The Breakup Debrief Podcast

Kelly H

The Breakup Debrief is your dose of healing truths, mindset shifts & coaching to help you stop waiting for closure & start rebuilding your self-worth. Hosted by Breakup Empowerment & Self Rediscovery Coach, Kelly Hunt, this show is for women ready to turn heartbreak into a whole new chapter. Expect real talk, relatable stories, lightbulb moments & the tools to reclaim the version of you that never needed them to choose you first <3

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58 episodes
Updated Sunday

Episodes58

Newest first

Sunday · 14 min
#56 Holding a Grudge Against Your Ex Is Only Hurting You- Time to Let It Go
You might hate Kelly a little during this episode, she's prepared for that, but she needs you to hear her out. This week Kelly is talking about the grudge. The anger you're still carrying. The flash of rage when someone mentions his name. The replaying, the revisiting, the weight of it all. And the uncomfortable truth, he's not lying awake at night thinking about how angry you are. He's just living his life & the only person carrying all of that weight is you. You'll hear: ✨ Why holding a grudge feels like you're doing something but is actually only draining you ✨ The real reason we hold onto anger after a breakup & why it makes sense ✨ Why the grudge can feel like justice, like significance, like not letting him away with it but why none of that is actually going where you think it is ✨ The big word that makes everyone uncomfortable- "forgiveness" and what Kelly actually means by it ✨ Why forgiving him does not mean what he did was okay, that he deserves it or that he gets access to you again ✨ His access to you and your forgiveness are two completely different things & they don't need to touch each other ✨ Kelly's own experience letting go of the anger towards her ex-husband & the person in her life who couldn't understand it ✨ Why forgiveness is one of the final stages of healing, not something to rush to or skip ahead to ✨ What to do if you're still neck-deep in the anger & why that's completely okay too He's not losing sleep over your grudge but you might be & you deserve that energy back💚 Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
July 26 · 38 min
#55 Who Is Kelly? Reintroducing Myself & The Breakup Debrief
If you're new here- welcome! Pull up a chair, grab your matcha & let Kelly tell you everything 🤭 & if you've been here since the beginning, you might still want to listen to this one. Because over a year in, with new listeners joining every week, Kelly is doing a reintroduction. Her story, her why & everything that led her to sitting behind this microphone every Monday. This episode covers it all the ten-year relationship that started at sixteen, the six-month marriage, the wedding night she spent alone in the smoking area in her wedding dress, the relationship that came after & the work she had to do on herself before she finally found what she'd always been looking for. You'll hear: ✨ Why Kelly started The Breakup Debrief & where the name actually came from ✨ The ten-year relationship that started at sixteen, growing up together & breaking up ✨ The wedding that almost didn't happen because of COVID & the wedding night that told her everything she needed to know ✨ The moment she knew the marriage was over & how she found the courage to leave ✨ The relationship that came after- what she thought was healing & what it actually was ✨ The work she did on herself in between- therapy, coaching & getting to know who she actually was outside of a relationship ✨ Her current relationship; how it feels different, what it has that the others didn't & why she finally believes she deserves it ✨ The message she wants every listener to hear who is currently in the thick of it- whether you're heartbroken, healing, single, or somewhere in between ✨ Your Alan is coming. She met hers on Tinder. There is hope! 💚 Whether you're showing up today feeling great or feeling a bit sh*t, this is a safe space for all of it & Kelly is so glad you're here Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
July 19 · 19 min
#54 Healing From Lies in a Relationship- It's not your shame to carry
