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Lead to Soar

Michelle Redfern & Mel Butcher

Lead to Soar is the podcast where ambitious women get strategic, evidence-based guidance to reach their full potential and reshape the systems that hold them back. Each episode delivers practical leadership insights grounded in Business, Emotional and Social Intelligence so women can lead with impact and advance their careers on their own terms.

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26 episodes
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Avg 33 min
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#239
Sunday · 33 min
Who Gets to Speak Their Mind at Work, and Who Gets Called Abrasive?
Years ago, Michelle Redfern told her manager at one of Australia's big banks that the team had a politeness problem. He told her to keep speaking up. A couple of years later she had a reputation, and one of the words attached to it was "abrasive." Mel Butcher and Michelle look at who gets to speak their mind at work and who pays for it. They cover the question every leader needs to ask (am I consulting people for better ideas, or collecting yeses?), how psychological safety works in a team, and why women receive more vague, personality-based feedback than men. Textio's 2022 research found that women are 11 times more likely to be described as "abrasive" in performance feedback. You'll also get three tools you can use this week: the "mad, sad, glad" team check-in, the "play the ball, not the player" approach from Susan Colantuono's The Language of Power, and a "more of, less of, and why" structure for feedback that is specific and actionable. Related: Episode 161, Career Compass: Mastering Actionable Feedback and Overcoming Gender Bias. Michelle's self-paced course on giving, receiving and asking for feedback is coming soon inside the Lead to Soar Network What evidence do you see in your own workplace? Tell us in the comments. Get full access to Lead to Soar Podcast at leadtosoarpodcast.substack.com/subscribe
#238
September 27 · 34 min
No One Should Care About Your Career As Much As You Do
Career pathing is rarely as linear as it looks, and in Michelle's organisational diagnostic work, the single biggest gap women report is that their manager isn't giving them useful career advice. In this episode, Mel and Michelle pull apart why the traditional career ladder is a scarcity game, why leaving your progression in your manager's hands is a risk you can't afford, and what to do instead. They walk through a four-move framework for evaluating what's next: stay, reshape, shift, go, and cover salary benchmarking, strategic networking inside and outside your organisation, why women are so often asked to prove readiness that men get handed on potential alone, and what leaders owe the people they're meant to be developing. Get full access to Lead to Soar Podcast at leadtosoarpodcast.substack.com/subscribe
September 20 · 34 min
You Read the Book. Nothing Happened
A listener wrote in with a question anyone with a shelf of half-read leadership books will recognise. She reads good books. She underlines the useful parts. Nothing changes. Mel and Michelle did not script an answer. They worked it out in real time, and the diagnosis arrives fast. If your life is already full, work stacked on caregiving stacked on more work, there is nowhere to put the advice. Truth Bomb: The quality of the book is irrelevant. When women still carry 75%+ of the world’s unpaid labour, getting advice to “just make time to reflect” will probably not hit the mark as great life advice! The most useful example in the episode is also the smallest. Michelle read Atomic Habits years ago and took one thing from it: reduce the friction. Her walking shoes lived on the top floor of a three-storey house and she rarely walked, so she moved them to the door. She now keeps her bike, helmet and gloves ready to go wherever she is living. One idea, acted on. Mel read the same book twice, came away with a better grasp of habit theory, and changed no behaviour. The other point made by Mel, after reading “You Can Do Hard Things” by Cate Hall, is that not everything has to be hard won. So thinking that a pile of TBR books is a failure is not, there might be an easier way to consume the content (audiobooks for example!) Truth Bomb: stop trying to solve everything with a book. Take the one thing. Write it down. Do something with it this week. Are you thriving or just surviving? Take Michelle’s life audit quiz. Get full access to Lead to Soar Podcast at leadtosoarpodcast.substack.com/subscribe
#236
September 14 · 54 min
Women Are Cleaning Up AI's Mess For Free, with Kara Bombell
Somebody has to clean up after a technology moving faster than the people responsible for it can manage, and that job keeps landing on women, unpaid and uncredentialed. Kara Bombell, co-founder of Ethic AI and a former chief operations officer, joins Michelle and Mel to unpack the difference between a company genuinely disrupted by AI and a poorly performing company using AI as cover, why caution about AI got read as women falling behind rather than paying attention, and the shift from "human in the loop" to "human at the helm" as a better way to think about your own authority over these tools. They also cover two things you can build with AI in your own role this month, no technical background required. About Kara: Kara Bombell spent years inside large corporates and consulting for blue-chip companies before co-founding Ethic AI, where she works with resource-constrained organisations, including not-for-profits, government and child safety services, to embed AI responsibly. Get full access to Lead to Soar Podcast at leadtosoarpodcast.substack.com/subscribe
#235
September 6 · 34 min
What Would Happen if a World-Class CEO Took Over Your Life?
