Health & FitnessMental HealthEducationSelf-ImprovementFitness

Grow the Good

Sonya Looney

Grow the Good, formerly The Sonya Looney Show, is your guide to continual personal growth, meaningful connections, and positive impact in the world. Challenge the idea that you are broken or need fixing. Instead, discover how to cultivate the good that already exists within you and amplify the strengths and potential you may not yet realize you have. Grounded in the science of positive psychology and guided by the pillars of purpose, vitality, resilience, hope, and connection, each episode is packed with tools, stories, and evidence-backed insights to help you create a more authentic and flourishing life.

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20 episodes
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Avg 41 min
English

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S1 · E473
Thursday · 26 min
How Connecting With Nature Changes Your Well-Being
A lot of us spend time outside. We run, ride, hike, train, explore, and use nature as a place to play or pursue our goals. But does spending time in nature actually mean we’re connected to it? This episode was inspired by something I heard during a recent breathwork session: many of us use nature without being in relationship with nature. That idea made me think about my own life as an athlete, and all the years I spent outside focused on intervals, performance, Strava times, and self-improvement without always noticing the world I was moving through. In this solo episode, I explore the research around nature connectedness and the difference between simply being outside and actually feeling like you’re part of the natural world. I talk about: - Awe - The “small self” - Meaning - Curiosity - Sensory awareness - Simple ways we can become more present outside without giving up our workouts or performance goals I'm not encouraging us to slow down all the time. I'm talking about occasionally looking up, paying attention, and remembering that nature can be more than the backdrop for what we’re trying to accomplish. What might change if we stopped only using nature, and started building a relationship with it? LINKS - Nature Connectedness & Well-Being with Molly Peterson & Dr. Holli-Anne Passmore - Mindfulness in Action: Grounding in Nature - Movement, Nature, and Connection for Optimal Well-Being with John Ratey -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.
September 10 · 57 min
The Courage to Quit with Lindsay Crouse
What if quitting was courageous? In this episode, I sit down with Lindsay Crouse, a former New York Times journalist and producer who spent 15 years at the Times, where she worked in Opinion and helped commission hundreds of short documentaries for Op-Docs. As an endurance athlete herself, Lindsay also became known for telling powerful stories about female athletes, pregnancy, sponsorship, and the hidden challenges women face in sport. Now, Lindsay has written a book about quitting. We talk about why our culture celebrates pushing through at all costs, how perseverance can become a trap, and why quitting can sometimes be the wiser, braver, more values-aligned choice. Lindsay shares what led her to leave the Times, how motherhood changed her relationship with work and running, and why so many women in midlife start asking whether the lives they built in their twenties still fit who they are now. I also share a story I haven’t really talked about before: the moment I decided to quit chasing sponsorships after pregnancy, even though I was still winning races. I had overcome so much, but the cycle of overdelivering, being unseen, and trying to prove my worth had become damaging to my mental health. Someone called it “positive quitting,” and that phrase has stayed with me. This episode is for anyone who has been taught to never give up, but is starting to wonder whether continuing is actually helping or hurting. It’s about identity, motherhood, sport, learned helplessness, hope, sunk costs, fear, and the freedom that can come when we stop forcing ourselves to stay on a path we’ve outgrown. Top 5 Takeaways Quitting is not always failure: Sometimes quitting is the choice that allows us to preserve our energy, integrity, health, and future possibility. Perseverance can become passive: Continuing is also a choice, even when it feels like the default. Identity can keep us stuck: When we are known for something, it can feel terrifying to let it go, even if it no longer fits. Women often feel pressure to “hold up the sky”: In sport, work, motherhood, and life, quitting can feel like confirming someone else’s bias instead of honoring our own truth. Hope can be complicated: Optimism and hard work can keep us locked into paths where we no longer have real control or momentum. LINKS Learn more about Lindsay Crouse Follow Lindsay on Instagram Read The Case for Quitting: The Surprising Benefits of Opting Out Listen to What It Really Means to Matter Listen to Hope Is the Strategy: Burnout, Mattering, and Meaningful Work with Jen Fisher -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.