Sometimes you're in a relationship & you know there are a lot of lies- you're wading through them, trying to make sense of them, trying to recover from them. And sometimes you go through a breakup & you didn't even realise how many lies there were until time passes, things unravel & you find yourself looking back at a relationship wondering what was actually real. Both scenarios add a very specific, very painful layer to a breakup. And this week, Kelly is talking about it. You'll hear: ✨ Why being lied to in a relationship is a whole different kind of grief because you're also grieving the reality you thought you had ✨ The self-blame spiral that comes with being lied to & why the finger needs to be pointed firmly at the liar, not at you ✨ The difference between big lies & the small, consistent, purposeless lies and why both do damage ✨ Gaslighting- how it goes hand in hand with lying & why it's so hard to recover from ✨ Why "I didn't tell you because I didn't want to hurt you" is actually just someone avoiding the consequences of their own actions ✨ Why lying is a form of control &why the person being lied to is never the one in the wrong ✨ The shame & embarrassment of being lied to and why that shame belongs to the liar, not to you ✨ How to rebuild trust in yourself before worrying about trusting anyone else ✨ Why going into new relationships with your eyes open is not the same as going in with your walls up ✨ Trust is built through trustworthy actions & what that actually looks like in practice The shame is not yours to carry. The embarrassment is not yours to carry. If you saw the best in him & chose to trust him- that says everything good about you and everything bad about him 💚 Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
July 12 · 52 min
#53 One Year of the Podcast; Kelly's Brother Tells All (P.2)
He's back & this time he brought ChatGPT 😂Part 2 of the one year special with baby bro Ian is here & it does not disappoint. We pick up right where we left off, with Ian sharing how he coped in the early stages of his own breakup (terribly, at the start, terribly) & dive straight into the chaos from there.You'll hear:✨ Ian's honest account of how he actually coped & what ended up helping him most✨ The embarrassment of walking away from an engagement & why it absolutely should not have felt that way✨ How Kelly was Ian's inspiration when leaving his relationship & became his proof that things get better✨ Whether men are actually getting better at talking about their feelings (Ian has thoughts & a very specific breakdown of the different types of men 😂)✨ ChatGPT as emotional support- Ian's confession & Kelly's reaction✨ The red flag green flag rapid fire round ✨ Breakup songs- which ones got them through it & why crying in the car is genuinely great therapy✨ Ian's final words of wisdom for anyone going through a breakup right now✨ Ian's Instagram handle for any single, attractive gay men in their late twenties to early thirties 👀Thank you for an incredible year. We love you for being here ❤️‍🔥Links & Resources📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
July 5 · 43 min
#52 One Year of the Podcast; Kelly's Brother Tells All (P.1)
One year, 52 episodes & to celebrate Kelly's brought in her favourite guest- baby bro Ian 🎉 This is the episode you didn't know you needed. Equal parts chaotic, hilarious, emotional & genuinely insightful because who better to give you the real story on Kelly's breakup journey than the person who had front row seats to all of it? In Part 1 of this special one year episode, Kelly & Ian get into Kelly's breakup history from Ian's perspective, what it was really like supporting her from the inside & Ian's own breakup & healing journey earlier this year. You'll hear: ✨ Ian's honest take on Kelly's exes- including which one he liked least ✨ The "I told you so" moment Ian had been sitting on & the story that goes with it ✨ What supporting Kelly through her breakups was actually like from the inside ✨ What Ian would tell anyone who is supporting a loved one through a breakup right now ✨ What it was like going through a breakup with a sister who is a Breakup Empowerment Coach & whether it actually helped ✨ How Ian handled telling people about his breakup when he wanted to keep it private ✨ The moment Ian sat Kelly down & kept saying "it gets worse"- and it kept getting worse ✨ How Ian coped in the early stages of his own breakup- spoiler: not well 😂 Part 2 coming next week & trust us, you'll want to tune in for that one too 💚 Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
June 21 · 13 min
#51 Seeking Male Validation After a Breakup- Why We Do It & How to Stop
