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The Maltiverse

Cavemen Studios

Welcome to The Maltiverse, Malta’s premier comedy podcast, putting the island on the global laughter map! Join hosts Jay from XFM and Steve Hili, two comedic powerhouses, as they skillfully navigate the quirks of Maltese life with wit, humor, and a touch of irreverence.

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20 episodes
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English

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S3 · E12
April 30 · 29 min
Maltiverse S03E12 - SEASON FINALE! Would You Rather overload…. And it Gets PAINFUL
This is it — the SEASON FINALE of The Maltiverse! And Season three is going out with a bang!You sent us your wildest Would You Rather dilemmas… and we got into them…From impossible choices like:• Street kebab 🥙 or a warm pint 🍺• Dream house 🏡 or… questionable life decisions 😳• Best friend hooking up with your nan – for a free holiday • And teabags - Steve Hili styleThen we take it to another level…⚡ We strap ourselves to the zapping machine that simulates period pain - and crank it UP.Pain. Screaming. Regret. Proper finale energy.If you like taking things way too far… this one delivers.Big love to our sponsors for backing the madness:☕ Bruvv (Balzan)Proper coffee, proper vibes. Run by two brothers and their mum — and they absolutely nail it.👉 Check them out: https://www.facebook.com/bruvv.mt🕯️ Fog Buddies (Ħamrun)Refills, Candles, and all sorts of grown up gifts! If you know, you know.👉 www.fogbuddies.com
S3 · E11
April 16 · 33 min
Maltiverse S03E11 - Uni Toilet Hookups, Polar Bears, & a hot mother in law!
Welcome to the Bad Bets episode of TheMaltiverse…We’re talking: Questionable decisions in university toilets 🚽 Coming face-to-face with polar bears while freezing to death 🐻‍❄️ Printing an obituary for someone…Whilst they are still alive! PLUS 👇 The Agony Uncle is back with: A uniform dilemma And a man dealing with the fact his mother-in-law might be hotter than his wife (and his mate is getting involved AND we wrap it up with a Would You Rather…involving a golf course and a terrible life choice. Plus we find out what wouldit take to make Jay be in a sequel to the most disgusting movie in history If you like chaotic comedy, wild confessions,and zero filter—welcome home. Big love to our sponsors: ☕ Bruvv (Balzan) – Family-run coffee done right. Top-tier brews,unreal treats, and incredibly good vibes every time. 👉 https://www.facebook.com/bruvv.mt 🕯️ Fog Buddies (Ħamrun) – Refills, candles, gifts, and cheeky“grown-up” finds you didn’t know you needed. 👉 https://www.fogbuddies.com 👕 K Concepts – The legends behind our merch. If you need printing,branding, or custom gear—they’ve got you. 👉 https://www.kconceptsmalta.com
S3 · E10
April 2 · 32 min
Maltiverse S03E10 - Terrible holiday stories, Paris Chaos & a Fake Proposal (we think)!
It’sthe April Fools episode ofThe Maltiverse… and as always things go off the rails as Steve andJay dive into (amongst other things) • A disastrous Paris adventure • Snogging complete strangers • A biscuit-based party game And of course our agony uncle feature is back– today we face a tattoo dilemma and what we think might be a fake proposal And we’ve got a Would You Rather featuring…crusty sheets and a ghost. Yes… this one gets very weird. If you enjoy wild stories, ridiculousdebates, and unfiltered comedy, you’re in the right place. 🎧 Subscribefor more! New episodes of The Maltiverse every twoweeks featuring: outrageous stories listener dilemmas bizarre Would You Rather questions and plenty of things that probably shouldn’t be said out loud. ⭐ Support the legends whosupport the show ☕ Bruvv(Balzan) Two brothers (and their lovely mum) running one of the best coffee spotsaround. Great coffee, great treats, great people. 👉 https://www.facebook.com/bruvv.mt 🕯️ FogBuddies (Ħamrun) Vapey stuff, candles, aromas and cheeky gifts for grown-ups who appreciate abit of atmosphere. 👉fogbuddies.com 👕 KConcepts The printing wizards behind our merch and branding. 👉kconceptsmalta.com #TheMaltiverse #ComedyPodcast #FunnyPodcast #StorytimePodcast#PodcastClips #ComedyStories #WouldYouRather #AwkwardStories #RelationshipFails#HolidayStories #MaltaPodcast #MalteseComedy #MaltaCreators
S3 · E9
March 19 · 27 min
Maltiverse S03E09 - Sports Madness, Gym Fails & Funeral Chaos!
