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Your Traitor Within

Jessica Anne Pressler, LCSW

Jessica Anne Pressler LCSW came up with the concept Traitor Within to give people a tangible and workable tool that help identify and overcome their repetitive self-sabotaging behavior. Her hope is that once a person gains insight into their Traitor Within, then they can begin to silence their traitor, thus empowering themselves and begin to heal. “Your Traitor Within” will feature conversations and stories about toxicity, healing, empowerment, and more.

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August 19 · 55 min
Your Traitor Within: Breaking Generational Silence with Sally Wolfe
Jessica Anne Pressler, LCSW, is joined by author Sally Lefton Wolfe for a deeply personal conversation about Holocaust survival, intergenerational trauma, grief, and learning to express emotions after growing up in a family where so much went unspoken. Sally was raised by two Holocaust survivors from Czechoslovakia who endured multiple concentration camps. Her parents were loving, but the enormity of what they had survived was rarely discussed. As a child, Sally knew something was different. She had no grandparents, fewer relatives than many of her friends, and a mother who experienced nightmares and intense reactions connected to the past. Without anyone explicitly telling her to suppress her emotions, Sally learned to keep much of what she felt inside. As an adult, she began noticing similar patterns among other children of Holocaust survivors. She started interviewing members of the second generation, and that research eventually became her book, The Survivor’s Legacy. Through those stories, Sally encountered the many ways unresolved trauma could shape the next generation, from difficulty expressing emotion and intense fears around safety to overprotection, anger, anxiety, and the pressure to simply “carry on.” One of the most moving parts of the episode comes when Sally discusses the sudden death of her first husband, when her sons were only 10 and 16. Her first instinct was to hide her grief from them. Then she realized that doing so would teach them the same lesson she had absorbed as a child: painful feelings should remain hidden. Sally made a conscious decision to let her sons see her sadness and give them permission to speak about their own grief. Jessica connects Sally’s experience to the Traitor Within framework: the protective parts we develop early in life can help us manage what feels unbearable, but those same defenses can become restrictive in adulthood. For Sally, the emotional “wall” once served a purpose. Healing now involves learning that she can lower that wall slowly, experience difficult feelings, and allow safe people to support her. They also discuss grief after losing a spouse, loving again without erasing the person who died, the importance of keeping Holocaust testimony alive as survivors age, and why breaking an intergenerational pattern does not require rejecting the generations who came before us. About Sally Wolfe Sally Wolfe is the author of The Survivor’s Legacy, a book informed by her experience growing up as the daughter of two Holocaust survivors and her interviews with other members of the second generation. Order The Survivor’s Legacy: https://www.amazon.com/Survivors-Legacy-Holocaust-Shaped-Generations-ebook/dp/B08T7Q3T8S Instagram: @sallylefton Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/sally.lefton Preorder Jessica’s Novel Jessica Anne Pressler’s debut novel, Traitor Within: How Her Fear of Abandonment Led Her to Abandon Herself, is available for preorder now and releases September 22. Like this week’s conversation, the novel explores what happens when protective patterns formed early in life continue shaping us long after the original circumstances have changed. Through Casandra’s story, Jessica examines fear of abandonment, self-abandonment, trauma, relationships, and what it takes to finally trust yourself. As a special preorder gift, readers will receive a full year of guided Your Traitor Within journaling prompts. Preorder here: https://www.jessicaannepressler.com/the-books Support the show
August 12 · 45 min
Your Traitor Within: Coercive Control and Protective Parenting with Dr. Christine Cocchiola
Jessica Anne Pressler, LCSW, is joined by Dr. Christine M. Cocchiola, DSW, LCSW, an internationally recognized expert on coercive control and its impact on adult and child victims. Dr. Cocchiola earned her Doctorate in Clinical Social Work from NYU, where she was mentored by Dr. Evan Stark, and now works as a college professor, therapeutic parenting and divorce/custody coach, advocate, author, educator, and survivor. She is the creator of The Protective Parenting Program, host of Perfect Prey: A Coercive Control Podcast, author of Every Moment of Every Day, and co-author of FRAMED: Women in the Family Court Underworld. Jessica and Christine begin with a truth both women know personally: education does not make someone immune from an abusive or coercively controlling relationship. Christine describes research identifying common traits among victims and survivors such as conscientiousness, agreeableness, loyalty, optimism, and the instinct to fix problems, qualities that can become vulnerabilities in the hands of a highly manipulative person. They discuss how coercive control affects children even when there is no physical violence. Children may learn to hide parts of themselves, perform for approval, monitor a parent’s moods, or gradually lose trust in a safe caregiver. Christine explains why preserving or rebuilding attachment with the protective parent is central to healing and why connection often has to come before traditional discipline or correction. Christine also shares her own experience of slowly recognizing what had been happening inside her family, including the moment her daughter revealed that the undermining of their relationship had begun years earlier. She explains how seemingly small comments can reshape a child’s perception over time without ever sounding like an obvious attack. The conversation also explores emotional and psychological abuse, trauma bonds, anger after prolonged subjugation, post-separation abuse, family court, repair, and the enormous emotional discipline required of a protective parent. Christine emphasizes that repair includes accountability, unconditional apologies, emotional regulation, and allowing children to experience a safe parent who remains present, accepting, authentic, and non-reactive. Connect with Dr. Christine