Queer Talker

Ben Cicchetti

Queer Talker is a podcast celebrating the stories and journeys of LGBTQ+ individuals from all walks of life, from business leaders to celebrities and influencers. Through open and authentic conversations, we explore themes of identity, authenticity, and the power of living boldly.

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20 episodes
Updated Tuesday

Episodes20

Newest first

Tuesday · 53 min
Amanda Collier: The Traitors, Finding Her Tribe & Living Authentically
Amanda Collier became one of the breakout stars of The Traitors after delivering one of the season’s most memorable lines: “I can’t be Hugo’s wife. Don’t be so ridiculous. I’m a lesbian.” But behind that joyful moment is a much bigger story of resilience, public service, representation and finding your purpose. In this episode of Queer Talker, Amanda joins Ben Cicchetti to reflect on growing up in a working-class family, being bullied at school, and spending three decades in the Metropolitan Police, where she eventually became a Detective Chief Inspector. Amanda opens up about navigating homophobia within the police in the early 1990s, finding the mentor who helped her keep going, and eventually becoming a leader to some of the people who had once bullied her. She also takes us inside The Traitors, from nearly joining an earlier series to immediately suspecting Stephen, almost saving herself from elimination, and watching her spontaneous declaration of being a lesbian become a powerful moment of visibility for LGBTQ+ viewers. Amanda also discusses the heart condition discovered during the casting process, why she now approaches fitness and life differently, and how the platform she gained from the show has helped her support charities, speak to young people and encourage others to find their tribe. Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Amanda's early life 01:58 Amanda's childhood and discovering her identity 08:57 Her police career and navigating being LGBTQ+ in law enforcement 17:58 Joining The Traitors and iconic moments 35:05 Amanda's impact as a role model and advocate 49:49 Her diagnosis with hereditary heart disease and future plans 54:09 Final advice and closing thoughts Connect with Ben Cicchetti: Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/ YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchetti TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
July 14 · 51 min
Charlie Craggs: Joy, Authenticity & Fighting Back
Charlie Craggs is an award-winning author, activist and the creator of Nail Transphobia, the campaign that used free manicures to start conversations about trans lives. In this episode of Queer Talker, Charlie joins Ben Cicchetti for one of the most honest and uplifting conversations yet. Together they discuss growing up, bullying, finding authenticity, the importance of representation, why Nadia Almada changed Charlie’s life, and why humour can be one of the most powerful forms of activism. Charlie also reveals exclusively that Nail Transphobia is returning, shares details of her next book, and explains why she refuses to let anyone take away her joy. They also discuss: Growing up as a queer child Being bullied at school Nadia Almada and Big Brother Finding authenticity Nail Transphobia Trans rights in 2026 Social media and activism Standing up for yourself Why joy is an act of resistance A funny, emotional and incredibly empowering conversation. Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Queer Panic 00:26 First album and music memories 01:21 Lip sync song choice and queer media favorites 01:59 Favorite queer icons and representation 03:06 Meeting Nadia Almada and her impact 08:27 Nadia Almada’s victory and representation 09:07 Young Charlie’s understanding of gender and identity 11:01 Media treatment of trans people over decades 13:28 Trans rights and societal progress 16:48 Trans men in society and bathroom debates 21:23 Authenticity and self-acceptance journey 23:36 The Nail Transphobia campaign’s origins and impact 35:32 Upcoming book and advocacy plans 45:31 Advice to younger self and resilience 48:18 Protecting joy and handling negativity 50:30 Closing remarks and gratitude Connect with Ben Cicchetti: Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/ YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchetti TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
June 30 · 51 min
Simon Blake OBE: Stonewall, Thriving & Backing Yourself
