The Messy Parts

Mindy Grossman Worked for Oprah, Barry Diller & Phil Knight — and Says She's Never Been 100% Qualified

Fired at 24. Turned down her dream job at Nike, then took it anyway. Walked into HSN as the eighth CEO in ten years. Mindy Grossman built one of the least likely careers in American business, and in this episode of The Messy Parts she tells Maryam how: leaving college at 19 to move to New York with $1,800, landing her first job by admitting she couldn't take shorthand, buying 2,000 Aeron chairs to prove a broken culture was changing, and converting 30,000 Weight Watchers meetings to virtual in six days at the start of COVID. Plus the one question about her daughter she still can't answer. 🎧 More episodes of The Messy Parts: https://www.themessypartspodcast.com/ 📩 New episodes every week 👍 Share it with someone mid-pivot Key Moments 00:00 - "Here's What Success Cost Me" 💭 Mindy opens up on whether all she's achieved came with a personal price. 02:18 - "My CEO Journey Started When I Was Three Days Old" 👶 Mindy traces her drive back to the story of her adoption and parents who raised her to believe anything was possible. 07:07 - "I'm Breaking My Engagement, I'm Not Going to Law School" ☎️ At 19, Mindy makes the phone call to her parents that redirects the entire course of her life. 13:37 - "That Woman at the Front Desk—I Want Her to Work for Me" 👀 A designer notices Mindy filling in as a receptionist and gets her promoted before she even knows it happened. 16:18 - "I Need to Thank You for Firing Me" 🏈 Years after getting fired at 24, Mindy runs into her old boss at the Super Bowl and flips the story on its head. 24:00 - "I'm Going to Employee Orientation" 🎬 On day one as HSN's new CEO, Mindy skips the executive playbook and shows up where the real culture lives. 27:41 - "2,000 Aeron Chairs, Delivered the Same Day" 🪑 Mindy explains the small, symbolic move that told an entire company she cared. 29:39 - "That Is Fascinating" 📺 Mindy sees on CNBC that Oprah has joined Weight Watchers—and a new pivot starts taking shape. 30:09 - "It Was Not Easy for Her, and Not Easy for Me" 👩‍👧 Mindy gets candid about the toll her career took on her relationship with her daughter. 34:11 - "We Converted Every Meeting to Virtual in Six Days" 🦠 As COVID shuts everything down, Mindy and her team race to keep the Weight Watchers community intact. 38:23 - "I Have to Be a Lot Better at Self-Care" 🧘‍♀️ Asked what her body knows that her résumé doesn't show, Mindy admits the one thing she's still working on. Send us Fan Mail Email us: hello@themessypartspodcast.com To stay up to date with The Messy Parts and get all the behind-the-scenes content, follow us on Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a rating and review on Apple or Spotify or where ever you get your podcasts. Thank you for listening.

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Sex, Xanax & Naked Beaches: 20 Legends Drop the PR Filter

Behind every legendary career is an unfiltered human truth. In this special compilation, 20 of our most notable guests—including Mickey Drexler, Samantha Bee, Blake Mycoskie, Bonnie Hammer, Kim Hastreiter, Sally Susman, Sari Botton, and Baked by Melissa—reveal what happens when the PR guardrails come down. From Bevy Smith’s show-stopping mandate to "have sex, a lot of it," to surprisingly vulnerable confessions about daily tears, imposter syndrome, and surviving a crisis of confidence, these bite-sized moments cut straight to the heart. Equal parts entertaining, profound, and deeply validating, this episode proves that even industry pioneers, Pulitzer winners, and cultural icons are navigating life's inevitable mess. Send us Fan Mail Email us: hello@themessypartspodcast.com To stay up to date with The Messy Parts and get all the behind-the-scenes content, follow us on Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a rating and review on Apple or Spotify or where ever you get your podcasts. Thank you for listening.

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The Points Guy Couldn't Get His Own Credit Card: Then He Made $28 Million at 28 Years Old (Replay)

Brian Kelly (aka The Points Guy) has been obsessed with credit card and frequent flyer points since childhood. At age 12, his dad challenged him to book a family vacation using only points, and young Brian successfully got his entire family to the Cayman Islands for free. In this episode, Brian tells Maryam about the reality behind his meteoric rise: ruined credit, toxic friendships, launching The Points Guy as a side hustle, becoming a multi-millionaire at 28 years old - and the loneliness that followed. He shares hard-won lessons about leveraging relationships, knowing your superpowers, and why most career decisions aren't actually binary. This is the unvarnished truth about building an empire from nothing. Key Moments: 00:00 - "$28 Million for a Blog" 🤯 The surreal negotiation that turned a $10 domain into a life-changing payday — and the mind games that came with it. 02:12 - "The Points Kid": Growing Up With a Businessman Dad 🧳 Brian traces his origin story back to childhood and family trips funded by his dad's frequent flyer miles. 04:20 - Booking the Family's First Free Trip at 12 👦 After charging his dad $10 a booking, young Brian figures out the miles, how to fly the whole family to the Cayman Islands - for free! 11:54 - Wage Garnishment and a Payday Loan in SoHo 💸 Brian gets brutally honest about being flat broke in his first NYC job: bad credit, creditor calls, and a boss pulling him aside about unwashed suits. 17:11 - The Frugal Travel Guy Lets Him In on the Secret 🤫 A 65-year-old blogger pulls Brian into a side room at a conference to reveal the affiliate-marketing trick that would change everything. 19:27 - A Jealous Colleague Tries to Get Him Fired 😬 Brian recounts a coworker reporting him to HR out of envy and how one senior mentor quietly saved his job. 22:26 - The NYT Article, the Shower Epiphany, and "I'm Pretty Sure I'm Rich" 🚿 A viral credit card offer and a New York Times feature collide, and Brian realizes in real time that his site just made him six figures in a day. 26:39 - Selling The Points Guy for $28 Million at 28 💰 Brian breaks down the whirlwind negotiation and earn-out that turned his blog into a life-altering payday. 29:07 - Betrayed by a Friend Over Money 🏚️ After the sale, Brian describes friends turning on him and a trusted interior-designer friend secretly pocketing money meant for his apartment. 33:59 - "2020 Was the Best Thing That Could Have Happened to Me" 🛑 Brian admits he was on a collision course with burnout as CEO, until the pandemic forced him to step back and rethink everything. 37:53 - Rapid Fire: Advice for Before You Turn 35 ⏰ Brian fires off quick hits: take a great solo trip, never push yourself to exhaustion again, and stop asking for permission to try new things. Send us Fan Mail Email us: hello@themessypartspodcast.com To stay up to date with The Messy Parts and get all the behind-the-scenes content, follow us on Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a rating and review on Apple or Spotify or where ever you get your podcasts. Thank you for listening.