Cocchiola Website: www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com Instagram: @dr.cocchiola_coercivecontrol Learn more about The Protective Parenting Program, therapeutic parenting and divorce/custody coaching, professional coercive-control training, and Dr. Cocchiola’s free community for protective mothers and support resources for protective fathers. Preorder Jessica’s Novel Jessica’s debut novel, Traitor Within: How Her Fear of Abandonment Led Her to Abandon Herself, is available for preorder now and releases September 22. The novel explores many of the themes at the heart of this conversation through fiction: coercive and toxic relationships, childhood protective patterns, fear of abandonment, self-abandonment, and the long process of learning to trust yourself again. Preorder here: https://www.jessicaannepressler.com/the-books As a special preorder gift, readers will also receive a full year of guided Your Traitor Within journaling prompts for healing, reflection, and self-discovery. Support the show
August 5 · 1 hr 5 min
Your Traitor Within: Growing from the Ashes with Sheila Lowe
In this episode of Your Traitor Within, Jessica Anne Pressler, LCSW, sits down with Sheila Lowe, a certified forensic handwriting examiner with a Master of Science in Psychology and the author of nonfiction, forensic mystery, paranormal suspense, and memoir. Her book Growing from the Ashes chronicles the spiritual journey that followed the murder of her daughter, Jennifer, in 2000. Sheila begins with her childhood in England and her upbringing in the Jehovah’s Witness faith, a religious environment she now describes as a cult. She later married a congregation elder who was admired and trusted in public but abusive at home. Sheila recalls the moment her three-year-old daughter watched him speak from the platform and quietly asked, “Mommy, how come he’s not like that at home?” When Sheila sought help after he choked her and left a mark on her neck, another elder dismissed the violence rather than protecting her. Leaving the marriage also meant losing the community that had shaped nearly every part of her life. Sheila was expelled from the religion and cut off from the support system she had been taught to depend upon. She describes the grief, isolation, and suicidal thoughts that followed, as well as the moment she realized that although other people could take away her marriage, community, and former identity, they could not take away her mind. Jessica and Sheila trace the roots of Sheila’s Traitor Within to childhood. At fourteen, after Sheila’s father left, her mother told her that she wanted to throw herself under a train. Sheila assumed responsibility for keeping her mother alive and remained in the religion partly because she feared what leaving might do to her. That parentified role followed her into adulthood through people-pleasing, rescuing, staying too long in damaging relationships, and feeling responsible for everyone else’s survival. Jessica explains how a strategy that once helped a child maintain safety can become a misguided protective part in adulthood. Rather than condemning that part, she encourages Sheila to understand what it was trying to accomplish and meet it with compassion. Sheila offers one of the episode’s most meaningful reflections: if she can extend grace to her mother for doing the best she was capable of, she must learn to offer herself that same grace. The conversation then turns to the murder of Sheila’s daughter, Jennifer, by her partner. Sheila speaks openly about the phone call that changed her life, the complicated grief that followed, and the ways she had already been grieving for her daughter during years of instability and painful choices. She also discusses the handwriting sample she examined before the tragedy and the warning signs she believed she saw in it, including a note she made about the potential for explosive behavior. After Jennifer’s death, Sheila began noticing events she interpreted as signs of her daughter’s continued presence: unexplained phone calls filled with static, lights turning on in her car, electronics behaving unusually, and a car alarm sounding as the funeral procession reached the burial site. These experiences helped transform the rigid beliefs of her childhood into a personal spiritual understanding that Sheila describes as “life after earth.” Sheila also shares why it took more than twenty years to write Growing from the Ashes. She knew the title almost immediately after Jennifer’s death, but she was not yet ready to tell the story. Decades later, after repeated encouragement to write something autobiographical, Sheila began the manuscript on February 1 and wrote “The End” on February 27. The result is a memoir about religious control, domestic abuse, motherhood, unbearable loss, forgiveness, spirituality, and the meaning Sheila found on the other side of grief. The power of storytelling is central to this episode. Sheila’s memoir gives readers a way to witness her experiences and recognize parts of their own lives through hers. That same belief in the power of story is at the heart of Jessica’s debut novel, Traitor Within. Through Casandra, the novel explores how conditional belonging, fear of abandonment, manipulation, and old protective patterns can lead a woman to slowly erase herself in the name of love. Traitor Within is now available for preorder and will be released September 22. As a thank-you, everyone who preorders will receive a complimentary year of guided Your Traitor Within journaling prompts. Preorder Jessica’s novel: https://www.jessicaannepressler.com/the-books About Sheila Lowe Sheila Lowe is a certified forensic handwriting examiner with a Master of Science in Psychology. She is the author of The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Handwriting Analysis, Handwriting of the Famous and Infamous, an award-winning forensic handwriting mystery series, the Beyond the Veil paranormal suspense series, and the memoir Growing from the Ashes. Her work brings together psychology, handwriting analysis, mystery, spirituality, and her own lived experience of grief and transformation. Connect With Sheila Lowe Books and author information: https://www.sheilalowebooks.com Forensic handwriting services and information: https://www.sheilalowe.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/SheilaLoweBooks Listen to Your Traitor Within: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/your-traitor-within/id1797804404 Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@JessicaAnnePressler Content note: This episode includes discussions of religious trauma, domestic violence, suicidal ideation, addiction, murder-suicide, and the death of a child. Please listen with care. If you are in immediate danger, call 911. If you are in the United States and experiencing a mental health crisis or suicidal thoughts, call or text 988. Support the show
