The Dad Edge Podcast

What to Do When Your Teen Is Struggling Mentally

This week's Wednesday Q&A is a little different, I'm running it solo since my usual co-host Joe couldn't make it, and honestly, it turned into one of the harder, more important conversations we've had. A man in our Alliance named Rich called in with a genuinely difficult situation: his 17-year-old stepdaughter recently went through a breakup, was hospitalized shortly after making statements about wanting to end her life, and Rich is trying to figure out how to support her while also being honest that he's not sure whether what he's seeing is a real crisis or a manipulation tactic she's learned to use. I want to be upfront that I am not a licensed therapist, and neither is anyone else on this call. We have someone in our community who specializes in this exact area, and when a situation is acute, that's who we point men toward. What I can offer is real, lived experience, because one of my own boys went through a genuinely frightening season with depression and anxiety years ago, and I've been in the position of feeling completely out of my depth as a father. If you're a father watching a child struggle right now and feeling like you have no idea what you're doing, or you're not even sure if what you're seeing is a real crisis, this conversation won't give you all the answers, because there often aren't easy ones. But it might help you feel less alone in it. Timeline Summary [1:02] Opening the Wednesday Q&A solo, and introducing today's difficult topic [1:48] Introducing Rich, a leader in the Alliance's teen-parenting group, and his situation [3:13] Rich shares that his 17-year-old bonus daughter has recently expressed suicidal thoughts [4:33] Understanding the timeline: a difficult personal season followed by a breakup two weeks ago [5:43] Larry announces Roommates to Soulmates cohort three, starting September 16th [7:25] Larry's disclaimer: not a licensed therapist, and where the community sends acute cases [8:37] Asking Rich what he'd want to see in his stepdaughter's life a few months from now [9:49] The tension between wanting to support her and wanting to hold her accountable to her own goals [10:47] Assessing her circle of friends and the instability there [12:30] First piece of advice: don't go through this alone, and find a therapist she connects with [13:20] The breakfast and games advice from a mentor, and why simple connection mattered more than conversation [15:27] The medication journey: an initial diagnosis, a worsening condition, and a specialized brain scan clinic [17:07] How a corrected diagnosis and a supplement-based approach turned things around over about a year [17:32] Larry shares his own 2017 hospitalization following extreme physical training and severe insomnia [19:29] Reiterating connection over correction as the throughline of the advice [19:51] Larry announces a rare, small-group preview of the Dad Edge Business Boardroom Brotherhood [24:19] Closing advice: don't go through it alone, connect first, and remember that without connection there is no influence Five Key Takeaways You don't have to be a mental health expert to support a struggling child, but you do have to know when to bring in someone who is. Recognizing the limits of your own expertise and connecting your family with the right specialist is itself an act of good fathering. Connection has to come before correction. A struggling teenager often needs low-pressure time with a parent, free of goal-setting or serious conversation, far more than another conversation about fixing the problem. Finding the right therapist matters as much as finding a therapist at all. A mismatch in chemistry or approach can make a child more resistant to help they genuinely need. A diagnosis can be wrong, and it's worth getting a second opinion when treatment isn't working. A corrected diagnosis and a different treatment approach turned around a genuinely difficult, months-long decline. You are not required to be blood related to be the father figure a child needs most. Consistent presence during a hard season is what a child remembers and trusts long after the season ends. Links & Resources Get the full show notes and every link from this episode: https://thedadedge.com/1525 Ready to stop feeling like roommates and start leading your marriage? Join the next Roommates to Soulmates cohort: https://thedadedge.com/soulmates Know a dad with a story worth sharing, or want to be on the show yourself? Apply to be a guest: https://thedadedge.com/guest Closing If you're a father in the middle of a season like the one Rich is walking through right now, please hear this: you don't have to have it figured out, and you don't have to do it alone. Get connected with people who know more than you do, keep showing up for the small, ordinary moments of connection, and trust that the fruit of your presence will show up even if you can't see it yet. Without connection, we have no influence, so lead with connection first, every time. Go out and live legendary. If you or someone you know is struggling with thoughts of suicide, the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline is available 24/7 by calling or texting 988.

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The Unspoken Expectations Quietly Wrecking Your Marriage featuring Jessica & Larry Hagner

Gentlemen, welcome to the fourth and final episode of this month's series with my wife Jessica, and I want to start by saying thank you for showing up for this one, since August actually had five Fridays this year, which means she recorded a full bonus episode she didn't have to do. Today we're tackling something that trips up more marriages than almost anything else: roles and expectations, and specifically, all the unspoken assumptions about who does what that quietly cause resentment when they're never actually talked about. Jessica and I get into the finances first, how I took over bill paying for our first five years of marriage and, driven by my own anxiety around debt, paid things down so aggressively it actually put us in a bind more than once. We talk through why swapping our roles, me handling investing and her handling the day to day bills, ended up being the right fit for both of us, and why neither of us wants to trade back. From there we get into dinner, probably the single area that's caused us the most quiet frustration over the years, from Jessica's years of resentment doing all the cooking to the practical shift we finally made once we actually talked about it out loud instead of just enduring it. We also open up about how we split the harder parenting conversations, why the sex talk with our boys has always fallen to me, and why Jessica has become the one I lean on for basically every other hard conversation in our house. I share what I've learned watching her approach conflict, calm, strategic, and incredibly well timed, compared to my own instinct to just react in the moment. We close out by talking through how we split up kids' sports and activities, and what boundaries actually held up over 22 years of marriage. If your marriage has ever hit friction over who's supposed to be doing what, and you've never actually sat down and talked about it, this conversation is a real look at how two people figured that out over two decades together, including the parts that took way too long to fix. Timeline Summary [1:02] Introducing the fourth and final episode of the August series with Jessica [12:56] Reflecting on last week's lower-energy episode and setting up today's topic: roles and expectations [14:12] Larry announces Roommates to Soulmates cohort three, starting September 16th [16:33] Why unspoken and unknown expectations are what actually trip couples up the most [19:00] The early years of bill paying: Larry's aggressive debt payoff and the strain it caused [21:52] Why paying bills stressed Larry out so deeply, no matter how much money was in the bank [24:36] Checking in on whether Jessica still feels good about handling the bills 17 years later [25:39] Introducing the second financial role: why Larry handles all the investing [27:05] Larry's own journey from investing overwhelm to genuinely loving it today [30:45] Confirming neither of them wants to trade financial roles, and why that alignment matters [31:27] Introducing the dinner problem: why family meals can become a major source of strife [32:52] The moment, about a year ago, Jessica finally said out loud that she hated cooking [33:32] The fix: splitting cooking nights and having the non-cooking spouse handle cleanup [37:55] Larry announces the first-ever Dad Edge Day with the Arizona Cardinals, November 15th [42:22] Checking in on what Jessica would still change about how dinner works today [43:24] Jessica's regret: never requiring the kids to eat what was served instead of making separate meals [46:34] Why the sex talk role has always fallen to Larry, and how he approaches it with their boys [52:36] Breaking down Jessica's calm, strategic approach to conflict versus Larry's reactive instinct [57:14] A callback to an earlier, lighter moment in the series about Larry's past drinking [1:00:49] How they split kids' sports and activities, and the assumptions each of them still carries [1:03:22] What comes next: Jessica joining monthly, and how to submit topic ideas [1:04:51] Introducing two free resources: 25 Intimate Conversation Starters and 21 Days to an Extraordinary Marriage Five Key Takeaways Roles that feel natural today were often built through real trial and error, not instinct. Larry and Jessica swapped financial responsibilities after outside mentors pointed out they'd assigned them backward, and it took years to get right. Resentment builds fastest around unspoken expectations. Nearly every friction point in their marriage, from bills to dinner, traces back to one person assuming a role the other person quietly grew to dread. Sometimes the fix is simple once you finally say the hard thing out loud. Jessica's years of resentment around cooking dissolved almost immediately once she told Larry directly that she hated it, leading to a workable rotation within one conversation. Timing matters as much as the message when addressing conflict. Jessica's approach of waiting for a calm moment, rather than confronting an issue in the heat of frustration, consistently produces a better outcome than reacting immediately. Roles don't have to be permanent or symmetrical to work. Twenty-two years in, the goal isn't a perfectly even split of every responsibility, it's each person operating in the role that actually fits them, while staying willing to revisit it when it's not working. Links & Resources Shownotes for this episode: http://thedadedge.com/1524 Roommates to Soulmates (Larry's 8-week marriage coaching cohort; next cohort starts September 16th, with free preview calls): http://thedadedge.com/soulmates The Dad Edge Day at State Farm Stadium (Arizona Cardinals vs. Los Angeles Rams, November 15): https://thedadedge.com/nfl Closing Wrapping up this series, what stands out most is that Jessica and I don't have this figured out because we never struggled, we have it figured out because we finally stopped avoiding the hard conversations about who does what and why. Every role we've settled into came from a real conversation, sometimes an overdue one, not from assuming the other person would just handle it or just deal with it forever. If something in your own marriage has quietly been building resentment because nobody's actually said it out loud, let this be the nudge to finally have that conversation. Go out and live legendary.