Simon Blake OBE has dedicated much of his life to making the world a safer, fairer place for LGBTQ+ people. As CEO of Stonewall, one of the world’s most influential LGBTQ+ organisations, Simon joins Ben Cicchetti for a thoughtful and deeply personal conversation about authenticity, activism, hope and why our goal should never simply be to survive, but to thrive. Simon reflects on growing up in Cornwall in the 1970s, the first time he saw himself represented on screen, coming out to his parents, and the powerful words his father shared years later: “I’m so glad that you gave us the chance to love you in all of you.” We also discuss: The role and future of Stonewall LGBTQ+ rights in 2026 Why progress isn’t always linear Diversity, equity and inclusion Why representation matters The importance of empathy Social media and activism Leadership and trusting your gut Advice for young LGBTQ+ people Why we should aim to thrive, not just survive This is a conversation full of warmth, wisdom and hope from one of the most important voices in the LGBTQ+ community. Chapters 00:00 Introduction to Simon Blake and Queer Panic Questions 03:55 Childhood and Early Influences 08:11 Realizing Difference and LGBTQ+ Awareness 11:46 Authenticity and Coming Out Journey 15:58 Career Path and Leadership Insights 20:10 The Role of Stonewall and Personal Connection 23:40 Navigating the Culture War for LGBTQ+ Rights 26:42 Stonewall's Vision and Strategy for 2026 30:22 Balancing Urgency and Strategy in Advocacy 35:36 The Role of Businesses in Promoting Inclusion 39:46 The Impact of Politicization on LGBTQ+ Lives 47:56 Advice for the Younger LGBTQ+ Generation Connect with Ben Cicchetti: Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/ YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchetti TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
June 16 · 52 min
Joe McElderry: Love Me Out Loud, X Factor & Living Authentically
Joe McElderry first captured the hearts of the nation when he won The X Factor in 2009. But behind the headlines, chart success and sold-out tours was a young man still figuring out who he was. In this episode of Queer Talker, Joe joins Ben Cicchetti to reflect on the extraordinary journey from winning one of the UK’s biggest television shows to finding comfort in his own identity and creative voice. Joe opens up about navigating fame at just 18 years old, realising he was gay while living life in the public eye, and the surreal experience of seeing his coming out story splashed across the front page of every national newspaper. We also discuss his incredible career since The X Factor, performing with George Michael, the lessons he’s learned from nearly two decades in the music industry, and why turning 30 changed his perspective on success, authenticity and happiness. Plus, Joe shares the story behind his brilliant new single Love Me Out Loud, a heartbreak disco anthem inspired by artists like Robyn, Jessie Ware and Dua Lipa, and explains why now felt like the right time to return to pop music. Chapters 00:00 Introduction to Joe McElderry 03:00 The Creative Process Behind New Music 06:01 Memorable Moments from X Factor 08:57 The Impact of George Michael 12:04 Navigating Fame and Personal Identity 15:03 Coming Out Journey 17:53 Life After Winning X Factor 25:14 The Journey of a Music Career 26:14 Reflecting on 'Wide Awake' Album 29:20 Exploring Musical Versatility 31:52 Finding Authenticity in Performance 34:53 The Joy of New Music: 'Love Me Out Loud' 38:10 The Creative Process Behind 'Love Me Out Loud' 40:45 Queer Joy and Community Spirit 46:06 The Impact of 'That's Ridiculous' Podcast 50:11 Advice to Younger Self Connect with Ben Cicchetti: Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/ YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchetti TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
June 2 · 48 min
Matt Terry: X Factor, Coming Out & Finally Feeling Free
In this episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with X Factor winner and pop artist Matt Terry for his most open and honest conversation yet. Matt reflects on growing up feeling like he had to hide who he was, the pressure of trying to present as “straight enough,” and what it was really like being thrust into the spotlight on one of the biggest TV shows in the world at just 23 years old. He opens up about the rumours surrounding his sexuality during X Factor, feeling unprotected by the industry, and the emotional toll of trying to play a version of himself that never truly fit. Matt also shares the deeply personal story behind His Car, why Heartstopper meant so much to him, and how his new music including Skittles and Party In My Room represents freedom, joy, and finally feeling comfortable in his own skin. This episode is funny, emotional, nostalgic, and incredibly honest. A conversation about fame, identity, pressure, healing, and what happens when you stop performing for everyone else and finally become yourself. Chapters 00:00 Introduction to Matt Terry 02:18 Musical Inspirations and Collaborations 03:58 Queer Icons and Representation 04:40 X Factor Journey and Performances 05:49 The Meaning Behind 'Party in My Room' 06:18 Finding Identity and Self-Discovery 08:18 Musical Journey and Early Influences 10:26 Awareness of LGBTQ Figures 12:29 Experience on X Factor 17:10 Navigating Fame and Personal Struggles 20:06 Confidence on Stage 23:30 Performing 'Secret Love Song' and Its Impact 25:49 Winning X Factor and Its Aftermath 26:20 The Highs and Lows of Fame 30:04 Navigating the X Factor Experience 33:58 Finding My Voice: The Journey to Authenticity 38:17 His Car: A Personal Revelation 45:20 Being a Voice for the LGBTQIA+ Community 47:03 Advice to My Younger Self Connect with Ben Cicchetti: Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/ YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchetti TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
May 19 · 59 min
Karl Schmid: Living with HIV, U=U, and Why Stories Matter