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The Truth About Burnout No One Wants to Hear | Laura Mayer

"I don't believe in burnout." That's Laura Mayer, podcast industry veteran and author of Tryhard, explaining why she's never really taken a break: not after a complicated pregnancy, not after quitting a stable executive job at ABC News, not ever. In this candid conversation with Maryam, Laura traces her try-hard tendencies back to a childhood spent tracking her mother's alcoholism, unpacks the false choice between "lean in" hustle and burnout culture, and explains why she walked away from a secure media career to be more present for her daughter. It's a funny, unflinching look at ambition, identity, and the stories we tell ourselves about why we work the way we do. Key Moments 00:00 - "That's Not the Answer" 😤 Laura calls out how meaningless the word "burnout" has become when people use it as an excuse and then do nothing about it. 02:06 - The McMansion, the Girl Scouts, and the Alcoholic Mom 🏡 Laura paints a picture of her idyllic-looking Chicago suburb childhood, and the reality of a mother who was "present, but not there." 03:36 - The Chart: Tracking Mom's Drinking on the Hurricane Scale 🌀 Laura reveals the five-point system she built as a kid — based on the Saffir-Simpson hurricane scale — to predict her mother's moods. 05:14 - Leaning In, Hard 📘 Maryam brings up Sheryl Sandberg's “Lean In” and Laura admits she read it, believed it, and leaned in harder than almost anyone. 11:08 - Front Row for the Podcast Industry's Big Bang 🎙️ Laura describes being inside WNYC as “Serial” exploded and Gimlet Media launched, kicking off podcasting's first gold rush. 16:16 - "Have You Ever Taken a Pause?" 🏥 Laura's answer: basically no — except one hospital stay, which she jokes might be the only "forced medical vacation" she's had. 17:34 - The Failed Loom and the Two Weeks in Crocs 🧶 After leaving a high-paying media job with a new baby, Laura tries and fails to take an actual break. 21:08 - "I Really Truly Almost Died After I Had My Kid" 🚨 Laura and Maryam swap near-death postpartum stories, and Laura explains how hers cracked open a permission to finally be creative. 22:49 - Breaking the Podcast Industry's Money Omertà 💰 Laura details the economics of the podcast-to-TV option pipeline, numbers she says the industry has a habit of not discussing out loud. 28:08 - Quitting ABC News for Her Daughter 👋 After quadrupling ABC's true crime output, Laura walks away from the stable, high-status job she once dreamed of to be home more. 32:44 - Rapid Fire: Advice for Before You Turn 35 ⏰ Laura fires off her list fast: start your retirement account, wear sunscreen, fix your sleep hygiene, set your meeting alerts 15 minutes early, and don't trust anyone who tells you "it'll be all right." Send us Fan Mail Email us: hello@themessypartspodcast.com To stay up to date with The Messy Parts and get all the behind-the-scenes content, follow us on Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a rating and review on Apple or Spotify or where ever you get your podcasts. Thank you for listening.

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Samantha Bee: Your Dream Job Will Suck. Do It Anyway.

"Even your dream job sucks." That's not cynicism — it's the most useful career advice Samantha Bee has. On this episode of The Messy Parts, she tells Maryam what 12 years at “The Daily Show” and running “Full Frontal” actually taught her: that no one hands you management training before you're leading 75 people, that public setbacks feel enormous and matter less than you think, and that the comparison game — "looking in other people's food bowls" — is where careers go to stall. Her rule for anyone under 35: stop worrying what people think of you, because they're too busy worrying about themselves. What's the "dream job" lesson you had to learn the hard way? 🎙️Like, subscribe, and share The Messy Parts. Show Notes: 00:00 - "Every Part of It Was Messy" 💥 Samantha Bee kicks off with a raw reality check about landing The Daily Show: even when you’re living out everyone else’s dream, the work can still suck a lot. 03:11 - "Fearlessness Born from Blind Ignorance" 🎭 Sam recalls trying a theater class just for an "easy A" and discovering that total ignorance gave her the weird confidence to get up on stage while everyone else was throwing up. 04:12 - "You Have to Do the Thing You Like... Just a Little Bit" 🧩 Sam breaks down her go-to career advice for her kids: finding that tiny kernel of joy in what you do, even when there's no plan B and the path makes zero sense. 09:14 - "F*ck Acting, Acting Sucks" 🎬 Sam shares how letting go of corporate approval and putting on sketch shows with friends actually saved her career. 12:21 - "Stop Looking in Other People's Food Bowls" 🥣 A practical masterclass on resisting the urge to compare your career trajectory to everyone else's, especially when navigating a sudden pivot or loss of stability. 15:21 - "Forged in a Fire at The Daily Show" 🌋 Reflecting on 12 years with Jon Stewart, Sam talks about the brutal schedules, looking terrible on camera, and why working with genius minds makes the suffering worth it. 19:23 - "I Didn't Go to Business School" 👔 Sam admits her complete failure at managing a team of 75 people when starting Full Frontal, learning the hard way that you can't be everyone's best friend in business. 21:15 - "I Pushed the Doubts Out Like the Kool-Aid Man" 🍹 A hilarious and honest trick Sam learned for dealing with soul-crushing self-doubt: physically shoving negative thoughts out of your brain and barging forward anyway. 27:32 - "When Is Enough Actually Enough?" 🛑 Sam rails against modern hustle culture and endless greed, reflecting on why so many successful people struggle to appreciate what they have and pay it forward. 36:33 - "No One Is Thinking About You That Much" 🧘‍♀️ Sam drops her ultimate piece of advice for anyone under 35: stop worrying about what others think of you because everyone is way too busy obsessing over themselves. Send us Fan Mail Email us: hello@themessypartspodcast.com To stay up to date with The Messy Parts and get all the behind-the-scenes content, follow us on Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a rating and review on Apple or Spotify or where ever you get your podcasts. Thank you for listening.

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No Plan, No Fear, No Quitting: Julie Gaines on Running NYC’s Coolest Store & Giving MS the Finger