S1 · E471
August 20 · 29 min
Squamish 50K: Racing to the Level of Who I Am Today
A couple of days ago, I finished my first ultra trail running race: the Squamish 50K. This episode is a reflection on what it took to get there, what actually happened out on the course, and what I’m still processing afterward. This wasn’t a fairy-tale race story. I came into it after broken ribs, sickness, a short training window, and a lot of uncertainty about whether my body would hold up. I kept coming back to one idea: race to the level of my durability, not the level of my fitness. That was humbling. I had to go against old instincts from 20 years of mountain bike racing, let people pass me, manage pain, and accept that who I am today is not always the same as who I’ve been in the past. But I finished, my kids ran across the line with me, and I learned a lot about patience, limits, identity, and what it means to show up honestly. This episode is for anyone who has had to meet themselves where they are, not where they wish they were. Key Takeaways - Race to the level of your durability, not just your fitness - Who you are today matters more than who you’ve been - Finishing can be meaningful without being glamorous - Pain and suffering don’t need to be glorified - Identity is allowed to shift -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.
S1 · E470
August 13 · 50 min
Using Self-Talk for Mindset, Perception, and Expectations with Ethan Kross | REPLAY
This week, I’m bringing back a conversation from the archives with Ethan Kross, one of the world’s leading experts on the conscious mind and the author of Chatter and Shift. I wanted to replay this episode because it connects so strongly with what I’ve been exploring lately on Grow the Good: impatience, rushing, emotional regulation, mindfulness, and the way our inner voice can either help us move through challenges or keep us stuck in loops of overthinking. Ethan’s work looks at the conversations we have with ourselves and how those conversations shape our health, performance, decisions, relationships, and well-being. In this episode, we talk about negative self-talk, chatter, emotion, mindfulness, problem-solving, and why creating psychological distance can help us work with our thoughts more effectively. One of the tools Ethan shares is called distant self-talk: coaching yourself through a challenge the way you would coach a friend, even using your own name or the word “you” to create a little more space. That shift can help us move from being consumed by our thoughts to relating to them with more perspective. This conversation is a great reminder that our thoughts are not always facts, and our inner voice does not have to be in charge. We can learn to work with it, redirect it, and use it as a tool for more clarity, resilience, and self-compassion. KEY TAKEAWAYS: The difference between self-control and willpower What emotions are and how they shape our behavior Problem-solving versus overthinking Negative self-talk versus chatter When mindfulness helps, and when reframing may be more useful How distant self-talk can shift perspective Why sleep and chatter are so closely connected LINKS: - Original conversation with Ethan Kross - Learn more about Ethan's work - Read Ethan's books "Chatter" and newly released, "Shift" - Listen to Self-Talk for Performance: Mental Skills for Athletes -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.
S1 · E469
August 6 · 1 hr 10 min
Growing Up as Adults with Travis Macy
What does it actually mean to keep growing as an adult? In this episode, I sit down with my dear friend Travis Macy for a conversation that is less of an interview and more of a real, honest exploration of adulthood, grief, parenting, identity, intimacy, and mattering. Travis and I have had many podcast conversations over the years. I’ve been on his podcast, he’s been on mine, and we became good friends through this work. In a lot of ways, we’ve lived these almost parallel lives as professional athletes, parents, podcasters, keynote speakers, authors, and people trying to figure out who we are beyond performance. In this conversation, Travis shares about his father’s eight-year journey with Alzheimer’s and his recent passing, and how that experience became a major developmental milestone in his own life. We talk about grief, appreciation, gratitude, and the strange way hard things can deepen us when we are willing to stay present with them. We also explore adult development: how our beliefs, identities, relationships, and sense of self change over time. We talk about moving from approval-seeking to mattering, from performance-based identity to something more flexible, and from people-pleasing to more honest communication and deeper intimacy. This episode is for anyone navigating transition, grief, parenting, identity shifts, or the question: who am I becoming now? Top 5 Takeaways Adult growth is not just personal development: It changes how we understand ourselves, our relationships, and the world around us. Grief can become a developmental milestone: Travis shares how his father’s Alzheimer’s journey and passing reshaped his sense of adulthood, gratitude, and appreciation. Identity has to become more flexible: Many of us are learning who we are beyond performance, achievement, sponsorships, or old versions of success. Mattering is different from approval: Feeling valued and knowing we add value can move us beyond people-pleasing and the need to prove ourselves. Relationships help us grow: Parenting, partnership, friendship, community, and emotional honesty can all become places where adult development happens. LINKS Learn about Travis’s work Follow Travis on Instagram A Mile at a Time with Endurance Athletes Travis and Mark “Mace” Macy The Ultra Mindset with Endurance Athlete and Coach Travis Macy Performance, Imperfect Preparation, and Flexibility with Travis Macy (Live Podcast) -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.