In this episode of Queer Talker, Ben Cicchetti sits down with Emmy and GLAAD Award-winning creator, HIV activist, and Plus Life Media founder Karl Schmid for a deeply honest conversation about identity, stigma, survival, and hope. Karl opens up about growing up between Australia, Fiji, New Zealand and the UK, his early experiences in the entertainment world through his brother’s fame on Neighbours, and how those experiences shaped the person he is today. The conversation then turns deeply personal as Karl reflects on discovering his sexuality, internalised shame growing up during the AIDS crisis, and the lasting impact of being diagnosed HIV positive at 27 years old. He shares the fear, stigma, and silence he carried for years, including why he kept his diagnosis private for nearly a decade. Karl also explains the life-changing impact of the U=U message (Undetectable = Untransmittable), why HIV stigma still exists in 2026, and how creating Plus Life Media became part of his healing journey. The episode also explores: * Why storytelling matters in LGBTQ+ communities * The importance of HIV education and visibility * Internalised stigma and rebuilding self-worth * HIV Unwrapped and bringing HIV conversations to New York Fashion Week * Why hope is essential for survival This is a powerful, vulnerable, and deeply human conversation about survival, visibility, and creating spaces where people feel seen. Chapters 00:00 Introduction to Carl Schmid and His Work 02:57 Exploring Carl's International Upbringing 05:56 The Impact of Celebrity and Family on Carl's Career 08:55 Navigating Early Awareness of LGBTQ+ Identity 12:07 Personal Journey of Self-Discovery and Authenticity 18:13 Coming Out as HIV Positive and Its Impact 24:05 The Importance of Storytelling in HIV Awareness 27:02 Understanding the 'You Equals You' Message 28:58 Trust Issues in the Medical System 29:53 The Impact of U=U on Personal Health 31:21 Overcoming Internalized Stigma 35:38 Building Healthy Relationships 36:45 The Mission of Plus Life Media 39:31 Changing the Narrative Around HIV 42:20 The Importance of Education and Visibility 46:03 HIV Unwrapped: Fashion Meets Science 50:12 Reflecting on Personal and Professional Growth 54:54 Advice for the Younger Self and the Newly Diagnosed Connect with Ben Cicchetti: Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/ YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchetti TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
May 5 · 39 min
Yasmin Benoit: Asexuality, Representation, and Challenging What People Expect
In this episode of Queer Talker, Ben Cicchetti sits down with model, writer and asexuality advocate Yasmin Benoit for a powerful conversation about identity, visibility, and challenging assumptions. Yasmin shares what it really means to be asexual, breaking down common misconceptions and explaining the difference between sexual attraction, libido, and how people experience identity. She opens up about growing up feeling different, being labelled by others before she had the language to define herself, and how discovering the term “asexual” both resonated and created new challenges due to a lack of representation. The conversation explores the reality of representation, from the stereotypes often associated with asexuality to why the community is still in its “early stages” compared to broader LGBTQ+ visibility. Yasmin also shares how her work as a model has challenged people’s expectations of what asexuality “looks like”, and why that contrast has made her both visible and controversial. They also discuss intersectionality, the unique experience of being a Black asexual woman, and the barriers that still exist both within and outside LGBTQ+ spaces. This is an honest, insightful and often eye-opening conversation that challenges assumptions and expands understanding. Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Queer Panic Round 04:26 Nostalgia and Childhood Reflections 07:31 Understanding Asexuality 10:33 Personal Journey to Asexuality 13:39 Navigating Identity and Representation 16:45 Challenging Stereotypes of Asexuality 18:57 Asexuality in Mainstream Media 23:40 Controversial Representation and Identity 30:43 Intersectionality and Asexuality 33:46 Navigating Online Hate and Advocacy 36:46 Advice to Younger Self and LGBTQIA+ Youth Connect with Ben Cicchetti: Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/ YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchetti TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
April 21 · 43 min
Zelah Glasson: Big Brother, Identity, and the Reality of Being Trans on TV