She dug through filthy sub-basements in the Bowery looking for discarded restaurant ware — and built one of New York's most beloved stores. Julie Gaines, co-founder of Fishs Eddy, joins Maryam on the blue couch to talk about 40 years of messy parts: the husband who cheated and left for Florida (then Thailand), the three CEOs who didn't work out, and the MS diagnosis she now calls a "dignity thief." Julie doesn't sugarcoat any of it. She's blunt, she's funny, and she's still working through it all. If you've ever wondered what it actually takes to survive four decades in business and life, this one's for you. 🎙️Like and subscribe so you never miss an episode of The Messy Parts 00:00 - "Talk About a Messy Part You Have No Control Over" 🦽 Julie opens with a cold, honest gut-punch about her MS diagnosis and the slow shift from cane to walker to wheelchair, setting the tone for an episode that doesn't flinch. 02:41 - How Julie Met Dave and Found Her Store 💘 A chance walk down a West Village street, a movie date, and a shared obsession with funky glassware. Julie recounts the meet-cute that would eventually become Fishs Eddy. 04:48 - Digging Through Bowery Basements for Treasure 🕯️ Julie describes the filthy, dimly lit sub-basements packed with abandoned restaurant ware where she and Dave built the foundation of their business. 09:50 - "It Just Felt Like Opportunity" — '80s New York Nostalgia 🗽 Julie reflects on the grittier, more affordable New York she came up in, and how different that landscape feels from the city today. 14:41 - "What Do I Have to Lose?" The Cynthia Rowley & Caroline Kennedy Collabs 📞 Julie explains her fearless, cold-outreach philosophy that landed her collaborations and a memorably awkward first call with Caroline Kennedy. 19:14 - Three CEOs and the Problem With "We're All Family" 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 Julie gets candid about burning through outside hires because she and Dave couldn't stop treating employees like family, even the ones who didn't deserve it. 23:07 - Her Daughter's Phone Reveals the Affair 💔 Julie recounts the exact moment her daughter showed her the texts that ended her 30-year marriage, and the phone call to Dave that confirmed it was over. 25:22 - "He Clipped My Wings" ✂️ Her son's blunt assessment of what Julie’s marriage had cost her, and how those words still stick with her today. 29:59 - "I Was Devastated" — the MS Diagnosis 🩺 Julie walks through the early days of her MS diagnosis, the doctor's chilling advice to "go home and enjoy your family," and how the disease has progressed since. 32:21 - Why Julie Shares Her Messy Parts So Openly 🎤 Julie explains why she refuses to hide her MS the way so many women do at work, and how humor has become her survival tool. 40:17 - Julian Schnabel Turned Her Dishes Into Art 🎨 Julie tells the story of a customer who bought bushels of Fishs Eddy dishes to smash and use in his paintings — only to later learn he was renowned artist Julian Schnabel. Send us Fan Mail Email us: hello@themessypartspodcast.com To stay up to date with The Messy Parts and get all the behind-the-scenes content, follow us on Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a rating and review on Apple or Spotify or where ever you get your podcasts. Thank you for listening.

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She Got Cut From Pro Basketball in Sweden. Now Megan Griffith Runs Columbia's Best Team Ever.

"They cut me from that team." That's how Columbia women's basketball head coach Megan Griffith opens this episode of The Messy Parts — and it's just the beginning of her story. Megan tells Maryam about growing up a Chinese American kid in a homogeneous Pennsylvania suburb, playing for four different coaches in four years as a student at Columbia, and deciding to pursue a professional basketball career across Finland, Sweden, and the Netherlands. Megan gets candid about identity, belonging, getting benched by life more than once, and the leadership lessons she now hands down to her players as Columbia's most successful women’s basketball coach in program history. It's a conversation about turning setbacks into strategy — on and off the court. 🎙️ Subscribe to The Messy Parts for more honest conversations behind the scenes of extraordinary lives. Key Moments 00:00 - "They Cut Me From That Team" 🏀 Megan opens with the gut-punch story of getting cut from her professional team in Sweden — the moment that set off a chain reaction leading her all the way back to Columbia. 01:15 - Growing Up Between Two Worlds 🌏 Megan reflects on growing up in a mostly white suburb of King of Prussia, PA, with a mother from Hong Kong, and how she and her sister came into their Asian American identity later in life. 04:56 - The Recruiting Fluke That Brought Her to Columbia 🎓 Megan explains how a chance connection — not a big recruiting push — landed her at Columbia. 07:22 - Four Head Coaches in Four Years 👕 Megan recalls playing for a program with no brand, no real uniforms, and constant coaching turnover — and the leadership lesson she took from staying loyal through the chaos. 10:25 - The Pencil Skirt That Didn't Fit 💼 Megan describes trying out corporate finance after graduating, and the exact moment she knew it wasn't for her. 12:14 - The Conversation That Changed Everything ✈️ A friend's offhand suggestion to "keep playing" sends Megan overseas to Finland — and into a professional career she never planned for. 16:51 - From Cut Player to Coach 🔑 After coming home from playing abroad, Megan stumbles into coaching almost by accident — and gets told point-blank that "no Ivy League alums coach." 20:27 - Taking the Job Everyone Called "Messy" 📋 Megan explains why she almost didn't take the Columbia head coaching job, and what made her finally go all in on a program everyone else saw as a lost cause. 23:14 - The Recruiting Pitch That Rebuilt the Program 🌟 Megan breaks down her strategy for recruiting talent Columbia had never landed before — including two future WNBA draft picks other programs passed on. 30:43 - The NCAA Snub She Refused to Stay Quiet About 📢 Megan tells the story of being excluded from the NCAA tournament, handed a script for her next press conference, and choosing to advocate loudly for her team — even if it meant blowback. 37:44 - "Feedback Is Food, Failure Is Fertilizer" 🌱 Megan shares the philosophy that drives her coaching, plus her advice on setting boundaries, owning your decisions, and what success actually costs. Send us Fan Mail Email us: hello@themessypartspodcast.com To stay up to date with The Messy Parts and get all the behind-the-scenes content, follow us on Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a rating and review on Apple or Spotify or where ever you get your podcasts. Thank you for listening.

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Why Selling TOMS Destroyed Blake Mycoskie’s Mental Health (And What Saved Him)

What really happens after a founder sells their company? Blake Mycoskie built one of the most recognized brands in the world at TOMS — and hit rock bottom the moment he walked away. In this episode of The Messy Parts, Blake talks candidly with Maryam about founder identity, the mental health crisis hiding behind big exits, and why more money and more success never made him feel like enough. He also shares the advice he'd give every founder in their 20s and 30s, what Ted Turner told him before he made his first billion, and how healing his "core wound" changed his relationships, his parenting, and the way he builds companies today. 🎙️Like and subscribe to never miss an episode. Key Moments 02:15 - Why Blake Broke His 3.5-Year Social Media Silence 📱 After years of suffering quietly and feeling ashamed, Blake explains what finally pushed him to publish that vulnerable LinkedIn post. 6:24 - Naming the Core Wound 🔍 Blake identifies the belief that secretly drove every business he ever built: that he was never enough, and that the only way to earn love was to keep proving himself. 10:18 - How TOMS Was Really Born 👟 Blake tells the origin story — a simple idea hatched in Argentina, started out of his Venice Beach apartment with no investors and no business plan, that grew into a huge movement. 12:24 - The Night He Got a Nelson Mandela Award and Felt Terrible 🏆 One of the most striking moments in the episode: Blake describes receiving one of the biggest honors of his career and calling it one of the worst nights of his life. 15:20 - What Blake Would Tell Every Founder Before a Big Exit 💡 Hard-won advice: make sure you have something meaningful to pour your energy into on the other side — because the dopamine drop is real, and snowboarding only lasts so long. 21:45 - What Depression Actually Feels Like 🌊 Blake offers one of the most accessible descriptions of depression you'll hear: like really bad jet lag — knowing you should be awake, but being unable to move. 26:39 - What Ted Turner Told Blake Before He Made His First Billion 🏔️ In a private green room moment at the UN, Ted Turner warned Blake that when he reached the top of the mountain, the chest would be empty. 29:25 - How Healing Changed His Relationship With His Kids 👨‍👧‍👦 Blake reflects on a painful realization: that for years, his own "not enough" wound was being projected silently onto his children. 36:45 - The Advice He'd Give His 30-Something Self 🎯 Blake's closing wisdom: do something you genuinely love in your 20s and 30s, because true financial freedom almost always follows mastery — not the other way around. 37:32 - The Send-Off 💛 Maryam closes with three words that land differently after everything Blake has shared: "You are enough." Send us Fan Mail Email us: hello@themessypartspodcast.com To stay up to date with The Messy Parts and get all the behind-the-scenes content, follow us on Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a rating and review on Apple or Spotify or where ever you get your podcasts. Thank you for listening.