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Loneliness Is a Crisis and the Answer is Community featuring Don Ross

Don Ross is the founder of Manhood Tribes, a former pastor of 20 years who now works in digital marketing and has spent over two decades helping men cut through the noise around masculinity and build real brotherhood. Married 22 years with two boys, he's built his work around five marks of manhood and, more recently, helping men prepare for what he believes are the biblical end times. This is a unique episode. Don walks Larry through the specific signs he sees converging right now, the nation of Israel and the temple, the move toward digital currency, and the gospel reaching every ethnic group, then pivots to what actually matters for the average man: building community, growing real-world skills, and developing a genuine relationship with Jesus rather than just checking religious boxes. If you've felt the anxiety of scrolling the news and wondered how to lead your family through uncertain times, this conversation offers a grounded, faith-centered answer. Timeline Summary [3:29] – How close are we to the end times, and what that phrase actually means [5:28] – Why the anxiety men feel scrolling their phones connects to the bigger picture [7:33] – The specific signs happening now that are unique in human history [9:05] – Introducing Don Ross, Manhood Tribes, and the epidemic of male loneliness [12:35] – The Euphrates River drying up as a minor sign [13:29] – Israel reestablished as a nation in 1948 and the Ezekiel dry bones prophecy [15:10] – The Temple Institute, the red heifer, and preparations for a third temple [20:41] – Why the dome of the Rock and secular Israeli politics have stalled the temple [25:05] – Global commerce, the mark of the beast, and central bank digital currencies [29:23] – How state-controlled currency mirrors China's social credit system [32:29] – The third and more hopeful sign: the gospel reaching every ethnic group by 2033 [35:27] – Why the decline of masculinity collides with this moment in history [37:13] – Larry on feeling spiritually ready but not practically prepared [44:05] – What Covid revealed about government control, framed carefully as speculation [48:39] – Why building a bunker is the wrong first step [50:34] – The five marks of manhood: strength, courage, skill, honor, and allegiance [51:34] – Monthly challenges, from cold showers to learning vehicle maintenance [54:20] – The spiritual anchor and connecting relationally to Jesus [56:56] – Knowing Jesus as a person, not just checking the church and Bible boxes [1:03:44] – Larry's hike through Garden of the Gods and the decision that brought him peace 5 Key Takeaways Watch the Season, Not the Date — The instruction was never to predict the day, but to recognize the season and be ready. Don points to several signs converging at once as reason to pay attention rather than panic. Loneliness Is a Crisis, and Community Is the Answer — Most men believe they have to figure life out alone, and the isolation is at an all time high. Real brotherhood is what helps men survive hardship and become better husbands and fathers. Don't Build a Bunker, Build a Community — The prepper instinct is individualistic, but the biblical model is to love your neighbor as yourself. The right next step is building strong community that can support each other through any storm. Grow Real Skills as a Man — Strength, courage, skill, honor, and allegiance are traits you develop over a lifetime. Practical challenges like cold showers or basic vehicle maintenance build the grit and capability most modern men have lost. Know Jesus as a Person — Faith isn't just going to church, reading the Bible, and praying as a checklist. It's a relationship built through conversation, listening, and shared experience, the same way you'd cultivate connection with a spouse. Links & Resources Episode page and all links: https://thedadedge.com/1523 Manhood Tribes on YouTube: https://youtube.com/@ManhoodTribes Roommates to Soulmates (cohort 3, starts September 16, free preview calls September 8 and 9): https://thedadedge.com/soulmates Dad Edge Day with the Arizona Cardinals (November 15, Cardinals vs Rams, State Farm Stadium): https://thedadedge.com/nfl The Pursuit of Legendary Fatherhood by Larry Hagner: https://thedadedge.com Enjoyed This Episode? If Don's challenge to be informed, prepared, and faithful struck a chord, take one small step this week. Learn a practical skill you've been avoiding, or spend ten quiet minutes listening in prayer instead of just talking. If the show keeps delivering, follow, rate, and leave a review so more fathers can find these conversations.

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The One Word That Quietly Makes or Breaks a Marriage featuring Jessica & Larry Hagner

Larry is back in studio with his wife Jessica for the fourth installment of their couples series, recorded the same month they hit 23 years of marriage and 30 years of knowing each other. This time the whole conversation centers on one word that quietly makes or breaks a marriage: alignment. Most couples, Larry notes from a decade of coaching, are misaligned on parenting, money, intimacy, and faith, and never realize it until it derails their connection. Larry and Jessica walk through how they actually got aligned over 22 years, from choosing experiences over stuff and a backyard over a sports car, to spending on healthy food and shared workouts, to raising kids who value connection over possessions. They're honest that it came through constant, daily communication, the kind most couples avoid. If your marriage feels more like managing a household than sharing a life, this conversation is a window into how two people build shared values on purpose. Timeline Summary [3:04] – What alignment in marriage actually means, and how misalignment shows up [6:09] – The daily reality of getting kids to help, and delegating chores [10:10] – Pulling back the curtain on a heated dinner with one of their kids the night before [10:52] – Why cleaning became Larry and Jessica's separate processing and thinking time [12:10] – The core values exercise and discovering they valued environment and connection, not possessions [13:36] – Their family mission: experiences over stuff, memories over things, connection over everything [16:05] – Why some couples need to buy or schedule experiences just to feel connected [17:53] – The Covid dishes conversation and Jessica's grounded response to Larry's darkest thought [19:52] – No luxury cars, no name brands, and being genuinely okay with less [22:36] – The backyard project versus a sports car, and what Ethan learned from it [24:16] – How they actually arrived at shared values through talking and reflecting [26:40] – 2017 as the turning point toward chasing experiences over stuff [27:04] – The three gifts rule at Christmas and where it came from [30:39] – Jessica's advice to their kids: communication is the key to any relationship [33:55] – Why couples talk about logistics but avoid the deeper alignment conversations [36:02] – The intimacy parallel: what happens when you stop pursuing each other [38:24] – Why they never run out of things to talk about, even after 23 years [40:14] – Can people be taught to communicate, or is that just who they are? [44:43] – Alignment as the make or break, and the non-negotiables they built together [45:33] – Going to bed at the same time, and when it's actually okay to go to bed angry 5 Key Takeaways Alignment Is the Make or Break — Most couples are quietly misaligned on parenting, money, intimacy, and faith, and it derails their connection without them realizing why. Building shared values on purpose is what holds a marriage together over decades. Experiences Over Stuff — Larry and Jessica built a family mission around memories over things and connection over everything. The backyard they gather in beat the sports car precisely because it creates shared experiences instead of solo possession. Communication Has to Be Daily — Talking through logistics isn't the same as real communication. Checking in every day, even briefly, keeps small tensions from compounding into the silence and assumptions that quietly end marriages. Don't Let Intimacy Drift — Just like conversation, physical intimacy erodes when you stop pursuing each other. Let too much time pass and it becomes awkward and hard to return to, so keep reaching for each other before the gap widens. You Can Change If It Matters Enough — "That's just who I am" is an excuse, not a fact. People revert to old patterns, but anyone can learn to communicate better if the relationship matters enough to them to keep practicing. Links & Resources Episode page and all links: https://thedadedge.com/1522 Roommates to Soulmates (cohort 3, starts September 16, free preview calls September 8 and 9): https://thedadedge.com/soulmates Dad Edge Day with the Arizona Cardinals (November 15, Cardinals vs Rams, State Farm Stadium): https://thedadedge.com/nfl Enjoyed This Episode? If hearing Larry and Jessica lay out the values they built on purpose made you wonder where you and your spouse are actually aligned, pick one area and talk it through this week. Ask your partner what they'd want more of, or download the 25 questions and work through a couple on your next date. If the show keeps delivering, follow, rate, and leave a review so more fathers can find these conversations.

Present Fatherhood That Always Beats Perfect Fatherhood featuring Randy Keith

Officer Randy Keith is a military veteran, a 15-year law enforcement officer, and the founder of Present Father, a platform that now reaches hundreds of thousands of dads across the world. He didn't set out to build a movement. He built it from the darkest chapter of his life, a high-conflict divorce that put him through false allegations, an order of protection that nearly cost him his career, CPS interviews of his young children, and the terror of dropping his kids off not knowing if he'd get them back. Randy walks Larry through the night it all began, why he chose 50-50 custody when his attorney said he could have won full custody, and the moment in his car around the corner from his ex-wife's house when he pulled out his phone and started talking, the post that became Present Father. This is a raw conversation about father's rights, staying present against enormous odds, and turning your mess into your message. It's also a heavy one, with an honest look at how many men in these situations reach the edge, and why community can be lifesaving. Timeline Summary [1:23] – The night his ex-wife went for the gun safe and he called 911 [4:34] – Declining to press charges because he didn't want to jail the mother of his kids [5:48] – Discharged in hours after telling nurses he was abusing his power as an officer [7:14] – Filing a Title 36 mental health petition and getting emergency custody [9:01] – Choosing 50-50 so he could look his kids in the eye someday [10:15] – His attorney saying he was in the driver's seat and could have full custody [12:13] – Served with an order of protection built on false allegations [13:09] – How a federal firearm statute nearly ended his law enforcement career [14:38] – His kids interviewed by CPS at school without his knowledge [15:40] – The mosquito-bite doctor's note that became a bedbugs and abuse allegation [17:25] – Inviting CPS in, and being asked to teach parenting classes at the end [20:49] – Why she really moved four hours away, and the job that lasted two weeks [23:28] – The threats that continue and the fears he carries as a target [26:35] – Finding purpose in the worst season and turning mess into message [30:10] – Why high-conflict divorce is rare, and why so few men talk about it [33:28] – Introducing Randy Keith and the Present Father platform [36:00] – The moment in the car that birthed Present Father [38:24] – The first TikTok post and the flood of men who felt the same [42:30] – From 800 followers to nearly 900,000 across platforms [44:08] – The suicide messages, and how Randy responds personally [46:08] – Sean Pearson and the Dad to Dad peer support platform [47:22] – The father who thanked him for comforting his son in his final moments [48:06] – Larry on losing two men from the Dad Edge community to suicide [50:30] – The therapist's question that reframed suicide for Larry in 2017 [52:22] – Why the pain is a season, not a life sentence [53:39] – Larry on being glad he didn't listen when people said "this too shall pass," and glad he listened just enough [54:08] – The vision for Present Father: a nonprofit providing attorneys to the falsely accused [54:35] – Advocating in D.C. for equal shared parenting as the standard [56:05] – Bankruptcy as a common cost of fighting for your kids [56:34] – What he learned from his first relationship and carried into his new marriage [57:57] – Why one bad experience doesn't mean everyone will treat you the same [59:55] – Where to connect with Randy and the Present Father Show 5 Key Takeaways Presence Beats Perfection — Your kids don't need a perfect father. They need a present one. Even when circumstances are stacked against you, showing up consistently is what matters most. Your Mess Is Your Message — You don't have to be the polished expert to help people. Randy's raw honesty as an everyday guy going through it reaches people precisely because it's real and relatable, not because he has it all figured out. The Pain Is a Season, Not a Sentence — In the darkest moments it feels like it will never end, but it's temporary. Suicide doesn't end the pain, it transfers it to the people you love most, for generations. Reaching out and finding community can be lifesaving. You're Not Alone in This — High-conflict divorce and false allegations are isolating, and shame keeps men silent. Finding even one other person who's been through it turns unbearable isolation into a community and a path forward. One Bad Experience Isn't the Whole World — Surviving a devastating relationship doesn't mean everyone will treat you the same way. With honest due diligence and self-work, there is happiness and partnership on the other side. Links & Resources Episode page and all links: https://thedadedge.com/1521 Present Father (Randy Keith's website): https://present-father.com The Present Father Show podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/2PZwSoq6glUSq20CcHB88R Roommates to Soulmates (cohort 3, starts September 16, free preview calls September 8 and 9): https://thedadedge.com/soulmates Dad Edge Day with the Arizona Cardinals (November 15, Cardinals vs Rams, State Farm Stadium): https://thedadedge.com/nfl If You're Struggling This episode deals openly with suicide. If you or someone you know is struggling, you can call or text 988 in the US to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, available 24/7. You are not alone, and the season you're in is not the end of your story. Enjoyed This Episode? If Randy's story reached you, whether you're in the middle of your own hard season or you know a dad who is, don't let him carry it alone. Send this episode to a father who needs to hear that presence beats perfection and that he's not alone in this. If the show keeps delivering, follow, rate, and leave a review so more fathers can find these conversations.