July 22 · 1 hr 9 min
Your Traitor Within: You Can’t Think Your Way Out of a Trauma Bond with Kendall Brown
Why can you fully understand that a relationship is harming you and still feel unable to leave? Jessica Anne Pressler, LCSW, is joined by Kendall Brown, a certified Women’s Somatic Trauma & Relationship Coach and creator of The Secure Woman Era. After nearly a decade in back-to-back relationships with avoidant, emotionally abusive, and narcissistic men, Kendall began examining the childhood wounds and protective patterns that kept drawing her back into the same relationship cycle. Kendall explains her approach to somatic shadow work, which combines an exploration of the rejected or hidden parts of the self with body-based and nervous-system work. She and Jessica discuss why insight alone may not break a trauma bond. You can understand the relationship intellectually, recognize every red flag, and still experience an intense physical pull toward the person who hurt you. They connect this experience to the Traitor Within: the protective part formed in childhood that once helped you maintain safety, love, or connection. The child who became the fixer, good girl, peacekeeper, high achiever, or emotional caretaker may become an adult who ignores mistreatment, manages a partner’s emotions, and mistakes self-abandonment for love. Jessica and Kendall also discuss the importance of becoming securely single, learning to recognize anger as useful information, grieving the relationship and future you believed you were going to have, and building support that understands why leaving a trauma bond is different from recovering from an ordinary breakup. In this episode: Why familiar relationship dynamics can feel like chemistry The difference between self-sabotage and outdated self-protection How abandonment wounds can lead you to abandon yourself Why fixers and deeply empathic people may stay focused on someone’s potential How trauma bonds can continue in the body after the relationship ends Why anger can alert you that a boundary has been crossed The value of professional support, community, and trusted friends during recovery What it means to become securely single before dating again How to build a life that a relationship must add to rather than complete The question that can clarify whether you are loving someone or waiting for them to change Jessica and Kendall leave listeners with an important question: If your partner and the relationship never changed, would you be happy living exactly this way for the rest of your life? About Kendall Brown Kendall Brown is a certified Women’s Somatic Trauma & Relationship Coach and the creator of The Secure Woman Era. Drawing from her own experience healing anxious attachment, leaving a trauma bond, and breaking a cycle of toxic relationships, Kendall now helps women heal their relationship patterns, become secure within themselves, and pursue healthy, emotionally available love. Follow Kendall on Instagram: @kendallbrowncoaching https://www.instagram.com/kendallbrowncoaching/ Learn more about The Secure Woman Era Mastermind: https://secure-woman-era.kendallbrownwellness.com/ Content note: This conversation includes discussion of emotional and narcissistic abuse, infidelity, trauma bonds, divorce, grief, and suicidal ideation. Please listen with care and seek qualified professional or emergency support when needed. Support the show
July 15 · 1 hr
Your Traitor Within: Starting Over After Narcissistic Abuse with Liz Spicer
In this episode of Your Traitor Within, Jessica Anne Pressler sits down with Liz Spicer, a survivor of childhood sexual abuse, a certified functional medicine practitioner, and a trauma-informed coach who helps women rebuild their lives after emotionally abusive relationships. Liz spent twenty years in a marriage marked by emotional abuse before leaving at age fifty and beginning the difficult process of rediscovering herself. Together, Jessica and Liz explore the grief that follows leaving a long-term relationship, why healing often begins only after the relationship ends, and how the "Traitor Within" can keep survivors questioning themselves long after they've escaped the abuse. The conversation examines the profound grief that accompanies divorce later in life. Jessica and Liz discuss mourning the future you imagined, the years you invested, your sense of identity, your changing body, your sexuality, and the version of yourself that slowly disappeared inside the relationship. They explain why grief is not a sign that leaving was the wrong decision—it is part of healing. Liz courageously shares her own story of childhood sexual abuse, growing up feeling unseen, entering a marriage that repeated familiar emotional patterns, and eventually recognizing that what she believed was love was actually emotional abuse. Jessica and Liz discuss trauma bonds, love bombing, radical acceptance, cognitive dissonance, and the difficult realization that healing requires understanding both the narcissist and the parts of ourselves that kept us there. They also explore what happens after leaving. Many survivors believe freedom should feel immediate, yet Liz explains that this is often when grief truly begins. Jessica emphasizes that healing is not simply understanding what happened to you—it is understanding why it felt familiar, why your Traitor Within protected the relationship, and how to build a life that no longer requires self-abandonment. The episode also addresses parenting, breaking intergenerational trauma, rebuilding confidence after years of emotional abuse, nervous system healing, journaling, functional medicine, and learning to trust yourself again. This conversation is a reminder that leaving is not the end of the journey. It is often where healing finally begins. About Liz Spicer: Liz Spicer holds degrees in Biology, Forensic Science, and Nursing Practice and is a certified functional medicine practitioner, certified RCT coach, and certified trauma-informed coach. After surviving a twenty-year emotionally abusive marriage, she now helps midlife women navigate the confusion, grief, and identity shifts that follow leaving long-term relationships. Her work combines medical knowledge, trauma education, nervous system healing, and lived experience to help women recognize that they are not broken—they are rebuilding. Connect with Liz Spicer: Instagram: @midlifehealingjourney Website: www.midlifehealingjourney.com Listen to Your Traitor Within: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/your-traitor-within/id1797804404 Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@JessicaAnnePressler Support the show
