Self-Doubt After Growing Up With a Toxic Parent: Why You Gaslight Yourself and How to Move Forward

Self-doubt is one of the most common and paralyzing struggles for cycle breakers. In this episode of the You’re Not Crazy Podcast, Torie explains why chronic self-doubt is not a personality flaw, but a trauma response rooted in long-term gaslighting and emotional invalidation.

You’ll learn how growing up in a toxic family system trains you to distrust your own memories, emotions, and decisions, and why self-doubt often shows up most intensely when you start setting boundaries, becoming more assertive, or trying to live differently than your family expects. Torie breaks down how “self-gaslighting” develops, why it makes adult decision-making feel overwhelming, and how awareness can help you stop treating this voice as truth.

This episode is especially relevant if you:

Were told you were too sensitive, dramatic, or wrong about your experiences

Second-guess your boundaries and feel tempted to backtrack

Freeze when making decisions because you are afraid of choosing wrong

Feel stuck even though you are trying to heal and break the cycle

Most importantly, this conversation reframes self-doubt as a normal byproduct of growing up in a dysfunctional family, not evidence that you are incapable, broken, or failing at healing.

The Cycle Breaker's Vault is Torie's self-guided course for the adult children of parents with borderline and narcissistic traits. It covers dysfunctional family dynamics, boundaries, manipulation, grief, and reconnecting with yourself.

Learn more and get started at confidentboundaries.com/vault

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Disclaimer: This podcast is not therapy. If you’re in crisis, please call the 988 Crisis Lifeline.

You're Not Crazy is owned and produced by Torie Wiksell and Confident Boundaries, LLC.