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NYT Writer Susan Dominus: "I Couldn't Risk It"

She's a staff writer at The New York Times Magazine, a Yale lecturer, and one of the most celebrated journalists working today. So why does Susan Dominus still feel like she's figuring it out? In a candid conversation with Maryam, Susan gets into the imposter syndrome that nearly stopped her from calling herself a writer, the sibling rivalry that quietly shaped her ambition, and the career regret she wishes she could go back and fix. Plus: what AI has changed about her reporting, why she thinks Substack isn't enough, and the advice she gives every student who wants to break into media. If you've ever played it safe when you knew you shouldn't have — this one's for you. 🎙️Like, subscribe, and share The Messy Parts. Key Moments 01:28 - The Psychology Behind the Byline 🧠 Susan explains why people tell journalists things they've never told anyone else, and why being truly seen is rarer than we think. 03:15 - The Bookish Kid Who Pretended to Read 📚 Susan paints a vivid picture of her Westchester childhood — the youngest of three, already pretending to read before she could, and processing her entire emotional life through books. 09:29 - The Piano Teacher Ultimatum ⏰ Her piano teacher forced a choice: piano or the school newspaper. Susan didn't hesitate for a second. 13:07 - Imposter Syndrome at Yale 😰 Getting into Yale didn't cure the self-doubt — it deepened it. Susan opens up about feeling like a "pretty average suburban kid" surrounded by legacy admits, children of academics, and people she found genuinely intimidating. 14:25 - "I Couldn't Risk It" 😶 Susan admits she avoided Yale's competitive writing classes entirely, not because she wasn't interested, but because she was too afraid to find out she wasn't good enough. 21:13 - The Good Girl Who Waited Until 30 ⏳ Despite always wanting to be a writer, Susan spent her entire 20s as an editor — partly for job security, partly to please her parents. 27:08 - How AI Changed Susan's Entire Reporting Process 🤖 Susan goes from AI skeptic to convert in real time. She breaks down exactly how she used NotebookLM and Google Gemini on her most recent NYT piece, and why she can't imagine going back to the way she did her job before. 30:17 - The Wasserstein Book Origin Story 📖 Susan traces her obsession with the famous Wasserstein family, and reveals the question that consumed her childhood: what would it feel like to grow up in a family where someone tells you "the sky's the limit"? 33:42 - The Limits We Put on Ourselves 🪞 Maryam holds up a mirror: Susan has won Pulitzers, teaches at Yale, and writes for the NYT Magazine — and yet she still talks about herself like someone playing it safe. 40:24 - The Twitter Regret She Can't Shake 🐦 Susan confesses that when the NYT begged her to tweet out her column back in 2011, she was too uncomfortable with self-promotion. Her advice to young journalists: get on the edge of what's new, even when it scares you. 43:11 - What She’d Tell Her 30-Something Self 💡 Susan closes with a deceptively simple piece of wisdom: if something new is forming around you at work, stop wishing it away and get involved. Send us Fan Mail Email us: hello@themessypartspodcast.com To stay up to date with The Messy Parts and get all the behind-the-scenes content, follow us on Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a rating and review on Apple or Spotify or where ever you get your podcasts. Thank you for listening.

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Gary Vee: Forgiveness, Fear, and the $540 Million Mistake (Replay)

In this re-release of one of our favorite episodes, Gary Vaynerchuk opens up to Maryam about fear, self-esteem, forgiveness, AI, leadership, and what he believes is a growing crisis of “late adulthood.” Gary shares why so many professionals feel stuck — not because of burnout, but because of insecurity and unresolved resentment. He breaks down his philosophy on kind candor vs. radical candor, why fear is the real career killer, and how over-coddling may be delaying independence for an entire generation. From parenting teenagers to leading thousands of employees, Gary explains why self-worth is the operating system behind success — and why forgiveness (especially of yourself) might be the most underrated personal development tool of all. If you’ve ever felt behind, afraid to pivot, or unsure of your next move in the age of AI, this episode is for you. Key Moments 00:00 — Forgiveness Is the Answer We’re Avoiding ❤️‍🩹 Gary opens with a bold claim: most people are emotionally “clogged” because they’re holding resentment. He explains why forgiveness — especially forgiving yourself — may be the most underrated growth tool. 02:46 — “Nice Guys Finish First” 🏆 Gary unpacks the tension between competitiveness and kindness — and why he believes you can be fierce in business without losing your humanity. 05:17 — The Late Adulthood Crisis 🚨 Are we raising adults who aren’t ready to be adults? Gary shares his controversial take on over-coddling, privilege, and why independence matters more than ever. 08:52 — Why He Doesn’t Fear AI (And You Shouldn’t Either) 🤖 Using historical pattern recognition, Gary explains why AI is just the next evolution — not the apocalypse. 14:18 — The Self-Esteem Conversation Nobody Wants to Have 🧠 Gary breaks it down: almost everything — career fear, content paralysis, insecurity — comes back to self-worth. 15:33 — The Rejection He Was Actually Afraid Of 💔 Despite fearless business moves, Gary admits he was afraid to ask girls out in high school. A revealing look at how fear shows up in unexpected places. 18:38 — Kind Candor vs. Radical Candor 🎯 Gary shares his leadership “kryptonite” — struggling with candor — and why he now believes honest feedback must come with kindness. 28:57 — Walking Away From the Family Business 🏪 After building his dad’s liquor store into a $65M company, Gary explains why leaving wasn’t guilt — it was growth. 31:14 — Maximizing Joy vs. Maximizing Money 🔥 Why Gary doesn’t optimize for profit alone — and how curiosity drives his many ventures. 33:35 — Call Your Mom. Forgive Yourself. 📞 One of the most emotional moments of the episode. Gary urges listeners to make the call — to forgive others or themselves. 43:53 — At What Age Do You Stop Blaming Your Parents? 🧨 Gary poses a provocative question: when do you fully own your life? A raw discussion about responsibility and adulthood. 47:46 — The Jets Jersey Story 🧵💚 Gary shares the powerful story of his mom knitting him a Jets jersey when they couldn’t afford one — and how that shaped his confidence forever. Send us Fan Mail Email us: hello@themessypartspodcast.com To stay up to date with The Messy Parts and get all the behind-the-scenes content, follow us on Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a rating and review on Apple or Spotify or where ever you get your podcasts. Thank you for listening.