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How We Make Our Marriage Work With Four Kids and a Business featuring Larry & Jessica Hagner

Larry is back with his wife Jessica for the third installment of their Friday couples series, and this one tackles the quiet killer of long marriages: the drift. That slow slide where you get so buried in kids, sports, work, and the house that you look up years later and realize you lost each other somewhere along the way. Married 22 years, they're honest that they've hit those valleys too, and this episode is about how they catch it and climb back out. Larry opens up about being the avoidant one early on, walking away from hard conversations because it felt selfless when it was actually disconnecting. From there he and Jessica map the exact tools that interrupt the drift: telling your partner what's in your head so they don't assume it's them, the six-second hug that resets everything, the safety that lets you give hard feedback, and the certainty of saying "I need an hour, but I'll be back." If your marriage feels more like two ships passing in the night, this is a practical way back to each other. Timeline Summary [1:01] – Spinning in different orbits and what it means to interrupt the drift [2:03] – Jessica's first solo episode goes live and the nerves around it [3:47] – How couples drift: five years pass and the connection is just gone [5:05] – Larry owning that he was the avoidant one who'd walk away or sleep downstairs [6:32] – Why walking away felt selfless but was actually selfish and disconnecting [6:50] – Jessica's ask: take your space, but tell me it's not about me and you'll be back [7:39] – The neighbor at the fire pit and the garage door scam that sent him inward [9:49] – What's really happening in a man's head: the shoulds that make it worse [11:01] – The real-world date day where Larry chose to say "actually, that's a lie, I'm challenged" [12:45] – The stories men tell themselves: it's stupid, it'll go away, I'll burden her [14:15] – Wanting connection but doing the one thing that disconnects [14:58] – Jessica's gift: reading people and diffusing tension with a hug [17:23] – Letting women off the hook on nagging, and how to poke with love not gaslighting [18:17] – The six-second hug, oxytocin, and being found out when she hugs him [22:12] – What Jessica needs as a stay-at-home mom: reassurance and connection [24:08] – The certainty of a repair: 30 minutes versus a whole sucky day [24:30] – Last fall's drift, Larry's most impatient season, and asking for feedback [26:25] – The three breadcrumbs: safety, certainty, and repair [27:28] – Why Jessica felt safe enough to give feedback that would land rough [28:14] – Choosing words wisely and avoiding always and never [30:32] – Young and green on relationship dynamics in the early years [31:01] – Marriage as the stock market: valleys and peaks with no tolerance to stay down [33:15] – Honesty and ownership celebrated, not punished, for kids and spouses alike [35:11] – Being held to a higher standard in your worst moments and feeling safe [37:18] – The certainty of "I'll be back in an hour" versus being forced to hash it out now [41:00] – Jessica on why she'd rather cool off than fight in a heated moment [42:38] – Taking pause and the 24-hour rule before responding when triggered [44:22] – Love languages and approaching each kid differently [45:04] – The coaching example: "why did you do X" versus "tell me about that" [47:28] – Meeting each other with compassion and curiosity, not accusation [47:50] – The power of we, plus the Colton-in-pajamas assumption Larry got wrong [49:37] – How they make time for the marriage with four kids and a business [52:26] – Zero tolerance for mediocre and refusing to just exist [53:22] – Why kids feel warm and safe when the marriage is a priority [55:03] – Setting the standard for how their sons should treat a partner [1:02:37] – A teaser for next week: intimacy and finances, the two big resentment topics 5 Key Takeaways Name What's In Your Head — When you go quiet and inward, your partner and kids often assume they're the problem. Telling them what's actually going on, even when it feels stupid or burdensome, is the difference between connection and drift. Take Space, But Give Certainty — Walking away without a word breeds anxiety and uncertainty. Saying "I need an hour to process, but I'll be back to talk about this" lets you cool off while promising your partner the conversation isn't over. The Six-Second Hug Resets Everything — A real, drawn-out hug, not a quick pat, releases the oxytocin that brings peace and diffuses tension. Learning to read when your partner needs that connection is a gift you can give daily. Make Feedback Safe — People only give honest feedback when they trust it won't be met with defensiveness or explosion. Choosing words carefully, avoiding always and never, and holding your partner to a higher standard in their worst moments keeps that safety intact. Have Zero Tolerance for the Valley — Every marriage has peaks and valleys like the stock market. What keeps it strong isn't avoiding the dips, it's refusing to accept staying there, and proactively cultivating connection even in the busy, exhausted seasons. Links & Resources Episode page and all links: https://thedadedge.com/1520 Roommates to Soulmates (cohort 3, eight-week program, starts September 16, free preview calls September 8 and 9): http://thedadedge.com/soulmates 25 Intimate Conversation Starters (free PDF and video training): https://thedadedge.com/25questions Dad Edge Day with the Arizona Cardinals (November 15, Cardinals vs Rams, State Farm Stadium): https://thedadedge.com/nfl Enjoyed This Episode? If "spinning in different orbits" describes where you and your spouse are right now, pick one tool from this episode and use it this week. Tell your partner what's actually in your head instead of saying "I'm fine," or give them a real six-second hug the next time you can feel the tension. If the show keeps delivering, follow, rate, and leave a review so more fathers can find these conversations.

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How to Bring Up Sex Without Making Her Feel Like She Failed featuring Cailtin V

Caitlin V is a sexologist, relationship coach, and host of Good Sex on HBO Max who has built a YouTube channel with nearly a million subscribers and over 170 million views, working primarily with men on erectile dysfunction, performance anxiety, premature ejaculation, and the isolation that comes with all three. She started as a sexual health researcher and policy analyst before deciding that change happens in conversations with real people, not in research papers. This is a live Dad Edge Alliance Q&A where Caitlin takes real questions from married men about a sexless stretch, shame carried into the marriage bed, sex used as leverage, and a marriage that has gone completely touchless. If you have been avoiding the conversation with your wife because the last time you brought it up it went badly, this one gives you the actual script. Timeline Summary [4:12] – Caitlin's path from sexual health researcher and policy analyst to sexologist and coach [6:14] – First question, a husband who pushed too hard once and has been gun shy ever since [9:06] – Why a multi year backlog of unsaid things lands on one conversation and crushes it [11:01] – The cracked foundation, why repair has to come before any talk about frequency [13:35] – Reading her green lights and lobbing the flirtation back without adding pressure [16:33] – Naming the dynamic out loud as an act of leadership instead of a confession [23:58] – Why "the talk" is the wrong model for sex, with your kids and with your wife [27:39] – Nature abhors a vacuum, if she doesn't know what sex means to you she fills it in [31:25] – Anonymous question, premarital sex, religious shame, and less sex after the wedding [36:51] – The taboo factor, why sanctioned sex can lose the charge that breaking the rule provided [40:04] – Shame hates light, why you can't clean it out of her and what you can do instead [47:00] – Anonymous question, sex promised as a thank you that almost never arrives [53:09] – Why nobody can pre consent, and taking penetration off the required list [56:09] – What's underneath sex used as leverage, and how to rewrite that agreement together [59:11] – Anonymous question, a touchless marriage after years of backing off out of respect [1:03:25] – Betty Martin's Wheel of Consent and the Three Minute Game as the road back to touch 5 Key Takeaways Repair Before Frequency — Asking for more sex when years of unsaid things are still sitting there is like redecorating a living room on a cracked foundation. Go back and own what you didn't say first, then build. Name the Dynamic Out Loud — Leadership here is not initiating harder, it's surfacing the pattern so you're both looking at the same thing. Say "I haven't been lobbing these back because I'm afraid" instead of waiting for her to move first. She's Filling In Your Blanks — If your wife doesn't know the texture of what sex actually means to you, she fills that vacuum with social media, her friends, and her parents' marriage. "All you think about is sex" is usually a response to something that was never you. Warmth With an Invoice — If your past kisses and shoulder rubs came with a hidden price tag, she felt it, and that's why affection now reads as a bid. Own it plainly, then rebuild non-sexual touch on purpose. Nobody Can Pre Consent — Agreeing to sex tomorrow is like agreeing to salmon for dinner, the appetite can legitimately change. Keep more than intercourse on the table so a shift in the moment isn't a broken promise. Links & Resources Episode page — https://thedadedge.com/1519 Roommates to Soulmates, Larry's 8 week program, cohort three starts September 16 — https://thedadedge.com/soulmates Dad Edge Day with the Arizona Cardinals, November 15 at State Farm Stadium — https://thedadedge.com/nfl Betty Martin's Wheel of Consent and the Three Minute Game — https://www.schoolofconsent.org Caitlin V's courses, 20% off with code DADEDGE, including Yoni Massage, Come When You Want, Hard As You Want, and Legendary Lover Enjoyed This Episode? If the "warmth with an invoice" idea landed the way it lands for most guys, you already know which conversation you've been putting off. Send this to a brother who's been quietly telling himself that not bringing it up counts as respecting her. Follow the show, leave a rating and review, and grab the full show notes at https://thedadedge.com/1519

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The Guardrails That Keep Our Disagreements From Becoming Fights featuring Larry & Jessica Hagner

