Don’t Scare the Newbies!

kirizal & S

Kink can be scary, but talking about it doesn’t have to be! S and kirizal, a couple in a 24/7 Total Power Exchange relationship chat about kink, sex, relationships, communication, and everything in between

Winner of Best Media, Alternative Awards 2026

Follow kirizal’s blog and find all their socials at www.kirizal.com

Support U/us on Patreon at patreon.com/dontscarethenewbies

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50 episodes
Updated Wednesday
Explicit

Episodes50

Newest first

Oct 22, 2025 · 1 hr 28 min
Just Because They Can: BDSM Contracts & Rules Part Two
In the last episode, kirizal and S talked contracts - and the development of the fixed foundation of O/our power exchange. Now it’s onto the living document of O/our rules - covering protocol, limits, punishment, and the fine details of a life built together to bring kink out from the dungeon and into the ordinary and the every day. Part two of O/our two-parter on the filthy, nerdy structure of O/our dynamic.
Oct 15, 2025 · 1 hr 28 min
At Their Absolute Discretion: BDSM Contracts & Rules Part One
Contracts, rules, formal reviews and paperwork - hot, right? The formal structure of power exchange relationships can often sound like boring admin from the outside, but for two self confessed sex nerds, writing a contract together was like months of foreplay. In this episode, S and kirizal talk about the journey to O/our first contract of Total Power Exchange and talk through everything that goes into it - the responsibilities, risks, commitment and joy. This episode is part one of two, with next week’s episode focusing on the rules that exist in constant evolution alongside the fixed foundation of the contract.
Oct 8, 2025 · 1 hr 23 min
Controlled Violations: Consensual Non-Consent and Modifying Consent for Kink
One of O/our favourite - and often very misunderstood and oversimplified kinks - is CNC: consensual non-consent. Exploring violation, control, violence, and surrender in both play and O/our dynamic is something that draws U/us both - but how do you keep focus on the “first C” when playing in the darkest parts of your mind? Is it safe? Is it ethical? And is it really just about “forced” fantasies or is there more to it? W/we answer all of that and more! Content Note: This episode includes detailed discussion of consensual non-consent play involving strong violence and simulated sexual assault, non-safeword play and dynamics
Oct 1, 2025 · 1 hr 31 min
31 Days of Kink: Beating a Play Slump
W/we sit down to share tips on overcoming a play slump, finding ways to create time and space for all kinds of intimacy when life gets in the way. In July 2025 W/we set a challenge to do something kinky every day for 31 days and almost succeeded - including the most intense and brutal beating kirizal has ever taken and a life changing camping trip, so in this episode W/we recap some highlights from this challenge and what it taught U/us. The blog post referenced in this episode is ‘Sixty-Five’ on kirizal.com Content Note: This episode includes discussion of consensual non-consent play involving heavy impact and simulated sexual assault, discussion of play involving blood and vomit, and no-safeword play
Sep 24, 2025 · 1 hr 25 min
i Can Do This All Day: O/our First Interrogation
Recorded two days after the most brutal, intense, and transformative scene W/we have ever done, kirizal and S abandon O/our regularly scheduled content to relive the three hour interrogation scene that was more than two months in the making. Talking about the practical elements, negotiation, emotional impact, and kirizal’s top tips to endure torture. The blog post referenced in this episode is ‘Not Friends (Ain’t That The Worst Thing You Ever Heard)’ at kirizal.com Content Note: This episode contains mention of heavy physical and emotional sadism including blood, burns, breath play, and psychological torture.
Sep 17, 2025 · 1 hr 38 min
Unhinged Pussy Witchcraft: All About Sex
Not all kink involves sex, and not all sex involves kink, but the crossover between the two is a lot of fun! W/we talk sexual communication, overcoming sexual function challenges, and kirizal demands answers to where S learned Their skills in unhinged pussy witchcraft Content Note: This episode includes discussion of blood play, vomit, and fantasies about sexual assault
Sep 10, 2025 · 1 hr 8 min
Communication is Key: Communication in D/s Relationships
As you might expect from a couple with a kink podcast, talking about kink is one of O/our favourite things to do! But communication in power exchange relationships is about more than that - in this episode W/we talk about consent models, negotiation, risk management, and the importance of regular check ins - with some clips from one of O/our monthly dynamic review sessions to show how it works! Content Note: This episode includes brief discussion of consensual non-consent play involving simulated sexual assault
Sep 3, 2025 · 44 min
Opening the Box: Meet the Hosts
Get to know kirizal and S - O/our earliest kink experiences, kirizal’s chronic over-sharing vs S’s more reserved and private nature, and how on earth that combination led to a podcast about O/our most intimate moments Content Note: This episode includes brief discussion of addiction, and consensual non-consent play involving simulated sexual assault
Sep 3, 2025 · 1 hr 17 min
Sex Perverts Club: Getting Started in Kink
The world of kink sounds intimidating and complicated, so how does anyone get started? kirizal and S talk about O/our starting points, and how (and why) W/we found O/our way into the kink community after exploring alone. Risk, adventure, and connection - let’s talk about everything involved in getting into kink.
Aug 25, 2025 · 1 min
Episode One Preview Clip
A little snippet of what’s to come!