In this episode of Queer Talker, Ben Cicchetti sits down with Zelah Glasson, known to many from Big Brother, for a raw and honest conversation about identity, visibility, and what it really means to live authentically. Zelah opens up about a chaotic childhood, being nearly kicked out of multiple schools, and the early signs of identity that showed up long before he had the language to understand them. From shouting “I’m a boy” on the playground to navigating years of confusion, suppression, and self-discovery, his journey is anything but straightforward. They explore Zelah’s experience of realising he was trans later in life, and why his transition felt gradual rather than a single defining moment. He shares what it was like to finally feel at home in his body, and the impact that journey has had on how he sees himself today. The conversation also dives into Big Brother, including the unexpected way Zelah ended up on the show, the pressure of being a trans person on national television, and the responsibility that comes with representing a marginalised community. He reflects on viral moments from the show, including being misgendered, and how he processed those experiences both in the house and afterwards. They also discuss the role of politics in LGBTQ+ lives, why being “apolitical” isn’t always an option, and the importance of better, more everyday representation in media. This is a powerful, thoughtful and often surprising conversation about identity, resilience, and the reality of being visible in today’s world. Connect with Ben Cicchetti: Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/ YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchetti TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
April 7 · 1 hr 1 min
Lee Knight: A Friend of Dorothy, The Oscars Journey and Queer Storytelling
In this episode of Queer Talker, Ben Cicchetti sits down with writer and director Lee Knight, the creator behind A Friend of Dorothy, to explore storytelling, identity, and what it means to grow up queer in a very different world. Lee opens up about his childhood under Section 28, growing up in an environment shaped by fear, shame, and silence, and how that experience shaped both his identity and his creativity. He shares powerful memories of navigating school life, hiding who he was, and the lasting impact of growing up in a time where being gay was framed as something dangerous. The conversation dives into his journey from actor to writer and director, including the challenges of rejection, self-doubt, and finding the confidence to trust his own voice. Lee shares the story behind A Friend of Dorothy, from writing the script in lockdown to working with icons like Miriam Margolyes and Stephen Fry, and ultimately taking the film all the way to the Oscars. They also explore the importance of queer storytelling, representation, and the emotional weight of seeing younger generations grow up with visibility that simply didn’t exist before. This is an honest, emotional and inspiring conversation about resilience, creativity, and learning to trust yourself in a world that often tells you not to. Chapters 00:00 Introduction 01:42 Queer Panic: Rapid Fire Questions 03:54 Childhood Reflections: The Eclectic Journey 06:59 Resilience and the Quest for Authenticity 11:58 The Impact of Media on Queer Identity 17:12 Discovering and Accepting My Queer Self 22:10 The Bumpy Road to A Friend of Dorothy 27:07 Trusting Your Inner Voice 28:53 The Journey of Creation 32:13 Working with Icons 36:57 Capturing Authentic Moments 41:40 The Oscar Experience 53:50 Looking Ahead: Future Projects 56:11 Advice to the Younger Self Connect with Ben Cicchetti: Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/ YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchetti TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
March 24 · 42 min
Joseph Harwood: Gender, Makeup, Identity and the Reality of Social Media
In this episode of Queer Talker, Ben Cicchetti sits down with Joseph Harwood, one of the original beauty creators and a true pioneer in online content, to explore identity, creativity, and the evolution of social media. Joseph shares his extraordinary journey, from growing up in a strict church environment and navigating life as an androgynous young person, to becoming one of the first creators to build a career through makeup and digital platforms. He opens up about being scouted as a model, working internationally at a young age, and how discovering makeup became a powerful tool for expression, transformation, and storytelling. They dive deep into the early days of YouTube, when creativity came before algorithms, and unpack how social media has shifted from a space of individuality to one driven by conformity, performance, and debate. Joseph offers a rare behind-the-scenes perspective on how platforms, algorithms, and monetisation have shaped both visibility and the experience of LGBTQ+ creators online. The conversation also explores Joseph’s unique relationship with gender and identity, why he resists labels, and how his experiences have shaped a more fluid, human-first perspective on self-expression. He reflects on how differently people treat you based on appearance, and why authenticity matters more than ever in a world obsessed with categorisation. They also discuss mental health, resilience, and the importance of building a life beyond social media metrics, alongside practical advice for young LGBTQ+ people navigating identity, creativity, and career. This is a raw, insightful and at times provocative conversation about individuality, creativity, and what it really means to live authentically. Chapters 00:00 Queer Panic Game: Getting to Know Joe 03:55 Childhood and Upbringing: Shaping Identity 07:01 Understanding LGBTQ+ Awareness and Expression 09:59 Modeling Journey: From Scouting to Experiences 12:55 Makeup as Art: Creative Expression and Identity 16:03 Building a Career in Makeup: Community and Innovation 21:07 Navigating Gender Identity in the Beauty Industry 25:35 The Importance of Legal Protections for the LGBTQ+ Community 28:19 The Evolution of Social Media and Its Impact 35:01 Mental Health in the Age of Social Media 39:28 Advice for the Younger Generation and LGBTQ+ Youth Connect with Ben Cicchetti: Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/ YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchetti TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