Okay, be honest. After your breakup, did you jump back on the apps not because you were ready to date, but because you just needed someone to find you attractive? Did you post that selfie & spend the next hour checking who'd seen it? Did you find yourself flirting with someone you weren't even interested in, just for the attention? No judgment here. Kelly has been there too and this week she's getting into all of it. Episode 50 is the male validation episode- how we seek it, why we seek it & most importantly how we stop needing it from everyone else & start giving it to ourselves instead. You'll hear: ✨ The subtle ways seeking male validation shows up & why it doesn't always look like what you think ✨ Why your dopamine & oxytocin crash after a breakup makes validation-seeking completely understandable & what your brain is actually trying to do ✨ Why external validation is like a sugar rush & why it will never actually fill the gap ✨ How chasing validation from men is quietly delaying your healing without you even realising it ✨ Why the right person cannot fix a validation wound & what happens when you make them try ✨ The self-awareness tool that is always the first step ✨ Practical ways to start validating yourself- including the affirmation you can use even if the big ones feel like a lie right now ✨ The difference between enjoying a compliment & depending on one You knew you looked good in that photo. That's why you posted it. This episode is your reminder that you don't need anyone else to confirm it 💚 Also, Kelly introduces something new in this episode. The Breakup Clarity Call. A 90-minute one-to-one call for anyone who isn't sure about full coaching yet but needs some guidance, a bit of a chin wag & a clear action plan for what comes next. Details on Instagram. Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
June 14 · 18 min
#50 Off Campus & What It Taught Us About the Relationships We Actually Deserve
Have you watched Off Campus yet? Because if you haven't, go & watch it and then come back. This week Kelly is talking about the show that has taken over the internet & more importantly, the conversation it's opened up about healthy relationships, what we've been conditioned to expect from men & why so many of us were sitting watching it fully braced for the worst. ⚠️ Spoiler warning: this episode does discuss specific scenes from the show. You'll hear: ✨ Why Off Campus has been described online as a form of generational therapy ✨ The moments in the show where viewers were expecting toxicity, drama & blow-ups- & what it means that we were so ready for it ✨ How years of TV shows & movies have quietly taught us that jealousy means love, moodiness is romantic & chaos is passion ✨ The specific green flags in the show that felt radical but really shouldn't be ✨ Why "are you okay?" instead of a blow-up should be the standard, not the exception ✨ What it means if you watched this show & felt genuinely healed by it ✨ Kelly's comparison to Nobody Wants This- another show getting it right ✨ Why these men do actually exist & what to do if you haven't found yours yet ✨ A teaser for an upcoming episode with a very special guest (hint: he's single, thriving & smashing the gym 😂) The bar is not high, girls. Garrett Graham is not an impossibly perfect man. He just communicates, doesn't make everything about his ego & treats the woman he's with like she matters. That's it. That's the standard & this episode is your reminder to stop settling for anything less 💚 Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
June 7 · 13 min
#49 Why You're Addicted to the Situationship & How to Finally Walk Away
You know it's going nowhere. You've known for months. Your friends have told you. You've told yourself. And yet, here you still are. This week Kelly is talking about the situationship. Not to tell you what to do- she's not going to sit here and say "know your worth" & expect that to magically fix anything. She knows it's not that simple. Some of these guys have a GRIP! And today she's explaining exactly why. You'll hear: ✨ Why situationships can be a form of addiction and the psychology behind why you literally cannot logic your way out of them ✨ Intermittent reinforcement- the most powerful psychological hook there is & why it's the exact reason his three-day silence followed by one text sends you into a tizzy✨ Why the butterflies you feel in a situationship are actually anxiety in disguise ✨ The attachment style connection- why anxiously attached women are the most likely to end up in situationships & the least likely to thrive in them ✨ How the situationship becomes a form of self-sabotage & why it's easier to blame his unavailability than face the real fear underneath ✨ The danger of potential- why you're not in love with him, you're in love with who he could be ✨ The sunk cost trap & why "I'm already ten months in" is never a good enough reason to stay ✨ How to actually get yourself out of the loop- the honest, practical, no-fluff version ✨ Why consistency might feel boring at first & why that's important information about your attachment style, not your compatibility You are not silly for being in this. But you do deserve so much more than an almost & this episode is your reminder of that! ❤️‍🔥 Links & Resources📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
May 31 · 13 min
#48 Are You Actually Healed Or Are You Just Numb?
