The Breakup Debrief Podcast

Kelly H

The Breakup Debrief is your dose of healing truths, mindset shifts & coaching to help you stop waiting for closure & start rebuilding your self-worth. Hosted by Breakup Empowerment & Self Rediscovery Coach, Kelly Hunt, this show is for women ready to turn heartbreak into a whole new chapter. Expect real talk, relatable stories, lightbulb moments & the tools to reclaim the version of you that never needed them to choose you first <3

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Sunday · 11 min
#65 He's Amazing. So Are You. Stop Acting Like He's Out of Your League.
A short one this week. A snappy one. A tough love bestie one. Kelly was chatting to a client recently who is dating someone she describes as amazing. Incredible, actually. Smart, kind, successful, the works. & instead of being excited about it, she was terrified. Because she was convinced he was out of her league. So Kelly has some things to say about that. You'll hear: ✨ Why meeting someone amazing should feel exciting,not like a threat ✨ The difference between putting someone on a pedestal & genuinely feeling like you can't measure up ✨ Why that feeling of inadequacy almost always comes back to the same thing- self-worth ✨ The counterproductive cycle of people-pleasing & shrinking yourself from the very beginning & why it sets you up for exactly what you're trying to avoid ✨ Why only egotistical arseholes & narcissists actually want a partner who worships them 😂 ✨ The sheet of paper exercise & why you'd call the person on it amazing until someone tells you it's you ✨ The most important question in dating & it's not "does he like me?" ✨ Why you can feel lucky & know you deserve it at the same time, both can coexist ✨ "If he's with you, he's choosing to be with you, so why do you think he's amazing but he can't make his own decisions?" ✨ Absa-f**king-lutely. Do I love myself? Yes. Do I think my partner is lucky to have me? Yes. Do I know I'm lucky to have him? Also yes. That's the goal 💚 He's amazing. And so are you. Get a grip ❤️‍🔥 Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
September 27 · 56 min
#64 From Rock Bottom to Barbie Dream House; Thilinie's Breakup Recovery Story
This week Kelly is joined by a very special guest- Thilinie, a past client of the Breakup Empowerment Programme, who has very generously agreed to come on & share her story. Six months ago, Thilinie was navigating one of the hardest periods of her life. She had lost her dad in January. Her "situationship" of almost two years ended over the phone on St. Patrick's Day with no explanation. She moved into a brand new house alone, an hour away from everyone she knew, in an area she had never lived in before, knowing nobody except her ex. And she was meant to be exchanging on that house the very next day. Today? She calls it her Barbie dream house ❤️‍🔥 You'll hear: ✨ Thilinie's full story; loss, a situationship ending, moving alone & starting completely from scratch ✨ What she was hoping coaching would give her & what it actually gave her that she didn't expect ✨ The limiting belief she had carried since childhood that she didn't even know was a limiting belief until they worked on it together ✨ How she went from T, the version of herself that threw everything into relationships & lost who she was- to Thilinie ❤️‍🔥 ✨ The anxious preoccupied attachment style she thought she already understood & what actually helped her change it ✨ Why knowing your attachment style isn't enough & what the missing piece actually is ✨ What her non-negotiables list looked like when she started & how Kelly very kindly told her that most of them were actually just bare minimum 😂 ✨ How dating feels completely different now & the very telling detail that she no longer scrolls back through old messages looking for validation ✨ Four coats of paint, a wardrobe room & a painter she is dating who was absolutely not allowed to touch a single wall 😂 ✨ Why time does not heal & what actually does ✨ Her advice for anyone who is thinking about getting support but is not sure if it is for them This one is for the girl who is in the thick of it & cannot see the other side yet. Thilinie can see it & she is sending you love from her Barbie dream house 🩷 Links and Resources 📧 Share your story for the Where Is She Now segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram and TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links and resources: Linktree
September 20 · 21 min
#63 Help, I Got Back With My Ex- A Breakup Coach's Honest Take