Larry is back in studio with his wife Jessica for part two of their conversation, recorded the week of their 22nd anniversary. Last week they covered how they met and the crucibles that shaped them. This week they get practical about the daily mechanics of a marriage that works: how they got aligned on parenting, how they resolve conflict, and how they back each other up in front of the kids whether they agree or not. They're candid that none of it came naturally at first. They walk through the parenting classes that helped early on, a hard season with one of their sons that turned out to be driven by a medication reaction, and why setting ego aside to get outside help was the move that saved them repeatedly. Jessica shares what it means to never be emasculated or called a name in thirty years together, and Larry breaks down the guardrails that keep their disagreements calm: no yelling, no name calling, real listening, and a willingness to eat humble pie. If your marriage feels more like managing a household than sharing a life, this one is a window into the operating system of a couple who clearly still like each other. Timeline Summary [1:02] – Why part two matters, and Jessica joins for parenting and conflict resolution [4:39] – A new season with an adult son and the land of uncertainty it brings [6:39] – Bringing the first baby home to a tornado, and every season being new territory [9:07] – The one thing they nailed early: alignment on parenting styles [10:21] – Love and Logic, 1-2-3 Magic, and the classes that gave them a shared playbook [11:34] – A hard season with Mason at 11 and refusing to let ego stop them from getting help [13:15] – Communication gap: Larry not seeing how bad the mornings really were [16:39] – Owning that "I have to work" wasn't the support Jessica needed [17:23] – The real catalyst turned out to be a medication, and the game-changing fix [18:43] – Having each other's back in front of the kids, no public disagreement [19:47] – The quiet aside instead of the public callout, coming back as a combined unit [21:39] – The over-punishment story: stacking consequences on Ethan's grades [22:54] – Why never being emasculated or disrespected publicly matters so much to a man [25:44] – The non-negotiable guardrails: no name calling, ever, even joking [27:15] – Listening without interrupting and keeping voices calm [30:09] – Tonality, ownership, and a family that apologizes well [34:32] – Why these habits are their operating system but not most people's [35:10] – The waterfall of peace: how Jessica's affection quiets Larry's chaos [36:33] – Not gaslighting a partner who's having a hard day, and giving space to process [37:30] – The "what did you do all day" mistake and never globalizing with always and never [40:43] – The deck argument Ethan witnessed and asked if they were divorcing [42:22] – Ethan's three observations: no yelling, real listening, no name calling [42:40] – Asking "is there truth to this" to sidestep the ego and defensiveness [45:02] – The trash story: coming in guns blazing and eating humble pie [49:11] – Covering for each other's hard seasons with the kids instead of piling on [50:04] – Favorite memories: the simple stuff, laughter under their own roof [52:16] – Valuing experiences over stuff, and how that alignment happened [55:19] – Closing out Mason's last year at home with a bang [56:53] – The 25 intimate conversation starters that keep them connected 5 Key Takeaways Get Aligned and Get Help Without Ego — The couples who struggle most are often fighting over whose parenting style wins. Larry and Jessica treated hard seasons as problems to solve together, bringing in classes and counselors rather than letting pride keep them stuck. Have Each Other's Back in Front of the Kids — Never publicly override your spouse's discipline. Handle disagreements privately, then return to the kids as a combined unit. Kids who can't split their parents feel more secure, not less. Set Guardrails for Conflict — No name calling, no yelling, and real listening while the other person talks. These simple, non-negotiable rules keep disagreements from escalating into damage, and kids notice and absorb them. Ask "Is There Truth to This" — When your partner brings a criticism, the instinct is to defend. Pausing to genuinely ask whether there's truth in it disarms your ego and turns a potential fight into a conversation. And when you're wrong, apologize fast. Protect Each Other's Hard Seasons — When one parent is short-tempered or struggling, the other explains it to the kids with grace instead of piling on. Give your partner room to process a bad day rather than gaslighting or nagging them out of it. Links & Resources Episode page and all links: https://thedadedge.com/1518 25 Intimate Conversation Starters (free PDF and video training): https://thedadedge.com/25questions Dad Edge Day with the Arizona Cardinals (November 15, Cardinals vs Rams, State Farm Stadium): https://thedadedge.com/nfl Enjoyed This Episode? If watching Larry and Jessica lay out the guardrails of their marriage gave you something to aim at, pick one and try it this week. Ask "is there truth to this" the next time you feel defensive, or take your spouse through a couple of good questions on your next date night. If the show keeps delivering, follow, rate, and leave a review so more fathers can find these conversations.

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The Situational Awareness Skills Every Dad Should Teach His Family featuring Sam Rosenberg

Sam Rosenberg has spent his career protecting some of the most recognized people on the planet, heads of state, CEOs, and celebrities including Warren Buffett, Benjamin Netanyahu, and Tom Cruise. A former Marine Corps officer who moved into close protection in 1996, he's since shifted his focus to teaching ordinary people the same skills he used to guard public figures, through his company Live Ready and his bestselling book of the same name. He's trained tens of thousands of people to recognize threats before they become emergencies. This one is a genuine masterclass in personal safety, and Sam's philosophy anchors it: it's good to have a lifeguard, but you should know how to swim. He and Larry get into why violence is never actually random, how to read a parking lot, the acronym TIME that maps how attackers operate, the normalcy bias that keeps good people from trusting their gut, and persuasion predators, the charming, manipulative threats every dad with a daughter needs to understand. If you want to protect the people who matter most without living in fear, this episode delivers the tools. Timeline Summary [1:02] – Protecting Netanyahu, the chess match, and embedding covert protection in a crowd [4:35] – Tom Cruise in Pittsburgh and why he was one of the best to work with [6:23] – How you even land a gig protecting someone at that level [8:12] – Protecting Terry Bradshaw at the NFL draft, and why it's all word of mouth [12:36] – The core philosophy: it's good to have a lifeguard, but you should know how to swim [14:51] – Sam's full bio, the Marine Corps, Live Ready, and the book [16:34] – Situational awareness starts with our wives in parking lots [20:04] – The myth of helplessness and the myth of randomness [21:44] – Why violence is a process as predictable as boiling water [22:38] – Attacks happen on arrival and departure, and every environment has a purpose [24:10] – Watching for the watchers, and the New York City looking up analogy [26:30] – The creepy guy vibe and why we hunt for evidence to dismiss it [27:42] – Social contracting, bias, and how it blinds us to real danger [30:13] – Normalcy bias: the brain's desire for everything to be normal [32:04] – Breaking down a real, sophisticated parking lot kidnapping on video [35:36] – The simple bow: trust your intuition even without all the evidence [37:12] – What that woman could have noticed, and the double-tap unlock habit [43:14] – The TIME acronym: target selection, intelligence, method of attack, escape [46:16] – Why street criminals run the same process as terrorists [49:17] – Can you avoid being targeted? You can influence it, not always prevent it [52:04] – Charlie Kirk, Butler, and why it has to be stopped in advance [53:27] – Recognizing the interview means you've already been selected [56:16] – Hard target versus soft target, and why gimmicks don't work [57:29] – The undercover story: why street-smart observers saw through his disguise [1:02:47] – Willingness and ability are all it takes to be a hard target [1:04:31] – What bad guys are truly afraid of: failure [1:08:55] – Persuasion predators, masters of charm and disguise [1:10:31] – Reframing charm: ask why is this person trying to charm me [1:11:56] – No is a complete sentence, and the veils of denial [1:13:54] – Sociopaths, the pity play, and the puppy law used on children 5 Key Takeaways Violence Is a Process, Not Random — Attacks follow an observable, predictable sequence. Learning to spot the pattern, especially during arrival and departure moments, is what lets you get ahead of danger instead of reacting to it. Watch for the Watchers — Every environment has a purpose. Scan left to right for anomalies, people not using the space for its intended purpose, and notice who's watching who's coming and going. That awareness alone makes you a harder target. Trust Your Radar Over Normalcy Bias — Good people talk themselves out of intuitive warnings because they can't find hard evidence or don't want to seem judgmental. When something feels off, that unease is data. Default to it and remove yourself from the situation. Recognize the Interview — When a stranger approaches you in an anomalous moment, that's an interview, and it means you've already been selected as a target. How you manage that interaction, with the right body language and enough force, often determines whether an attack proceeds. Reframe Charm and Hold the Line on No — Teach daughters to ask why is this person trying to charm me rather than being flattered. No is a complete sentence, and anyone who pushes past it is signaling they care only about what they want. A pity play after being caught in lies is a massive red flag. Links & Resources Episode page and all links: https://thedadedge.com/1517 Sam Rosenberg's company, LiveReady: https://www.liveready.co/ Live Ready by Sam Rosenberg (the book): https://www.liveready.co/book LiveReady on YouTube (situational awareness and attack breakdowns): https://www.youtube.com/@LiveReadyCo LiveReady on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/livereadyco LiveReady on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/LiveReadyCo LiveReady on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/LiveReadyCo/ LiveReady personal training: https://www.liveready.co/training Dad Edge Day with the Arizona Cardinals (November 15, Cardinals vs Rams, State Farm Stadium): https://thedadedge.com/nfl Roommates to soulmates thedadedge.com/soulmates Enjoyed This Episode? If Sam's breakdown of that parking lot attack made you look at your own routine differently, put one habit to work this week. Get your head up and off your phone during those arrival and departure moments, and have the charm and no conversation with your daughter. If the show keeps delivering, follow, rate, and leave a review so more fathers can find these conversations.

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Small Pursuits That Rebuild a Disconnected Marriage featuring Joe Bailey

