Skip to content
Artwork for This Is Not What I Was Expecting
Kids & FamilyParentingSociety & CultureRelationshipsPersonal Journals

This Is Not What I Was Expecting

Parent Alliance

If you've ever looked around at other parents and wondered, "How is everyone else making this look easy?" you're in the right place.
We're a group of (mostly) moms who get together every other week to talk honestly about what parenting is really like. Not the polished version. The real version.
Maybe you're trying to figure out bedtime, screen time, homework, sibling conflicts, or how your child can somehow be starving and refuse every food in the house at the same time. Maybe you're carrying the endless mental load of parenting, the forms, the calendars, the school emails, the appointments, and all the things you're afraid you'll forget.
And maybe on top of all that, you're parenting a kiddo with behavioral challenges, anxiety, or other needs that people don't always understand. Which means you're not just parenting, you're also keeping track of medication refills, IEP meetings, therapy appointments, insurance headaches, and everything else that comes with advocating for your child.
That's why we're here.
We share our stories, what we've learned, what we're still learning, and the things other parents don't always talk about out loud. We laugh together, vent about broken systems, celebrate the smallest victories, and remind each other that we're not alone.
Because parenting isn't always what we expected. And sometimes the most powerful thing you can hear is, "Me too."
So pull up a chair. You're among people who get it. You belong here.

Play
  • 20 episodes
  • fortnightly
  • Avg 35 min
  • English
  • #113
    Thursday · 27 min

    Taking Phones Away at School Sounds Great… Until Your Kid Needs You

    We spend half our time telling our kids to get off their phones. Now schools want to take them away, and suddenly we're not so sure! This week, we're talking about school cell phone bans, the worry of not being able to reach our kids, and whether we're all a little too connected. As usual, we've got different opinions, a few laughs, and no easy answers!

  • #107
    October 22 · 51 min

    Living With Adult Kids: Boundaries, Money, and Letting Go

    When adult children still live at home - or move back home - parents often find themselves navigating a whole new set of challenges. This week we share honest stories about boundaries, money, chores, relationships, and the ongoing balance between offering support and encouraging independence. If you're trying to figure out what parenting looks like after 18, you're not alone.

  • #109
    October 11 · 43 min

    The Friendships you Lose and the One You Find

    This week we're talking about how friendships change through the different seasons of parenting. From busy schedules and growing families to friendships that fade and the unexpected ways we find connection again, we're sharing our own experiences and reminding each other that we're not alone in figuring it all out.

  • #112
    September 24 · 37 min

    When to Step Back and Let Your Teen Figure It Out

    As our kids get older, knowing when to help and when to step back can be one of the hardest parts of parenting. In this episode, we talk about giving teens opportunities to make decisions, experience safe failures, build responsibility, and practice the everyday skills they’ll need as adults - while we learn to let them figure things out.

  • #111
    September 3 · 34 min

    When Your Kid Is Melting Down and You’re About to Lose It Too

    When your kid is melting down and you’re already hanging on by a thread, what do you do? This week, we’re talking honestly about kids’ meltdowns, losing our own patience, and the very real ways we get everyone - including ourselves - through the hard moments (even if that means hiding in the car with a Diet Coke).

  • #110
    August 20 · 31 min

    How To Speak Up For Your Child Without Feeling Like That Parent

    Speaking up for your child sounds easy - until you’re worried about being annoying, confrontational, or labeled “that parent.” In this episode, we talk about why advocating for our kids can feel so uncomfortable, the times we’ve stayed quiet and regretted it, and what we’ve learned about finding our voice when our kids need us. No perfect scripts - just real talk about getting more comfortable speaking up.

  • #108
    July 9 · 49 min

    What's for Dinner? Why This One Question Feels So Overwhelming

    If you've ever asked, "What's for dinner?" only to hear everyone answer, "I don't know," you're not alone. This week, we're talking about the mental load of feeding a family, from meal planning and grocery budgets to picky eaters, sensory needs, and the everyday reality of getting food on the table. Join us for an honest conversation filled with practical ideas, plenty of validation, and the reminder that feeding your family doesn't have to be perfect to be enough.

  • #106
    June 4 · 47 min

    The Parenting Badges We Wish Existed

    If parenting came with merit badges, what would yours be? Inspired by a conversation about adulting badges, we're sharing the parenting badges we've earned the hard way — from surviving failed family outings and mountains of laundry to making it through summer break one day at a time. Join us for a funny, honest conversation about the moments every parent recognizes, the lessons you can only learn by living through them, and why sometimes just making it to bedtime deserves a badge of its own.

  • #105
    May 21 · 28 min

    When Your Family Doesn't Understand Your Child's Struggles

    Parents often expect support from family — but when your child struggles in ways other people don’t understand, that support isn’t always there. In this episode, we talk about finding connection, validation, and real-life help from the people who truly show up, even when they aren’t family.