This episode takes the "world-class CEO" conversation personal: what does it look like if a CEO with that calibre of judgement took over your life the way they'd take over a business? Mel puts herself forward as the test case, and Michelle runs the exercise live, on air. Mel's life gets mapped the way she'd map it herself: her career and finances under BQ, her relationships under SQ, and her emotional wellbeing and health under EQ. Michelle opens the way she'd open any real engagement, not with advice, but with the same first question: where are you now, and where do you want to get to? Inside this episode: the design thinking chronology exercise Michelle built during her MBA and still uses today; the positional purpose question, what are you actually paid to do, and why it applies to every role, not just the ones with a sales target; the four things every CEO tracks, cash, growth, return and customer; a concrete way to set a financial goal and close the gap to it; and the disease to please, and why being liked and being respected are not the same test. A version of the positional purpose exercise is running in the Lead to Soar Network this month, tracking a week's worth of hours against the same question Michelle asks Mel on the show. Get full access to Lead to Soar Podcast at leadtosoarpodcast.substack.com/subscribe
#234
August 30 · 40 min
What Makes a CEO World Class?
Are we actually looking at CEOs the right way? No, we're not. We're doing it inside a patriarchal context, inside a capitalist system, and calling the result "world-class." Mel and Michelle went looking for a definition that holds up outside that frame and couldn't find one, so this episode builds one from scratch: BQ as the floor, EQ and SQ as the accelerant, and the safe-pair-of-hands test every leader claiming the title should have to pass. Get full access to Lead to Soar Podcast at leadtosoarpodcast.substack.com/subscribe
#233
August 24 · 23 min
The Good Girl Tax
Being praised as a good team player feels rewarding. Michelle Redfern and Mel Butcher call out what it actually costs this episode: a tax on women who’ve been socialised to say yes, one that rarely shows up in your pay or your title. Two women in engineering consulting were asked to take on more work without extra pay. One agreed to become the “office manager,” took on the workload, and ended up stuck. The other said no, in writing, calmly and clearly, and protected her progression instead. From there, Michelle walks through her “stop, breathe, reflect” framework: three questions to run before you agree to anything new. In this episode: * Why women pay the good girl tax, and what it costs in the long term * Two stories: one costly yes, one considered no * Three questions to test whether new work builds your career or just your workload A script for buying time before you answer Free resource: The Career Progression Evidence Test. Take it, then let Mel and Michelle know what came up for you. The Lead to Soar Network Lead to Soar equips women with the Business (BQ), Emotional (EQ), and Social (SQ) intelligence required to be recognised, trusted, and promoted. We do not fix women. We build capability and redesign systems so talent rises. How We Drive Impact A global leadership accelerator for ambitious women. Members gain: • Weekly group coaching that solves real business challenges • Practical tools to strengthen BQ, EQ, and SQ • Strategic networking with women who are serious about outcomes • Direct access to globally recognised experts in women’s advancement Result: women negotiate pay raises, secure executive roles, strengthen commercial credibility, and become visible for strategic impact. For organisations, the Network functions as a scalable, cost-effective leadership pipeline solution. Paid subscribers get a 3-month guest pass - message Michelle to access your pass. Get full access to Lead to Soar Podcast at leadtosoarpodcast.substack.com/subscribe
#232
August 16 · 23 min
Your AI Has a Default Setting, and It Isn't You
Michelle ran an experiment. She asked Gemini and Claude the same question, at the same time: how do I ask my manager for a pay rise? Gemini's answer was generic and gendered: just be bold, ask for what you want. No mention of the barriers women navigate to be heard as credible in the first place. Claude's answer looked completely different, but not because one platform beats the other. Michelle's Claude carries months of her own directives about what a business-savvy, woman-first answer actually looks like. That's the real subject of this episode: what your AI defaults to when you don't intervene, and what to do about it. Michelle and Mel cover how to prompt for advice that accounts for structural barriers rather than erasing them, a practical exercise for turning technical work into an executive-ready summary, and a warning for leaders: AI is already shaping pay, performance and promotion decisions in your organisation, mostly without anyone checking how. Leaders: read the paper, then take the audit, both linked in the show notes. Lead to Soar Network members get Michelle's full prompt library, including the exercises mentioned above. Get full access to Lead to Soar Podcast at leadtosoarpodcast.substack.com/subscribe
#231
August 9 · 49 min
Your Employer Is the Second Most Significant Relationship You Have
Mel sits down with English and rhetoric professor Dr Jenny Young, whose Burn the Haystack method teaches women to read the language men use on dating apps for what it actually reveals. This conversation goes well past dating: toxic rhetorical patterns, the "test and apologise" tactic, and why a boss who lowered everyone else's chair three inches is doing the same thing as a man who glares down at the camera in his profile photo. Contains direct discussion of dating apps, sexual testing tactics and abusive relationship dynamics. Get full access to Lead to Soar Podcast at leadtosoarpodcast.substack.com/subscribe