July 9 · 1 hr 1 min
Your Traitor Within: You Are Not Crazy with Kiki Mullican
In this episode of Your Traitor Within, Jessica Anne Pressler sits down with Kiki Mullican, a certified neuroscience coach with an undergraduate degree in psychology and more than 20 years of experience in mental health, human services, suicide prevention, case management, and community support. Kiki’s work focuses on childhood conditioning, toxic family systems, scapegoating, trauma patterns, and the ways early experiences shape adult relationships, identity, and survival strategies. Kiki shares how her fascination with psychology began as a child in the library, reading books she hoped would help her understand and fix the painful dynamics inside her family. She and Jessica discuss what happens when a child becomes the one trying to save everyone, why knowledge alone cannot change people who are not ready to change, and how family systems can turn the person naming the dysfunction into the problem. Together, Jessica and Kiki explore scapegoating, parentification, addiction, toxic family roles, chronic illness, agoraphobia, OCD, trauma bonds, cognitive dissonance, and the long process of learning that survival patterns are not personality flaws. Kiki speaks openly about growing up in a frightening family system, becoming the family scapegoat, trying to “fix” her mother, and later recognizing how familiar patterns continued to show up in relationships, health, self-perception, and her ability to feel safe in the world. The conversation also goes deeply into agoraphobia and the misconceptions around what it actually looks like. Kiki explains that for her, agoraphobia is not simply a fear of leaving the house. It is often a fear of people, judgment, being watched, being misunderstood, and being attacked for visible and invisible limitations. She shares how healing has happened through tiny exposures, setbacks, support, and learning to celebrate progress even when it does not look perfect from the outside. Jessica and Kiki also discuss suicide prevention, the importance of small moments of human connection, and why hearing “you are not crazy, you are not alone, and it really did happen” can become one of the first steps toward healing. Kiki’s current work through The Trauma Drama Mama helps people recognize trauma patterns, understand toxic family systems, and find language for experiences they may have spent years believing were only happening to them. This episode is for anyone who grew up feeling like the problem, spent years trying to earn love or fix a family system, or is learning now that self-awareness is only the beginning. Healing also requires support, community, repetition, and the courage to keep going even when it feels impossible. About Kiki Mullican: Kiki Mullican has an undergraduate degree in psychology and more than 20 years of experience working in mental health, human services, and community support roles. Her background includes work as a counselor, case manager, suicide prevention instructor, and volunteer VP of Operations for a Baltimore-based nonprofit serving individuals experiencing homelessness, addiction, and re-entry challenges after incarceration. She is also a certified neuroscience coach and a proud U.S. Army veteran. Her work bridges psychology concepts with lived experience, making complex emotional dynamics accessible and understandable for everyday people. Connect with Kiki Mullican: Instagram, Threads, and TikTok: @the.trauma.drama.mama Facebook: Facebook.com/thetraumadramamama Listen to Your Traitor Within: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/your-traitor-within/id1797804404 Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@JessicaAnnePressler If this episode brings up thoughts of suicide or immediate safety concerns, call or text 988 in the U.S. for the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. Support the show
July 1 · 37 min
Your Traitor Within: Choosing Purpose Over Pain with Dr. Louise Beaubrun-Macaluso
In this deeply moving episode of Your Traitor Within, Jessica Anne Pressler sits down with psychologist, author, speaker, and podcast host Dr. Louise Beaubrun-Macaluso for a conversation about unimaginable loss, trauma, resilience, people-pleasing, grief, and discovering purpose after adversity. At just nineteen years old, Dr. Louise survived a devastating house fire that claimed the lives of five family members, including three of her younger sisters. She sustained third-degree burns over more than 70 percent of her body, underwent countless surgeries, and experienced limb amputations. Faced with overwhelming physical and emotional trauma, she made a life-changing decision: she would not allow tragedy to define the rest of her life. Together, Jessica and Dr. Louise discuss survivor's guilt, grief, body image after trauma, resilience, cognitive reframing, mindfulness, and the emotional work required to move from surviving to truly living. The conversation also explores the Traitor Within through the lens of people-pleasing, boundary-setting, and self-worth. Dr. Louise shares how losing her husband to COVID became another turning point in her healing journey, forcing her to stop abandoning her own needs in order to meet everyone else's expectations. This episode is a reminder that healing does not erase pain. It transforms our relationship with it. About Dr. Louise Beaubrun-Macaluso: Dr. Louise Beaubrun-Macaluso is a psychologist, author, speaker, and podcast host. After surviving a near-fatal house fire that profoundly changed her life, she dedicated her career to helping others navigate trauma, grief, resilience, emotional healing, and personal transformation. Through her private practice, speaking engagements, and writing, she empowers others to move beyond survival and create lives filled with purpose. Connect with Dr. Louise: Website: www.brokentobeblessed.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/loulouse08/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/me?trk=p_mwlite_feed-secondary_nav Listen to Your Traitor Within: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/your-traitor-within/id1797804404 Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@JessicaAnnePressler Support the show