S1 · E468
July 17 · 10 min
Mindfulness in Action: Slow Down 2%
In this Mindfulness in Action episode, we’re practicing patience in real time. If you listened to last week’s solo episode, I talked about impatience, rushing, and how so many of us move through life like our self-worth depends on our productivity. This practice is about noticing that urgency in the body and gently turning the dial down. You don’t have to cancel everything or suddenly become a completely calm person. This is about slowing down just 2%, enough for your nervous system to notice that you are no longer rushing. You are just moving. I guide you through a simple walking meditation to notice your default pace, where urgency shows up in your body, and what changes when you soften, breathe, and move a little more slowly. This is a practice for anyone who feels like they’re living in fast-forward mode and wants to come back to the present moment. -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.
S1 · E467
July 9 · 29 min
The Urgency Trap
In this solo episode, I’m talking about patience, and really, about rushing. Rather than focus on time management conversation, I'm taking a look at what happens in our bodies and nervous systems when we move through life with constant urgency, and how impatience can show us where we feel out of control, overstimulated, or overly attached to productivity. I share what I’ve been noticing in my own life, from parenting and waiting in lines to endurance racing, phones, AI, and the scratchy feeling of wanting things to happen faster than they can. The good news is that patience is trainable. It’s a skill that helps us stay present with discomfort, delay, uncertainty, and the slow parts of growth. Next week, we’ll practice building patience in real time with a Mindfulness in Action episode. -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.
July 2 · 55 min
Hope Is the Strategy: Burnout, Mattering, and Meaningful Work with Jen Fisher
In this episode, I sit down with workplace well-being expert and author Jen Fisher to talk about her book, Hope Is the Strategy, and why hope matters so much in a world where so many people are burned out, languishing, and struggling to feel like they matter. Jen shares her own story of severe burnout and how achievement-based identity, constant performance pressure, and external definitions of success can slowly disconnect us from our well-being. This conversation felt especially meaningful to me because so many of us, athletes, high achievers, leaders, parents, professionals, know what it feels like to keep pushing, even when something inside us is saying, “This is not sustainable.” We talk about the difference between hope and optimism, and Jen breaks down hope as an evidence-based framework: having a goal, seeing pathways forward, and believing we have agency. We also explore how hope is connected to mattering, why feeling valued is essential for well-being, and what individuals, teams, and organizations can do to create environments where people can actually thrive. We also get into rest, recovery, human connection, and the role of AI in the future of work. If AI is going to change how we work, how can we use it to make work more human instead of less? This conversation is for anyone who has ever tied their worth to achievement, felt stuck in a system that was eroding their well-being, or wondered how to keep moving forward with more hope, courage, and connection. Top 5 Takeaways Hope is active, not passive: Hope includes a clear goal, pathways to move forward, and the agency to take action. Achievement-based identity can fuel burnout: When our worth depends on performance, success can become unsustainable. Languishing gives language to the in-between: You may not be in crisis, but you may not be flourishing either. Mattering and hope are deeply connected: Feeling valued and knowing your contributions matter can help create the conditions for hope. Work needs to become more human, not less: Rest, recovery, connection, and thoughtful AI use all matter in the future of well-being. LINKS Learn more about Jen Fisher Read Jen Fisher’s new book Hope is the Strategy Finding Meaning and Mattering at Work with Andrew Soren Finding Meaningful Work with Wes Adams and Tamara Myles -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.
