, queer identity, female arousal physiology, and the stories we tell ourselves about our own bodies. To be clear: this isn't about hockey. It's about what happens when good storytelling accidentally becomes a teaching moment for sexual health. What We Cover Performance anxiety isn't in your head — it's in your nerves, arteries, and muscles. Erectile function is vascular and neurological before it's psychological. Medication, alcohol, dehydration, stress — all of it shows up in the body before it shows up in the bedroom. We break down why "just relax" is the least useful advice you can give a man who's struggling, and what's actually happening physiologically when performance doesn't match desire. Shane's coming out arc, and why identity evolution isn't linear. The show doesn't hand Shane a clean, tidy arc — and that's the point. We talk about how culture, family history, and internalized norms shape the timeline of coming out, and why real identity work rarely looks like the movie version. Communication is the actual plot device. Underneath the hockey, the drama, the trauma — the show works because the characters eventually say the thing. We talk about why authentic communication is the real special effect in any story about intimacy, on screen or off. Behind the scenes: setting, production choices, small details you'd miss on a first watch — and yes, a detour into tentacle erotica as a case study in how sexual expression keeps evolving in media, and why that's worth understanding rather than dismissing. Key Takeaways Erectile response is biological first, emotional second — treat it that way. Female arousal physiology doesn't disappear at menopause; it changes, and imaging confirms it. Coming out stories are shaped by context, not just courage. Good storytelling about sex requires vulnerability, not perfection. Expanding your sexual literacy — even through fiction — is part of the work. You are not broken. Your body isn't broken. And apparently, neither is prestige TV's ability to sneak real sex ed into a hockey drama. Season two, see you soon. — Kelly Subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who needs it. 🎙️ You Are Not Broken is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and wherever you listen. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Take my ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Adult Sex Ed Master Class:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠My Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Interested in my sexual health and hormone clinic? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Waitlist is open⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Thanks to our sponsor: Addyi, the little pink pill. To find out if Addyi is right for you, go to addyi.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for a $10 telemedicine appointment.And great news: with commercial insurance coverage Addyi is as little as $20 a month! Visit Addyi.com/notbroken. Eligible patients only. Restrictions apply. See Full Prescribing Information including Boxed Warning at addyi.com/pi Thanks to our sponsor ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Midi Women's Health⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Designed by midlife experts, delivered by experienced clinicians, covered by insurance.Midi is the first virtual care clinic made exclusively for women 40+. Evidence-based treatments. Personalized midlife care. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.joinmidi.com⁠ See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
#379
July 12 · 43 min
379. Heated Rivalry Episode 5
Join us for the season's final two episodes as we explore the emotional depths, relationships, and personal growth of the characters in "Heated Rivalry." This episode delves into vulnerability, identity, and love through intimate conversations and memorable scenes, offering both humor and heartache. We cover: The complexities of coming out and self-acceptance in a tight-knit community The influence of trauma and social pressures on sexual identity The portrayal of relationships, love, and chemistry on screen and in real life Medical insights into sexual health, including ED, menopause, and reproductive choices The cultural depiction of masculinity, femininity, and societal expectations In this episode: Analyzing the pivotal scene where Ilya reveals his inner turmoil about identity and family The significance of honesty and vulnerability between Shane and Ilya Insights into how trauma impacts sexual development and relationships The role of humor and playful banter in serious moments Behind-the-scenes stories from the filming, including location choices and character dynamics Discussing medical myths about genitals post-menopause based on MRI studies Conversations about contraception, fertility, and sexual pleasure in both fiction and real life Exploring the cultural intersections in the characters’ backgrounds, including Russian, Canadian, and American influences Subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who needs it. 🎙️ You Are Not Broken is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and wherever you listen. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Take my ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Adult Sex Ed Master Class:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠My Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Interested in my sexual health and hormone clinic? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Waitlist is open⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Thanks to our sponsor: Addyi, the little pink pill. To find out if Addyi is right for you, go to addyi.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for a $10 telemedicine appointment.And great news: with commercial insurance coverage Addyi is as little as $20 a month! Visit Addyi.com/notbroken. Eligible patients only. Restrictions apply. See Full Prescribing Information including Boxed Warning at addyi.com/pi Thanks to our sponsor ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Midi Women's Health⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Designed by midlife experts, delivered by experienced clinicians, covered by insurance.Midi is the first virtual care clinic made exclusively for women 40+. Evidence-based treatments. Personalized midlife care. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.joinmidi.com⁠ See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