June 24 · 51 min
Your Traitor Within: When Your Ex Turns the Kids Against You with Lisa Johnson
In this episode of Your Traitor Within, Jessica Anne Pressler sits down with Lisa Johnson, co-founder of Been There Got Out, high-conflict divorce strategist, certified domestic violence advocate, author, and legal abuse educator. Lisa shares her extraordinary journey through high-conflict divorce, representing herself through scores of court appearances, helping pass Jennifers’ Law in Connecticut, and having her own case published in the Connecticut Law Journal, where it is now being used as legal precedent. Jennifers’ Law made Connecticut the third state in America to expand its legal definition of domestic violence to include coercive control. Together, Jessica and Lisa explore the reality that abuse often does not end when a relationship ends. They discuss coercive control, litigation abuse, custody battles, post-separation abuse, co-parenting chaos, and the ways manipulative partners may continue exerting power through the court system, finances, and children. The conversation also focuses on Lisa and Chris’s newest book, When Your Ex Turns the Kids Against You, released in March 2026 with a foreword by Bill Eddy. Lisa explains why children may reject a loving parent, how alienating behaviors impact entire families, and what parents can do to preserve relationships with their children during high-conflict separations. This episode is filled with practical insight, validation, and hope for anyone navigating high-conflict divorce, legal abuse, custody battles, estrangement, or parent-child contact problems. About Lisa Johnson: Lisa Johnson is the co-founder of Been There Got Out, a high-conflict divorce strategist and certified domestic violence advocate who successfully represented herself through scores of court appearances. Her case, published in the Connecticut Law Journal, is being used as legal precedent. Her live testimony helped pass Jennifers’ Law in Connecticut, the third state in America to expand its legal definition of domestic violence to include coercive control. She and her partner, Chris, coach people in high-conflict relationships, divorce, custody battles, and co-parenting hell so they have the chance of the best outcome in family court and beyond. They also offer a weekly Legal Abuse Support Group for those dealing with narcissistic opponents in legal matters. Their first book is Been There Got Out: Toxic Relationships, High-Conflict Divorce, and How to Stay Sane Under Insane Circumstances, and their second book, When Your Ex Turns the Kids Against You, released in March 2026 with a foreword by Bill Eddy. Connect with Lisa Johnson / Been There Got Out: Website: https://beentheregotout.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/been_there_got_out/ First Book: Been There Got Out: Toxic Relationships, High-Conflict Divorce, and How to Stay Sane Under Insane Circumstances https://www.amazon.com/Been-There-Got-Relationships-Circumstances/dp/194627495X/ Second Book: When Your Ex Turns the Kids Against You https://www.amazon.com/Been-There-Got-Out-Against/dp/1967674183/ Free Strategic Communication Webinar: https://programs.beentheregotout.com/SC-Register Listen to Your Traitor Within: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/your-traitor-within/id1797804404 Support the show
June 17 · 38 min
Your Traitor Within: Reclaiming Your Voice After Coercive Control with Jennifer Parker
In this episode of Your Traitor Within, Jessica Anne Pressler sits down with therapist, author, and educator Jennifer Parker, MSSW, for a powerful conversation about coercive control, intimate partner abuse, healing, and the internalized messages survivors carry long after a relationship ends. Jennifer is the author of Coercive Relationships: Find the Answers You Seek and the creator of the Journey to Healing intervention framework. Through her work with Find Your Voice: End the Silence, she trains therapists to better recognize coercive control and support survivors of abuse with greater skill, awareness, and compassion. Together, Jessica and Jennifer discuss why so many therapists historically missed the signs of coercive control, the dangers of treating symptoms without understanding context, and why survivors so often leave therapy feeling blamed rather than understood. They explore the overlap between Jennifer's concept of the "internalized abuser" and Jessica's framework of the Traitor Within, examining how childhood experiences, family dynamics, and abusive relationships can shape self-worth, self-doubt, and decision-making. Jennifer also shares her own Traitor Within story, including the painful awakening that followed infidelity in her first marriage, the childhood experiences that shaped her self-esteem, and the healing journey that ultimately led her to become an advocate, educator, and voice for survivors. This conversation is a reminder that healing is not about fixing what is wrong with you. It is about recognizing what happened to you, reclaiming your voice, and learning to trust yourself again. About Jennifer Parker: Jennifer Parker, MSSW, is a therapist, author of Coercive Relationships: Find the Answers You Seek, and creator of the Journey to Healing intervention framework. Through her work with Find Your Voice: End the Silence, she provides training and resources that help therapists support survivors of coercive control and intimate partner abuse. Connect with Jennifer Parker: Website: https://www.findyourvoicehealing.com/ Book: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1684336678/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jenniferc.parker/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/JenniferCParkerMSSW LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/jennifer-parker-therapy-training-consultation/ Email: jennifer@findyourvoicehealing.com Support the show
June 11 · 40 min
Your Traitor Within: Why We Self-Sabotage Success with Nikki Heyder