Yes, Kelly is a Breakup Empowerment Coach & no, she is not automatically against you getting back with your ex. This week she's saying what she actually thinks & it might surprise you. Two clients recently told her they'd gotten back with their ex. She was happy for both of them. Here's why- & here's what needs to be true for it to be a good decision. You'll hear: ✨ Why Kelly is not against getting back with your ex & what actually determines whether it's the right call ✨ The two clients who got back with their exes & why Kelly responded the way she did ✨ Why hoping you'll reconcile is a completely normal part of a breakup & when that hope eventually goes away ✨ The wrong reasons to go back: loneliness, fear, scarcity, ego, obligation. None of these are reasons ✨ The right reasons to go back & what making that decision from a place of security actually looks like ✨ Why you need to be okay on your own before you can go back & how you know you're there ✨ What needs to be different this time- the non-negotiables, the changes, the work ✨ Why the people in your life who are against it deserve to be heard- when to listen to them & when to make your own decision ✨ The "keep going back until you hate him" trend & why Kelly can't get behind it ✨ Disney is Disney. Real life is real life... &they are not the same thing 😂 Whatever you decide, Kelly is rooting for your happy ever after. Whether that's with him, with someone new or just with yourself💚 Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
September 13 · 28 min
#62 What Actually Helped Me Get Over My Breakups; My Real & Honest List
This week Kelly is getting personal- & practical! No frameworks, no science, no guest. Just Kelly, her matcha & an honest run through of the actual things that helped her get over her breakups & her exes. The real ones. The ones she still swears by. Some of them are basic. Most of them are basic. And that's kind of the point because the basics work! And when you're in the middle of heartbreak, sometimes you just need someone to remind you of that. You'll hear: ✨ Why no contact is still the single most important thing you can do & how Kelly implemented it even when it was killing her not to reach out ✨ The dinner photo she almost sent him & why you will always find the most ridiculous excuses to reach out ✨ Muting all his friends on Instagram & the one she didn't mute, which later came back to bite her in a very spectacular fashion ✨ Why a daily walk was her non-negotiable & how it helped her in ways she didn't even realise at the time ✨ The therapy she was already in & why going to therapy before a crisis hits is one of the smartest things you can do ✨ Leaning on her people; who she called, who she spent time with & why good company is genuinely one of the best medicines ✨ Getting out of the house & not sitting with it alone all day ✨ Why she didn't go on the apps straight away & what the apps actually give you vs. what they don't ✨ Making a new vision board & why shifting your focus back to yourself is everything ✨ Not going through old photos and messages; why it's a form of self-torture & what to do instead ✨ Journaling & why having a safe space for your thoughts matters more than you think ✨ Finding & spending time in her happy place and a challenge for you to find yours ✨ Testing out the Breakup Empowerment Program on herself during her second breakup & the tweaks she made as a result Some of these will resonate. Some won't. Take what works, leave what doesn't and if you have something that helped you that's not on this list, Kelly wants to know. Drop it in the comments or send a DM. We're not gatekeeping healing tips in here 💚 Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
September 6 · 13 min
#61 Wait, Am I the Codependent One? What It Is, Why It Happens & How to Break the Pattern
She thought she was the strong one. The one holding the relationship together. The one who had it all under control.And then a relationship counsellor looked her in the eye & said- you're the codependent one 🤯This week Kelly is getting personal again. She shares the moment she was introduced to the word codependency & the journey from confusion and offence to complete understanding of how it had quietly shaped her entire marriage.You'll hear:✨ The relationship counsellor session that changed everything & Kelly's very relatable reaction to being told she was the codependent one✨ What codependency actually is & why it can be so easy to mistake it for love, devotion or just being a good partner✨ The difference between anxious attachment & codependency and why one is usually the root of the other✨ Why doing everything, managing everything & holding everything together is not strength, it's a sign✨ What it actually feels like to be the one always giving & never having your own needs fully met✨ The practical steps to start breaking codependent patterns, even if right now you can only notice them & not change them yet✨ How Kelly knows she did the work & what her life looks like now compared to a few years ago (Grey's Anatomy, pyjamas, face mask, no men changing the channel to golf 😂)✨ Why the relationship she has now is so much better because both people have their own identityWhether you're in a relationship, coming out of one, or just trying to understand your own patterns a little better, this episode is for you 💚Links & Resources📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
August 30 · 52 min
#60 All Things Dating: Ireland's Leading Matchmaker Mairéad Loughman on Finding Love After a Breakup