March 10 · 48 min
Lee Peart: Comedy, Identity, and Finding Yourself Through Humour
In this episode of Queer Talker, Ben Cicchetti sits down with comedian, writer, and podcaster Lee Peart. Lee shares the journey that led him from navigating multiple identities at school to finding confidence and connection through stand-up comedy. Growing up balancing different versions of himself, Lee talks openly about humour becoming both a shield and a way to explore who he really was. From discovering comedy to embracing life on stage, Lee reflects on how performing helped him step into his identity as a gay man and build the confidence he once struggled to find. The conversation also explores the role of queer mentorship, the importance of seeing people further along the journey, and the impact figures like Matthew Shepard had on shaping queer history and visibility. This is a conversation about identity, humour, resilience, and the power of finding the space where you can finally be yourself. Chapters 00:00 Queer Panic Rapid Fire Questions 09:39 Exploring Childhood and Identity 16:14 First Awareness of LGBTQ+ Representation 21:22 The Role of Humor in Identity 27:59 Journey into Comedy 37:00 Navigating Different Spaces 40:11 Podcasting and Wine Demystification 45:06 Advice for Younger LGBTQ+ Individuals Connect with Ben Cicchetti: Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/ YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchetti TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
February 24 · 50 min
Linus Karp: Princess Diana, Gwyneth Paltrow & Creating Queer Joy On Stage
In this episode of Queer Talker, Ben Cicchetti sits down with writer, performer and Awkward Productions co-founder Linus Karp. From viral fringe shows to West End transfers, Linus has built a reputation for bold, chaotic and wildly intelligent queer theatre. But beneath the comedy is a deep understanding of identity, satire and what it really means to take up space as a queer creative. Linus shares the journey from a leaky shipping container at the Edinburgh Fringe to sold-out runs and five-star reviews. He talks about creating work like Diana: The Untold and Untrue Story and Gwyneth Goes Skiing, and why parody can sometimes say more about culture than seriousness ever could. We explore queer visibility in comedy, the difference between poking fun and punching down, and how working creatively with his husband has shaped both his art and his life. This is a conversation about ambition, irreverence, collaboration and building a body of work that refuses to behave. Chapters 00:00 Queer Panic 03:01 Childhood and Early Influences 05:43 Passion for Pop Culture 08:37 First Awareness of Queerness 11:36 Navigating Queerness and Authenticity 14:32 Theater Journey and Awkward Productions 17:50 Creative Process and Show Development 20:42 Marriage and Collaboration with Joseph 23:35 The Edinburgh Fringe Experience 26:31 Queer Culture and Political Context 29:40 Pressure of Success and Future Projects 32:38 Humor and Audience Connection 35:33 Performing in the U.S. and Cultural Differences 38:44 Advice to Younger Self and LGBTQ+ Youth 41:32 Conclusion and Final Thoughts Connect with Ben Cicchetti: Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/ YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchetti TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti Credits: Photo Credit: Dax Smith - https://www.instagram.com/the.photosmith/
February 10 · 55 min
Miss Tess Tickle: From Small-Town Survival to Drag, Visibility & Changing Minds
In this episode of Queer Talker, Ben Cicchetti sits down with drag artist, educator, and community force Miss Tess Tickle. Growing up queer in a small mining village in County Durham, Tess shares what it was like to survive bullying, Section 28, and a total lack of representation. From hiding parts of herself to finding joy, confidence, and purpose through drag, this is a powerful story about staying when it would have been easier to leave. Tess opens up about coming out to her parents, the moment that changed everything, and why visibility in small towns matters just as much as visibility on television. She also talks candidly about drag beyond Drag Race, working in tough straight venues, and using comedy, education, and compassion to change minds. We also explore Tess’s incredible community work through The Angel Trust, how drag became a tool for education and safeguarding, and why she believes we should not have to come out at all. This is a conversation about resilience, representation, chosen family, and being the person you needed when you were younger. Chapters 00:00 Queer Panic 04:30 Growing Up LGBTQ+: Challenges and Realizations 07:25 The Impact of Representation in Media 10:23 Coming Out: Personal Stories and Family Reactions 13:24 Finding Acceptance and Love 16:28 The Journey into Drag: A New Identity 19:16 Visibility and Community Engagement 26:05 The Journey into Drag 27:18 Life as a Drag Queen in the UK 31:59 Education Through Performance 37:08 Inspiration from Icons 43:03 Fighting for Acceptance in the Community 51:10 Empowering the Next Generation Learn more about the Angle Trust Website - https://www.angeltrust.co.uk Connect with Ben Cicchetti: Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/ YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchetti TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