S1 · E465
June 18 · 22 min
Mindfulness in Action: Letting Yourself Feel Valued
In this Mindfulness in Action episode, I’m exploring what it means to not only add value, but to let ourselves feel valued. So many of us are working hard to matter. We’re trying to contribute, perform, improve, achieve, help, and show up for other people. But even when we are adding value, we may not actually let the feeling of mattering land. We move so quickly that we miss the evidence that we are seen, appreciated, and needed. This episode is deeply personal for me. I share a reflection on the loss of Isaac Prilleltensky, whose work on mattering has profoundly shaped my life, my research, and the book I’m writing. Isaac embodied mattering in the way he made people feel seen and valued, and his encouragement helped me keep going when I needed it most. From there, I guide you through a short mindfulness and reflection practice to help you remember a time when someone made you feel valued. We’ll practice noticing not just the thought of that moment, but how it felt in the body. The warmth, lightness, relief, energy, or connection that can come when we allow ourselves to receive care, recognition, or support. Because mattering is not only about what we give, it's also about what we are willing to receive. Top 5 Takeaways Mattering has two sides: It includes both adding value and feeling valued. Many of us struggle to let feeling valued land: Compliments, help, encouragement, and recognition can be uncomfortable to receive. Feeling valued is embodied: It can show up as warmth, lightness, relief, energy, or a sense of connection. Accepting help allows others to add value too: Receiving is not a burden; it can deepen connection and mattering on both sides. What we focus on, we begin to notice: Practicing awareness of where we feel valued can help us see more evidence of mattering in everyday life. LINKS What It Really Means to Matter How to Build a Life of Contribution with Tom Rath Other Mindfulness in Action episodes -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.
June 12 · 29 min
What It Really Means to Matter
What does it actually mean to matter? In this solo episode, I’m diving into a topic that has been occupying my mind for years and has become a central part of my research, workshops, and the book I’m writing: mattering. Mattering is more than belonging. It’s more than self-esteem. It’s the lived experience of both adding value and feeling valued — to yourself, in your relationships, at work, and in your broader community. And when one of those pieces is missing, achievement can start to feel hollow. This episode is an invitation to look at your own goals, your own striving, and your own relationships with more curiosity. Where do you genuinely feel like you matter? Where does your mattering feel conditional? And where might you be trying to earn recognition from people or places that may never be able to give it? I’m with you on this journey of personal growth, adventure, and our mission to be better every day. Learn more and follow my work: Substack: sonyalooney.substack.com Newsletter: sonyalooney.com/newsletter -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.
S1 · E463
June 4 · 1 hr
How to Build a Life of Contribution with Tom Rath
What if the real value of achievement isn’t what it proves about us, but how it contributes to others? In this episode, I sit down with bestselling author, researcher, and publisher Tom Rath. Tom is known for books like How Full Is Your Bucket?, StrengthsFinder 2.0, Strengths-Based Leadership, and Eat, Move, Sleep. His work has shaped how millions of people think about strengths, well-being, purpose, and the way we spend our days. We talk about the difference between purpose and passion, why strengths only matter when they are used in service of others, how to think about career fit, and why retirement may not be the goal we’ve been taught it is. We also explore the role of AI in the future of work, and how it might free us to spend more time on the creative, relational, and meaningful parts of our lives. This episode is for anyone who wants to keep striving, but in a way that feels more grounded, sustainable, and connected to what really matters. Top 5 Takeaways Achievement feels different when it is connected to contribution Purpose is not the same as passion Strengths need direction Well-being and performance are connected AI may change how we work, but it can also create opportunity LINKS - Learn more about Tom - Read Tom's new book Life's Great Question: Discover How You Contribute To The World - Finding Meaningful Work with Tamara Myles and Wes Adams - Meaning and Mattering at Work with Andrew Soren -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.
S1 · E462
May 21 · 29 min
Mindfulness in Action: Practicing Mental Agility in Real Time
This Mindfulness in Action episode is a real-time practice in mental agility: the ability to notice what’s happening in your thoughts, emotions, and body, and make small adjustments that help you stay aligned with what matters. In the previous solo episode, I talked about mental agility from a more practical and educational lens: emotional agility, attentional agility, mindfulness, and the internal and external shifters that help us regulate and adapt. In this episode, we take those ideas out of the theoretical space and into real life. I recorded this while moving outside, because movement often helps me feel more embodied and aware of what’s happening in my inner world. I talk about resilience, adaptability, psychological flexibility, and the constant adjustments we make as athletes, parents, partners, professionals, and humans trying to do hard things. This episode includes a short mindfulness practice to help you notice where you might feel rigid mentally, emotionally, or behaviorally, and then gently practice shifting. Here's what you'll learn: - Mental agility is resilience in motion - Hard things happen on many scales - Flexibility takes practice - Emotions need space - Small actions build capacity LINKS - Recently solo episode on mental agility - MIA: What It Means to Get Better - MIA: How to Build Human Connection -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.