If you've been doing the healing work & you're starting to think about what comes next, this episode is your sign!This week Kelly sits down with Mairéad Loughman, Ireland's leading professional matchmaker & founder of Love HQ, who has helped close to 12,000 people find love since 2016. Mairéad brings the warmth, the wisdom, the straight talk — and the occasional absolutely hilarious reality check that you didn't know you needed ❤️‍🔥Whether you're freshly out of a breakup, have been single for longer than you'd like, or are just dipping your toe back into the dating world- this conversation is for you.You'll hear:✨ How matchmaking actually works in Ireland & why Mairéad thinks it's the country's best kept secret✨ Cuffing season is real & Mairéad's insider tip on exactly when to ramp up your dating game✨ Why so many women find themselves barely dating in their late thirties & the one pattern Mairéad sees almost every single time✨ How to know when you're actually ready to start dating again after a breakup✨ Masculine & feminine energy in dating, what it actually means, why it matters, & Kelly's very relatable story about a first date that went badly wrong✨ Why you should get your photos taken now while the sun is still out 😂✨ The ick- when to listen to it & when to absolutely ignore it✨ Why you need to stop talking to your friends about your relationship & who to talk to instead✨ Your standards aren't too high. His behaviour is too low ❤️‍🔥✨ How to communicate your standards early without being a "nag" & the two types of men you'll meet when you do✨ Why the most important decision you will ever make is who you choose to have children with✨ Some of the best days of your life are yet to happen ❤️‍🔥Find Mairéad:🌐 lovehq.ie📲 Instagram & TikTok: @lovehq.ie🎙️ Podcasts: Would Like to Meet & Tough Love with Stephanie ReganLinks & Resources📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
August 23 · 17 min
#59 The Fear of Falling in Love Again After a Breakup
You've done some healing. Time has passed. And now you're starting to think about the future, about maybe meeting someone again, opening up, falling in love. & then that thought arrives. What if it doesn't work out either? What if you go through all of that again, the trust, the vulnerability, the plans, the investment & you end up right back here, heartbroken all over again? This week Kelly is talking about that fear. The one that doesn't get spoken about enough. The one she cried about in a women's circle a few months after her own breakup. & the one she knows thousands of people are carrying too. You'll hear: ✨ The memory that prompted this episode, Kelly opening up in a women's circle about her fear of putting herself out there again & the girl across the circle who said she felt it too ✨ Why this fear makes complete, primitive, neurological sense & the iron plate analogy that explains it perfectly ✨ The difference between staying single because you genuinely want to and staying single because you're scared- & why only one of those is okay ✨ Why the goal is not to stop the fear, it's to feel it & do it anyway ✨ The one thing that will actually help you overcome it & it has nothing to do with finding the right person ✨ Why Kelly's second breakup was worse than her divorce, but why she recovered from it faster ✨ The foundation concept- what it is, how to build it & why it means that if things go wrong again, you won't be starting from zero ✨ The role of vulnerability in new relationships & how Kelly had to consciously push herself to be open again after her marriage ended ✨ Why love is still worth it- even knowing the risk Some things are worth the fear. Love is one of them 💚 Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
August 16 · 14 min
#58 Why You Stayed in a Relationship That Wasn't Good For You & Why You Need to Stop Blaming Yourself
Why did I stay so long? Why did I let it go that far? I should have seen it sooner. I should have left sooner. If you've ever said any of those things to yourself, this episode is for you. This week, prompted by a listener question, Kelly is tackling one of the most common things that comes up with her clients, the shame of staying. Why we do it, why it makes complete sense, & why you need to stop kicking yourself for it right now. You'll hear: ✨ Why staying in a relationship you know isn't right for you doesn't make you weak or stupid, it makes you human ✨ Why you can see your friend's situation clearly but can't see your own & the emotional investment that explains it ✨ The real reasons women stay; anxious attachment, low self-worth, sunk cost, biological clock, fear of being alone & the one that catches almost everyone: potential ✨ Why being a fixer & seeing potential in someone is one of the most common reasons women stay far longer than they should ✨ The difference between a hard relationship worth working on & one where you're the only one doing the work ✨ The compassion tool; how to treat yourself the way you'd treat your best friend if she came to you with this exact story ✨ What to do if you have a friend who you can see should leave & why telling her to leave is probably making things worse ✨ How to actually help her instead You loved him. What else were you supposed to do? Stop carrying the shame of staying. You're out now & that's all that matters 💚 Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
August 9 · 36 min
#57 When Your Partner Lies About Drugs- Lying, Betrayal & Social Pressure
