Quiet Superpowers

How do you improve at speaking unprepared

This is the second episode of the three-part series on how to improve at speaking without preparation. Last episode we looked at the reasons we often find it difficult to speak without preparation. And this episode explores the tools, tactics, and methods you can use to essentially always be prepared! David JP Phillips TED Talk: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nj-hdQMa3uA Simon Sinek, Styrofoam Cup: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FNf1pKRhay8 Books mentioned: 1. Building a Second Brain, Tiago Forte 2. Taking Smart Notes, Sonke Ahrens Note-taking app I use: Obsidian (https://obsidian.md/) - I use this for all writing/podcast notes (in addition to a physical bullet-journal) - https://bulletjournal.com/pages/book As always - let me know if you have any questions, thoughts, ideas, I'd love to hear them!

Why do we struggle when speaking unprepared?

This episode is the first in a new three-part topic- on speaking on the spot. The type of speaking you do when you haven’t had chance to prepare. This is the first episode of this topic, where we explore the question of why we often find it so difficult to speak without preparation. We look at the most common psychological challenges that cause this, as well as the common mistakes we make that reduce our confidence and ability to speak well on the spot. This episode is focused on building self-awareness around speaking unprepared. And the following 2 episodes in this topic will look at practical methods and tools we can use in any situation where we don't have time to prepare. Hope you enjoy :) Apologies if there is a little background noise in this one... I stupidly left my window open whilst recording...! As always- let me know if you have any comments, feedback, ideas, questions!

Will I still be heard if I'm not opinionated?

This episode stems from a discussion I had with someone about that balance between having opinions and being heard. I was interested by how often those with more extreme views/opinions tend to be heard by more people. Possibly not respected by more people. But they reach more people. And whilst I didn't like the idea that someone could gain "reputation" for extreme opinions, it made me think about how I have often lacked having any strong opinions on anything...! These are the lessons I learnt about holding opinions over the past couple of years. I'm breaking down the importance of having opinions - which are critical for healthy living, successful relationships, and overcoming fear of judgement! I also dive into the tactics you can use to express your opinions more. Hopefully this is helpful :)

Some thoughts and realisations

Hello - this is a very different format for an episode. I was away last week - as you'll hear from the episode - and I wanted to share some of my thoughts since then :) Hope you enjoy this slightly different episode. In researching this episode, I also found out about "attention restoration" - which is that when we constantly direct our focus - solving problems, reacting to things, making decisions - we drain our mental resources. This can feel like mental fog - it really did for me. And I felt completely exhausted. But exposure to restorative environments - especially nature - replenishes that attention. This explains why you can often feel so good after a break or holiday from a busy work life. Thank you! As always - feel free to reach out for any questions, comments, ideas, feedback :) guyroberts2102@gmail.com

• Transcript

How do I move past small talk into better conversation?

In this episode - we look at small talk, and how to progress from small talk into deep talk, or big talk, or however you want to call this. I've struggled with being on both the receiving end of small talk, and feeling like I have to get good at it multiple times throughout my life. I've never quite understood it. So I took some time to research what makes good small talk, as well as how we actually move away from it, into better, more fun, and more fulfilling conversations. Some articles that I reference: https://thequietlife.net/p/how-to-turn-small-talk-into-big-talk https://hbr.org/2021/03/remote-workers-need-small-talk-too

What does confidence look like if I'm not trying to be loud?

Confidence is very often misunderstood. There's a type of confidence that involves creating a facade to try and prove something to people, But there's also a more subtle form of confidence - quiet confidence - that means you are calm and collected during the storms. There's a difference between being confident, and feeling confident, which we explore in this episode. We look at practical steps you can take to build your confidence, regardless of where you're currently at with it. Piano Improv: Today's piano was heavily inspired by Sacrifice Piano Solo Version Seiji "Fish on Land" Ending by Keiichiro Shibuya. Recommend listening to this and similar songs if you enjoyed this one :) As always if you have any questions, feedback, comments etc. - feel free to email me at guyroberts2102@gmail.com

Why do I feel close to people but struggle to express it?

In this episode, we look at the question of closeness - why we can feel it, but not always be able to express it openly. Being close to people is one of those things that has never quite made sense to me. I had never really known if I was doing the "right" thing when I found it difficult to express. I think it's a challenge for many quiet people to be able to express this closeness without breaking your authenticity. Being able to be yourself whilst still showing to other people that you care about them, and that your quietness and/or introversion does not mean you're being distant. Listen to the full episode where we explore this question more deeply. As always - let me know if you have any comments or feedback for this episode. You can also email me at guyroberts21@outlook.com. In this episode I mentioned; Brene Brown - who has been mentioned in previous episodes! Neil Strauss - American Author

Why do I communicate so differently depending on who I'm with?

In this episode, within the series of questions that quiet people may ask themselves, we explore the question of why communication can be so different depending on who you're with. I've never understood why my communication can change significantly, when there is the addition or reduction of a single person. So I decided to explore this question! Episode mentions: 1- Quiet, Susan Cain: https://susancain.net/book/quiet/ 2- Brene Brown: https://brenebrown.com/ Apologies for the late release of this episode...! I was moving place, and had some difficulty with the recording setup. You'll notice the piano quality is also slightly different, as I was using an upright piano without any noise reduction, hope you enjoy the solo improv regardless!