This is a Wednesday Wins Q&A, with Larry joined by his longtime co-host Joe Bailey to tackle a question that lands for almost every married dad. Mike from Washington State wrote in about a marriage that isn't broken, no fighting, no affairs, but feels more like two coworkers running a small company called the family. He and his wife talk schedules, kids, and bills, physical intimacy has slowed, and as he puts it, he misses her even though she's only six feet away. Larry breaks down the four pillars of marriage from Lance and Brandi's work, individual, partnership, friends, and intimacy, and explains how couples get stuck in the partnership loop and skip straight to intimacy, which backfires. Joe follows with the idea of getting used to the light again after emotional disconnection, releasing resentment, and making small pursuits without attaching expectations. If your marriage feels more like a business partnership than a romance, this one is a practical roadmap back. Timeline Summary [1:02] – Setting up Mike's question about a marriage that feels like a business partnership [2:12] – Mike's full letter: coworkers running a company called our family [3:46] – Larry on his own first decade feeling exactly the same way [4:05] – The four pillars of marriage from Lance and Brandi's book [4:46] – Pillar one, individual: self-care and emotional check-ins by percentage [5:42] – Pillar two, partnership: the bills, roles, and chores, aka the partnership loop [5:59] – Pillar three, friends: shared interests and real alignment [6:21] – Pillar four, intimacy, and why it collapses when the others are neglected [6:47] – How couples skip friendship and self and jump straight to intimacy [7:26] – Disrupting the partnership loop by cultivating friendship first [7:49] – The walk-and-date boundary: be Larry and Jessica, not Mom and Dad [8:13] – Bookending conversations with appreciation so your partner feels seen [8:30] – Adventuring together and asking bucket-list questions [9:34] – Why men eradicate their own self-care and isolate [12:12] – Joe on living this exact dynamic in his own marriage [12:32] – The dark-theater analogy: getting used to the light again [13:35] – Step one, release resentment when reconnection feels uncomfortable [14:02] – Be persistent and stop attaching sex to every act of connection [14:27] – Small pursuits: flowers and a coffee dropped off at Ivy's work, just because [15:46] – Small investments compound like a financial portfolio [16:40] – Stop keeping score and get in the habit of just investing [16:59] – The car story: we love the things we invest in [20:07] – Loving your wife publicly and without agenda [20:44] – Loving her in front of the kids and her mother [21:48] – The Hitch analogy and winning over the people around her [22:14] – The marriage hack: your mother in law as your greatest ally 5 Key Takeaways Marriage Has Four Pillars — Individual, partnership, friends, and intimacy. When you neglect self-care, friendship, and quality time and jump straight to intimacy, it falls flat. Intimacy is the natural result of the other three working. Escape the Partnership Loop — If every conversation is about schedules, bills, and who needs to be where, you're stuck in the partnership loop. Break out by rebuilding the friendship: dates, walks, adventures, and conversations where you're a couple, not just co-parents. Get Used to the Light Again — After emotional disconnection, reconnecting feels awkward and uncomfortable for both people. Expect that, release resentment about it, and don't attach worst-case scenarios to the discomfort. Make Small Pursuits Without Agenda — Drop off flowers just because, and don't attach any expectation of sex, because she'll sniff that out instantly. Stop keeping score and keep making small investments, and the connection compounds over time. We Love What We Invest In — Don't wait to feel the love before you invest. As the car story shows, investment creates love, not the other way around. Love your wife publicly and without agenda, and let her people, especially her mother, become your allies. Links & Resources Episode page and all links: https://thedadedge.com/1516 Legendary Couple with Larry and Jessica: https://thedadedge.com/legendary-couple/ Dad Edge Day with the Arizona Cardinals (November 15, Cardinals vs Rams, State Farm Stadium): https://thedadedge.com/nfl Enjoyed This Episode? If Mike's letter read like a page out of your own marriage, pick one small pursuit and do it this week with zero agenda. Drop off her favorite coffee, take a walk where you're just the two of you again, and stop waiting to feel connected before you invest. If the show keeps delivering, follow, rate, and leave a review so more fathers can find these conversations.

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Connection Before Correction With Your Wife & Your Kids

This is a special live Q&A recorded inside Apogee, where the hosts turned the tables and interviewed Larry alongside his wife Jessica for a rare joint conversation. Married 23 years with four sons, the two open up about what actually creates safety in a home, and their answer surprises the room: it starts with relentlessly prioritizing the marriage. From there they get honest about the early years when Larry admits he floundered and didn't lead well, how Jessica learned to call him forward without emasculating him, and why connection always has to come before correction. They talk repair as the true measure of a relationship, letting kids witness the full cycle of a disagreement, and Larry shares the hardest parts of his own story, an estranged mother and a father who left twice, and what forgiveness has and hasn't looked like. If you want a real look inside a marriage that leads, this one delivers. Timeline Summary [1:05] – Larry and Jessica join Apogee, and the watermelon splitter jokes begin [5:03] – The Freud quote on a child's need for protection, and Larry's book for his boys [6:19] – What's really happening in a home when a child feels deeply safe [7:01] – The frying pan on the back burner: how marriages slide after kids arrive [8:29] – Marriage as a skill, not just a feeling, and the tactical work it requires [9:09] – Telling his 12 year old he prioritizes mom, and why that creates safety [10:04] – The 18 year old who wants to be home because of how his parents love [11:05] – Jessica on kids modeling what they see, and her daughter wanting flowers [13:16] – Jessica's loving, family oriented upbringing versus Larry's chaotic one [15:08] – Jessica's honesty: he did not lead very well in the early years [15:51] – Calling him forward with love instead of a finger in his face [17:28] – Connection before correction, and picking one when forced to choose [20:55] – Why calling someone forward implies connection and trust already exist [22:08] – Without connection you have no influence, even with your own kids [23:14] – Having tough conversations through activity: walks, workouts, the range [23:38] – Hold On to Your Kids and why attachment precedes instruction [24:51] – Parenting across developmental stages and the two bigs, two littles dynamic [28:01] – Why Larry found the young years hardest and came alive in the teens [29:23] – Jessica as the boy mom of empathy, affection, and don't cross me [30:29] – What repair looks like after losing patience with the kids [32:22] – Figs O'Sullivan on harmony, disharmony, and quality living in the repair [33:05] – Growing up with parents who never apologized, and breaking that cycle [35:05] – Coach Whittle's house rule: if you see the collision, you see the repair [36:12] – The deck argument Ethan witnessed and the repair he described back [38:20] – Repairing with your own parents, and the letters Apogee members are writing [41:53] – Larry's estranged mother, the milk incident, and an unsafe environment [42:37] – A father who left twice and the Starbucks reunion 18 years later [43:36] – Mason at 15 asking how he could ever forgive him [44:34] – Forgive and co-create the future, or live in the past with a grudge [46:18] – Screen time boundaries, dumb phones, and earning time through fitness [49:37] – The three page contract for an adult son living at home rent free [50:28] – Why doom scrolling infuriates Larry, and his own guilt with the work phone [57:08] – The Apogee host thanks Larry, and an early zoom happy birthday 5 Key Takeaways Protecting Kids Starts With the Marriage — The deepest safety a child feels comes from parents who prioritize each other. It's a long tail game, not a short term action, and kids who see their parents love each other feel warm, safe, and want to be home. Call Each Other Forward, Don't Tear Down — Jessica changed Larry by naming what she saw with love and respect instead of criticism, which made him want to change. That same energy, connection before correction, is exactly how they lead their sons. Without Connection You Have No Influence — Kids tune out discipline from someone they don't feel attached to. Building connection first, often through shared activity, makes every hard conversation land far better. The Relationship Lives in the Repair — Every relationship cycles through harmony, disharmony, and repair, and the quality resides in how you repair. Letting kids witness the whole cycle, including your apology, teaches them it's safe to mess up and own it. Forgiveness Is a Choice About the Future — Larry's father owned his two abandonments completely and earned a 21 year relationship, while his mother's unsafe patterns went unrepaired. You can forgive and co-create the future, or live your whole life in the past with a grudge. Links & Resources Episode page and all links: https://thedadedge.com/1507 Dad Edge Day with the Arizona Cardinals (November 15, Cardinals vs Rams, State Farm Stadium): https://thedadedge.com/nfl Connect with Jessica Hagner: https://thedadedge.com/jessicahagner/ Larry and Jessica interview each other (part one): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_aCcKKv9pXw Larry and Jessica interview each other (part two): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XsHmnQiROMo&t=138s Roommates to soulmates thedadedge.com/soulmates Enjoyed This Episode? If watching Larry and Jessica lead their marriage out loud gave you something to aim at, take one piece into your own home this week. Prioritize your spouse in front of your kids, or let them witness a full repair the next time you lose your patience. If the show keeps delivering, follow, rate, and leave a review so more fathers can find these conversations.

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The Difference Between Sight and Vision featuring Harry Psaros

Harry Psaros is an author, neuroscientist, health coach, and third degree black belt, known to Pittsburgh sports fans as the Pit Guru, but the title that matters most to him is dad. He and his wife Michelle have been married 24 years and raised two sons, and it was his journey raising Gus, who's on the autism spectrum, that led him to write his Amazon bestselling, award winning book From Struggle to Strength. He's one of the rare male voices in the autism space, and he doesn't shy away from calling other fathers forward. Harry and Larry, who's walked a similar road with his own oldest son, get into why so many dads resist an autism diagnosis, the devastating fall that erased years of Gus's progress, and the mindset that pulled the family through. Harry breaks down the two ideas from his book that have resonated worldwide: the 2% rule for cutting through overwhelm, and the difference between sight and vision. If you're a father facing a diagnosis you didn't expect, this one meets you where you are and refuses to let you stay there. Timeline Summary [1:02] – Two martial artists connect over a shared lifelong passion [7:13] – The fall down two flights of stairs and the concussion that changed everything [9:14] – Total regression: years of therapy and even the piano, gone [9:37] – Picking yourself off the mat because the endgame never changed [10:45] – Gus graduates Kent State and starts a physical therapy graduate program [12:16] – The full bio: author, neuroscientist, the Pit Guru, and a dad [14:51] – When Gus was diagnosed and why Harry was so stubborn at first [15:31] – The oddities Michelle saw that Harry couldn't accept [16:28] – The birthday party, the fan, and the teacher who said it out loud [17:57] – The two hour drive home and the moment he decided, game on [19:16] – The two types of dads, and why both need to hear this [22:26] – Gus at 22, the vision board, the degree, and the Ram truck [23:09] – The three levels of autism and why mild is never easy [24:19] – A nonverbal keynote speaker with two degrees and a full life [25:31] – Larry's own son: low muscle tone, food textures, and an IEP that led to drum major [29:33] – Larry's younger son, PANDAS, and the strep connection [31:47] – The 2% rule: one thing a day to silence the cacophony [41:58] – Sight versus vision: the daily grind and the long term picture [43:19] – Brain Balance, Dr. Robert Melillo, and lifting the autistic fog [45:21] – Why the vision piece includes estate planning for some families [47:33] – Filotimo and doing good for the sake of good, asking nothing in return [49:16] – Wanting to become a preeminent male voice in the autism space [51:10] – Your number one job as a dad is to be there for your kid [53:19] – Gus wins a National Courage Award and says yes to help one person [55:09] – Where to find the book and connect with Harry 5 Key Takeaways Control the Controllable — When a devastating setback erases years of progress, you can't change what happened. You can refocus on the endgame, pick yourself off the mat, and keep fighting toward the best version of your child. The 2% Rule — Parenting a child with extra needs floods you with everything that needs fixing at once. Pick one thing each day and make your child 2% better at it. Anything beyond that is icing on the cake. Mild Doesn't Mean Easy — A level one diagnosis still means years of therapists, neurologists, and countless hours on the road. Improvement applies at every level, and no one should tell you what your child can't do. Sight and Vision Are Both Required — Sight is the daily grind of therapies and goals. Vision is the long term picture, and it can change dramatically as your child grows, so keep both in view and adjust the vision as gains come. A True Man Shows Up — Your number one job as a dad is to be there for your kid. Resisting the diagnosis or staying on the sidelines is doing the opposite of what fatherhood requires. Get your emotions out, then dive in. Links & Resources Episode page and all links: https://thedadedge.com/1514 Dad Edge Day with the Arizona Cardinals (November 15, Cardinals vs Rams, State Farm Stadium): https://thedadedge.com/nfl Alex the Terrible scream video (referenced in episode, just for fun): https://www.youtube.com/shorts/UMZ1tqojC2Q Become a legendary couple: https://thedadedge.com/legendary-couple/ Roommates to soulmates thedadedge.com/soulmates Enjoyed This Episode? If Harry's message reached something in you, whether you're facing a diagnosis yourself or you know a dad who's still resisting one, pass it along. Send this episode to a father who needs to hear that showing up is the whole job, and pick one small thing to get 2% better at with your own kids this week. If the show keeps delivering, follow, rate, and leave a review so more fathers can find these conversations.