#378
July 5 · 39 min
378. Heated Rivalry episode 4 - Frotting, Ferrets, and Ferris Wheels — Wait, Wrong Show. Just Frotting.
Episode 4: Rose and Rosé — The Maturation of Men Heated Rivalry Series | You Are Not Broken We're four episodes deep into "Heated Rivalry," and this is the one where the boys finally have to grow up. Episode 4 is a time jump — years compressed into a montage — and it's doing double duty. It's showing us Shane and Ilyia maturing into men who can actually be in a relationship, not just have sex in one. And it's showing us Rose figuring out who she is alongside them. Growth isn't linear for any of these characters, and honestly, that's the whole point. This episode has jokes, it has ginger ale, it has a Jean Paul Gaultier shirt doing more emotional labor than most people's therapists. And underneath all of it, we're talking about what it actually looks like when men — queer or straight — mature into partners instead of performers. In this episode, we cover: 🥂 The montage that does the heavy lifting — Years pass in minutes, and the show trusts you to read growth in glances instead of dialogue. We break down what that fast-forward is actually telling us about who these characters are becoming. 🥤 Ginger ale as a stand-in for honesty — A small, recurring detail that keeps showing up at exactly the moments authenticity matters. We talk about why the little symbols are doing more work than the big speeches. 🪜 Stairs as a metaphor for hiding — Where characters stand, physically, tells you where they stand emotionally. Comfort zones, identity, who's ready to be seen and who isn't yet. 🛏️ Lube, and the sex we don't usually see — We get specific about sexual practice and preference, because vague euphemism doesn't teach anybody anything. This is where the show earns its reputation for actually doing the work most media skips. ❤️ Gay male intimacy that exists outside the bedroom — Emotional depth, tenderness, and connection depicted as fully as the physical. We talk about why that matters for representation and why it's still rare. 👨‍👩‍👧 Family, maturity, and the weight of expectation — What it costs to grow up under the pressure of what your family, your sport, or your culture expects "a man" to look like. 🎬 Fashion, music, and cinematography as storytelling — Including a Jean Paul Gaultier shirt that says more about a character's confidence than a page of script could. 📱 Real-life echoes — Outed athletes, fan engagement, and how a fictional hockey romance keeps bumping into very real headlines about sexuality in professional sports. Maturity isn't about getting older. It's about getting honest — with yourself, with the people you love, and about the shape your desire actually takes. That's the throughline of this episode, and it's the throughline of everything we do here. You are not broken. Growing into who you actually are — sexually, emotionally, all of it — takes time. This episode is proof it's worth the wait. Subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who needs it. 🎙️ You Are Not Broken is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and wherever you listen. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Take my ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Adult Sex Ed Master Class:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠My Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Interested in my sexual health and hormone clinic? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Waitlist is open⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Thanks to our sponsor: Addyi, the little pink pill. To find out if Addyi is right for you, go to addyi.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for a $10 telemedicine appointment.And great news: with commercial insurance coverage Addyi is as little as $20 a month! Visit Addyi.com/notbroken. Eligible patients only. Restrictions apply. See Full Prescribing Information including Boxed Warning at addyi.com/pi Thanks to our sponsor ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Midi Women's Health⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Designed by midlife experts, delivered by experienced clinicians, covered by insurance.Midi is the first virtual care clinic made exclusively for women 40+. Evidence-based treatments. Personalized midlife care. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.joinmidi.com⁠ See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
June 28 · 41 min
377 - Heated Rivalry Episode 3-Love, Boundaries, and the Most Unhinged Uber Ride Story You've Ever Heard
You Are Not Broken | Episode 377 Join me, Dr. Rubin and Dr. Winter three episodes deep into "Heated Rivalry" and things are getting complicated. Emotionally. Relationally. And apparently, in real life too — because this episode went completely off-script in the best possible way. Episode 3 of the show gives us more Scott and Kip, more tension, more of the push-pull that makes this story so hard to look away from. And it gave us a lot to say. In this episode, we cover: 🏒 Full episode 3 breakdown — Plot, pacing, pivotal moments, and everything we were yelling at the screen about. We get into the emotional undercurrents the show is building and why this episode marks a turning point in how these characters relate to each other ❤️ Scott Hunter and Kip: love, limits, and the architecture of a complicated relationship — What does it look like when two people want each other and also can't quite figure out how to be with each other? We analyze the push-pull, the boundaries being tested, and what the show is trying to say about intimacy under pressure 🧠 Enneagram detour: typing the characters — Yes, we went there. Kip's dad especially warranted a full personality deep-dive. If you've ever wondered why certain relationship dynamics feel so stuck, the Enneagram conversation in this episode will make things click 🎬 Behind the scenes: budget, craft, and the acting choices that land (or don't) — We talk about what the production is clearly doing well, where the constraints show up on screen, and the moments where the actors did something genuinely impressive with the material they were given 🌟 A real Hollywood love story — One of us brought a personal story to this episode that mirrors some of what the show is exploring in ways that are almost too perfect. Love that finds you in unexpected places, at unexpected times, with unexpected people. 🚗 The porn star Uber ride story — We cannot explain this one. You just have to listen. It is real. It happened. It is relevant (sort of). And it is the most chaotic three minutes of content we have ever produced on this podcast. Why episode 3 matters: The first two episodes establish the attraction. Episode 3 is where the show starts asking harder questions — about what people owe each other, about the difference between wanting someone and being able to actually be with them, and about the family dynamics and personal histories that follow us into every relationship we try to build. That's not just good TV. That's the conversation we have in exam rooms, in therapy offices, and at 2am when we can't sleep. "Heated Rivalry" keeps giving us a way in to material that's genuinely difficult to talk about directly — and we're going to keep using it.Listen to my Tedx Talk: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Why we need adult sex ed⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Take my ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Adult Sex Ed Master Class:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠My Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Interested in my sexual health and hormone clinic? