What If Your Body Was Never the Problem?
My 33-Year Journey Through Eating Disorders, Body Dysmorphia & Healing What if the thing you’ve spent years trying to control was never really the problem? For 33 years, I lived with eating disorders and body dysmorphia. What began as a little girl noticing that her body looked different eventually became decades of restriction, comparison, perfectionism, shame, and an exhausting mental battle with food and my body. But underneath those behaviors was a much deeper story. In this episode of Reclaiming Your Light, I’m sharing a deeply personal conversation originally recorded with my friend Kara Stoltenberg for her podcast, Stepping In with Kara. Kara takes me back to some of the earliest moments that shaped my relationship with myself: experiencing body shame as a child, being bullied in middle school, growing up in an unpredictable home, searching for love and acceptance, and eventually discovering that controlling my body had become one of the ways I tried to create safety when life around me didn’t feel safe. We also talk about the moment motherhood forced me to look at the patterns I was still carrying. I began realizing that my children weren’t only going to hear what I told them about their bodies and their worth. They were going to watch how I treated mine. That realization changed something in me. This conversation explores my experience with breathwork and somatic healing, the deeper layers I began uncovering beneath my eating disorders and body dysmorphia, and what it has meant to build a relationship with my body that is no longer rooted in punishment, fear, or control. My healing experience is my own, and I don’t believe there is one path, modality, or timeline that looks the same for everyone. But I do believe our patterns deserve curiosity before judgment. So as you listen, I invite you to consider: What have you been judging yourself for that may have once helped you survive? Where has control become synonymous with safety? And what might change if you stopped asking, “What’s wrong with me?” and started asking, “What does my body need to feel safe?” You don’t need to have experienced an eating disorder to recognize yourself in this conversation. Your pattern might be people pleasing, perfectionism, overthinking, overworking, staying small, or always needing to be the strong one. Whatever brought you here, I hope this episode reminds you that you are more than the patterns you learned to survive. A heartfelt thank you to my friend Kara Stoltenberg for holding such a compassionate and curious space for this conversation. This interview originally appeared on her podcast, Stepping In with Kara, and I’m so grateful to bring it into the Reclaiming Your Light space. If Kara’s voice and the way she holds conversation resonate with you, I’d love for you to continue the connection. Listen to Stepping In with Kara wherever you listen to podcasts, and follow Kara on Instagram at @karastoltenberg. Connect with Kara: Instagram: @karastoltenberg Podcast: Stepping In with Kara Content note: This episode includes conversations about eating disorders, body dysmorphia, bullying, abuse, disordered eating behaviors, and suicidal thoughts. Please take care of yourself while listening and seek professional support when needed. Until next time… keep reclaiming your light. --- Let's stay connected!!! bio.site/therachelgossett