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"My Parents Would Have Rather I Been a Prostitute.” How Ayesha Nurdjaja Became a Celebrity Chef & Built NYC’s Hottest Restaurants

What happens when you walk away from the career everyone expected you to have? Chef Ayesha Nurdjaja was on a path toward law school, working at a prestigious law firm and doing everything “right.” But something was missing. In this episode of The Messy Parts, Ayesha shares with Maryam how she left a promising legal career to pursue cooking, even when her parents stopped speaking to her and everyone around her thought she was making a huge mistake. She opens up about growing up in Brooklyn, discovering her passion for food later in life, working brutal restaurant hours for almost no money, and refusing to accept “no” as an answer. Ayesha also reveals the surprising story behind the creation of Shuka and Shukette, and how one bold decision changed the course of her career. 🎙️Subscribe to The Messy Parts and never miss a story worth telling. 00:00 - The Lie That Launched Her Career 🚪 Ayesha tells the unbelievable story of sneaking her way into Lidia Bastianich’s legendary restaurant kitchen after being repeatedly told no, and how that gamble changed her life forever. 03:40 - Growing Up Between Two Worlds 🌎 Ayesha reflects on her Brooklyn childhood, her Italian and Indonesian roots, and how family, culture, and belonging shaped who she became. 07:26 - When Religion Tore Her Family Apart 💔 She opens up about her parents’ divorce, the cultural and religious tensions behind it, and the lasting impact it had on her life. 11:06 - The Career Everyone Wanted for Her 🎓 From pharmacy school to business school to a law firm job, Ayesha shares the path her parents hoped she’d follow, and why it never felt right. 16:24 - The Bucket List That Changed Everything ✍️ A train ride, a list of passions, and a moment of honesty helped Ayesha realize she was chasing the wrong dream. 18:26 - Diamonds, DJing & Finding Her Calling 💎 Before becoming a chef, Ayesha seriously considered careers in music and diamonds—and explains how cooking unexpectedly won. 20:21 - The First Dish That Sparked Something Special 🍅 A simple risotto-stuffed tomato became the moment Ayesha discovered the joy of creating food with her own hands. 21:26 - The Day Her Parents Stopped Speaking to Her 📵 After quitting a stable legal career to work in kitchens for almost no money, Ayesha faced the toughest rejection of all — from her own family, who struggled to understand her radical pivot. 25:37 - Why She Never Quit the Kitchen 🔥 Ayesha explains the relentless drive that pushed her through 16-hour days, exhausting labor, and years of sacrifice. 39:33 - The New Year's Eve Party That Created Shuka 🎉 What started as a risky, Moroccan-inspired dinner party became the spark that led to one of New York City's most beloved restaurants. 41:22 - Betting on Yourself Every Time 🎲 Ayesha reflects on risk-taking, resilience, and why she's always been willing to go all-in on the things she truly believes in. Send us Fan Mail Email us: hello@themessypartspodcast.com To stay up to date with The Messy Parts and get all the behind-the-scenes content, follow us on Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a rating and review on Apple or Spotify or where ever you get your podcasts. Thank you for listening.

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She Kept Hearing "No." At 60, Sari Botton Finally Found Her Audience.

"No just means not right now." That's the philosophy that kept writer and Oldster founder Sari Botton going through decades of rejection before building one of Substack's most beloved magazines — at age 60. In this episode of The Messy Parts, Sari gets honest with Maryam about the messy middle: the identity searching, the failed attempts, the mean girls that never quite went away, and the moment she finally stopped contorting herself to fit someone else's story. She also shares the writing strategies that got her through a book deal she almost abandoned, and why she thinks the busier you are, the better you write. If you're a writer, a late bloomer, or just someone still figuring it out — this conversation is for you. 🎙️Subscribe to The Messy Parts and never miss a story worth telling. Key Moments 00:00 - "No Just Means Not Right Now" 💪 Sari opens with the mantra that kept her going through decades of rejection, and explains why she refuses to take no for a final answer. 00:53 - Meet Sari Botton 📖 Maryam introduces the writer, publisher, and Oldster founder whose New York Times feature sent her Substack into the stratosphere. 03:35 - The Hustler's Origin Story 👊 Sari traces her work ethic back to her parents, and how watching them juggle everything shaped who she became. 06:28 - The Creative Weirdo Who Never Fit the Mold 🎭 Sari reflects on growing up as a dreamy, performing kid who started writing plays at seven. 08:02 - "Since My Late Forties, I've Been Becoming Who I Really Am" ✨ Sari gets candid about the long road to self-certainty, and why it took decades of peeling away inauthentic layers to finally arrive at herself. 10:58 - The Secret She Was Keeping From Herself 🤫 Sari reveals she never actually wanted children — and the surprising relief she felt when a medical diagnosis made the decision for her. 13:02 - Mean Girls Never Really Go Away 😤 Maryam and Sari dig into the culture of indirect honesty, female friendship, and why being direct is still so hard — even at 60. 21:35 - "The Most Sustainable Situation I've Ever Had" 🙌 Sari reflects on arriving — finally — at a creative life that actually pays, and what it means to build something that works on your own terms. 23:32 - Trusting Your Instincts When Everyone Says No 🔥 Editors and agents said her anthology ideas would never sell — but Sari she did them anyway. Now she has 85,000 Oldster subscribers and counting. 26:24 - On Finding Success Later in Life 🌟 Sari gets emotional about what it means to finally be living proof that good things can happen at any age. 29:42 - The Memoir She Almost Abandoned 📝 Sari opens up about her 3am anxiety spirals while writing her memoir, the Pomodoro method that saved her, and why the first draft just needs to exist. 35:07 - Rapid Fire: Messy Moments, Confidence Crises & Walk-On Songs 🎤 Sari's messiest moment, her advice for anyone in a confidence crisis, and the song that gave her the courage to write her memoir. Send us Fan Mail Email us: hello@themessypartspodcast.com To stay up to date with The Messy Parts and get all the behind-the-scenes content, follow us on Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a rating and review on Apple or Spotify or where ever you get your podcasts. Thank you for listening.

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Bonnie Hammer Gave Her Boss the Finger. It Changed Her Career.