May 14 · 38 min
Mental Agility: How to Work With Your Emotions, Attention, and Inner Chatter
What does it really mean to be mentally agile? In this solo episode, I’m talking about the emotional and attentional skills that help us notice what’s happening inside of us, create space, and choose our next move with more intention. Mental agility is the ability to shift, adapt, and stay connected to what matters, especially when things don’t go the way we planned. Today, I’lm talking about emotional agility, mindfulness, emotional granularity, and the internal and external “shifters” that can help us adjust in real time. I also walk you through two practical tools: my REAL framework for emotional agility and the 3R tool for attention: recognize, regroup, and refocus. This episode leads us to the next Mindfulness in Action practice, where we’ll take these ideas out of the theoretical space and into real life. Next week, we’ll practice mental agility on the move, using mindfulness as a way to notice shifting in real time. Top 5 Takeaways Mental agility is different from resilience: Resilience often shows up after hard things happen, but mental agility is something we can practice every day. Emotions are data, not directives: Your emotions can tell you what you care about, but they don’t have to decide how you behave. Mindfulness creates space: When you can notice your thoughts, emotions, and body sensations without immediately reacting, you have more choice. Attention is trainable: The 3R tool (recognize, regroup, refocus) can help you come back to the task, the moment, or the next right action. Small shifts matter: Sensation, attention, perspective, physical space, trusted people, and culture can all help us regulate and shift in real time. -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.
S1 · E460
May 7 · 55 min
Rethinking Goals, Striving, and Self-Worth with Jeff Warren and Tasha Schumann
What if so much of our suffering comes from trying to become who we think we’re supposed to be? In this episode, I sit down with meditation teachers Jeff Warren and Tasha Schumann for a wide-ranging, deeply practical conversation about mindfulness, creativity, neurodiversity, and how to let go of the societal “shoulds” that keep us disconnected from ourselves. This conversation felt especially personal to me because so much of it mirrors what I’ve been exploring in my own life as an athlete, a mom, a coach, and now as a writer. We talk about identity transitions, performance-based striving, how endurance sport became a doorway into self-inquiry for me, and why mindfulness has to move beyond the meditation cushion if it’s actually going to change your life. Jeff and Tasha bring warmth, honesty, and a refreshing lack of dogma to this conversation. We explore the tension between external pressure and internal truth, the role of creativity and joy in a meaningful life, and the practical skills of mindfulness: concentration, clarity, and equanimity. If you’ve ever felt like you’re doing all the “right” things but still feel disconnected, if meditation apps feel shallow, or if you’re trying to find a more authentic way to strive, this conversation is for you. Top 5 Takeaways A lot of suffering comes from “shoulds”: External expectations can disconnect us from our actual nature and values. Mindfulness has to move into real life: It’s not just about sitting on a cushion, it’s about how you return to the present in parenting, work, conflict, and creativity. Neurodiversity can be a doorway, not a deficit: Different ways of thinking can challenge conformity and open new paths to self-acceptance. Meditation builds trainable skills: Jeff and Tasha emphasize three core capacities: concentration, clarity, and equanimity. Thriving is not about becoming perfect: It’s about becoming more authentic, more connected, and more able to stay with your experience as it is. LINKS Solo about the problem with should Mindfulness in Action: Letting Go of Should Check out Jeff and Tasha’s podcast Mind Bod Pod Follow Tasha’s Substack Bodhi Savage -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.