You've stopped crying. You've deleted the photos. You haven't checked his Instagram in three whole weeks. You're going to the gym, seeing your friends, getting on with life. So why does something still feel just… off? In this week's episode, Kelly asks the question that nobody else is asking: are you actually healed or are you just numb? Because numb is not the destination, girls. Life is for living. You'll hear: ✨ What healing actually looks like and more importantly, what it doesn't ✨ The difference between being genuinely over it and being dismissive of a whole chapter of your life ✨ The signs that you might be numb rather than healed — and why it is not your fault ✨ Why your nervous system can go into full shutdown mode after prolonged stress or trauma — and the science behind why it turns everything down, not just the pain ✨ The Vampire Diaries analogy nobody asked for but absolutely needed 🧛 ✨ Five questions to ask yourself to figure out which one you're actually in ✨ Why hustle culture and social media are making it harder to actually heal — and easier to perform healing instead ✨ Practical ways to gently reactivate your nervous system and come back to yourself ✨ Why you have to go backwards before you can go forwards This episode might confirm that you're doing better than you think. Or it might be the thing that finally helps you name what's been going on. Either way, you deserve to feel your life to its full extent. And this is your reminder that you can get there ❤️‍🔥 Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
May 24 · 18 min
#47 Clingy, Needy, Too Much: Reframing the Labels Women Are Given in Relationships
Has someone ever said something to you in a relationship, just one throwaway comment, that you then carried around for years without ever questioning it? In this week's episode, Kelly gets personal. She shares the story of the word that her ex-husband used to describe her that stuck like a label for years, the way it quietly shaped how she saw herself, how she showed up in relationships and how she eventually challenged it & reframed it entirely. This one is for anyone who has taken on a label from an ex, a past relationship or even just someone's passing opinion & started to believe it was the truth about who they are. You'll hear: ✨ Kelly's personal story of being called "clingy" in her marriage and why she accepted it as her identity without ever questioning it ✨ How one throwaway comment from an ex can become a deeply held belief about yourself ✨ The therapy moment that made her stop and ask but is it actually true? ✨ How to take your limiting beliefs to court & look at the real evidence ✨ Why words like clingy, needy, emotional & psycho are thrown at women far too freely and why they say more about the person using them than the person being labelled ✨ How to reframe a negative label into something that actually reflects who you are ✨ Why nobody on this planet knows you better than you know yourself And yes, she also announces that she would rather be someone's matcha than their cup of tea. A t-shirt may be incoming 🍵 This episode is your sign to look at the labels you're carrying, figure out where they came from, take them to court and decide for yourself which ones are actually true. Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
May 17 · 47 min
#46 Dopamine, Heartbreak & Why You're Not Crazy: The Science of a Breakup
Have you ever wondered why a breakup can feel so physically unbearable? The nausea, the chest pain, the inability to eat or sleep, the spiralling thoughts that won't switch off- and on top of all of that, the shame of feeling like it shouldn't be this hard? In this week's episode, Kelly breaks down exactly what is happening inside your brain and body when a relationship ends- and why it is quite literally the same neurological experience as going through a drug withdrawal. This one is backed by science, packed with practical tools & might just be the most validating episode yet. You'll hear: ✨ Why your brain in love looks identical to a brain high on cocaine and what that means for your healing ✨ The three feel-good chemicals (dopamine, oxytocin & serotonin) that your relationship was giving you — and what happens when they're suddenly cut off ✨ Why you can't stop checking his Instagram, rereading old messages, or looking for excuses to reach out — it's not weakness, it's neuroscience ✨ How your nervous system loses its main source of co-regulation when a relationship ends — and why that sends you into survival mode ✨ The role of cortisol in your breakup spiral — and the simple daily habits that help bring it back down ✨ Breathwork techniques (including the physiological sigh) that are scientifically proven to activate your parasympathetic nervous system fast ✨ How to redirect your dopamine cravings instead of white-knuckling through them ✨ Why you need both space to feel it and space to step away from it — and how to find that balance If you've ever thought "why am I being like this?" after a breakup, this episode is your answer. There is nothing wrong with you. Your brain is doing exactly what it was wired to do. Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
May 10 · 59 min
#45 From Betrayal to Breakthrough: Emma Kehoe on Healing, Solo Travel & Finding Love Again