Brace yourself for the wildest sports episode of The Maltiverse yet! ⚽💥 Steve & Jay go full chaos with unbelievable antics: streaking after scoring, gym disasters, and all-out sports mayhem. And of course, Jay’s sniffing adventures are back in actionPLUS, the Agony Uncle segment returns with:💀 A funeral mix-up gone hilariously wrong🤢 A man with… let’s just say a questionable smellWe also feature a would-you-rather question – featuring genetalia and goooooooooals!If you love chaotic comedy, savage takes, and Maltese madness, smash that subscribe button and join Steve & Jay as they tackle the world’s dilemmas, one ridiculous laugh at a time!Lots of love to our sponsorsBruvv (Balzan) – Family-run coffee haven brewing top-notch coffee & treats! 👉 https://www.facebook.com/bruvv.mtFog Buddies (Hamrun) – Aromatic stuff, Candles, & grown-up goodies to spice up your life! 👉 fogbuddies.comK Concepts – The legends behind our epic merch. Custom prints, big energy! 👉 kconceptsmalta.com#TheMaltiverse #SteveAndJay #ComedyPodcast #SportsFails #GymFails #FootballMadness #AgonyUncle #MalteseComedy #PodcastEpisode #FunnyStories #ChaosAndComedy #MaltesePodcast
S3 · E8
March 5 · 36 min
Maltiverse S03E08 - AI, Robots & a Pasta-Loving Chaos -Things Got a bit Weird
Would you date a robot? What happened when a camera went into Steve’s brain. And what exactly is he doing to that pasta dish? It is the special tech/AI pecial episode of The Maltiverse Podcast, as we dive into robots, the future (kind of) and what our listeners want from AI and robots — and some of the answers were deeply concerning. PLUS…The Agony Uncle returns with a messy love triangle(ish) dilemma And we got a brilliant “Would You Rather” involving a robot with toaster genitals (because of course) If you’re into AI debates, weird relationship talk, comedy podcasts, and Maltese chaos — this one’s for you. 🙌 Huge Thanks To Our Sponsors ☕ Bruvv – Balzan Specialty coffee, fresh treats, and family-run good vibes. Two brothers and their mum doing it properly. 📍 Visit them in Balzan 🌐 https://www.facebook.com/bruvv.mt 🕯️ Fog Buddies – Hamrun Your one stop shop for premium candles, statement scents, and grown-up gifts. Buy gifts to impress!📍 Check them out in Hamrun 🌐 www.fogbuddies.com 👕 K Concepts Malta The incredible printing pros behind our merch and custom gear. 🌐 www.kconceptsmalta.com 🎧 Subscribe for comedy, relationship chaos, Maltese madness, and the world’s strangest dilemmas with Steve & Jay.