#230
August 2 · 32 min
The Leadership Double Bind: Why Executive Women Still Can’t Win
Executive women are still judged against a narrow idea of what credible leadership looks and sounds like. Warmth can be mistaken for a lack of commercial acumen, authority can be interpreted as aggression, and likeability can become part of an assessment that should be about capability and results. In this episode of Lead to Soar, Michelle Redfern and Mel Butcher explore what happens when women refuse to assimilate into workplace cultures built around hard-coded gender stereotypes. They discuss why warm, energetic and relational women are so often underestimated, how BQ, EQ and SQ shape leadership credibility, and how women can read the room and make their value unmistakable while staying connected to who they are. Truth Bomb: organisations keep mistaking warmth for a lack of business acumen, then lose commercially capable women to competitors with better judgment. Michelle and Mel also share practical language women can use when feedback starts sounding more like a style preference than a serious assessment of leadership. Get full access to Lead to Soar Podcast at leadtosoarpodcast.substack.com/subscribe
#229
July 26 · 23 min
Clean Up on Aisle Seven: How Executive Women Get Assigned Other Peoples Work
The conversation about non-promotable tasks does not end when women reach the executive table. It just gets more expensive. In Episode 229, Mel and Michelle take the office housework conversation somewhere it rarely goes: into the C-suite and executive tier, where the stakes are higher, the patterns are harder to see, and the costs show up in titles, salary bands, and what you actually spend your days doing. Michelle shares her own experience of being the only woman on an executive team of eight, holding a lesser title than all seven of her male peers, and becoming the unofficial coaching hub for the entire organisation because her male colleagues sent her their problems and kept the interesting (aka promotable) work for themselves. The episode covers two layers of this problem: women being structurally channelled into enabling roles with no P&L responsibility, and the informal offloading of people management and emotional labour onto the woman who said yes once and never quite stopped. It also delivers a practical BQ gap analysis to help you name what is happening and have a fact-based conversation with someone who can do something about it. And there is a direct word for decision-makers. If you are tolerating senior leaders who abdicate their people responsibilities onto the nearest woman, this one is also for you. Get full access to Lead to Soar Podcast at leadtosoarpodcast.substack.com/subscribe
#228
July 19 · 30 min
Women of Consequence: What Women Leaders Who Are Respected Do Differently
There's a question Michelle puts to every group of women she works with on leadership reputation: what would your boss say about you? The answers are almost always the same. Helpful. Dependable. Reliable. Great team player. And then silence where strategic, consequential, and trusted with outcomes should be. This episode is about that silence and what breaks it. Mel and Michelle dig into three things women leaders need to get right to change how they're seen at work: knowing your no, delegation as a financial and strategic skill rather than a management preference, and understanding your positional purpose what do they actually pay you to do around here? The gap between being liked and being a woman of consequence is not a confidence problem. It's a clarity problem. This episode addresses it directly. Self-assessment link below.https://www.research.net/r/WhatsYourRep Get full access to Lead to Soar Podcast at leadtosoarpodcast.substack.com/subscribe
July 12 · 27 min
Should I Stay or Should I Go? Neither. Here's a Third Option.
The answer most women get when they've outgrown their role is one of two things: be patient, or go find something better. Mel and Michelle don't buy either as a default response. In this episode they work through the third option. Using the real story of a CFO-ready executive who's been blocked by an incumbent boss for two years, they break down three practical moves: closing your readiness gap through targeted professional development, lifting your team so you can operate above your current level, and extending your influence well beyond your immediate lane. This is a career strategy conversation for women who are delivering, have capacity, and are ready for the role above. The actual moves to make while the door above you stays closed. Get full access to Lead to Soar Podcast at leadtosoarpodcast.substack.com/subscribe
#226
July 5 · 38 min
Radical Transparency: Why It Can Be a Winner for Women at Work
Radical transparency is not just a leadership style. For women at work, it is a structural advantage. When leaders commit to genuine transparency, the conditions that have historically worked against women start to shift. Pay gaps narrow when salaries are visible. Promotion processes become fair when the criteria are clear. Information networks open up when knowledge is shared, not hoarded. In Episode 226, Mel and Michelle explore what radical transparency actually looks like in practice, what it produces for teams and organisations, and why women are among its greatest beneficiaries regardless of the gender of the leader practising it. This one came directly from the Lead to Soar community. A member shared her CEO's approach to radical transparency in Hour of Power, and the conversation was too good to stay in the room. Get full access to Lead to Soar Podcast at leadtosoarpodcast.substack.com/subscribe