Bonnie Hammer ran 10 networks and two studios at NBCUniversal — but her career didn't start in a corner office. It started cleaning up dog poop on a kids' TV set. In this episode of The Messy Parts, Bonnie gets radically honest with Maryam about the moments that actually shaped her career: being passed over for the top job at NBC, negotiating her way into her own studio, saying yes to WWE when every instinct said no, and building one of the most collaborative cultures in a notoriously cutthroat industry. Plus: Bonnie’s honest take on ageism in media, AI's impact on the entertainment industry, and what she'd tell her younger self today. If you've ever been told no, hit a wall, or wondered whether kindness is actually a liability in business — this one's for you. 🎙️Subscribe for more conversations with leaders who tell the truth about how they really got there. Key Moments: 00:00 - The NBC Betrayal 😤 Bonnie reveals she was promised the top job at NBC by Jeff Zucker — and then watched it go to someone with a fraction of her experience. 00:56 - Meet Bonnie Hammer 🎬 Maryam introduces the legendary NBCUniversal Vice Chair who ran 10 networks and two studios — and never played the power game. 06:24 - Queens Girl, Russian Roots 🏙️ Bonnie traces her resilience and optimism back to her immigrant father, whose philosophy was simple: if you can't do it, you're not trying hard enough. 07:10 - Dog Poop and Destiny 🐾 How a freelance photography gig on a kids' show — and cleaning up after an untrained sheepdog — set Bonnie on the path to a television empire. 11:00 - The Problem Solver Mindset 🕵️‍♀️ Bonnie explains why she never sees walls — only cracks — and how she used photography to break into a circle of moms who wouldn't give her the time of day. 14:50 - Never Take No for an Answer 🚪 The remarkable story of how Bonnie talked her way into graduate school after missing the deadline — and the lesson about honesty and vulnerability that still drives her today. 17:03 - The Rollercoaster Dare 🎢 At an NBC Universal executive retreat in Orlando, Bonnie takes a dare and rides a rollercoaster — and realizes she's the only woman who showed up. 24:22 - "I Gave My Boss the Finger" 🤼 Bonnie's unfiltered reaction when she was asked to take on WWE — and how one of the most unexpected assignments of her career became one of her favorites. 29:56 - Zucker Lied. She Negotiated Anyway. 💰 The inside story of how Bonnie turned the worst professional betrayal of her career into her own studio, and nearly doubled her salary. 37:07 - Not Retired. Rewired. 🔄 Bonnie gets honest about leaving NBCUniversal — it wasn't entirely her choice — and why she wishes she'd stepped off the corporate ladder a decade earlier to build something of her own. Send us Fan Mail Email us: hello@themessypartspodcast.com To stay up to date with The Messy Parts and get all the behind-the-scenes content, follow us on Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a rating and review on Apple or Spotify or where ever you get your podcasts. Thank you for listening.

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Ed Sheeran, Pizza Rat & Getting Hacked: Rick McGuire on Running Subway Creatures and Loving New York

What does it take to build one of New York City's most recognizable social media brands — from scratch, in secret, while working a day job? Subway Creatures founder Rick McGuire tells Maryam the whole story: from working at VH1 and MTV while quietly building Subway Creatures on the side to Pizza Rat, Ed Sheeran, and a very public account hack that brought him to tears and nearly took everything. Rick gets honest about the chaos of entrepreneurship, learning to value your own work, and why New York City's subway is the greatest content machine on earth. If you're building something from nothing, this one's for you. 🎙️ Loved this episode? Subscribe to The Messy Parts on YouTube and wherever you get your podcasts — and leave us a review so more people can find us. Key Moments: 00:00 - The Hack That Almost Broke Everything 😱 Rick opens the episode with a gut-punch — someone took over his Subway Creatures account for months, and it was the first time he'd cried in years. 00:24 - Meet Rick McGuire 🗽 Host Maryam Banikarim introduces the man behind Subway Creatures, What Is New York, and some of NYC's most-followed social media accounts. 01:52 - How Subway Creatures Was Born 📱 Rick shares how a daily commute from New Jersey and a desire to stop annoying his friends turned into one of Instagram's most iconic accounts. 05:15 - Why the Subway is the World's Greatest Melting Pot 🚇 Rick and Maryam geek out over what makes the NYC subway so special — and why forcing millions of people underground together creates pure magic. 09:33 - From VH1 Intern to MTV Producer 🎬 Rick walks through his decade in television, the grunt work that made him grittier, and the unsustainable realities of the production world. 11:21 - The Secret Side Hustle 🤫 Rick reveals how he built Subway Creatures in the shadows while working full-time, terrified his employer would find out and wondering who actually owned what he was creating. 13:02 - The Netflix Moment 💸 Rick's first big brand deal was with Netflix for Arrested Development, and he'll be the first to tell you he grossly undercharged them. 23:14 - Ed Sheeran & the Subway Performance Nobody Saw Coming 🎸 Rick tells the story behind one of the most viral subway moments ever — and how a seasoned subway performer had no idea what was about to happen. 26:09 - The Moment Rick's Dad Finally Got It 🙌 A CBS news meeting, a phone pulled out mid-briefing, and one very shocked father — the moment the Subway Creatures curtain got pulled back for Rick's family. 37:18 - Pizza Rat Was a Stunt — and Rick Has Receipts 🐀🍕 Rick drops the bombshell that the video that put Subway Creatures on the map was an elaborate publicity stunt by a mysterious, Banksy-like figure with trained rats. Send us Fan Mail Email us: hello@themessypartspodcast.com To stay up to date with The Messy Parts and get all the behind-the-scenes content, follow us on Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a rating and review on Apple or Spotify or where ever you get your podcasts. Thank you for listening.

"I Don't Know How to Balance All of This": Faherty Co-Founder Kerry Docherty on Business, Marriage, and Choosing Yourself

Kerry Docherty is a co-founder of Faherty, the surf lifestyle brand she built alongside her husband, his identical twin brother, and her mother-in-law. But behind the sun-soaked brand was a woman quietly carrying the weight of secrets — from childhood, from marriage, and from a business that nearly broke her. In this episode, Kerry opens up to Maryam about growing up in an Irish Catholic household where hard things went unspoken, what it really means to work with your spouse, the emotional affair that changed everything, and why she's spent the last few years reclaiming a word most women are taught to fear: selfish. If you've ever felt guilty for wanting something for yourself, this one is for you. Subscribe to The Messy Parts so you never miss a conversation like this one. Key Moments 02:04 - The Peacemaker 🕊️ Kerry describes growing up as the quintessential middle child in a Buffalo, NY household — always fine, always keeping the peace, and putting everyone else's needs before her own. 03:14 - Groomed to Be Good 👧 Kerry reflects on how she was conditioned from a young age to be kind, generous, and selfless, and how that conditioning quietly disconnected her from her own needs. 04:16 - The Green Ribbon 🎀 Kerry shares the childhood story of Jenny and the green ribbon, and how it planted an early question in her mind about the true cost of secrets. 06:15 - A Seed of Shame 🌱 When we feel we can't share certain parts of ourselves, it doesn't just stay hidden — Kerry says it quietly becomes a seed of shame growing from within. 10:02 - Pre-Enlightenment Syndrome 😂 Kerry coins her own self-diagnosis: "pre-enlightenment syndrome" — the belief that she was perfectly fine at all times — until her therapist told her she was actually repressed. 11:27 - Mom Goes to India 🧘 When her stay-at-home mom left for a month to become a yoga teacher in India, Kerry thought it was selfish — but really, it was a gift. 13:14 - The Van, the Store, the Dream 🚐 Hear how Kerry and her husband quit their jobs, drove a mobile beach shop cross-country, and sold flannels out of parking lots — the origin story of what would become Faherty. 17:59 - Salary Negotiation in Couples Therapy 💸 A couples therapy session quickly uncovered far deeper questions about Kerry’s value, emotional labor, and how she and her husband saw each other. 20:28 - "You Just Do What You Want" 💥 How an offhand remark that became the emotional center of Kerry’s entire memoir. 25:05 - The Fantasy World 🌀 Kerry created an emotional fantasy world around another person, and realized what she was really longing for was a part of herself she had buried. 27:05 - "I Read Your Letter to Beau" 📱 Kerry’s phone buzzes — her husband has found and read the private letter she wrote to another man. She describes the moment as both terrifying and profoundly relieving. 31:16 - The Messiness Is the Beautiful Part ✨ In her closing reflection, Kerry lands on the hardest and most honest lesson from everything she's been through: that consequences of telling the truth are messy, but they create intimacy. Send us Fan Mail Email us: hello@themessypartspodcast.com To stay up to date with The Messy Parts and get all the behind-the-scenes content, follow us on Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a rating and review on Apple or Spotify or where ever you get your podcasts. Thank you for listening.