S3 · E7
February 19 · 34 min
Maltiverse S03E07 - Everyone Has Drunk Stories
The latest episode of TheMaltiverse Podcast is a full-tilt dive intodrunken chaos, terrible decisions, and legendary nights out. Stories from the boys (and our listeners/viewers) include real-life stories of gettingabsolutely smashed, from throwing up while DJing, to threesomes during a weddingand antics involving roundabouts,fingers, and zero self-respect. This week’s WouldYou Rather goes straight to hell, forcing impossible choices involving the mums of your mates - not a would-you-rather to try at home unless you want to permanently ruin all your friendship! And the Agony Uncle segment levels up with one of the most unhinged hookup confessions yet: a potential one-night stand - and a sock that will never recover. If you love unfiltered comedy podcasts, alcohol-fuelled stories, brutal honesty, and banter that crosses every sensible line, this episode delivers. Expect chaos, naughty humour, and classic Maltiverse energy. Not for the easily offended. 🙌 BIG THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS ☕ Bruvv (Balzan) Two brothers (and their mum) serving absolutely amazing coffee, food, (thankyou for feeding us!) and an immaculate atmosphere. 👉 https://www.facebook.com/bruvv.mt 🕯️ Fog Buddies (Ħamrun) Candles, aromatic gifts, and grown-up goodies that make dangerously goodpresents. Check them out… 👉 https://www.fogbuddies.com 👕 K Concepts Malta The absolute incredible printing legends behind all our merch. 👉 https://www.kconceptsmalta.com
S3 · E6
February 5 · 41 min
Maltiverse S03E06 - Dating Nightmares | The Maltiverse Valentine’s Edition
Valentine’s Day is coming… and this episode of The Maltiverse is a deep dive into sex, dating disasters, and relationship horror stories you won’t hear anywhere else. From “no no Sundays” to dating disasters involving bus stops, scary dogs, and garlic breath,— Steve & Jay unpack some of the strangest, funniest, and most uncomfortable listener confessions yet. 💌 The Agony Uncle segment is BACKIncluding hilariously messy relationship problems, like one unforgettable story involving a man being blamed for something that definitely wasn’t his fault… but absolutely ruined the bathroom. 🤔 Would You Rather? A truly naughty dilemma that nobody asked for, involving orifices, questionable smells, and instant regret.
S3 · E5
January 22 · 31 min
Maltiverse S03E05 – Fears and Icks
After our festive mini-episodes, The Maltiverse is BACK with a full-fat main episode. This Episode dives headfirst into irrational fears, unexplained icks, and deeply questionable human behaviour.From belly buttons and hair to mice, dolls, and other things that absolutely should not be terrifying — we unpack the weirdest fears you didn’t know you had (and some you definitely do).We also accidentally invent an NGO designed to help people pitch tents… for reasons that will make sense once you hear it.🔥 PLUS:The return of Agony Uncle — solving listener problems that are equal parts hilarious and filthy like the issue with the listener who accidentally sent a naughty video to the family WhatsApp groupA brutally wrong Would You Rather involving not knowing who you’re doing it withIf you like comedy that lives somewhere between therapy, chaos, and terrible ideas — this one’s for you.🎧 Sponsored by legends:☕ Bruvv (Balzan)Two brothers and one mum serving exceptional coffee and treats👉 https://www.facebook.com/bruvv.mt🕯️ Fog Buddies (Ħamrun)Candles, aromatic gifts, and grown-up goodies👉 https://www.fogbuddies.com👕 K Concepts MaltaThe printing wizards behind our merch👉 https://www.kconceptsmalta.comhttps://youtu.be/GzndwjX8Llk
S3 · E4
January 8 · 8 min
Maltiverse S03E04 – Happy New Year
Welcome to the first Maltiverse madness of 2026!Steve & Jay are back with a chaotic mini-episode packed with New Year comedy, Malta based gossip, and all the unhinged nonsense you love.This episode full of New Years Chaos dives into:⚾ The World Series (sort of)👅 A Maltese celebrity lick🌚 Gl*ryhole conversations (because… of course)☕ Our FIRST Would You Rathers of 2026If you love Maltese comedy, funny podcasts, ridiculous banter, and two idiots saying things they definitely shouldn’t… this episode is for you.💥 SPONSORED BYBruvv (Balzan) – Coffee, treats & the perfect start to 2026👉 www.facebook.com/bruvv.mtFog Buddies (Ħamrun) – Candles, gifts & grown-up goodies👉 www.fogbuddies.comK Concepts – Printing legends behind Maltiverse merch👉 www.kconceptsmalta.comhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uxffxZG1jNI
S3 · E3
Dec 26, 2025 · 7 min
Maltiverse S03E03 – Boxing Day Bonus
It’s Boxing Day, and the Maltiverse is bringing you a wild, festive, laugh-out-loud special! Just a mini-episode as Steve & Jay unwrap the madness of the holidays—secret Santas, hammeroids, and even (maybe) Christmas holograms 🤯https://youtu.be/60RESU7MOc4Expect:🔥 Ridiculous Maltese chaos🎁 Festive laughs☕ …and maybe a holographic Steve. Just to make things even weirder!💥 Big love to our sponsors:Bruvv (Balzan) – Coffee and treats that make the Christmas season even better!👉 www.facebook.com/bruvv.mtFog Buddies (Hamrun) – Candles, gifts & grown-up goodies – perfect gifts for Xmas 👉 www.fogbuddies.comK Concepts – Printing legends behind our iconic merch👉 www.kconceptsmalta.com🎧 Subscribe NOW for:Hilarious Maltese comedy Steve & Jay’s wild takes on life, Would you rathers, and terrible advice!