  • #104
    May 7 · 49 min

    Your Child Was Excluded by Another Parent… Now What?

    When another parent decides your child isn’t someone their kid should be around, it can leave you confused, frustrated, and unsure how to help. This week we’re talking about what happens when kids get excluded because of adult decisions, including when that exclusion is due to behavior, ADHD, autism, or social differences. We share real experiences and talk through how we support our kids when we can’t control the situation, can’t get answers, and can’t fix it for them.

  • #103
    April 23 · 41 min

    What If Your Kids Don't Remember The Things You Feel Guilty About?

    If you’re feeling overwhelmed by busy schedules, picky eaters, and the constant pressure to do it all, this episode is a reminder you’re not alone. We talk honestly about mom guilt—and why the moments you worry about most might not be what your kids remember at all.

  • #101
    March 26 · 32 min

    The High Cost of Being a Good Parent Right Now

    Everything feels more expensive right now, and parents are the ones carrying the stress of trying to make it all work. Groceries cost more. Gas costs more. Housing costs more. Even the little things add up fast. And when you’re raising kids, especially kids who need extra support, that pressure does not stay on the budget spreadsheet. It shows up in the guilt, the exhaustion, the second-guessing, and the constant feeling that no matter how hard you work, it is still not enough. Today's convers

  • #100
    March 14 · 33 min

    When Your Life Is a Dumpster Fire But You Still Have to Be a Mom

    Some days it feels like your life is a dumpster fire. Other days it feels like the whole world is. Either way, parenting doesn't stop. This week we're talking about what it's like to keep functioning when everything feels overwhelming - whether it's chaos in your own family, stress from the news cycle, or a child who is struggling in ways other people can't see. Because the truth is, the school emails still come. Dinner still has to happen and work still expects your to show up with a smile. We

  • #99
    February 26 · 11 min

    Why is parenting my teen harder than I expected?

    This week is a shorter conversation — because sometimes that’s all we have the bandwidth for. We were told parenting would get easier when our kids got older. We believed it. And then… they got older. The double stroller stress turns into adult-problem stress. The toddler chaos turns into late-night phone anxiety. The mental load doesn’t disappear — it just changes. If you’ve ever thought, Shouldn’t this feel easier by now? you are not alone. The stress shifting doesn’t mean you’re doing it wron

  • #98
    February 12 · 28 min

    The IEP Says They’re Fine — But Real Life Is Telling a Different Story

    This week we’re talking about what happens when the IEP says everything is going well — but real life tells a different story. Grades are passing. Goals are met. On paper, things look fine. And yet many parents still feel uneasy, especially as their kids get closer to transition age. We talk honestly about the disconnect between school success and real-world readiness, and the shock that can come when you realize the system is focused on this school year while parents are thinking about adulthoo

  • #97
    January 29 · 36 min

    When Everyone's Needs Are Urgent and Yours Are Always Last

    When you’re parenting, it can feel like everyone’s needs are urgent — kids, appointments, school calls, medications, work — and somehow your own stuff always ends up last on the list. This week Melissa, Tracy, and Perl talk about the invisible load parents carry when they’re managing multiple children’s needs and their own. From living at the pharmacy, to juggling appointments, to teaching kids time management when you’re barely keeping your head above water, this is a conversation about what it

  • #96
    January 15 · 29 min

    Extended School Year: What Parents Should Be Thinking About Now

    If your child has an IEP, Extended School Year (ESY) might already be on your radar — or coming soon. This week we break down what ESY is meant to do, how schools make decisions, and how parents can push back when a “canned program” doesn’t fit. We also talk honestly about work schedules, transportation, mental health, and when saying no is the right choice.

  • #95
    Dec 31, 2025 · 30 min

    Parenting Is Problem-Solving Until You’re Allowed to Sleep

    Some days parenting feels like fixing one thing after another until you finally get to go to bed. Homework, food, school stuff, schedules, money, feelings — you solve what’s in front of you, then something else pops up. None of it feels dramatic on its own. It’s just constant. And that’s why it’s so exhausting. This is a conversation about the nonstop figuring-it-out parents do every day, the creativity it takes just to keep things moving, and why it makes sense that you’re tired even when not

  • #94
    Dec 18, 2025 · 36 min

    Grab a Pen. We're Taking a Break

    This week, we’re inviting you to take a break with us. No advice, no fixing, no agenda — just a few parents sitting together, coloring, chatting, and letting our brains rest for a bit. We start by watching a short art video together (we’ll tell you where to find it), then we grab whatever pens or markers are nearby and settle in. You can draw along, listen while you fold laundry, or just let this play in the background while you breathe. Parenting can be heavy. This episode is your permission to

Showing 1–20 of 20 episodes