She Was Called “Dumb.” Now Assia Grazioli-Venier Invests Millions in Women’s Health.

What if the hardest parts of your life were actually setting you up for something bigger? Assia Grazioli-Venier’s story is a powerful reminder that your worst moments don’t define you — what you do next does. In this episode of The Messy Parts, Assia shares with Maryam her journey through dyslexia, cancer, infertility, and major career pivots — and how she turned every setback into fuel. She opens up about building a venture capital fund, why women struggle to raise money, and what she wishes she knew about finance earlier in life. If you’ve ever doubted yourself or felt behind, this conversation will change how you see your story. 👉 Subscribe for more honest conversations about career pivots, resilience, and growth. Key Moments 00:00 - “I Thought I Was Dumb” 🧠 Assia reflects on growing up with undiagnosed dyslexia and how discovering it changed the trajectory of her life. 01:04 - The Pitching Mistake Women Make 💼 Assia and Maryam unpack why so many women begin pitches from a place of apology instead of confidence. 02:04 - “You’re Doing Them a Favor” 💰 Assia shares the mindset shift that transformed the way she approached fundraising and investing. 03:21 - The Miles Davis Quote That Defines Her Life 🎺 Assia explains why “It’s not the bad note, it’s the note you play after” became her guiding philosophy. 04:44 - Learning Money & Power the Hard Way 📈 Assia discusses entering tech and venture capital without understanding equity, finance, or negotiation. 08:21 - Why 98% of Capital Goes to Men 🚨 A candid conversation about venture capital, power structures, and why women are still underfunded. 13:26 - From the Italian Countryside to NYC 🌍 Assia shares her unconventional childhood growing up between rural Italy and Manhattan’s Upper East Side. 16:13 - “Dyslexia Is My Superpower” ⚡ She explains how dyslexia became one of her greatest strengths—and why mindset matters more than labels. 19:20 - The Accident That Changed Everything 🚕 After being hit by a taxi at 22, Assia’s original career path collapsed—and unexpectedly led her into tech. 23:13 - The Wild Early Days of Spotify 🎧 Assia recounts helping build Spotify during the early streaming era and why she believed in the future of music tech. 30:49 - The Cancer Diagnosis That Sparked Muse Capital ❤️ A breast cancer diagnosis led Assia to uncover shocking gaps in women’s healthcare—and ultimately launch her VC fund. 40:23 - How to AI-Proof Your Career 🤖 Assia shares her thoughts on the future of work, education, and the skills AI can’t replace. 41:36 - Advice for Anyone Struggling With Confidence 🌱 Her perspective on confidence, self-doubt, and why knowledge and work ethic matter more than perfection. 42:00 - “It’s Going to Be More Than Okay” ✨ Assia reflects on infertility, resilience, and why life’s messiest moments can become your greatest gifts. Send us Fan Mail Email us: hello@themessypartspodcast.com To stay up to date with The Messy Parts and get all the behind-the-scenes content, follow us on Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a rating and review on Apple or Spotify or where ever you get your podcasts. Thank you for listening.

Her Mother and Grandmother Said Nothing. Belle Burden Broke the Silence.

Belle Burden was raised in a family where you simply did not talk about the messy parts. So when her husband left without explanation during COVID lockdown — and then asked her to tell people it was amicable — something in her snapped. In this episode, the New York Times bestselling author of “Strangers” tells Maryam about the moment she chose radical honesty over a managed narrative, and why that single decision changed everything. Belle and Maryam explore the eerie parallel between how betrayed spouses and laid-off professionals are both pressured to keep quiet and stay composed — and what it really costs us when we do. If you've ever swallowed your truth to make someone else comfortable, this one's for you. 👉 New episodes every week. Subscribe for more honest conversations that might change the way you see your own messy parts. Key Moments 0:00 - When the Earth Moves 🌍 Belle reflects on what it means to have your life upended without warning — and why the only way through is one slow, deliberate step at a time. 1:40 - The Unexpected Bestseller 🚀 Belle reveals she expected her book to sell fewer than 7,000 copies — and is now in its ninth printing, reaching readers far beyond the divorced women she imagined. 3:22 - "I Thought I Was the Only One" 💔 Belle describes the flood of messages from strangers sharing almost identical stories of sudden, unexplained abandonment — and why these stories stay hidden. 5:17 - The Harvard Moment That Changed Everything ✍️ A cruel comment from a senior student convinced Belle she couldn't write — and she believed it for 30 years. 7:00 - Growing Up Paley 👑 Belle paints a picture of her unusual childhood — the granddaughter of style icon Babe Paley, yet quietly lonely, nerdy, and never quite fitting in. 10:22 - Breaking the Pattern She Never Could 💍 Belle explains how she consciously chose a mild-mannered husband to escape her family's legacy of infidelity — and how spectacularly that plan unraveled. 13:24 - The Prenup She Didn't Tell Anyone About 💸 Two weeks before her wedding, Belle was convinced to change her prenup — and didn't tell her mother, her lawyer, or her brother. 23:46 - The Sandwich 🥪 The most talked-about moment in the book: Belle makes her husband a sandwich as he tells their daughters he's leaving — and explains what it actually meant. 28:51 - Don't Make a Scene 🤐 Belle and Maryam unpack the eerie parallel between how women are pressured to stay composed after a husband walks out and how laid-off employees are managed into silence. 36:43 - Breaking the Generational Silence 🔇 Belle describes delivering the manuscript to her mother on Thanksgiving — and the phone call she received within 24 hours that changed their relationship forever. 45:19 - What She Knows Now 🌅 Belle reflects on what she's discovered about herself on the other side: a writer, a stronger woman, and someone far less fragile than she ever believed. Send us Fan Mail Email us: hello@themessypartspodcast.com To stay up to date with The Messy Parts and get all the behind-the-scenes content, follow us on Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a rating and review on Apple or Spotify or where ever you get your podcasts. Thank you for listening.

