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UNDERSTANDABLE · Friday · 17 min

How to Become So Unbothered They Start Chasing You

► Build secure relationships without losing yourself: https://understandable.net (ad) Welcome to today's episode! In this video, I unfold the psychology of why some people stay so unbothered in dating while others, like me a few years ago, end up overly sensitive, needy and obsessing over someone they barely know. As a recovered avoidant, I share the story of a girl I chased in university, and why you attract and cling to detached people, often from a childhood wound and the hope that keeps you self-abandoning. Then I show how to swap that psychology, not by playing games, but by breaking out of your box, building other life areas and a purpose bigger than the relationship, and finally learning to set boundaries. You become genuinely unbothered, not cold. ► Subscribe On Your Favorite Platform! YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGiJdF0yeTyRJanW_uSICDw?sub_confirmation=1 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/2gaheQLxBwByM9txVzlpI6 Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/understandable/id1399616905 Amazon Music: https://music.amazon.de/podcasts/ee3580cb-61c5-4aa1-9ad4-1204014078e7/understandable ► Episode Timestamps: 00:00 Introduction 01:36 The Girl Who Was Unbothered 04:14 Why You Chase the Detached Ones 06:21 Swap the Psychology 10:11 1: Allow Yourself to Break the Box 12:03 2: Build Other Life Areas 14:29 3: Find a Purpose Bigger Than the Relationship 15:20 4: Learn to Set Boundaries ► Reach Out To Me :) E-Mail: info@understandable.net ► Hi, my name is Robert! I make videos about how to build stable, secure relationships without losing yourself or waiting forever for the “perfect” partner. :) ► Disclaimer: None of the contents are therapeutic or medical recommendations. The contents are not to be understood as therapeutic-medical instructions and are neither intended as professional health advice nor as education. I am not a health professional myself. My content is based on research and my personal experiences working with various therapists as a client for three years.

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► Build secure relationships without losing yourself: https://understandable.net (ad)


Welcome to today's episode! In this video, I unfold the psychology of why some people stay so unbothered in dating while others, like me a few years ago, end up overly sensitive, needy and obsessing over someone they barely know. As a recovered avoidant, I share the story of a girl I chased in university, and why you attract and cling to detached people, often from a childhood wound and the hope that keeps you self-abandoning. Then I show how to swap that psychology, not by playing games, but by breaking out of your box, building other life areas and a purpose bigger than the relationship, and finally learning to set boundaries. You become genuinely unbothered, not cold.


► Subscribe On Your Favorite Platform!

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGiJdF0yeTyRJanW_uSICDw?sub_confirmation=1

Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/2gaheQLxBwByM9txVzlpI6

Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/understandable/id1399616905

Amazon Music: https://music.amazon.de/podcasts/ee3580cb-61c5-4aa1-9ad4-1204014078e7/understandable


► Episode Timestamps:

00:00 Introduction

01:36 The Girl Who Was Unbothered

04:14 Why You Chase the Detached Ones

06:21 Swap the Psychology

10:11 1: Allow Yourself to Break the Box

12:03 2: Build Other Life Areas

14:29 3: Find a Purpose Bigger Than the Relationship

15:20 4: Learn to Set Boundaries


► Reach Out To Me :)

E-Mail: info@understandable.net


► Hi, my name is Robert! I make videos about how to build stable, secure relationships without losing yourself or waiting forever for the “perfect” partner. :)


► Disclaimer: None of the contents are therapeutic or medical recommendations. The contents are not to be understood as therapeutic-medical instructions and are neither intended as professional health advice nor as education.

I am not a health professional myself. My content is based on research and my personal experiences working with various therapists as a client for three years.

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