The Business Behind the Trauma: Self-Sabotage, People-Pleasing, and the Entrepreneur's Traitor Within with Nikki Heyder. In this episode of Your Traitor Within, Jessica Anne Pressler sits down with psychotherapist, author, and business mentor Nikki Heyder for a powerful conversation about the psychological patterns that quietly shape our careers, businesses, relationships, and sense of self-worth. Drawing from her unique background in both psychotherapy and business, Nikki explores the hidden reasons so many entrepreneurs struggle to execute even when they know exactly what they need to do. Together, Jessica and Nikki discuss self-sabotage, people-pleasing, perfectionism, hyper-independence, fear of visibility, imposter syndrome, and the internal barriers that often prevent people from fully stepping into their potential. Nikki shares her own Traitor Within story, including the childhood experiences that shaped her tendency toward people-pleasing and how those patterns followed her into romantic relationships, business decisions, burnout, over-delivering, undercharging, and eventually the collapse of a business she spent years building. This conversation explores the intersection of trauma, entrepreneurship, self-worth, and healing. Jessica and Nikki discuss why strategy alone is rarely enough, how nervous system patterns influence success, the importance of self-compassion, and why curiosity may be one of the most powerful tools available for personal growth. If you've ever known what you needed to do but found yourself unable to do it, this episode offers insight, understanding, and hope. About Nikki Heyder: Nikki Heyder is a psychotherapist, published author, and business mentor with more than 13 years of entrepreneurial experience. Holding both a Bachelor's Degree in Business and Organisational Behaviour and a Master's Degree in Psychotherapy, Nikki combines clinical psychological insight with practical business strategy. She specializes in helping heart-led entrepreneurs and business owners move beyond self-sabotage, burnout, perfectionism, visibility fears, and internal limitations by addressing the psychological patterns and nervous system responses that influence growth. Her work supports clients in building businesses that feel as good on the inside as they look on the outside. Connect with Nikki: Website: https://www.the-soul-institute.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nikki.heyder The Foundation Lab: https://www.the-soul-institute.com/the-foundation-lab Becoming Mastermind: https://www.the-soul-institute.com/becoming Regulate & Receive: https://www.the-soul-institute.com/regulate-receive Listen to Your Traitor Within: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/your-traitor-within/id1797804404 Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@JessicaAnnePressler Support the show
June 3 · 45 min
YTW: From Human Doing to Human Being: Nervous System Healing, Functional Freeze, and Trauma Recovery with Caroline Strawson
In this episode of Your Traitor Within, Jessica Anne Pressler sits down with Caroline Strawson, award-winning nervous system expert, Hay House author, speaker, and survivor of domestic abuse, coercive control, homelessness, and profound personal adversity. Caroline shares the deeply personal journey that led her from PTSD, anxiety, panic attacks, debt, and the loss of her family home to becoming one of the leading voices in nervous system healing and trauma recovery today. Together, Jessica and Caroline explore the connection between childhood wounds, narcissistic abuse, codependency, trauma responses, and the nervous system. They discuss functional freeze, emotional regulation, Internal Family Systems, somatic healing, people-pleasing, perfectionism, and the ways many survivors unknowingly spend years trapped in survival mode while appearing functional from the outside. Caroline shares how the death of her mother, the collapse of her marriage, and the realization that traditional approaches to healing were not fully addressing her trauma led her to discover the missing piece: the nervous system. She explains why awareness alone is often not enough, how unresolved trauma becomes stored in the body, and why true healing requires more than simply understanding what happened. This powerful conversation also explores intergenerational trauma, parenting, self-worth, shame, boundaries, grief, and the process of moving from being a “human doing” to a “human being.” Caroline offers practical insight into why survivors often remain stuck, why time alone does not heal trauma, and how building nervous system capacity creates lasting change. If you have ever wondered why you continue to react in ways you understand intellectually but cannot seem to change emotionally, this episode is for you. About Caroline Strawson: Caroline Strawson is an award-winning nervous system expert, trauma educator, speaker, Hay House author, and survivor of domestic abuse and coercive control. Through her work she helps people understand the connection between trauma, the nervous system, physical health, and emotional wellbeing. Caroline is the founder of multiple trauma-informed businesses and has helped thousands of people move from survival into safety, self-trust, and resilience. Connect with Caroline Strawson: Website: https://carolinestrawson.com/ Instagram: @carolinestrawson Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/carolinestrawson/ YouTube: @novisiblebruises Listen to Your Traitor Within: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/your-traitor-within/id1797804404 Support the show
May 28 · 41 min
Your Traitor Within: Dr. Debra Kessler - The Child Who Learned to Shapeshift
In this episode of Your Traitor Within, Jessica Anne Pressler sits down with Dr. Debra Kessler, a licensed clinical psychologist, child neurodiversity specialist, and former pediatric nurse with more than 20 years of experience helping families better understand the emotional, neurological, and developmental needs of children. Together, they explore how the “Traitor Within” begins forming in childhood through messaging, modeling, attachment wounds, and family systems, and how those early survival strategies later shape adult relationships, identity, self-worth, and emotional regulation. Jessica and Dr. Kessler discuss intergenerational trauma, nervous system regulation, neurodiversity, emotional attunement, parenting dynamics, and the ways children unconsciously shapeshift in order to feel safe, accepted, and loved. They also explore the importance of helping parents understand their own emotional triggers and attachment patterns so they can stop passing unresolved wounds onto future generations. Dr. Kessler shares how behavior is often the final expression of deeper unmet needs, regulation struggles, or sensory and emotional mismatches within the family system, and why compassion and curiosity are more effective than shame or punishment. The conversation also dives into the experience of growing up feeling “different,” how social systems often create internalized shame around learning differences and self-expression, and how children develop protective personas to survive