S3 · E2
Dec 11, 2025 · 32 min
Maltiverse S03E02 – Christmas Disasters
It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas on The Maltiverse!This week Steve & Jay unwrap the terrible gifts, and festive fails from Malta and beyond.From a dodgy goldfish to an ashtray shaped like someone’s… erm… bits, all the way to the legendary saga of an injured colonel’s wife — we’re diving headfirst into the wildest holiday mishaps you sent in.🎁 PLUS:We play a totally deranged Christmas Would You Rather? featuring fairy lights, questionable decorations, and… yes… anuses. (We’re sorry. Sort of.)This episode is for you if you’ve ever:🎁 Received a terrible Christmas present🍷 Got way too excited at the office Xmas party😳 Survived a painfully awkward Christmas lunch…then welcome home. This is your festive chaos.👇 Got your own story or a problem for Agony Uncles Steve & Jay?Send it here: cavemen.me/story⭐ Huge thanks to our sponsors:☕ Bruvv (Balzan) – Amazing coffee & treats by two brothers (and an awesome mum!)👉 www.facebook.com/bruvv.mt🕯 Fog Buddies (Ħamrun) – Candles, adult gifts & aromatic Christmas goodies👉 www.fogbuddies.com👕 K Concepts – The printing legends behind our merch👉 www.kconceptsmalta.comhttps://youtu.be/cSCJWfLy5C8🎧 Subscribe for Maltese madness, listener confessions, and the funniest WTF stories from the island and beyond!
S3 · E1
Nov 27, 2025 · 39 min
Maltiverse S03E01 – Nightmare Bosses, Crappy Jobs & Wild Advice!
We’re back, baby! Season 3 of The Maltiverse kicks off with a bang – and this one’s all about terrible bosses, crappy jobs, and the funniest work stories you’ll ever hear.From the boss who shaved his bits in front of his employee to the football coach who analysed the WRONG team – Steve and Jay are diving into the wildest job stories from Malta and beyond.Plus:💌 The Agony Uncle segment is back – with some hilarious (and slightly filthy) listener problems.🤔 A Would You Rather that goes completely off the rails… and leaves one Maltese radio station manager catching a few strays!If you’ve ever had a nightmare job, a mad boss, or just love a laugh about the madness of work life – this one’s for you.👇 Got your own story or problem for Agony Uncle?Send it to cavemen.me/story💥 Big shoutout to our amazing sponsors:☕ Bruvv (Balzan) – Two brothers (and one mum) serving up brilliant coffee and treats!👉 https://www.facebook.com/bruvv.mt/🕯️ Fog Buddies (Hamrun) – Aromatic gifts, candles, and grown-up goodies. Perfect for Christmas!👉 www.fogbuddies.com👕 K Concepts – Printing legends behind our merch!👉 www.kconceptsmalta.comhttps://youtu.be/Lvkc-HCWMgU🎧 Hit subscribe for more chaos, comedy, and Maltese madness – with Steve & Jay tackling the world’s dilemmas, one laugh at a time.