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How to Actually Be There When You're With Your Kids featuring Joe Bailey

This is a Wednesday Wins Q&A, with Larry joined by his longtime co-host and friend of nearly a decade, Joe Bailey. The two open up about the Bible study they've been doing together before digging into two listener questions that hit at the heart of hands-on fatherhood. First, Steve asks how to prepare his three year old daughter for a new baby sister arriving in a few weeks, and how to keep the first child feeling seen. Then Brad from Florida sends in a question that lands hard: his wife says that even when he's home, he's not really there, and his 11 year old recently cut off a story with "never mind, dad, you're not listening anyway." Larry and Joe get practical on capacity for love, protecting margin, and the exact tools they use to actually be present. If you've ever been physically home but mentally somewhere else, this one is for you. Timeline Summary [1:02] – Larry and Joe celebrate nearly a decade of friendship and their ongoing Bible study [3:09] – Steve's question: transitioning a three year old into big sister life [4:57] – The fear of not having enough love to go around, and why it's unfounded [5:19] – The Love and Logic lesson: what a new sibling feels like to a toddler [7:05] – Kids spell love T-I-M-E, and why one on one time matters most [9:36] – Joe on quality over quantity once you can't match the same hours [11:39] – Becoming a subject matter expert in whatever your kid is into [13:03] – Inviting the older child into the role of big sister without pressure [14:14] – Watching for behavioral cues before jealousy goes full fledged [14:34] – Being depth on the bench for your wife and beating the guilt monster [15:37] – Larry's chapter on raising daughters and leaning on Meg Meeker's work [16:26] – Chris Berry's daddy-daughter dates and setting the standard sky high [18:01] – Why three years old isn't too early to start dating your daughter [19:19] – Brad's question: present in body, absent in mind [21:03] – Why perception is reality when your family feels you're not there [22:16] – The name cue: teaching your family to signal when they need you fully [23:26] – Being relentless about creating margin and hard stops for work [25:24] – Larry on notifications as the window that steals your presence [25:43] – The Gary John Bishop river metaphor for the past, present, and future [28:28] – Larry's Full Presence Training and grounding through the five senses [31:07] – Joe on great expectancy with no expectations 5 Key Takeaways Your Capacity for Love Isn't Fixed — Every parent fears they can't love a second child as much as the first. Both hosts describe the same surprise each time: a fresh reserve of love shows up that you didn't know you had. Quality Beats Quantity — With more kids, you simply can't give each one the same number of hours. Get intentional instead: enter your child's world, learn what they love, and make the time you do have count. Perception Is Reality — You may feel like you're present and carrying the load, but if your wife and kids experience you as checked out, that's the reality you have to address. Validating their experience comes before defending your own. Protect Margin With Hard Stops — Decide when work starts and when it ends, and hold the line even when customers call at night. Give your family a simple cue, like saying your name, that signals you'll drop everything and give full attention. Ground Yourself in the Five Senses — When your mind drifts to the past or the future, you miss the present entirely. Deliberately noticing what you see, hear, feel, and smell in a moment with your kids pulls you fully into it. Links & Resources Episode page and all links: https://thedadedge.com/1513 Dad Edge Day with the Arizona Cardinals (November 15, Cardinals vs Rams, State Farm Stadium): https://thedadedge.com/nfl Meg Meeker episode: https://thedadedge.com/meg-meeker/ Roommates to soulmates thedadedge.com/soulmates Enjoyed This Episode? If Brad's question hit a nerve, or if you've got a new sibling on the way like Steve, take one idea from this episode and put it to work this week. Set a hard stop on work tonight, or ground yourself in the five senses the next time your kid is talking to you. If the show keeps delivering, follow, rate, and leave a review so more fathers can find these conversations.

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The 4 Survival Responses Hiding Inside Your ADHD featuring Jenna Free

Jenna Free is a counselor who specializes in ADHD, and she doesn't teach it from a textbook, she lives it, having been diagnosed herself at 32. Her work zeroes in on the piece she says the field keeps missing: dysregulation. Through her ADHD regulation groups and her training for mental health professionals, she teaches a method built around regulating the nervous system, thoughts, and behaviors, and she's put it all into her bestselling book The Simple Guide to ADHD Regulation, a Toronto Star and Globe and Mail bestseller. The core idea here reframes almost everything men think they know about ADHD. Jenna argues that most of what gets labeled ADHD is actually an ADHD brain stuck in chronic fight or flight, and that it's fixable. She and Larry get into what's happening in the brain during dysregulation, the four survival responses, why potential keeps you stuck, and how simply refusing to fight with reality can change your whole day. If you or your kids have ever felt like putting on socks is a full body assignment, this one explains why. Timeline Summary [1:58] – Getting diagnosed at 32 and finally making sense to herself [3:28] – Four careers by 35, from marketing to modeling in South Africa to teaching [9:14] – Two kids under a year and a half apart and max fight or flight [9:57] – Your mess becomes your message [10:16] – The full bio: the ADHD regulation method and a bestselling book [13:16] – What's actually happening in an ADHD brain stuck in fight or flight [14:43] – Why the fight or flight symptom list looks almost identical to the ADHD one [15:49] – The socks story and how different life feels once you're regulated [18:58] – Fight, flight, freeze, and fawn, and how each one shows up [20:39] – Why your body can't tell a to-do list from a bear [22:01] – Which survival response dominates, and whether gender or age matters [24:41] – Why this work is hard for kids and lands better with bought-in adults [25:28] – Hyperactive, inattentive, and combination types across the lifespan [26:28] – Where regulation actually starts, and why buy-in comes first [27:43] – Putting on your dysregulation goggles to see symptoms differently [29:26] – Giving yourself permission to regulate when survival mode resists it [32:44] – Physical regulation first: slowing down to signal safety to the body [35:14] – Potential versus reality and the shoulds that pull you back into panic [36:50] – The spilled box of gems and dropping the fight with reality in five seconds [38:27] – Larry's disputed parking charge and staying calm while everyone else panicked [43:12] – Do people with ADHD have less energy, or is it pouring onto the floor? [45:13] – Why Jenna's calming tone regulates her own body in real time [48:14] – How fawning and people pleasing trace back to the amygdala 5 Key Takeaways It's Often Fight or Flight, Not Just ADHD — Many of the symptoms people write off as permanent ADHD traits, the overwhelm, paralysis, and procrastination, are actually a nervous system stuck in survival mode. That part is treatable. Your Body Can't Tell a To-Do List From a Bear — Under chronic stress, blood flow leaves the prefrontal cortex so you can fight or run, which is exactly why you can't think clearly when you sit down to work. Buy-In Comes Before Any Technique — Regulation work is uncomfortable because your system thinks its old patterns are keeping you alive. You have to genuinely want the change to push through the resistance. Start by Physically Slowing Down — Walking instead of rushing, dropping your shoulders, and typing at a reasonable pace all signal safety to the body. Small shifts over time retrain the nervous system far better than fast, intense change. Stop Fighting With Reality — Shoulds, what-ifs, and "this shshouldn't have happened" throw you straight back into panic. Naming what is real and asking "now what" is one of the fastest ways to calm the system down. Links & Resources Episode page and all links: https://thedadedge.com/1512 Dad Edge Day with the Arizona Cardinals (November 15, Cardinals vs Rams, State Farm Stadium): https://thedadedge.com/nfl Roommates to soulmates thedadedge.com/soulmates Enjoyed This Episode? If Jenna's reframing of dysregulation gave you a new way to understand your own brain or your kid's, put one piece of it to work. Catch yourself the next time you're rushing and physically slow down, and notice how quickly your body follows. If the show keeps delivering, follow, rate, and leave a review so more fathers can find these conversations. This episode discusses ADHD, disordered eating, and mental health. If any of it resonates personally, consider reaching out to a licensed professional who can offer support tailored to you.

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Why Willpower Never Beats Your Subconscious featuring Thais Gibson

Thais Gibson is the co-founder of the Personal Development School and the creator of Gibson Integrated Attachment Theory, whose work on attachment and subconscious rewiring has reached more than 75 million people. He holds a PhD, is certified in over 13 therapeutic modalities, and his research shows that 88% of the more than 70,000 people he's worked with developed a secure attachment style in just 90 days. He got there the hard way, through a six and a half year opioid addiction that only broke when he understood he wasn't running from his outside world, he was running from his inside one. This one gets unusually personal. Thais breaks down the difference between the conscious and subconscious mind, why willpower alone never sticks, and the exact rewiring exercise he uses, then Larry opens up about childhood bullying and body-image fear he says he's never shared in 1,500 episodes. If you've ever set a goal your behavior refused to follow, this conversation explains why and what to do about it. Timeline Summary [1:44] – Growing up in a tumultuous household and one of Canada's longest divorce cases [2:46] – A knee surgery, painkillers, and the start of a six and a half year spiral [4:00] – The idea that changed everything: you're numbing your internal reality, not your external one [5:52] – Why sobriety finally stuck the third time around [6:20] – The sentence in a psych class that began his recovery [8:04] – Finding God, meditation, and building a real support system [11:33] – The full bio: 75 million people reached and an 88% success rate in 90 days [13:09] – The actual difference between the conscious and subconscious mind [14:14] – The Freudian iceberg and where your conditioning is stored [16:03] – Why there's no such thing as self-sabotage [19:18] – The Monday drinker: a case study in wanting to quit but not quitting [20:36] – The three pillars of why we keep choosing what we say we don't want [24:05] – Upgrading the form: how Thais turned his own anger into vulnerability [28:55] – The red converse shoes and how we wire by emotional association [29:42] – The cost benefit rewiring exercise, step by step [32:37] – What's actually happening in the brain when you reflect, write, and repeat [36:09] – Larry shares being a bullied, overweight kid and the dance that changed him [41:05] – Why body image got wired to so much pain, and what it's really about [48:34] – The three step exercise for rewiring a core wound [50:37] – Building confidence rooted in character instead of appearance [57:04] – The four attachment styles explained [1:00:14] – The fearful avoidant style and the unworthiness wound [1:04:17] – Why your attachment shows up most where you were most wounded 5 Key Takeaways Willpower Can't Beat Your Programming — Your conscious mind can't outwill your subconscious. When you keep repeating a pattern you swore you'd quit, that isn't weakness, it's your subconscious running a different program than the one you set. There's No Such Thing as Self-Sabotage — What feels like sabotage is your conscious intention and your subconscious conditioning pulling in opposite directions. Nobody wakes up planning to wreck their day. Upgrade the Form, Don't Just Kill the Habit — Every habit meets a real need. Instead of white-knuckling it away, identify what the behavior gives you and build a healthier way to get that same need met. Rewire Through Repetition, Emotion, and Imagery — The subconscious speaks in images and feelings, not logic. Recording your costs and benefits and listening back daily for 21 days builds new neural pathways while the old ones atrophy. Root Your Worth in Character, Not Appearance — Confidence based on your body or achievements can be taken away by an injury or a setback. Confidence built on evidence of who you are at your core can't be infringed. Links & Resources Episode page and all links: https://thedadedge.com/1511 Join the Dad Edge Alliance: https://thedadedge.com/join Dad Edge Boardroom Goal Setting Intensive (July 31, 8am central): https://thedadedge.com/goals The Personal Development School: https://personaldevelopmentschool.com Thais Gibson on YouTube: Thais Gibson Personal Development School The Personal Development School on Instagram: https://instagram.com/thepersonaldevelopmentschool The Pursuit of Legendary Fatherhood by Larry Hagner: referenced in episode Enjoyed This Episode? If Thais naming the gap between what you intend and what you actually do landed for you, take it as the starting point. Send this episode to a man who keeps setting the same goal every Monday, and pick one core wound to run the 21 day rewiring exercise on this month. If the show keeps delivering, follow, rate, and leave a review so more fathers can find these conversations. This episode touches on addiction, bullying, and body image. If any of it hits close to home for you, it's worth talking with a licensed professional who can offer personalized support.