emotionally unsafe environments. Together, Jessica and Dr. Kessler unpack the connection between the Traitor Within, false identities, emotional masking, and the lifelong process of learning how to safely become yourself again. About Dr. Debra Kessler: Dr. Debra Kessler is a licensed clinical psychologist and child neurodiversity specialist with more than 20 years of experience helping families move from confusion and frustration to connection and confidence. With a background in pediatric nursing, pediatrics, and clinical psychology, she provides a holistic approach to understanding children’s unique neurological, emotional, and developmental profiles while helping parents build healthier, more attuned family systems. Connect with Dr. Debra Kessler: Instagram: @dr.dtkessler Substack: @drdebrakessler LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/debrakessler-psychologist/ Email: drdebrakessler@gmail.com Listen to Your Traitor Within: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/your-traitor-within/id1797804404 Support the show
May 20 · 1 hr 5 min
Your Traitor Within: I Love You My Narcissist with Ali & Stefanie Schmahl
In this episode of Your Traitor Within, Jessica Anne Pressler sits down with filmmaker Ali Schmahl and actress/producer Stefanie Schmahl to discuss their psychological drama I Love You My Narcissist, a film exploring the devastating emotional impact of narcissistic relationships and the patterns that keep people trapped inside them. Through fictional storytelling grounded in real psychological dynamics, the film follows two survivors navigating manipulation, trauma bonding, emotional confusion, and the long process of reclaiming themselves. Jessica, Ali, and Stefanie discuss the importance of bringing narcissistic abuse “out of the darkness,” how film can help people recognize patterns they may not yet have language for, and why emotionally immersive storytelling can sometimes educate more powerfully than direct instruction. The conversation also explores narcissistic family systems, emotional conditioning, self-abandonment, and the role of the Traitor Within in keeping survivors stuck in painful cycles. About Ali Schmahl: Ali Schmahl is a Berlin-based filmmaker, director, writer, and producer known for socially conscious and character-driven films. His work has screened at more than 80 international film festivals and received over 45 awards. His debut documentary Privileg explored gender identity and the challenges faced by the transgender community, and his latest feature I Love You My Narcissist combines psychological depth with cinematic storytelling to examine narcissistic abuse and its impact on survivors. About Stefanie Schmahl: Stefanie Schmahl studied acting at the renowned William Esper Studio in New York City before returning to Germany to pursue work as an actor and producer. Her short film Anniversary screened at over 20 film festivals and earned multiple awards, including six Best Actress honors. Through I Love You My Narcissist, she continues exploring emotionally complex storytelling centered around trauma, relationships, and healing. Where to Find Them: Instagram: @ilymn.film Watch I Love You My Narcissist: Use Jessica Anne Pressler’s exclusive link below for 15% off streaming access to the film: https://stream.alefcinestream.com/buy/i-love-you-my-narcissist?code=jessicap1 Listen to Your Traitor Within: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/your-traitor-within/id1797804404 Support the show
May 14 · 1 hr
Your Traitor Within: From Delusional to Discerning
In this episode of Your Traitor Within, Jessica Anne Pressler sits down with Erika Fracassa, creator of Delusional to Discerning, to explore the confusion, cognitive dissonance, and emotional chaos that often exist inside narcissistic relationships. After spending 15 years in a relationship that left her questioning her own reality, Erika now helps others reconnect with their intuition and rebuild self-trust through education, pattern recognition, and radical honesty. Together, Jessica and Erika discuss trauma bonds, narcissistic supply, gaslighting, self-abandonment, and the role of the Traitor Within in keeping people stuck in unhealthy dynamics. They also explore the grief that comes with radical acceptance, why healing is not linear, and how rebuilding self-trust becomes the foundation for lasting change. This conversation is deeply personal, educational, and validating for anyone who has ever felt confused inside a relationship that slowly disconnected them from themselves. About Erika Fracassa: Erika Fracassa is the creator of Delusional to Discerning, a platform dedicated to helping people make sense of confusing relationship dynamics and reconnect with their own clarity. Through her content, coaching, and growing online community, Erika helps others move from confusion to discernment by breaking down patterns people can finally recognize and trust. Where to Find Erika Fracassa: Instagram: @delusionaltodiscerning Support the show
May 6 · 51 min
Your Traitor Within: Amy Watkins LPC has a Scapegoat Reset
In this episode of Your Traitor Within, Jessica Anne Pressler sits down with therapist, speaker, and author Amy Watkins to explore how childhood conditioning shapes the way we move through relationships, identity, and self-worth. Amy shares her deeply personal story of growing up in a high-control religious environment, surviving sexual abuse, and learning how the coping mechanisms that once kept her safe became the “Traitor Within” patterns that followed her into adulthood. Together, Jessica and Amy discuss trauma bonding, people-pleasing, religious shame, dissociation, narcissistic family systems, and the painful but transformative process of finally choosing yourself. They also explore what healing actually feels like—not just intellectually understanding your patterns, but experiencing safety in the body for the first time. About Amy Watkins:Amy Watkins, LPC, is a therapist, speaker, and author helping people uncover childhood patterns, break toxic cycles, and reconnect with their authentic selves. Her upcoming memoir Performing Normal is set for release in August. She is also the creator of the Scapegoat Reset coaching program. Where to Find Amy Watkins:Instagram: @gods.favorite.problemWebsite: https://scapegoatreset.com/ Support the show
April 30 · 35 min
Your Traitor Within: Unlocking Radiant Self-Worth with Victoria Lynn PonTell