January 27 · 1 hr
Jude Guaitamacchi: Non-Binary Visibility, Recovery, and Rebuilding a Life with Purpose
In this episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with Jude Guaitamacchi, non-binary activist, writer, and co-founder of Trans Solidarity Alliance. Jude opens up about growing up without the language to understand their identity, navigating trauma and addiction, and the long road to recovery and self-acceptance. They reflect on homelessness, survival, and what it means to rebuild a life when everything falls apart. The conversation also explores non-binary visibility, the emotional toll of activism, and why community care matters just as much as resistance. Jude shares powerful insights on leadership, allyship, and how queer people can protect themselves while still fighting for change. This is an honest and deeply human conversation about identity, resilience, and learning to stay when everything tells you to disappear. Chapters 00:00 Queer Panic 04:33 The Impact of Music and Media on Identity 07:25 Celebrating Unsung Heroes in the Queer Community 10:27 Childhood Challenges and the Search for Identity 13:12 Understanding Queerness and Representation 16:09 Authenticity and the Journey of Self-Discovery 19:10 The Role of Trauma in Shaping Activism 22:26 Prioritizing Self-Care in Activism 28:58 Embodying Love and Self-Care 31:03 The Birth of the Trans Solidarity Alliance 33:16 Navigating Political Activism 38:51 Visibility and Representation in Media 45:56 Brands and Allyship in the Current Climate 51:46 Coping with Scrutiny and Online Trolls 57:07 Advice to Younger Generations Learn more about the Trans+ Solidarity Alliance: Website - https://www.transsolidarityalliance.com/ Connect with Ben Cicchetti: Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/ YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchetti TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
January 13 · 35 min
Michael Gunning: Coming Out in Sport, Representation, and Finding Your Olympic Moment
Michael Gunning is a former elite swimmer, LGBTQ+ advocate, and one of the most important voices at the intersection of sport, race, and identity. In the first Queer Talker episode of 2026, Michael joins Ben Cicchetti for a powerful and deeply honest conversation about growing up feeling different, navigating elite sport as a queer mixed-race athlete, and the long journey toward living authentically. Michael reflects on overcompensating to fit in, the damaging stereotypes he faced in swimming, and how being told “Black people can’t swim” became fuel rather than a barrier. He opens up about suppression, resilience, and the mental toll of hiding parts of yourself in highly competitive environments. The conversation explores the importance of representation, the impact of seeing figures like Tom Daley come out in sport, and why visibility still matters in 2026. Michael also shares what it meant to come out publicly, the overwhelming mix of support and hate, and how that moment reshaped his life and sense of purpose. We also talk about retirement from elite sport, identity beyond the pool, body image, pressure, and what it means to redefine success after stepping away from a career that once defined you. This is a thoughtful, hopeful episode about resilience, self-acceptance, and learning that being different is not a weakness but a superpower. Chapters 00:00 Hopes and Dreams for 2026 04:18 Queer Panic 07:24 Childhood and Identity 10:19 Coming Out and Its Impact 13:20 Pride and Community 16:17 The Role of Swimming in Resilience 19:18 Representation in Sports 20:01 Embracing Authenticity in the Entertainment Industry 20:46 The Importance of Being Your True Self 21:50 Isolation and Connection in Elite Sports 23:05 Coming Out: A Transformative Experience 24:50 Navigating Public Perception and Personal Identity 26:25 The Transition from Elite Athlete to Everyday Life 28:06 The Reality of Retirement: Adjusting to Life After Sports 30:10 Maintaining Competitive Spirit Beyond the Pool 32:34 Advice to Younger Self and LGBTQ+ Youth Connect with Ben Cicchetti: Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/ YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchetti TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
Dec 30, 2025 · 50 min
Lewis Oakley: Bisexual Visibility, Identity, and Owning the In-Between