S1 · E459
April 23 · 24 min
Mindfulness in Action: Letting Go of “Should”
In this Mindfulness in Action episode, I’m talking about one of the sneakiest forms of distorted thinking: shoulds. You know the ones: I should be doing more. I should have this figured out by now. I should be more disciplined, more patient, more productive. These thoughts can sound helpful on the surface, but often they leave us feeling ashamed, guilty, disconnected, and never quite enough. In this episode, I break down three common types of “shoulds”: the outward-facing shoulds tied to habits and expectations, the shoulds that come from a lack of self-acceptance, and the shoulds rooted in unrealistic standards for ourselves or other people. I also share practical mindfulness tools you can use in real time to work with these thoughts instead of getting hooked by them. We explore practices like labeling, cognitive diffusion, acceptance, self-compassion, psychological distancing, and grounding in the present moment. This is not about getting rid of every self-critical thought forever. It’s about learning how to notice them, soften their grip, and come back to what’s actually here. If you’ve been feeling pressured by your own inner voice lately, this episode is a reminder that you are not alone. There are skillful, compassionate ways to meet yourself in those moments. Other meditations: - Slowing Down the Rush - How to Regulate Your Emotions for Resilience and Performance - How to Combat Self-Criticism -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.
April 16 · 34 min
Decision Fatigue, Perfectionism, and the Problem With “Should”
Ever catch yourself thinking, “I should be better than this. I should be doing more. I should have started earlier” and then spiraling? In this solo episode, I’m diving into the world of "should" and how it quietly drives guilt, shame, and burnout, especially for high performers and ambitious, growth-oriented people. Recently, I injured my rib at my son’s ninja gym birthday party and being forced to pull back on training actually gave me surprising mental relief. So today, I explore why having more ways to train, work, parent, or “optimize” yourself can actually make you feel worse about whatever you choose. Drawing from my background in applied positive psychology and the science of cognitive behavioral therapy, I break down: - The three main categories of “shoulds” - How thinking traps like catastrophizing, personalizing, and overgeneralizing feed the “should” spiral - The difference between neurotic obligations and values-based aspirations - Practical ways to notice your “shoulds,” question the beliefs underneath them - How to decide when to either turn them into concrete, values-aligned plans, or consciously let them go. If you’ve ever felt haunted by the feeling that you’re not doing enough or not far enough along, this episode will help you build awareness, create kinder inner language, and reclaim your energy from unhelpful “shoulds” so you can focus on what truly matters to you. LINKS Episode with Ethan Kross on Chatter James Clear's Atomic Habits Episode with Katy Milkman on How to Change Is self care stressing you out? Solo reflection -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.
April 9 · 58 min
What Flow Really Is: Mindfulness, Self-Trust, and the Challenge-Skill Balance with Dr. Sue Jackson
Flow is one of those words that gets used all the time, but what does it actually mean? And more importantly, how do we create more of it in real life, not just in elite sport or peak performance moments? In this episode, I sit down with Dr. Sue Jackson, one of the world’s leading experts on flow, to talk about what flow really is, how challenge-skill balance works, and why mindfulness, self-efficacy, and trust in your own abilities matter so much in creating these deeply absorbing and meaningful states. We also get into how risk perception shapes flow, why self-consciousness can pull us out of it, and whether neurodivergent hyperfocus is the same thing as flow, or something different. This conversation felt especially relevant to me because I’ve been exploring the overlap between flow, self-transcendent experiences, mindfulness in action, and those moments when you’re fully immersed in something challenging and alive. We talk about sport, yes—but also parenting, presentations, reading research, fatigue, difficult days, and how to work with your attention when life is messy and real. Top 5 Takeaways Flow is not just “being in the zone” Mindfulness supports flow Self-efficacy matters Risk is partly about perception Hyperfocus and flow are not the same thing -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.
March 26 · 19 min
Mindfulness in Action: Redefining What It Means to Get Better
In this Mindfulness in Action episode, I’m recording on a trail run and thinking out loud about something I’ve been re-examining in my own life: the pressure to constantly optimize and get better. We hear it everywhere: be more productive, improve every day, maximize your time. And while growth and striving for excellence matter, I’ve been noticing how easily that mindset turns into pressure, guilt, and a constant feeling of not doing enough. In this episode, I share how I’ve been unlearning that pattern, what it actually means to “strive well,” and why doing less can sometimes lead to better performance, creativity, and well-being. I also guide you through a simple mindfulness practice you can do while moving to help you notice: Where you’re putting pressure on yourself The inner voice telling you to do more How to reconnect with contentment in the middle of effort The goal isn’t to stop growing, it’s to redefine what getting better actually looks like. If you’ve been feeling stuck in the cycle of always needing to do more, this one’s for you. Other meditations: - Slowing Down the Rush - How to Regulate Your Emotions for Resilience and Performance - How to Combat Self-Criticism -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.
