The Stay or Go Podcast for Women Considering Divorce

Attachment Theory & It's Hidden Impacts on Your Marriage

Mar 26, 2024 · 1 hr · 43.7 MB

0:00-1:00:36

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Episode 12: Hey loves! I’ve been on a sacred retreat of the soul for the past month and a half, reconnecting, holding space for my own healing. I’ve been learning to live more soul-led, and trust me, this is the foreshadowing for what’s coming next here on the podcast. Creative flow, not forced content—that’s the new rhythm. But I’ve also been fired up to share something juicy with you…

What’s Inside This Episode:

Why Attachment Theory Matters
I read Attached by Amir Levine & Rachel Heller a few years ago, and it blew my mind. It’s that energy—not just about marriage, but all your relationships. 🧩❤️
Attachment Styles 101
Three types you'll learn to spot in yourself and your partner:
- Anxious (“I live with a sixth sense of danger.”)
- Avoidant (“I keep love at arm’s length.”)
- Secure (“I get comfortably close.”)
  I’ll guide you in seeing your style—and your spouse’s—with clarity and compassion.
Why It All Feels So Hard
I share deeply raw moments from my past—growing up with a narcissistic parent, living in hyper-vigilance, always scanning for emotional cues. It shaped everything. Trust issues, self-doubt, chronic self-consciousness—yes, that was me.
Protest Behaviors vs Deactivating Strategies
You’ll see why your fight or flight reactions (protesting, pushing for connection) may trigger your partner’s retreat, and vice versa. Emotional ping-pong at its finest—but once you see it, you can heal it.
The Beauty of Secure Pairing
Here’s the gorgeous truth: you can shift attachment styles. Secure relationships can rewire your nervous system. I’ve lived it through dating—but I’m giving you the inside view of how soul-healing can truly begin with the right partner.
My Dating Journey in Attachment Styles
Real talk: I’ve dated avoidants and transitioned into avoidant myself. Then I dated someone more anxiously attached—only to become avoidant again. It’s been wild—but illuminating.
In 2023, the universe aligned and… you'll have to stay tuned to hear about the most secure connection of all. Trust me, it’s next-level magic and worth the wait. 💫