In this episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with Lewis Oakley, one of the UK’s most visible bisexual voices and a passionate advocate for representation, visibility, and belonging. Lewis opens up about growing up bisexual in a world that often struggles with nuance, where identities are pushed into boxes and the “in-between” is misunderstood or erased altogether. He reflects on the challenges of being openly bisexual, from stereotypes and disbelief to the pressure to constantly justify your identity. Together, Ben and Lewis explore why bisexual visibility matters, how language shapes acceptance, and what it means to show up authentically in spaces that are not always designed for complexity. Lewis also speaks candidly about confidence, self-acceptance, and the responsibility that comes with being visible for others who are still finding their voice. This is a conversation about bisexuality, visibility, and the power of being seen exactly as you are. Chapters 00:00 Queer Panic Rapid Fire Questions 04:22 Childhood Insights and Early Realizations 07:34 First Experiences in LGBTQ Spaces 10:34 Coming Out and Self-Discovery 13:47 The Complexity of Bisexual Identity 16:32 Navigating Bisexuality in Relationships 19:22 The Impact of Celebrity Influence on Bisexuality 22:40 Visibility and Representation of Bisexuals 25:27 The Reality of Love and Relationships 27:39 The Struggles of Bisexual Identity 29:36 Creating a Resource: The Book Journey 33:38 Navigating Loneliness in Bisexuality 36:41 Parenting and Advocacy: A Personal Perspective 42:17 Media Representation and Its Impact 47:20 Advice for the Younger Generation Connect with Lewis Oakley: Linktree - https://linktr.ee/lewyoaks Connect with Ben Cicchetti: Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/ YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchetti TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
Dec 16, 2025 · 41 min
Jessica L’Whor: Drag, Visibility, and Building Safe Spaces for Queer Youth
In this episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with drag performer, community builder, and cultural force Jessica L’Whor, also known as Miss Jessica, to explore drag as identity, resistance, and care. Jessica reflects on growing up in a deeply sheltered Catholic household, navigating queerness through religious guilt, and the long journey toward self acceptance. She speaks openly about coming out later in life, unlearning shame, and what it took to finally embrace who she is today. From her beginnings in the Denver drag scene to becoming a full time performer for over a decade, Jessica shares the realities of sustaining a creative career without television backing, the business discipline behind longevity, and why consistency matters more than viral moments. The conversation also dives into the creation of Miss Jessica, her all ages and family friendly drag persona. Jessica explains why visibility for queer youth is vital, how drag story times and school visits became part of her mission, and what it means to create safe, affirming spaces for children and families in a climate where drag is increasingly politicised. Ben and Jessica discuss chosen family, queer elders, touring across the United States, and the responsibility that comes with having a large platform. Jessica is candid about balancing joy and escapism with activism, and why being a soft, visible presence can be just as powerful as outrage. This is a conversation about drag as art, drag as care, and the importance of being the person you needed when you were younger. Chapters 00:00 Queer Panic Rapid Fire Questions 06:36 Childhood and Early Influences 11:42 Understanding Queerness and Family Dynamics 16:25 The State of Drag and LGBTQ+ Community 20:49 Jessica's Journey into Drag 21:31 Longevity in Drag Performance and Community Support 23:19 Empowering the Next Generation of Drag Artists 25:55 Creating Family-Friendly Drag Experiences 28:24 The Role of Visibility and Representation 30:55 Building an Authentic Online Presence 34:10 The Intersection of Art and Activism 37:21 Advice for the Younger Generation Connect with Jessica L’Whor: Website - https://www.jessicalwhor.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/jessicalwhor/ TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@jessicalwhor Connect with Ben Cicchetti: Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/ YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchetti TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
Dec 2, 2025 · 41 min
Mark Bittlestone: Comedy, Grief, Queer Identity and Finding His Voice