Bevy Smith Climbed the Ladder, Looked Around — and Jumped Off

What does it take to walk away from a six-figure career with no plan, go broke, and come out the other side with a Bravo show, an Amazon Prime series, and a Broadway stage credit? In this episode of The Messy Parts, the one and only Bevy Smith tells Maryam about growing up in Central Harlem, cutting her teeth in luxury fashion advertising, landing at Vibe and Rolling Stone, and then walking away from all of it to start over — completely sure she was making the right call. Find out what caused Bevy to realize her dream had become a nightmare, how she built Dinner with Bevy from nothing, and why she didn't book her first acting gig until she was 56. Plus: the sheer shirt/mink coat job interview, telling Vibe she couldn't fly coach, and what her mom taught her about men. If you've ever felt restless at the top, this one's for you. 🔔 Subscribe so you never miss a messy story. Key Moments 00:00 - Freedom Over Money 💸 Bevy opens with a bold declaration: she quit her six-figure fashion career at 29 because freedom has always mattered more to her than a paycheck. 01:47 - The Hamlet of Harlem 🏙️ Bevy explains why she calls herself "from the Hamlet of Harlem" — and why knowing exactly where you're from is the foundation of everything. 03:08 - The Barmaids Who Made Her 🍸 Bevy traces her entire hosting style back to the glamorous barmaids at the Dunbar Tavern on her block — the original glam pusses who made everyone feel welcome. 05:46 - How She Stole Her Own Job 📞 The legendary story of how Bevy, as a temp receptionist, told every caller the position was already filled — and ended up getting hired for it herself. 13:53 - Selling Fashion to Vibe 🎤 Bevy reveals how she landed luxury brands like Gucci and Prada in Vibe Magazine — not with data decks, but by telling the story of Black style as a cultural birthright rooted in the Civil Rights era. 23:02 - The Rolling Stone Interview Outfit 🐆 Bevy walks into a job interview at Rolling Stone in a mink coat, an Hermès scarf, and a sheer blouse — and explains exactly why she dressed that way. 28:37 - The Milan Breakdown 😭 The pivotal moment: alone in a luxury hotel suite in Milan, surrounded by gifts from fashion houses, Bevy collapses into tears and realizes her dream has become a nightmare. 31:32 - Broke But Not Broken 🙏 After two years of world travel, acting classes, and creative pursuits, Bevy hits rock bottom financially — and describes it as the most blissful period of her life. 33:38 - How Bravo Found Bevy 📺 The surprisingly casual chain of events — a friend, a phone call, Andy Cohen on Fire Island — that led to Bevy landing on national television. 41:22 - It Gets Greater Later 🌟 Bevy explains her signature mantra, pointing to her first acting gig at 56 that turned into three seasons on Amazon Prime's Harlem as proof. 43:57 - Rapid Fire with Bevy 🔥 Messy moments, last time she cried, what to do before 35, and the walk-on song that's been hers since day one. 44:18 - Do It Anyway 💪 Bevy's final word of advice for anyone in the middle of a pivot: "Do it scared. Do it delusional. Do it anyway." Send us Fan Mail Email us: hello@themessypartspodcast.com To stay up to date with The Messy Parts and get all the behind-the-scenes content, follow us on Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a rating and review on Apple or Spotify or where ever you get your podcasts. Thank you for listening.

Joanna Coles: The Career Advice Feminism Never Gave You

Joanna Coles built one of the most storied careers in media — from editor-in-chief of Cosmopolitan to running The Daily Beast. So when she says feminism got it wrong, people listen. In this episode, Joanna challenges assumptions about ambition, motherhood, and what a successful life actually looks like. She reveals why curiosity — not ambition — drove every major career move she made, what she wishes someone had told her at 28, and why the "have it all" conversation has been missing its most important ingredient. Plus: the moment she knew it was time to walk away from Hearst after 12 years, and what reinvention really looks like from the inside. 🔔 Subscribe to The Messy Parts — where real success stories include the parts that didn't go according to plan. Key Moments: 0:00 - The Boss Perk Nobody Talks About 💼 Joanna drops straight into one of her most practical pieces of advice — why being the boss isn't about power. 1:16 - The Taxi Ambush 🚕 Joanna recounts the audacious moment she drag-raced up Park Avenue and leapt into a CEO's car to ask for a job. 2:34 - "Feminism Got It Wrong" 🔥 Joanna unpacks her viral take — why she believes the feminist movement failed to celebrate motherhood. 5:46 - From Yorkshire to New York 🌍 Joanna traces her journey from growing up in "the Texas of Britain" to becoming the Guardian's New York bureau chief — and why she never went back. 8:15 - Curiosity Over Ambition 💡 Joanna rejects the label of "ambitious" entirely — and makes the case that curiosity is the real engine behind a big career. 13:29 - The End of the Magazine Era 📰 Joanna reflects on the bittersweet experience of leading iconic magazines while watching the industry she loved change forever. 20:38 - Getting Bypassed for the Top Job ⚡ Joanna opens up about being passed over for the CEO role at Hearst, and the very public, very boss way she chose to make her exit on a treadmill desk. 22:43 - The Portfolio Phase 🔄 Joanna and Maryam get real about the messy in-between — board seats, SPACs, and the disorienting freedom of not having one defining job title anymore. 27:12 - Walking Away from Her Marriage 💔 After 28 years and two sons, Joanna reflects candidly on ending her marriage — and why she rejects the word "failure" when it comes to long relationships. 30:13 - AI & The Future of News 🤖 Joanna shares what excites and worries her about AI, how The Daily Beast is using it, and why she's glad it still can't predict the news. 39:40 - Rapid Fire with Joanna ⚡ Alternate careers, the last time she cried, and the one fashion choice she'd erase from history — Joanna closes out with her most unfiltered answers yet. Send us Fan Mail Email us: hello@themessypartspodcast.com To stay up to date with The Messy Parts and get all the behind-the-scenes content, follow us on Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a rating and review on Apple or Spotify or where ever you get your podcasts. Thank you for listening.

Rapid Response: The "Most Stressed" Wellness CEO, with Calm's David Ko

Today we're dropping something a little different into your feed: a conversation from our friends at the Rapid Response podcast. Maryam was a guest on the show recently with host Bob Safian, but in the episode you’re about to hear, Bob sits down with David Ko, the CEO of Calm — the mental health and wellness app with more than 180 million downloads — right as he's announcing he's stepping down. Ko unpacks why he made the call, what the relentless pressure of the C-suite really does to a person, and how to draw the line between the kind of stress that sharpens you and the kind that quietly breaks you down. Visit the Rapid Response website here: https://www.rapidresponseshow.com/ Send us Fan Mail Email us: hello@themessypartspodcast.com To stay up to date with The Messy Parts and get all the behind-the-scenes content, follow us on Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a rating and review on Apple or Spotify or where ever you get your podcasts. Thank you for listening.