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Raising Daughters Who Hold Themselves to a Standard featuring Sterling Seizert

Sterling Seizert spent his career as a US Army Special Forces Green Beret, serving as a senior communications and intelligence sergeant in 10th Special Forces Group and as a Special Operations liaison at the US Embassy in Nigeria. When he transitioned out, he carried the same discipline into entrepreneurship, and today he's the founder of Patriot Capital and Legends Lodge, overseeing eight self storage facilities worth over 58 million dollars and serving 3,100 clients. He's also the author of the new book Buy Your Freedom. This one goes deeper than either man expected. Sterling opens with a harrowing 2013 combat story, then he and Larry get into how training builds calm under pressure, servant leadership in marriage, raising daughters who hold themselves to a standard, and why honesty in a home should be celebrated rather than punished. If you want a masterclass in staying grounded when the stakes are high, this is it. Timeline Summary [2:54] – The 2013 mission in northwest Africa and the firefight that changed everything [6:11] – Holding a soldier's heart and being told to keep the rhythm [8:11] – Did training take over, or was there disbelief in the moment? [10:26] – How repetition inoculates you to the sights, sounds, and smells of the battlefield [12:32] – Advice for the average man facing his own hard situation [14:25] – Why action creates clarity and keeps you out of rumination [15:11] – The full bio: Green Beret, Nigeria, and 58 million in self storage [17:36] – Growing up in small-town Wisconsin and a colder father [20:59] – The deep question: would he still eat Taco Bell knowing what he knows? [22:21] – Did quitting ever cross his mind in selection? It never did [26:07] – The frozen ambush in North Carolina and putting suffering in perspective [30:35] – Getting recycled through small unit tactics and choosing to be an asset [32:09] – The first responder divorce rate and how he and Rebecca stayed tight [32:36] – Marriage as service, and why keeping score never works [35:09] – Serving your wife without becoming the nice guy or the domineering man [38:33] – Servant leadership, apologizing, and holding a standard at the same time [39:03] – Larry and Sterling compare their household standards for conflict [41:07] – The one question that disarms almost any argument with someone close [43:44] – The plan for when his daughters start dating, sniper school included [45:10] – Raising strong daughters to look for ambition and a standard [48:14] – What this generation of young men is missing, from social media to porn [52:03] – Cultivating real connection with daughters in the teenage years [54:13] – The one hard rule he'll raise his voice over, and why honesty gets celebrated [57:29] – The two books that changed his life, plus his own new release 5 Key Takeaways Action Creates Clarity — When you're facing something hard, assess what needs to get done and execute in order. Movement keeps you out of the rumination loop and steadily reveals the next right step. Marriage Is Service, Not Score — Approach your marriage as the person there to serve, and assume your spouse will meet you halfway. Keeping score guarantees you'll always find a way to justify why you're winning. Serve Without Being a Doormat — Servant leadership isn't groveling and it isn't domineering. Hold a real standard for how you're treated, model that same standard yourself, and pick the battles that actually matter. Assume the Best Interest — In conflict with someone close, ask whether they truly lack your family's best interest at heart. Nine times out of ten they don't, which turns the fight into the two of you against the problem. Celebrate Honesty, Don't Punish It — Make ownership safe. When kids know honesty is welcomed rather than met with punishment, you can address the actual problem instead of untangling a lie on top of it. Links & Resources Episode page and all links: https://thedadedge.com/1510 Join the Dad Edge Alliance: https://thedadedge.com/join Dad Edge Boardroom Goal Setting Intensive (July 31, 8am central): https://thedadedge.com/goals Buy Your Freedom by Sterling Seizert: https://a.co/d/0fwMJAzB Enjoyed This Episode? If Sterling's line about action creating clarity gave you something to hold onto, put it to work this week. Send this episode to a man who's stuck ruminating instead of moving, and take one honest look at the standards you're actually modeling at home. If the show keeps delivering, follow, rate, and leave a review so more fathers can find these conversations.

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How You're Stealing Time From Your Kids and Don't Even Know It featuring Joshua Becker

Joshua Becker is the founder of Becoming Minimalist, a New York Times bestselling author, and one of the leading voices in the world on intentional living. His work reaches more than 4 million followers across social media and over 1 million readers a month on his website. He spent 15 years as a pastor before discovering minimalism in his own driveway, and his newest book Uncluttered Faith makes the case that owning less isn't just practical, it's profoundly spiritual. The conversation starts with the Memorial Day garage cleanout where Joshua looked up and saw his five-year-old son swinging alone in the backyard, and goes into what he realized about Jesus' teachings on money, how he and his wife Kim navigated wanting to get rid of very different amounts, and the parable that showed him he wasn't the soil he thought he was. If you've ever spent a day off managing your possessions while your kids waited, this one will land. Timeline Summary [1:02] – Joshua on finally making the New York Times list with his fourth book [2:51] – The Memorial Day garage cleanout that started everything [4:40] – A neighbor named June changes his life in one sentence [5:23] – Seeing his son swinging alone and realizing possessions were taking him away [6:37] – Telling Kim, and starting Becoming Minimalist that Monday [7:02] – Why the very first thing he decluttered was the cars [8:57] – Starting with the easiest, most lived-in rooms instead of the garage [11:50] – Easier to clean, more money, more generosity: cataloging the benefits [13:11] – Owning fewer things means owning higher quality things [13:58] – Full introduction: 4 million followers, 1 million monthly readers, 15 years pastoring [16:32] – Realizing June wasn't the first person to tell him about minimalism, Jesus was [17:47] – Why Jesus wasn't inviting him to a boring life but a better one [20:56] – Knowing the verses for years without knowing how to actually live them out [22:39] – Five thousand advertisements a day and the world's definition of a good life [25:16] – Kim was on board, but she wanted to lose 40% and he wanted 80% [27:21] – It's always easier to see everyone else's clutter than your own [28:28] – Why men and women tend to accumulate differently [29:44] – The three moments it got hard, including "let me handle the children's clothes" [32:40] – Would he still be a minimalist if he weren't a Christian? [34:32] – Raising Salem and Alexa in it, and the test that comes with the first big paycheck [37:23] – The foundation kids can always come back to [41:03] – How minimalism forced him to redefine success [43:45] – The parable of the four soils and the weeds nobody names correctly [46:15] – Discovering he was the third soil, not the fourth 5 Key Takeaways Your Stuff Is Taking You From What Matters — It isn't just that possessions fail to make you happy. Managing, cleaning, and organizing them actively pulls you away from the people and purpose that do. Start With the Easy Rooms — Most people think decluttering means attacking the garage or the storage unit. Begin with the car and the most lived-in spaces, where you'll feel the benefit immediately and build momentum. Clean Up Your Own Clutter First — It's always easier to see your spouse's or your kids' excess than your own. You have little standing to ask anyone to let go of their things until you've dealt with yours. Owning Less Redefines Success — When you stop earning to accumulate, you're forced to answer what you're actually working for. That question reshapes your filter for nearly every decision. Worries, Riches, and Pleasures Choke Fruitfulness — In the parable of the four soils, Jesus names riches themselves, not merely the love of them. Many who assume they're the fourth soil are living as the third. Links & Resources Episode page and all links: https://thedadedge.com/1509 Join the Dad Edge Alliance: https://thedadedge.com/join Dad Edge Boardroom Goal Setting Intensive (July 31, 8am central): https://thedadedge.com/goals Uncluttered Faith by Joshua Becker: available everywhere books are sold, plus a six week small group Bible study Becoming Minimalist: https://becomingminimalist.com Joshua Becker's personal site: https://joshuabecker.com Luke 8:14, the parable of the four soils: referenced in episode The Pursuit of Legendary Fatherhood by Larry Hagner: referenced in episode Enjoyed This Episode? If the image of Joshua's son swinging alone in the backyard while he sorted boxes stopped you cold, take that as the nudge. Send this episode to a dad who spends his days off managing his possessions, and go clean out one small space this week just to feel the difference. If the show keeps delivering, follow, rate, and leave a review so more fathers can find these conversations.