We're back with a guest episode & this is a good one! Kelly sits down with Emma Kehoe- mindfulness coach, community curator, retreat host & the woman behind the podcast All of the Above- for a conversation that goes everywhere: heartbreak, healing, solo travel, toxic relationships, singles nights & finding your person when you've finally stopped waiting. Emma's story begins at rock bottom. In 2020, after nearly 10 years together, a shared home & actively trying for a baby, Emma discovered her partner had been cheating. Then COVID hit. With nowhere to run and no distractions to hide behind, she had no choice but to sit with it all & it turned out to be the greatest catalyst of her life. You'll hear: ✨ Emma's full story, from betrayal and grief during COVID lockdown to healing, solo travel & a relationship she never saw coming ✨ Why being forced to stop and feel everything was actually the thing that saved her ✨ The journaling practice that became her anchor and how she built her whole coaching journey from it ✨ How she went from always being in relationships to spending two and a half years truly single and why she thinks you need at least two years ✨ The masculine vs. feminine energy shift that changed how she shows up in relationships ✨ Her singles nights, what makes them different, how she met her own boyfriend at one & why in-person connection beats the apps every time ✨ Practical advice for navigating a shared house after a breakup ✨ Why jealousy is just inspiration in disguise and how to flip it This episode is for the girl who's been through it all and isn't sure what comes next. Spoiler: something really good does. Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree Find Emma: 📲 Instagram: @emmakehoe 🌿 Empower with Emma — retreats, hikes, workshops & 1:1 coaching: @Empowerwithemma 🎙️ Podcast: All of the Above
May 3 · 16 min
#44 Set Boundaries In A New Relationship Without Sounding Insecure
In this week's episode, Kelly tackles a question that so many of you have been too afraid to ask: how do you set boundaries & talk about what you won't tolerate in a new relationship, without sounding crazy, insecure, or scaring him off? Spoiler: the answer might not be what you expect! Inspired by a listener who also sparked Kelly's viral microcheating episode, this one goes deep on the fear behind "the talk" & why, in many cases, you might not need to have it at all. You'll hear: ✨ Why the fear of setting boundaries is often a sign of anxious attachment & what to do about it ✨ A powerful mindset tool for dissolving the worst-case-scenario spiral before it takes hold ✨ The truth about whether setting rules actually stops a cheater (hint: it doesn't) ✨ Why the right person won't need to be told to respect you ✨ How to let your past naturally communicate your standards, without a big dramatic conversation ✨ When to observe instead of explain, and why "letting them" show you who they are is your biggest power move Whether you're newly back in the dating pool or heading towards something more serious, this episode will shift the way you think about protection, trust & what it really means to know your worth. Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
April 26 · 14 min
#43 The One Year Breakup Milestone
In this episode of The Breakup Debrief, we’re talking about something that hits differently for everyone: The one year mark after a breakup. It’s a date that can feel heavy, emotional, nostalgic… or surprisingly neutral. Because no matter where you are in your journey — single, thriving, dating, or in a new relationship — this milestone has a way of making you pause and reflect. And sometimes… it brings feelings you didn’t expect. This episode breaks down: 👉 why the one year mark feels so significant 👉 why emotions can resurface (even if you’ve moved on) 👉 how to process whatever comes up 👉 and how to use this moment as a powerful check-in — not a setback 📧 Coaching Enquiries: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching
April 19 · 16 min
#42 Hot Girl Summer After a Breakup (Your Pep Talk to Get Your Life Back)
In this episode of The Breakup Debrief, Kelly is giving you the pep talk you didn’t know you needed: We are NOT wasting another summer crying over a MAN! Whether you’re fresh out of a breakup or finally coming out the other side, this episode is your reminder that being single, especially in summer, can be one of the best seasons of your life. You can either spend your summer stuck in the past… or you can get up, get outside, and start living again. And Kelly is very clear on where she stands. 🎯 What We Cover Why summer is the BEST time to heal after a breakup The concept of “Hot Girl Summer” (& why it actually matters) Why being single isn’t something to feel bad about The importance of getting out of the house and living your life Dating vs not dating & why both are fine Why this could be your last single summer 👀 How to shift out of “sad girl mode” & into your next chapter Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the “Where Is She Now?” segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
April 12 · 14 min
#41 No Contact Isn’t a Hack to Get Your Ex Back (Here’s Why)
In this episode of The Breakup Debrief, we’re talking about a bit of a controversial one: Are you using no contact to heal… or to get your ex back? Because there’s a huge difference. After a breakup, it’s completely normal to hold onto hopeto think they might come back, change their mind, or realise what they lost. But when no contact becomes: a strategy a “hack” or a way to get a reaction …it stops being about your healing & starts being about them & we're not doing that! Kelly breaks down why using no contact as a tactic is not only ineffective but can actually leave you worse off in the long run. Because if you spend weeks “doing no contact” while secretly waiting for them to come back… you haven’t actually healed at all Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the “Where Is She Now?” segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
April 5 · 49 min
#40 Is It Cheating? Micro Cheating & Social Media Boundaries Explained