In this episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with comedian Mark Bittlestone whose sharp wit, queer storytelling and emotional honesty have made him one of the most exciting voices in British comedy. Mark opens up about growing up in 1990s Southwest London where homophobia was woven into the everyday language around him, even in an otherwise loving home. He reflects on spending a decade in the closet, the fear of being gay that shaped his early years and the moment he finally allowed himself to come out and breathe. He also shares how devastating loss shaped him. Mark lost his mum shortly before his A levels and his dad shortly before his university finals. He talks about how grief transformed his understanding of life and how comedy became both a coping mechanism and a calling. Ben and Mark dive into authenticity, dating, Grindr mishaps, the power of teasing straight men in comedy clubs, and the complicated pressure queer comedians feel to stop talking about their identity even when it is central to their story. Mark also reflects on falling into comedy, getting fired from teaching, building confidence through social media, touring his show I Need a Straight Guy, and figuring out what comes next as he enters the next phase of his career. Chapters 00:00 Queer Panic Rapid Fire Questions 04:16 Embarrassing Dating Stories 07:16 Proudest Career Moments 10:13 Childhood Influences on Identity 13:15 Awareness of Queerness and Family Dynamics 17:21 Coming Out and Authenticity 20:22 Navigating Loss and Grief 25:33 The Role of Comedy in Coping 27:47 Journey into Comedy 31:02 Queerness and Performance 32:29 Touring Experience and Audience Interaction 36:22 Using Platform for Advocacy 38:14 Future Aspirations and Reflection 39:11 Advice to Younger Self and LGBTQ+ Youth Connect with Ben Cicchetti: Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/ YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchetti TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
Nov 18, 2025 · 50 min
Lord Chris Smith: Britain’s First Openly Gay MP, Section 28 & Fighting for Equality
In this episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with Lord Chris Smith — Britain’s first openly gay male MP, the world’s first openly gay cabinet minister, and a pioneering voice for LGBTQ+ equality in politics. Chris reflects on the moment in 1984 when he stood on stage in Rugby and came out publicly, becoming the first openly gay MP in British history, and the courage it took to do so in a hostile climate. He shares his perspective on Section 28, the chilling effect it had on young LGBTQ+ people, and the long fight to overturn it. We also discuss his achievements as Secretary of State, from making national museums free for all to helping pass landmark LGBTQ+ legislation under Tony Blair’s government, as well as his later decision to speak publicly about living with HIV and the extraordinary phone call he received from Nelson Mandela afterwards. From his student days in Edinburgh and Cambridge, to becoming Chancellor of the University of Cambridge, Chris has consistently broken barriers and left a lasting legacy. His story is one of courage, resilience, and hope — a reminder of how far we’ve come and the work still to be done for true equality. This episode is a must-listen for anyone interested in LGBTQ+ history, politics, and the power of visibility. Chapters 00:00 Queer Panic Rapid Fire Questions 03:21 Proud Moments in Politics 05:52 Understanding Childhood and Identity 09:38 Journey into Politics 11:00 Coming Out as the First Openly Gay MP 18:09 Reactions in Parliament 20:07 The Impact of Section 28 26:02 Becoming the First Openly Gay Cabinet Member 27:41 Legislative Changes for LGBTQ Rights 32:18 The Importance of Diversity in Leadership 34:29 Going Public with HIV Status 41:48 Role as Chancellor of Cambridge University 45:32 Reflections on the Current Trans Community Climate 47:43 Advice to Younger Self and LGBTQ Youth Connect with Ben Cicchetti: Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/ YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchetti TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
Nov 4, 2025 · 1 hr 6 min
Jaxon Feeley: From Prison Officer to Trans Advocate and Doing it Scared
In this episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with Jaxon Feeley, former prison officer, public speaker, and trans advocate, for a powerful and deeply human conversation about courage, visibility, and doing it scared. Jaxon opens up about his life before and after transition, from working in the prison service to walking back through the gates as “Mr Feeley.” He shares how he found the strength to come out publicly, the moment he told his family they could have “a dead daughter or a living son,” and why he believes fear and bravery can exist in the same breath. From battling stigma to embracing authenticity, Jaxon’s story is one of resilience, vulnerability, and relentless hope. His mantra, “do it scared,” is a reminder that courage does not mean being fearless; it means showing up anyway. Chapters 00:00 Queer Panic Rapid Fire 03:35 Childhood and Early Identity 08:42 Transitioning and Authenticity 13:21 Family Dynamics and Support 18:32 Working in a Prison Environment 23:22 Reality TV Experiences 28:38 Living Authentically in the World 34:10 The Intensity of Reality TV 34:56 Balancing Multiple Roles 37:08 Finding Daily Happiness 39:11 Navigating Loneliness in the Spotlight 41:39 The Importance of Social Media Breaks 43:27 The Thrill of Hunted: A Unique Experience 56:06 The Impact of Representation in Media 59:17 Introducing 'Fear Proof': A New Book 01:03:38 Advice for the Younger Self Connect with Ben Cicchetti: Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/ YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchetti TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti Connect from Jaxon Feeley: Website - https://jaxonfeeley.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/jaxryderfeeley