Oct 3, 2025 · 12 min
Maltiverse Would You Rather Summer Series 012 – Abigail & Carlos
WOULD YOU RATHER Welcome to the SEASON FINALE of the most chaotic game in Malta – The Maltiverse: Would You Rather – Summer Specials! 🌞🍹 To bring the curtain down, the fearless Abigail Mallia and the unstoppable Carlos Debattista returned for the last dance of summer — diving head-first into the most outrageous dilemmas yet: ⚡ Naked boss… or naked Nanna?👽 Alien abduction… or caressing Peppi Azzopardi?🧻 And the eternal mystery: Why do mummies love us so much? Fuelling this madness from episode one all the way to the grand finale were the heroes of flavour – BRUVV Balzan 🍋🍝. Two brothers (and their mum ❤️) keeping the madness alive with food so cheeky and soulful, it deserves its own standing ovation. (Vegans, rejoice — they’ve got you covered too 🌱). And so… the season closes. A summer of mayhem, laughter, and the kind of questions you’ll never get out of your head. Thank you BRUVV. Thank you guests. And thank YOU for playing along. 🙌 This wasn’t just a game.This was The Maltiverse: Would You Rather.The season may be over… but the legend lives on. 🚀✨AND We have got a new season coming up in just a few weeks! 📍 https://www.facebook.com/bruvv.mt #TheMaltiverse #WouldYouRather #SeasonFinale #SummerSpecials #Bruvv #Cavemen #ComedyChaos #EpicFinale #NannaVsBoss #SteveHili #JasonZammit #MadeInMalta #Maltesesummer https://youtu.be/MQVH5FIdXJk
Sep 26, 2025 · 5 min
Maltiverse Would You Rather Summer Series 011 – Denise Gafa
WOULD YOU RATHER🔥 Have your nudes splashed across the front page… or never climax again? 😳Welcome to the penultimate episode of the wildest game of the Maltese summer – The Maltiverse: Would You Rather – Summer Specials! 🎉🌞 This week, fan-favourite Denise Gafa returned to face even more ridiculous dilemmas. And yes, chaos quickly followed as we debated…✨ Glow-in-the-dark genitals vs musical ones 🎶🌙 Night hikes with Denise📸 And the very real danger of Steve’s Nutscapes getting published… And fuelling the madness as always – the legends at BRUVV Balzan 🙌🔥👉 Proper homemade grub.👉 Tasty. Naughty. Dangerously addictive.👉 And yes vegans, they’ve still got you covered 🌱. 📍 Show them some love ➡️ https://www.facebook.com/bruvv.mt“It’s messy. It’s naughty. It’s the end-of-summer chaos you’ve secretly been craving! 🍹🔥 https://youtu.be/I3rO8EVlp7Q
Sep 19, 2025 · 4 min
Maltiverse Would You Rather Summer Series 010 – Nate Darmanin
WOULD YOU RATHER 👉 stop touching yourself… or win a Ġieħ ir-Repubblika? Welcome to the most ridiculous game of the Maltese summer – The Maltiverse: Would You Rather – Summer Specials! 🎉🌞 This week, radio legend Nate Darmanin from Vibe jumped in with us… and things got beautifully out of hand: ⚽ Football glory vs orgasmic glory 🎯 🏅 National honours vs hand honours ✋🍒 👖 Why are Steve’s pants around his ankles (again)? And fuelling all this chaos – the legends at BRUVV Balzan 🍋🍝. Two brothers (and their mum ❤️) cooking up proper soul food – homemade, cheeky, and dangerously moreish. Those limoncello balls? Absolute heaven in a bite 😇. (Vegans, don’t worry, they’ve got your back too🌱). 📍 Show them love here: https://www.facebook.com/bruvv.mt It’s filthy 😏. It’s unhinged 🤯. It’s exactly what you didn’t know you needed. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S8O_xZt7PhE
Sep 12, 2025 · 6 min
Maltiverse Would You Rather Summer Series 009 – Dan Xuereb
WOULD YOU RATHER 👉 Fart every time you orgsm …or orgsm every time you fart?Welcome to the naughtiest game of the summer – The Maltiverse: Would You Rather – Summer Specials! 🎉☀️This week, comedy bad boy Dan Xuereb joined us… and things got wild very quickly! We dive into:🍑 Ultimate fantasies vs lifetime supplies of pastizzi 🥟⚽ Chelsea vs Nipples 🍒💨 Can Jay actually hold in a fart? All while munching on beautiful, epic treats from BRUVV in Balzan – two brothers + one awesome mum serving homemade, feel-good food (vegans, they’ve got you too 🌱). 📍 Check them out: /bruvv.mt It’s naughty 😈. It’s unhinged 🤪. It’s exactly what you came here for. https://youtu.be/y9_5ysquP6U