⚠️ Trigger warning: this episode discusses drug use, lies & betrayal in relationships. If this is a sensitive topic for you, please take care of yourself first. A first for The Breakup Debrief & a deeply personal one. This week Kelly is talking about something that shaped a huge part of her own relationships & marriage, and something that has come up recently with a client- drug use, lying & the very specific kind of betrayal that comes when a partner hides a habit they know you don't want in your relationship. No judgment here for anyone who uses drugs. This episode is not about that. This is about the lying. The hiding. The gaslighting. And the way being made to feel like the controlling one can make you question your own completely reasonable boundaries. You'll hear: ✨ Kelly's own experience with drug use & lying in her ten-year relationship &marriage- and how it became less about the weed & more about the betrayal ✨ How an entire friend group was recruited to keep a secret & how the situation was framed to make Kelly look controlling rather than lied to ✨ The moment that changed everything & led to couples counselling before the wedding ✨ Why "I didn't tell you because I didn't want to upset you" is not protection, it's manipulation ✨ How hiding something until feelings are involved & it's harder to leave is also a form of manipulation- even when it's not conscious ✨ Why your boundaries around drug use are completely valid & you don't have to justify them to anyone ✨ The difference between the drugs & the lying and why you're entitled to treat them as two completely separate issues ✨ The murder analogy that will make complete sense when you hear it 😂 ✨ Why if your partner doesn't want to be in a relationship with someone who does drugs, that is their decision to make- full stop Your values don't have to match exactly. But they do need to align. And you never have to change yours just because someone else thinks you should 💚 Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
August 2 · 14 min
#56 Holding a Grudge Against Your Ex Is Only Hurting You- Time to Let It Go
You might hate Kelly a little during this episode, she's prepared for that, but she needs you to hear her out. This week Kelly is talking about the grudge. The anger you're still carrying. The flash of rage when someone mentions his name. The replaying, the revisiting, the weight of it all. And the uncomfortable truth, he's not lying awake at night thinking about how angry you are. He's just living his life & the only person carrying all of that weight is you. You'll hear: ✨ Why holding a grudge feels like you're doing something but is actually only draining you ✨ The real reason we hold onto anger after a breakup & why it makes sense ✨ Why the grudge can feel like justice, like significance, like not letting him away with it but why none of that is actually going where you think it is ✨ The big word that makes everyone uncomfortable- "forgiveness" and what Kelly actually means by it ✨ Why forgiving him does not mean what he did was okay, that he deserves it or that he gets access to you again ✨ His access to you and your forgiveness are two completely different things & they don't need to touch each other ✨ Kelly's own experience letting go of the anger towards her ex-husband & the person in her life who couldn't understand it ✨ Why forgiveness is one of the final stages of healing, not something to rush to or skip ahead to ✨ What to do if you're still neck-deep in the anger & why that's completely okay too He's not losing sleep over your grudge but you might be & you deserve that energy back💚 Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
July 26 · 38 min
#55 Who Is Kelly? Reintroducing Myself & The Breakup Debrief
If you're new here- welcome! Pull up a chair, grab your matcha & let Kelly tell you everything 🤭 & if you've been here since the beginning, you might still want to listen to this one. Because over a year in, with new listeners joining every week, Kelly is doing a reintroduction. Her story, her why & everything that led her to sitting behind this microphone every Monday. This episode covers it all the ten-year relationship that started at sixteen, the six-month marriage, the wedding night she spent alone in the smoking area in her wedding dress, the relationship that came after & the work she had to do on herself before she finally found what she'd always been looking for. You'll hear: ✨ Why Kelly started The Breakup Debrief & where the name actually came from ✨ The ten-year relationship that started at sixteen, growing up together & breaking up ✨ The wedding that almost didn't happen because of COVID & the wedding night that told her everything she needed to know ✨ The moment she knew the marriage was over & how she found the courage to leave ✨ The relationship that came after- what she thought was healing & what it actually was ✨ The work she did on herself in between- therapy, coaching & getting to know who she actually was outside of a relationship ✨ Her current relationship; how it feels different, what it has that the others didn't & why she finally believes she deserves it ✨ The message she wants every listener to hear who is currently in the thick of it- whether you're heartbroken, healing, single, or somewhere in between ✨ Your Alan is coming. She met hers on Tinder. There is hope! 💚 Whether you're showing up today feeling great or feeling a bit sh*t, this is a safe space for all of it & Kelly is so glad you're here Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