June 28 · 46 min
Tired of Being Tired? What Mel and Michelle Actually Do
This one is a little different. No frameworks. No research papers. Just Mel and Michelle getting real about what actually sustains them when life is heavy, and the load is relentless. They cover sleep as serious infrastructure, not a lifestyle indulgence. The quiet shift away from alcohol and what that has actually changed. Movement that brings genuine joy rather than punishing obligation. And the particular exhaustion of being a woman who was raised to cope and never to ask. Honest, warm, and genuinely useful. Sometimes the most feminist thing you can do is take care of yourself so you can keep showing up. Books referenced: The Future of Sleep by Catherine Ball, Quit Like a Woman by Holly Whitaker, The Sleep Revolution by Arianna Huffington. Get full access to Lead to Soar Podcast at leadtosoarpodcast.substack.com/subscribe
#224
June 21 · 29 min
7 Job Hunting Tips for Ambitious Women to Use
Job hunting hell is real. Submitting applications into the void, waiting, hearing nothing, wondering what is going wrong. Mel and Michelle are here with the tough love answer. A significant chunk of advertised roles are not real openings. AI-assisted applications are not the edge anyone thinks they are. And online applications are the career equivalent of throwing your CV into the wind. This episode covers the 7 job hunting tips that actually work, including how to crack the hidden job market, make courageous asks, leverage your network with intent, and pick up the damn phone. Get full access to Lead to Soar Podcast at leadtosoarpodcast.substack.com/subscribe
#223
June 14 · 34 min
Leaders Are Measuring the Wrong Things and Women Are Paying for It.
Leaders are measuring the wrong things. The work that holds organisations together, the mentoring, the client salvage, the culture-building, the covering, the onboarding, does not fit neatly into a KPI. So it goes uncounted. And the people doing it are, consistently and disproportionately, women. In episode 223, Mel and Michelle make the leadership case for fixing this. Leaders who expect this work from their teams must measure it, compensate it, and distribute it equitably. The Gallup State of the Global Workplace Report is unambiguous: women are more engaged than men in every region in the world. They are also reporting significantly higher rates of daily stress and sadness. That data tells you exactly what this imbalance is costing. This episode covers what leaders must audit, what metrics apply to work that feels nebulous, and what role design looks like when a leader gets it right. If you are a woman navigating this and want people in your corner, the Lead to Soar Network is where you bring it. Gallup Report Join Lead to Soar Get full access to Lead to Soar Podcast at leadtosoarpodcast.substack.com/subscribe
#222
June 7 · 33 min
Feminist Awakening: How to Turn Anger at Work Into a Career Strategy
A young lawyer has just been pulled aside about her billable hours. Her male partner at the same firm, same credentials, has not had that conversation. He also hasn't been asked to mentor the grads, organise anything, or carry any of the work that holds a team together, but shows up nowhere in the performance data. She has been asked to do all of it. The gap in their billable hours did not happen by accident. In this episode, Mel and Michelle walk through the four phases of feminist consciousness, from oblivion to awareness to outrage to advocacy. They break down the office housework problem, look at a feedback conversation that didn't register the way it was intended, and lay out what leaders must actually do when non-promotable work keeps piling up on women's plates. Recommended reading: The No Club: Putting a Stop to Women's Dead End Work by Linda Babcock, Brenda Peyser, Lise Vesterlund and Laurie Weingart. Get full access to Lead to Soar Podcast at leadtosoarpodcast.substack.com/subscribe
#221
May 31 · 27 min
Why Your Boss's Brand Is Now Your Problem Too
Your boss's brand doesn't stay contained to your boss. If they're seen as an order-taker, someone who receives agendas rather than shaping them, that lens gets applied to your team. Your work gets filtered through their credibility before it reaches anyone with real decision-making power. In Episode 221, Mel and Michelle break down what to do when the people around you don't have the influence you need them to have. They cover how to read the warning signs early, how to coach upward strategically, and why business acumen is the gate-opener for influence that actually sticks. Get full access to Lead to Soar Podcast at leadtosoarpodcast.substack.com/subscribe
#220
May 24 · 26 min
How to Lead High Performers in a Dysfunctional Organization
What happens when your team is genuinely excellent but the organisation around it is a mess? In this episode, Michelle and Mel unpack a real coaching scenario: a high-performing project management team that had convinced itself the problem was its own communication skills. It wasn't. The problem was accomplishment amnesia, structural invisibility, and a leadership layer that hadn't yet connected delivery to business outcomes. Michelle shares the frameworks she used in that room, why middle managers need to be both a bulldozer and a barrier, how to articulate your team's value in the language of outcomes, and what it takes to know when the ledger has tipped too far and it's time to pass the baton. This one is for every leader who's ever been the best-kept secret in their own organisation. Get full access to Lead to Soar Podcast at leadtosoarpodcast.substack.com/subscribe

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