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The Healed Version of You Versus the Broken One featuring Jon Gustin

Jon Gustin is the founder of Tired Dad, a community of more than 2 million followers built on one honest premise: parenting is only hard for good parents. A former personal trainer of 14 years who started making short videos during the sleepless newborn stretch of 2020, he became one of the first men online talking openly about the mental load of fatherhood. He co-hosts the Tired Dad and Tired Mom podcasts with his wife Jessica and released his book The Tired Dad: 100 Reflections on Showing Up for What Matters Most in May. Larry and Jon get into the exhaustion that comes from doing the work right, both of their fathers coming home from Vietnam unable to talk about it, the rebellion and loss that followed Jon's parents' divorce, and the ego death that pulled his marriage out of the roommate phase. If you're tired in the best way possible and still wondering whether you're doing a good job, this conversation is for you. Timeline Summary [1:02] – Parenting is only hard for good parents, and why tired means invested [3:19] – Tired from parenting, not tired of parenting [6:23] – How the newborn stretch of 2020 accidentally birthed Tired Dad [8:10] – Nobody was talking about the mental load of fatherhood, so Jon did [12:16] – The Justin Gustin problem and Larry's own Hagman mixup [13:29] – Full introduction: 2 million followers, two podcasts, and the book [16:54] – Growing up the baby of the family with siblings seven and eight years older [20:18] – A Vietnam veteran father, a World War Two grandfather, and night terrors that never left [21:55] – Watching your dad go from Superman to human during the divorce [26:38] – Running from it: partying, drugs, theft, and total chaos at 14 [28:26] – Losing friends to overdoses and deciding to get out [29:48] – Moving to Tennessee, meeting Jessica, and marrying 11 months later [34:08] – The Gottman research and why only 12% of marriages truly thrive [36:27] – Marry the right person for the right reasons, because marriage fixes nothing [37:59] – Postpartum, the roommate phase, and the darkest stretch of their marriage [40:56] – Killing the ego and why keeping score breeds resentment [43:48] – Getting sober three and a half years ago and what changed [46:42] – Ego death without becoming a doormat or a nice guy [48:55] – Eliminate the guessing and learn what your wife actually needs [52:42] – Inside the book: the weight fathers carry and the mantra to keep showing up [54:47] – Wearing exhaustion as a badge of honor versus being the healed version of you [57:18] – Legacy, being a home worth coming back to, and the 3am call 5 Key Takeaways Tired Means You're Doing It Right — If parenting feels hard and exhausting, that's evidence you care enough to invest in it. You're tired from the work, not of it. Marriage Fixes Nothing — Your partner isn't responsible for healing your wounds and you aren't responsible for healing theirs. Two people can both do their own work and build something great, but expecting rescue guarantees misery. The Ego Is a Heavy Backpack — Keeping score is the breeding ground for resentment. Dropping the ego means asking how you can help the situation, not tallying what you're not getting. Ego Death Is Not Becoming a Doormat — Killing the ego doesn't mean happy wife, happy life, or becoming a yes man. It means eliminating the guessing, expressing your own needs clearly, and understanding hers. Be the Healed Version, Not the Broken One — Carrying exhaustion proudly while running on empty leaves you injured at the end of the road. The goal is showing up tired but well, in shape for the job. Links & Resources Episode page and all links: https://thedadedge.com/1508 Join the Dad Edge Alliance (July promo: signed book, two courses, 50 conversation starters): https://thedadedge.com/join Dad Edge Boardroom Goal Setting Intensive (July 31, 8am central): https://thedadedge.com/goals The Tired Dad: 100 Reflections on Showing Up for What Matters Most by Jon Gustin: available wherever books are sold Tired Dad website: https://tireddad.com Enjoyed This Episode? If Jon's line about being tired from parenting rather than tired of it reframed something for you, pass it along. Send this episode to a dad who's running on empty and quietly wondering if he's cut out for this, and ask yourself whether you're carrying the weight well or just carrying it. If the show keeps delivering, follow, rate, and leave a review so more fathers can find these conversations.

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Why You're Surrounded by People and Still Alone featuring Marc Hildebrand

This episode flips the script. Instead of Larry hosting, Marc Hildebrand, one of the top coaches in the Dad Edge Business Brotherhood, a 20-year LAPD veteran, life coach, and founder of Modern Leadership, sits Larry down and interviews him. The jumping-off point is a hard statistic: most men are lonely, and the majority don't have a single friend they could call at 3am. Larry opens up about the mastermind that changed his life eleven years ago, the "cost of doing nothing" question that got him to say yes, the BRAVE MAN system his Boardroom runs on, and the August 2017 morning his wife told him he was losing her. If you're a man who's surrounded by people but still feels alone, or a business owner pouring everything into work while the rest of your life drifts, this one is a roadmap. Timeline Summary [1:02] – The loneliness statistic and why Larry isn't surprised it's that high [3:17] – Marc introduces Larry and the role-reversal format [7:04] – The first mastermind eleven years ago and mentor Aaron Walker [8:45] – Rusty relationships and why "fine, good, busy" keeps men shallow [10:03] – The $500-a-month invitation that sounded like snake oil [11:55] – The question that changed everything: the cost of doing nothing [13:45] – Sitting with the chills, imagining life a year out, and calling back in 12 minutes [16:24] – What pulled Larry to lean in instead of talking himself out of it [19:03] – "Show me your calendar and I'll show you what's important to you" [22:59] – Why it's never the business, it's the person running the business [25:41] – The BRAVE MAN system explained category by category [29:53] – Why the room, not just the strategies, is what gets men to change [30:52] – The black belt lesson: that's when the training actually begins [35:02] – Attracting your wife back to you instead of chasing [36:22] – The August 2017 morning Jessica said "you're losing me" [40:30] – Masculine and feminine energy, and helping your wife soften [44:11] – Inside the quarterly Goal Setting Intensive [47:19] – Why the Boardroom is only 20-25% about business [50:26] – Living an "and" life instead of an "or" life [52:36] – The Dad Edge core values, read in full for the first time [58:04] – Who the room is for, and how to join the intensive 5 Key Takeaways The Cost of Doing Nothing — When weighing an investment in yourself, the real question isn't the price. It's what your life looks like a year from now if you change nothing at all. It's Never the Business — Entrepreneurs blame the business for their disconnection, burnout, and lost health. The hidden truth is that it's the person running the business, and reactivity is the pattern to break. Attract, Don't Chase — Chasing your spouse reads as needy, desperate energy. Leading from a grounded, positive masculine presence lets her soften and pulls her back toward you. Set "And" Goals, Not "Or" Goals — You don't have to choose between growing your business and connecting with your family. The right question is how one could actually strengthen the other. The Room Is the Gold — Skills and strategies matter, but transformation happens in a room of trusted men who share wins in detail, hold public accountability, and call each other forward. Links & Resources Episode page and all links: https://thedadedge.com/1515 Join the Dad Edge Alliance: https://thedadedge.com/join Dad Edge Boardroom Goal Setting Intensive (July 31, 8am central, 10 guest spots): https://thedadedge.com/goals Enjoyed This Episode? If the "cost of doing nothing" question landed for you the way it landed for Larry, don't let it sit. Send this episode to a man who's surrounded by people but still feels alone, and ask yourself honestly who your own 3am call would be. If the show keeps showing up for you, follow, rate, and leave a review so more fathers can find these conversations.

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How Childhood Trauma Quietly Runs Your Marriage featuring Stefanos Sifandos

Stefanos Sifandos returns to the show six years after his first appearance, and this time the conversation goes straight to the bone. A behavioral scientist and relationship expert who's worked with Olympic gold medalists, world champion fighters, special forces operators, and high-performing couples, Stefanos helps successful people confront the emotional armor and old patterns that achievement can't hide. He's also the author of the new book Tuned In and Turned On. Larry and Stefanos both grew up with volatile, abusive fathers, and they open up about the exact moments they stood up to the men who terrorized them, the survival patterns that followed them into adulthood, and the slow inner work of forgiveness. If you're a man carrying more than you've ever said out loud, this conversation names it and points to a way through. Timeline Summary [1:02] – Stefanos returns after six years and revisits growing up in violence [3:09] – A gambler father, criminal company, and never knowing which version you'd get [4:39] – How the abuse shifted between two brothers over the years [6:24] – Leaving the country at 18 and the eldest-child savior role [7:40] – Larry shares his own story of standing up to his mom's abusive boyfriend [10:09] – Why a terrifying confrontation can be a painful gift with a long trajectory [12:40] – Stefanos on the night at the kitchen bench when he told his dad "I'm not small anymore" [18:46] – Stefanos' full background in behavioral science, performance, and embodiment [21:24] – The unconscious, fractured initiation from boyhood into manhood [23:44] – Larry on deliberately taking his sons through rites of passage [24:26] – Where the relationship with his father stands now, and the memoir project [27:15] – Forgiveness as an inside job and letting go without relying on the other person [29:37] – Scarcity, hypervigilance, and why the nervous system prepares for the worst [36:18] – Why 80% of healing is how others show up and meet you [38:41] – How children internalize abuse as proof they're unworthy [41:24] – The book's practices: get a friend, and why men are so isolated [46:20] – Deliberate solitude in nature and learning to slow down [48:55] – Seeking physical challenge as the path to real confidence 5 Key Takeaways Standing Up Is an Initiation — For many men, the shift from boyhood to manhood happens through a raw, unchosen confrontation rather than a healthy rite of passage. Naming that moment helps you understand who you became because of it. Forgiveness Is an Inside Job — Closure doesn't require the other person to change or even participate. Peace comes from your own diligent inner work, not from waiting on an apology. Your Survival Patterns Made Sense Once — Scarcity thinking and catastrophizing were hypervigilant survival tools in childhood. The work isn't to shame them away, but to notice them and stop feeding the beast. Healing Is Relational — Around 80% of transformation is being met with compassion and nonjudgment by someone who can relate to you. Insight matters, but connection is what actually changes you. Get a Friend, Then Get Alone — Men are epidemically lonely, so build real friendships despite the risk. Then balance that with deliberate solitude in nature and physical challenge that builds genuine confidence. Links & Resources Episode page and all links: https://thedadedge.com/1506 Join the Dad Edge Alliance: https://thedadedge.com/join Dad Edge Boardroom Goal Setting Intensive: https://thedadedge.com/goals Tuned In and Turned On by Stefanos Sifandos: published by Hay House, February 2026 (audiobook includes bonus material) Stefanos Sifandos on Instagram: https://instagram.com/stefanossifandos Stefanos Sifandos on YouTube: https://youtube.com/@stefanossifandos Follow Stefanos Sifandos on Facebook and TikTok: search "Stefanos Sifandos" The Pursuit of Legendary Fatherhood by Larry Hagner: referenced in episode Enjoyed This Episode? If Stefanos' line about men leaking their pain sideways into aggression and avoidance hit home, don't carry it alone. Send this episode to a man in your life who might be quietly isolated, and think about who your own 3am friend would be. If the show keeps showing up for you, follow, rate, and leave a review so more fathers can find these conversations.

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