July 19 · 19 min
#54 Healing From Lies in a Relationship- It's not your shame to carry
Sometimes you're in a relationship & you know there are a lot of lies- you're wading through them, trying to make sense of them, trying to recover from them. And sometimes you go through a breakup & you didn't even realise how many lies there were until time passes, things unravel & you find yourself looking back at a relationship wondering what was actually real. Both scenarios add a very specific, very painful layer to a breakup. And this week, Kelly is talking about it. You'll hear: ✨ Why being lied to in a relationship is a whole different kind of grief because you're also grieving the reality you thought you had ✨ The self-blame spiral that comes with being lied to & why the finger needs to be pointed firmly at the liar, not at you ✨ The difference between big lies & the small, consistent, purposeless lies and why both do damage ✨ Gaslighting- how it goes hand in hand with lying & why it's so hard to recover from ✨ Why "I didn't tell you because I didn't want to hurt you" is actually just someone avoiding the consequences of their own actions ✨ Why lying is a form of control &why the person being lied to is never the one in the wrong ✨ The shame & embarrassment of being lied to and why that shame belongs to the liar, not to you ✨ How to rebuild trust in yourself before worrying about trusting anyone else ✨ Why going into new relationships with your eyes open is not the same as going in with your walls up ✨ Trust is built through trustworthy actions & what that actually looks like in practice The shame is not yours to carry. The embarrassment is not yours to carry. If you saw the best in him & chose to trust him- that says everything good about you and everything bad about him 💚 Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
July 12 · 52 min
#53 One Year of the Podcast; Kelly's Brother Tells All (P.2)
He's back & this time he brought ChatGPT 😂Part 2 of the one year special with baby bro Ian is here & it does not disappoint. We pick up right where we left off, with Ian sharing how he coped in the early stages of his own breakup (terribly, at the start, terribly) & dive straight into the chaos from there.You'll hear:✨ Ian's honest account of how he actually coped & what ended up helping him most✨ The embarrassment of walking away from an engagement & why it absolutely should not have felt that way✨ How Kelly was Ian's inspiration when leaving his relationship & became his proof that things get better✨ Whether men are actually getting better at talking about their feelings (Ian has thoughts & a very specific breakdown of the different types of men 😂)✨ ChatGPT as emotional support- Ian's confession & Kelly's reaction✨ The red flag green flag rapid fire round ✨ Breakup songs- which ones got them through it & why crying in the car is genuinely great therapy✨ Ian's final words of wisdom for anyone going through a breakup right now✨ Ian's Instagram handle for any single, attractive gay men in their late twenties to early thirties 👀Thank you for an incredible year. We love you for being here ❤️‍🔥Links & Resources📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
July 5 · 43 min
#52 One Year of the Podcast; Kelly's Brother Tells All (P.1)
One year, 52 episodes & to celebrate Kelly's brought in her favourite guest- baby bro Ian 🎉 This is the episode you didn't know you needed. Equal parts chaotic, hilarious, emotional & genuinely insightful because who better to give you the real story on Kelly's breakup journey than the person who had front row seats to all of it? In Part 1 of this special one year episode, Kelly & Ian get into Kelly's breakup history from Ian's perspective, what it was really like supporting her from the inside & Ian's own breakup & healing journey earlier this year. You'll hear: ✨ Ian's honest take on Kelly's exes- including which one he liked least ✨ The "I told you so" moment Ian had been sitting on & the story that goes with it ✨ What supporting Kelly through her breakups was actually like from the inside ✨ What Ian would tell anyone who is supporting a loved one through a breakup right now ✨ What it was like going through a breakup with a sister who is a Breakup Empowerment Coach & whether it actually helped ✨ How Ian handled telling people about his breakup when he wanted to keep it private ✨ The moment Ian sat Kelly down & kept saying "it gets worse"- and it kept getting worse ✨ How Ian coped in the early stages of his own breakup- spoiler: not well 😂 Part 2 coming next week & trust us, you'll want to tune in for that one too 💚 Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
June 21 · 13 min
#51 Seeking Male Validation After a Breakup- Why We Do It & How to Stop