In this episode of Your Traitor Within, Jessica Anne Pressler sits down with Victoria Lynn PonTell, speaker, mentor, and creator of the 7 Keys to Unlocking Your Radiant Beauty. Together, they explore the concept of the Traitor Within and how patterns like self-doubt, perfectionism, people-pleasing, and inner criticism keep women disconnected from their true selves. Victoria shares her personal journey of overcoming these patterns and how she now helps others reclaim their confidence and self-worth. This conversation focuses on emotional resilience, mindset shifts, and the process of moving from self-betrayal to self-trust—highlighting how true transformation begins when you stop abandoning yourself and start choosing your own truth. About Victoria Lynn PonTell: Victoria Lynn PonTell is a speaker, mentor, and creator of the 7 Keys to Unlocking Your Radiant Beauty. Her work focuses on helping women overcome self-sabotage, build confidence, and reconnect with their authentic sense of self through practical tools and mindset transformation. The Book: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0F22MSQBN YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pyuRk0BMf-A Website: https://victorialynnpontell.com LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/victorialynnpontell-3a9400376/ Instagram: @victorialynnpontell Support the show
April 23 · 1 hr 26 min
Your Traitor Within: Rewiring Trauma Bonds with Carissa Brockman
In this episode of Your Traitor Within, Jessica Anne Pressler sits down with Carissa Brockman, Canadian Certified Counsellor and trauma-trained somatic therapist, to explore the deeper psychological and nervous system patterns behind trauma bonds and narcissistic relationships. Carissa shares her personal story of being in an abusive relationship while studying to become a therapist, and how cognitive dissonance, early belief systems, and the nervous system keep people stuck even when they “know” something is wrong. Together, they unpack how the Traitor Within forms, why survivors stay, and why leaving is only the beginning of the healing process. The conversation also dives into attraction patterns, self-abandonment, and how to rebuild a sense of self, safety, and identity after abuse. About Carissa Brockman: Carissa Brockman is a Canadian Certified Counsellor, trauma-trained somatic therapist, and specialist in narcissistic abuse recovery and complex PTSD. Her work is deeply informed by her own lived experience, and she now helps others reclaim their reality and rewire their nervous systems for healthy love. Where to Find Carissa Brockman: Website: www.carissabrockman.com Instagram / TikTok / YouTube: @soulfully_embodied Masterclass Bundle: https://carissa-brockman-0276.mykajabi.com/masterclass-bundle Support the show
April 16 · 53 min
Your Traitor Within: Stronger Than Before
In this episode of Your Traitor Within, Jessica Anne Pressler sits down with Lisa Sonni, relationship coach and expert in trauma bond recovery, to explore why people stay in abusive dynamics and how those patterns form. They discuss trauma bonds, cognitive dissonance, and emotional entrapment, and how these connect to the Traitor Within—the internal pattern that overrides intuition and keeps you stuck. Lisa shares her Break & Rebuild Method and offers insight into how survivors can begin to reclaim their identity, self-worth, and clarity. About Lisa Sonni: Lisa Sonni is an internationally recognized relationship coach, author, and leading expert in trauma bond recovery. She has helped thousands of survivors break free from abusive patterns and rebuild their lives, and has built a community of over 1.6 million followers. Where to Find Lisa Sonni: TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@lisasonni Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lisasonnicoaching Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/LisaSonniStrongerThanBefore Support the show
April 9 · 50 min
Your Traitor Within: 1 Percent Philosophy
In this powerful episode of Your Traitor Within, Jessica Anne Pressler sits down with Dr. John A. King—survivor, author, and advocate—to explore the long-term impact of childhood trauma and the patterns we develop to survive it. Dr. King shares his deeply personal story of early abuse, memory fragmentation, and the moment his past resurfaced later in life. He speaks openly about how survival mechanisms—like emotional suppression, masking, and hyper-awareness—helped him endure trauma, but later became barriers to healing. Together, they unpack how these protective strategies evolve into what Jessica calls the Traitor Within—the part of us that once kept us safe, but eventually begins to limit growth, connection, and self-understanding. The conversation also explores masculinity, silence, and why so many men struggle to speak about trauma, along with the importance of safe relationships, support systems, and incremental change in the healing process. Dr. King introduces his 1% philosophy—small, consistent steps toward change—and reminds listeners that healing is not immediate, but possible. This episode is a raw and honest look at trauma, resilience, and what it means to rebuild a life from the inside out. 🌐 Website: https://drjohnaking.com/ 📱 Instagram & Socials: @drjohnaking Support the show
April 2 · 53 min
Your Traitor Within: Healing the Shame You Learned in Childhood
In this episode of Your Traitor Within, Jessica Anne Pressler sits down with psychotherapist and author Kristine Jensen to explore how childhood shame shapes the way we see ourselves—and the patterns we repeat in adulthood. Kristine shares how early experiences of emotional neglect and feeling “not enough” can quietly turn into self-doubt, perfectionism, and a harsh inner critic. Together, they connect this to the Traitor Within—the part of us that once protected us, but now keeps us stuck in cycles of pressure, overperformance, and self-attack. They discuss why these patterns are often misunderstood as personality flaws instead of learned survival responses, and how healing begins with awareness, self-compassion, and learning to meet yourself differently. This conversation is a powerful reminder: you may have been shaped by your past—but you are not defined by it. About Kristine Jensen: Kristine Jensen is a licensed psychotherapist, speaker, and author of Bruised Not Broken. Her work focuses on helping people understand the hidden roots of self-doubt and heal the shame formed through emotional neglect and early experiences. 🌐 https://kristine-jensen.com/ Key Takeaway: What feels like a personal flaw is often something you learned to survive—and once you see it, you can begin to change it. Support the show

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