Sep 5, 2025 · 7 min
Maltiverse Would You Rather Summer Series 008 – Malcolm & Toni
🎙 WOULD YOU RATHER: Cousin “cuddles” or getting jiggy to L-Aħħar Bidwi? 😳🌽 Welcome to the filthiest, funniest game of the summer, The Maltiverse: Would You Rather Summer Specials! This week, theatre legends Malcolm Galea and Toni Attard are back for round 2, and things get very weird in just 8 minutes as we delve into: 🔥 What Jay used to have on his head in the 90s 🌍 Inc*st vs Traditional Maltese music 🚪 The ultimate classic – O-face or O-voice? All while demolishing mouthwatering treats from BRUVV in Balzan – two brothers + one awesome mum serving fresh, homemade, feel-good food (yes, vegans, you’re covered). 📍 Check them out: /bruvv.mt It’s naughty. It’s unhinged. It’s exactly what you came here for. #TheMaltiverse #WouldYouRather #MaltaComedy #SteveHili #JasonZammit #Bruvv #MalteseSummer #Cavemen #ToniAttard #MalcolmGalea #Theatre https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l96LlQbHfb0
Aug 29, 2025 · 5 min
Maltiverse Would You Rather Summer Series 007 – Nate & Nicole
🎤 WOULD YOU RATHER… 🤯 Spend a night with your ultimate fantasy… if they smelled like a family member? 😳👃 It’s another round of absolute chaos with The Maltiverse Would-You-Rather Summer Series 🌞🔥 with Steve Hili & Jason Zammit! This week, we roped in Nate & Nicole from Vibe to wrestle with the real dilemmas that matter: ✌ Fingers… or Fabrizio?📺 Crush… or your favourite newscaster? 😏🍝 And did Nicole play Would-You-Rather with Gino D’Acampo?! 🤯 Huge love to the BRUVV legends in Balzan – fuelling the madness with ☕️ next-level coffees, 🍩 sweet delights, 🍺 craft beers and 🍉 their unbeatable watermelon bliss. You can’t beat a bit of BRUVV! 📍 facebook.com/bruvv.mt https://youtu.be/Bo3j9a95z3w
Aug 26, 2025 · 7 min
Maltiverse Would You Rather Summer Series 006 – Steph & Wayne
🎤 WOULD YOU RATHER… Org*sm every time you see a 🔴 Laburist or a 🔵 Nazzjonalist? It’s the wildest game of the summer! The Maltiverse Would-You-Rather Summer Series with Steve Hili & Jason Zammit! This week we dragged in foodie queen (and 🐶 dog-obsessed) Stephanie Agius and Wayne from Vibe to tackle the BIG questions: 👄 Why do some people love it when Steve’s mouth is full? 🍝 Would Steph actually eat… dog bits?! 🤔 And which one of them was actually NOT invited on the show? Massive shoutout to the LEGENDS at BRUVV Balzan! From ☕️ banging coffees to 🍩 incredible sweet treats, 🍺 craft beers and 🍉 their watermelon bliss – BRUVV’s got it all. 📍 Hit them up: facebook.com/bruvv.mt https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kfuEDKcxAcA
Aug 15, 2025 · 5 min
Maltiverse Would You Rather Summer Series 005 – Undine & Kevin
WOULD YOU RATHER… 🤔 Have a permanent orgsm face or orgsm voice? It's the most awesome game of the summer! 🌞The Maltiverse Would-You-Rather Summer Series with Steve Hili and Jason Zammit! This week, we brought in burlesque queen Undine LaVerve and funny man Kevin Naudi to tackle the big questions… including: One night with your fantasy vs Alien probes 👽 Pants vs Steve!😳 Netflix special v h*mping nannas 😱 And none of this would have been possible had it not been for our amazing friends at BRUVV in Balzan! From awesome coffees to magical made-in house Ice teas and home made sweet stuf… you can't beat a bit of Bruvv! 📍 Check them out: facebook.com/bruvv.mt TheMaltiverse #WouldYouRather #SteveHili #JasonZammit #MaltaComedy #BRUVV #MalteseSummer #Cavemen #UndineLaverve #burlesque #kevinnaud https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tqx_r9nB-gg

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