S1 · E455
March 19 · 58 min
How to Say What You Mean with Oren Jay Sofer | REPLAY
Sometimes it's hard to say what you mean. Oren Jay Sofer says, "Communication is a learnable skill and it’s one of the most powerful levers for making change in your life and the world." Non-violent communication is about taking responsibility for what we are experiencing using empathy, deep listening, know how to make requests. // This episode is a replay from the Sonya Looney Show. It originally aired October 22, 2020. // Author and renowned meditation instructor Oren Jay Sofer regularly teaches a mindful approach to non-violent communication. spent two and a half years of living as an Anagarika (renunciate) at branch monasteries in the Ajahn Chah Thai Forest lineage. Today, his teaching combines classical Buddhist training with the accessible language of secular mindfulness. Since the early 2000s, Oren has had a deep interest in the relationship between contemplative practice and communication. A graduate of the BayNVC North American Leadership Training, he has taught classes and workshops in Marshall Rosenberg’s Nonviolent Communication (NVC) nationally since 2006. His innovative retreats and online programs in Mindful Communication offer one of the only opportunities in the U.S today to explore the intersection between formal meditation practice, Right Speech and NVC. Oren is the founder and Guiding Teacher of Next Step Dharma, an innovative online course focused on bringing the tools of meditation to daily life, and co-founder of Mindful Healthcare. Oren has created mindfulness programs for organizations, companies, and apps including Apple, Kaiser Permanente, Lumosity, Calm, 10% Happier, Simple Habit and others. I loved his book, Say What You Mean: A Mindful Approach to Nonviolent Communication. In the book, a main theme is that every thought or feeling is there to try to meet a need. If you can try to figure out what need your thoughts are tied to, it's easier to articulate what you need to those around you. It's also useful when listening to someone in a disucssion or conflict to tease out what need they are trying to have met. I also enjoyed learning about conflict and viewing it as a way to deepen relationships. I also learned that non-violent communication and conflict resolution isn't necessarily to try to get someone to do things your way, it's about deepening understanding of one another because sometimes we simply can't agree to have the same viewpoint. Non-violent communication has a framework of observation, the feeling, the needs and values to be met, and the request. Three questions you can ask yourself are what happened, how do I feel about it, and why? I also loved learning about how to use mindfulness in listening and communication as well as how to ground yourself in your own body when tensions rise. Topics Discussed in the Podcast from childhood actor to meditation instructor 4 types of conflict avoidance self-empathy tools for internal pressure No mud, no lotus addressing the voiceless and gender constructs how to make requests of others Resources Oren Jay Sofer's website Get Oren's book: Say What You Mean: A Mindful Approach to Nonviolent Communication -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.
S1 · E454
March 12 · 1 hr 4 min
How to Move from Survival Mode to Thriving: Jon Rosemberg on Agency, Stress, and Success
What if the version of “success” you’ve been chasing is actually keeping you stuck in survival mode? In this episode, I sit down with author and coach Jon Rosemberg to talk about what it really means to move from high-functioning survival into genuine thriving. Jon shares his deeply personal story of growing up in Caracas, Venezuela, living in chronic vigilance, and eventually discovering that achievement and productivity were not the same thing as peace, agency, or well-being. This conversation hit me on a very personal level. So much of what Jon shares mirrors my own journey of questioning performance-based definitions of success, asking whether external accomplishments actually create the feeling I’m looking for, and realizing that thriving often has much more to do with connection, meaning, and agency than with metrics. We talk about the body’s role in helping us recognize survival mode, how to challenge the beliefs that keep us trapped in proving and performing, and Jon’s practical AIR framework: Awareness, Inquiry, and Reframing. If you’ve ever felt like you’re doing all the “right” things but still feel off, disconnected, or chronically on edge, this conversation is for you. Here’s what you’ll learn: Thriving is not the same as success Survival mode can look high-functioning Somatic awareness matters Agency can be practiced Connection is essential to thriving LINKS Follow Jon on Instagram Visit Jon's website to learn more about his book Meaningful Work with Tamara Myles and Wes Adams Defining and Feeling Success -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.

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