Okay, be honest. After your breakup, did you jump back on the apps not because you were ready to date, but because you just needed someone to find you attractive? Did you post that selfie & spend the next hour checking who'd seen it? Did you find yourself flirting with someone you weren't even interested in, just for the attention? No judgment here. Kelly has been there too and this week she's getting into all of it. Episode 50 is the male validation episode- how we seek it, why we seek it & most importantly how we stop needing it from everyone else & start giving it to ourselves instead. You'll hear: ✨ The subtle ways seeking male validation shows up & why it doesn't always look like what you think ✨ Why your dopamine & oxytocin crash after a breakup makes validation-seeking completely understandable & what your brain is actually trying to do ✨ Why external validation is like a sugar rush & why it will never actually fill the gap ✨ How chasing validation from men is quietly delaying your healing without you even realising it ✨ Why the right person cannot fix a validation wound & what happens when you make them try ✨ The self-awareness tool that is always the first step ✨ Practical ways to start validating yourself- including the affirmation you can use even if the big ones feel like a lie right now ✨ The difference between enjoying a compliment & depending on one You knew you looked good in that photo. That's why you posted it. This episode is your reminder that you don't need anyone else to confirm it 💚 Also, Kelly introduces something new in this episode. The Breakup Clarity Call. A 90-minute one-to-one call for anyone who isn't sure about full coaching yet but needs some guidance, a bit of a chin wag & a clear action plan for what comes next. Details on Instagram. Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
June 14 · 18 min
#50 Off Campus & What It Taught Us About the Relationships We Actually Deserve
Have you watched Off Campus yet? Because if you haven't, go & watch it and then come back. This week Kelly is talking about the show that has taken over the internet & more importantly, the conversation it's opened up about healthy relationships, what we've been conditioned to expect from men & why so many of us were sitting watching it fully braced for the worst. ⚠️ Spoiler warning: this episode does discuss specific scenes from the show. You'll hear: ✨ Why Off Campus has been described online as a form of generational therapy ✨ The moments in the show where viewers were expecting toxicity, drama & blow-ups- & what it means that we were so ready for it ✨ How years of TV shows & movies have quietly taught us that jealousy means love, moodiness is romantic & chaos is passion ✨ The specific green flags in the show that felt radical but really shouldn't be ✨ Why "are you okay?" instead of a blow-up should be the standard, not the exception ✨ What it means if you watched this show & felt genuinely healed by it ✨ Kelly's comparison to Nobody Wants This- another show getting it right ✨ Why these men do actually exist & what to do if you haven't found yours yet ✨ A teaser for an upcoming episode with a very special guest (hint: he's single, thriving & smashing the gym 😂) The bar is not high, girls. Garrett Graham is not an impossibly perfect man. He just communicates, doesn't make everything about his ego & treats the woman he's with like she matters. That's it. That's the standard & this episode is your reminder to stop settling for anything less 💚 Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
June 7 · 13 min
#49 Why You're Addicted to the Situationship & How to Finally Walk Away
You know it's going nowhere. You've known for months. Your friends have told you. You've told yourself. And yet, here you still are. This week Kelly is talking about the situationship. Not to tell you what to do- she's not going to sit here and say "know your worth" & expect that to magically fix anything. She knows it's not that simple. Some of these guys have a GRIP! And today she's explaining exactly why. You'll hear: ✨ Why situationships can be a form of addiction and the psychology behind why you literally cannot logic your way out of them ✨ Intermittent reinforcement- the most powerful psychological hook there is & why it's the exact reason his three-day silence followed by one text sends you into a tizzy✨ Why the butterflies you feel in a situationship are actually anxiety in disguise ✨ The attachment style connection- why anxiously attached women are the most likely to end up in situationships & the least likely to thrive in them ✨ How the situationship becomes a form of self-sabotage & why it's easier to blame his unavailability than face the real fear underneath ✨ The danger of potential- why you're not in love with him, you're in love with who he could be ✨ The sunk cost trap & why "I'm already ten months in" is never a good enough reason to stay ✨ How to actually get yourself out of the loop- the honest, practical, no-fluff version ✨ Why consistency might feel boring at first & why that's important information about your attachment style, not your compatibility You are not silly for being in this. But you do deserve so much more than an almost & this episode is your reminder of that! ❤️‍🔥 Links & Resources📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
May 31 · 13 min
#48 Are You Actually Healed Or Are You Just Numb?