In this episode of The Breakup Debrief, we’re diving into one of the most debated topics in modern dating: Micro cheating. With social media blurring the lines more than ever, it’s getting harder to define what is actually acceptable in a relationship- and what crosses the line. From liking photos and replying to stories… to hiding messages and keeping people around who clearly fancy you… Where do we draw the line? This episode breaks down: Real-life scenarios Listener poll results Personal experiences And the grey areas that leave so many people confused Because it’s not always black and white. But one thing is clear: If it feels off, it probably is. 🎯 What You’ll Learn: What micro cheating actually is Why social media has blurred relationship boundaries Common behaviours that people question (likes, DMs, exes, etc.) How different people define cheating Why boundaries matter more than labels Red flags to watch for in modern dating How to build trust in a social media world Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the “Where Is She Now?” segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
March 29 · 12 min
#39 Did I Manifest My Breakup? (Anxious Attachment & Dating Anxiety)
In this episode of The Breakup Debrief, we’re talking about a thought that so many people have after a relationship ends: “Did I cause this?” “Did I manifest the breakup?” If you have an anxious attachment style, this will probably hit home. We dive into how fear of abandonment, overthinking & constantly worrying about being left can impact how you show up in relationships and why that doesn’t mean you’re to blame for things ending. Kelly breaks down the difference between: Manifesting an outcome And simply being stuck in a fight-or-flight state in your relationship Because when you’re operating from fear, it can stop you from being your true self and that changes the dynamic entirely. This episode is a mix of truth, reassurance, and a bit of tough love: 👉 You don’t need to perform to be loved 👉 You don’t need to earn your place in someone’s life 👉 And you cannot lose what is truly meant for you 🎯 What You’ll Learn Why anxious attachment makes you fear abandonment The truth about “manifesting” a breakup How fear impacts your behaviour in relationships Why not being yourself creates relationship anxiety The vicious cycle of needing validation Why dating should feel simple (even if it’s uncomfortable) How to shift your mindset around rejection Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the “Where Is She Now?” segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
March 23 · 24 min
#38 Why Dating Feels So Confusing Right Now (The Manosphere Explained)
In this episode of The Breakup Debrief, Kelly dives into the growing conversation around modern dating and the influence of the manosphere, sparked by watching Louis Theroux: The Manosphere. If you’ve been dating recently and found yourself thinking “what is going on?” — you’re not alone. Kelly breaks down how certain online ideologies are shaping dating behaviours, particularly around emotional availability, effort, and relationship dynamics. She explores why some men are drawn to this content, how it shows up in real-life dating experiences, and why it can leave women feeling confused, insecure, or like they have to prove their worth. This episode isn’t about blaming, it’s about understanding. Most importantly, Kelly brings it back to what actually matters: your standards, your self-worth, and your ability to recognise what you deserve in a relationship. 🎯 What You’ll Learn Why dating feels more confusing than ever right now What the “manosphere” is and how it influences dating behaviours Why some men are drawn to these ideologies Common dating patterns: hot & cold, inconsistency, emotional unavailability Why you might feel like you have to prove your worth How these dynamics impact self-worth and attachment Why this behaviour is not a reflection of you How to recognise red flags early and protect your energy 📧 Share your story for the “Where Is She Now?” segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
March 16 · 28 min
#37 The Breakup You Saw Coming: Why It Still Hurts So Much
In this episode of The Breakup Debrief, Kelly explores a very different kind of breakup- the one you knew was coming. Sometimes relationships don’t end suddenly. Instead, they slowly reach a point where unresolved issues, repeated conversations & differences about the future start to build up over time. You might feel the tension, sense the uncertainty & quietly wonder if the relationship will last… but still keep going anyway. Kelly discusses why people stay in relationships even when they suspect the end may be approaching, why these breakups can still feel incredibly painful & why it’s so tempting to go back once the relationship ends. Drawing from her own experience, she also talks about the emotional complexity of “kicking the can down the road” in a relationship- hoping problems will resolve themselves, delaying difficult conversations & eventually reaching the moment where someone has to address the elephant in the room. If you've ever been in a relationship where the ending felt inevitable but still heartbreaking, this episode will help you understand why that experience can be so difficult and how to navigate the healing process. Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the “Where Is She Now?” segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree 💛 Work With Kelly – Breakup Empowerment Coaching DM “DEBRIEF” on Instagram to learn more about Kelly’s Breakup Empowerment Framework or apply through the link in bio 🎙 Subscribe, follow, and leave a rating on your podcast platform to help more people find the show.