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Waitlist is open⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Thanks to our sponsor: Addyi, the little pink pill. To find out if Addyi is right for you, go to addyi.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for a $10 telemedicine appointment.And great news: with commercial insurance coverage Addyi is as little as $20 a month! Visit Addyi.com/notbroken.Eligible patients only. Restrictions apply. See Full Prescribing Information including Boxed Warning at addyi.com/pi To learn more about Via vaginal moisturizer from Solv Wellness, visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠via4her.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and get 20% off your first order. For an additional $5 off, use coupon code DRKELLY5. Clinicians can request patient materials or samples at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠hcp.solvwellness.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Thanks to our sponsor ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Midi Women's Health⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Designed by midlife experts, delivered by experienced clinicians, covered by insurance.Midi is the first virtual care clinic made exclusively for women 40+. Evidence-based treatments. Personalized midlife care.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.joinmidi.com⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
June 21 · 56 min
376. Heated Rivalry - Episode 2 — Four Urologists Walk Into a Hockey Romance
Episode 2 of "Heated Rivalry" gave us more heat, more emotional complexity, and — honestly — more to dissect than we could cover alone. So this time, I'm joined by three of my favorite urologist colleagues: Dr. Rubin, Dr. Winter, and Dr. Gonzalez. Four urologists, one hockey romance, zero filter. This is the kind of conversation that doesn't happen in medical school, at grand rounds, or really anywhere in organized medicine. Which is exactly why we're having it here. In this episode, we cover: 🏒 Safety, trust, and emotional vulnerability in gay relationships — Episode 2 goes deeper into what it actually takes to be intimate when you've spent years hiding who you are. We talk about what the show gets right about the psychological weight of that, and what it looks like clinically when shame is baked into someone's relationship with their own body and desire 📖 "Heated Rivalry" as curated sex education — Fiction is doing what formal sex ed refuses to do: showing people what communication, negotiation, and mutual pleasure actually look like. Four urologists weigh in on what we'd add, what we'd correct, and what we'd assign as required watching 🧠 The psychology of self-acceptance, shame, and queer connection — These characters aren't just physically attracted to each other — they're navigating decades of internalized messaging about who they're allowed to be. We break down what that does to intimacy and how it shows up in real patient conversations 🍑 Anal sex, condom use, and preferences — the actual clinical conversation — What do gay versus heterosexual contexts look like in practice? What does the data say about condom use patterns, and why? What do patients actually need to know that providers almost never tell them? We go there. 👁️ Objectification, authenticity, and the fantasy-versus-reality line in media — Is "Heated Rivalry" showing us something true, or something aspirational? Does it matter? How does idealized media representation shape real people's expectations of their own sex lives and bodies? 🛡️ Consent and communication as clinical skills — Not just ethics — actual skills. What does good sexual communication look like, and how does it translate across orientations? The show models some of this beautifully. We talk about what's transferable. 📱 How media shapes (and misshapes) LGBTQ+ sexual health literacy — The misinformation landscape around queer bodies and sexual health is genuinely harmful. We talk about what gets distorted, what's missing, and how pop culture can either close or widen that gap 🌈 What this show is doing for LGBTQ+ communities — Representation isn't just feel-good. It has measurable effects on shame reduction, help-seeking behavior, and sexual self-concept. We talk about the real-world ripple effects of seeing your experience on screen — done well The conversation you didn't know you needed: Four urologists sitting around breaking down a gay hockey romance sounds like the setup to a joke. But here's what's actually true: most of us received zero clinical training on LGBTQ+ sexual health. Most of our patients — gay, straight, bi, questioning — received zero accurate sex education about anal intimacy, queer relationships, or sexual communication. "Heated Rivalry" is filling a gap that medicine created. We think that's worth talking about seriously, with humor, and without shame.Listen to my Tedx Talk: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Why we need adult sex ed⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Take my ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Adult Sex Ed Master Class:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠My Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Interested in my sexual health and hormone clinic? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Waitlist is open⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Thanks to our sponsor: Addyi, the little pink pill. To find out if Addyi is right for you, go to addyi.com/notbroken and use code NOTBROKEN for a $10 telemedicine appointment.And great news: with commercial insurance coverage Addyi is as little as $20 a month! Visit Addyi.com/notbroken.Eligible patients only. Restrictions apply. See Full Prescribing Information including Boxed Warning at addyi.com/pi To learn more about Via vaginal moisturizer from Solv Wellness, visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠via4her.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and get 20% off your first order. For an additional $5 off, use coupon code DRKELLY5. Clinicians can request patient materials or samples at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠hcp.solvwellness.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Thanks to our sponsor ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Midi Women's Health⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Designed by midlife experts, delivered by experienced clinicians, covered by insurance.Midi is the first virtual care clinic made exclusively for women 40+. Evidence-based treatments. Personalized midlife care.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.joinmidi.com⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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