You've stopped crying. You've deleted the photos. You haven't checked his Instagram in three whole weeks. You're going to the gym, seeing your friends, getting on with life. So why does something still feel just… off? In this week's episode, Kelly asks the question that nobody else is asking: are you actually healed or are you just numb? Because numb is not the destination, girls. Life is for living. You'll hear: ✨ What healing actually looks like and more importantly, what it doesn't ✨ The difference between being genuinely over it and being dismissive of a whole chapter of your life ✨ The signs that you might be numb rather than healed — and why it is not your fault ✨ Why your nervous system can go into full shutdown mode after prolonged stress or trauma — and the science behind why it turns everything down, not just the pain ✨ The Vampire Diaries analogy nobody asked for but absolutely needed 🧛 ✨ Five questions to ask yourself to figure out which one you're actually in ✨ Why hustle culture and social media are making it harder to actually heal — and easier to perform healing instead ✨ Practical ways to gently reactivate your nervous system and come back to yourself ✨ Why you have to go backwards before you can go forwards This episode might confirm that you're doing better than you think. Or it might be the thing that finally helps you name what's been going on. Either way, you deserve to feel your life to its full extent. And this is your reminder that you can get there ❤️‍🔥 Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
May 24 · 18 min
#47 Clingy, Needy, Too Much: Reframing the Labels Women Are Given in Relationships
Has someone ever said something to you in a relationship, just one throwaway comment, that you then carried around for years without ever questioning it? In this week's episode, Kelly gets personal. She shares the story of the word that her ex-husband used to describe her that stuck like a label for years, the way it quietly shaped how she saw herself, how she showed up in relationships and how she eventually challenged it & reframed it entirely. This one is for anyone who has taken on a label from an ex, a past relationship or even just someone's passing opinion & started to believe it was the truth about who they are. You'll hear: ✨ Kelly's personal story of being called "clingy" in her marriage and why she accepted it as her identity without ever questioning it ✨ How one throwaway comment from an ex can become a deeply held belief about yourself ✨ The therapy moment that made her stop and ask but is it actually true? ✨ How to take your limiting beliefs to court & look at the real evidence ✨ Why words like clingy, needy, emotional & psycho are thrown at women far too freely and why they say more about the person using them than the person being labelled ✨ How to reframe a negative label into something that actually reflects who you are ✨ Why nobody on this planet knows you better than you know yourself And yes, she also announces that she would rather be someone's matcha than their cup of tea. A t-shirt may be incoming 🍵 This episode is your sign to look at the labels you're carrying, figure out where they came from, take them to court and decide for yourself which ones are actually true. Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree
May 17 · 47 min
#46 Dopamine, Heartbreak & Why You're Not Crazy: The Science of a Breakup
Have you ever wondered why a breakup can feel so physically unbearable? The nausea, the chest pain, the inability to eat or sleep, the spiralling thoughts that won't switch off- and on top of all of that, the shame of feeling like it shouldn't be this hard? In this week's episode, Kelly breaks down exactly what is happening inside your brain and body when a relationship ends- and why it is quite literally the same neurological experience as going through a drug withdrawal. This one is backed by science, packed with practical tools & might just be the most validating episode yet. You'll hear: ✨ Why your brain in love looks identical to a brain high on cocaine and what that means for your healing ✨ The three feel-good chemicals (dopamine, oxytocin & serotonin) that your relationship was giving you — and what happens when they're suddenly cut off ✨ Why you can't stop checking his Instagram, rereading old messages, or looking for excuses to reach out — it's not weakness, it's neuroscience ✨ How your nervous system loses its main source of co-regulation when a relationship ends — and why that sends you into survival mode ✨ The role of cortisol in your breakup spiral — and the simple daily habits that help bring it back down ✨ Breathwork techniques (including the physiological sigh) that are scientifically proven to activate your parasympathetic nervous system fast ✨ How to redirect your dopamine cravings instead of white-knuckling through them ✨ Why you need both space to feel it and space to step away from it — and how to find that balance If you've ever thought "why am I being like this?" after a breakup, this episode is your answer. There is nothing wrong with you. Your brain is doing exactly what it was wired to do. Links & Resources 📧 Share your story for the "Where Is She Now?" segment: info@kellyskoaching.com 📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching 🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree

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