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Same Team with The Freemans

Aaron & Jocelyn Freeman

SAME TEAM: the podcast to help you become the best partner, parent, and person you can be! (formerly Empowered Couples)

Hosted by your favorite couple, The Freemans, the husband-and-wife duo behind viral marriage content seen by 20M+ people every month. Both hold master's degrees in psychology, are authors, coaches, and parents... but what makes them stand out is how real and relatable their advice is. Most couples say: "Are they watching us?!"

After 10+ years of coaching and 400+ episodes, this show still gives couples the practical tools, real talk, and honest coaching that most relationships are missing. Now they're also bringing on guest experts to share hard-won wisdom on marriage, parenting, and family life. Whether you're in a tough season or just want to stay connected through the chaos of life, you'll walk away from every episode with something you can actually use.

If you're ready to improve communication, resolve conflict faster, and feel emotionally connected again, subscribe now. You'll want to binge past episodes and never miss what's next.

P.S. The Freemans are also excited to celebrate that their new book, SAME TEAM, is now available for pre-order at meetthefreemans.com/sameteam

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#451
Thursday · 41 min
Should One of You Pause Your Career After Kids? How Couples Decide Together with Neha Ruch: Episode 451
There's a key distinction between taking a "pause" and a "power pause" when it comes to downshifting your career after having kids, and our guest, Neha Ruch, explains exactly what it is. Neha is the voice behind the movement that reframed stay-at-home motherhood for a new generation of ambitious women. As founder of The Power Pause (formerly Mother Untitled) and author of the USA Today bestseller of the same name, she has helped hundreds of thousands of women see time in family life as a purposeful chapter, not a detour. In this episode, we also dig into the ever-changing expectations in marriage as you move through milestones like having kids, how to keep resentment from building, and how to navigate money as a couple, all while staying on the same team. You'll walk away knowing how to bring up this conversation without it feeling like a threat, what each of you needs to feel respected and seen, and how to keep a big decision from turning into resentment later. Whether you're considering a pause, already in one, or supporting a partner who is, this one will give you words to use at your own kitchen table. 📕 Pre-order our book SAME TEAM and you'll instantly get two guides, the 10-Minute Nightly Check-In and 12 Same Team Phrases to De-Escalate Tension, plus an entry to win an all-expenses-paid couples getaway to Scottsdale, Arizona for every pre-order before January 26: meetthefreemans.com/sameteam 👉 Find Neha's book The Power Pause and her free Sunday newsletter at thepowerpause.com, and follow her on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/neha_ruch/ 👉 Our big dream is to get this book into 100,000 homes by launch. If this episode speaks to you, we would love your help sharing it with the people you love.
#450
November 3 · 27 min
Are You Arguing or Fighting? The 5 Differences Between Teammates and Opponents: Episode 450
Every time you disagree, it turns into a fight. Or you've gotten so afraid of the fight that you stop saying what you need at all. Either way, old hurts show up, you talk over each other, and you end up feeling more distant than when you started. Most couples don't have an arguing problem. They have a fighting problem. In this episode of Same Team with The Freemans, Jocelyn and Aaron break down the 5 differences between arguing and fighting, so you can tell which one you're in and get back on the same side. You'll learn how to keep today's issue from turning into a trial about the past, how to take turns so you both feel heard, how to ask a clarifying question before you assume, how to stay honest without getting hurtful or reactive, and how to measure an argument by whether you feel closer when it's over. You'll also hear a real story from our own marriage about a big decision where we disagreed and still stayed teammates. 👉 Join our free webclass, How to De-escalate Conflict and Navigate Emotional Triggers: onlinecouplesworkshops.com/deescalate 📕 Pre-order Same Team: meetthefreemans.com/sameteam More resources: meetthefreemans.com/links
#449
October 27 · 28 min
The Avoidant Partner Creates the Most Conflict. Here's why: Episode 449
You bring something up and hear "I'm fine." So you stop asking. Or you're the one who goes quiet and hopes it blows over, then wonder why the tension never leaves the house. Either way, it starts to feel like you're walking on eggshells and nothing ever actually gets resolved. In this episode, we explain why the partner who avoids conflict often ends up creating more of it, and why that's not the same as being the "anxious" one in the relationship. Jocelyn shares what she could sense every time Aaron said "I'm fine," and Aaron opens up about what was really going on for him. We also walk through a study on what kids pick up on when parents argue and when they go silent. You'll walk away knowing how to take the space you need without disappearing on your partner, what to say instead of "I'm fine," and how to stop pushing issues down until they blow up later. 👉 Register for our upcoming web class on how to de-escalate conflicts and navigate emotional triggers: onlinecouplesworkshops.com/deescalate 📕 Pre-order our book SAME TEAM and you'll instantly get two guides, the 10-Minute Nightly Check-In and 12 Same Team Phrases to De-Escalate Tension, plus an entry to win an all-expenses-paid couples getaway to Scottsdale, Arizona for every pre-order before January 26: meetthefreemans.com/sameteam
#448
October 20 · 42 min· Video
How to Create Emotional Safety, Even in Difficult Moments: Episode 448
Do you ever have the experience that a simple conversation with your partner can all of a sudden can create tension? If that has happen to you more than once, you know it makes you less likely to even want to bring things up agian. In our marriage coaching with couples, we can often predict whether a conflict will escalate into more disconnection or bring them closer, and it comes down to one thing: the level of emotional safety the feel. Though that may sound obvious, the "how to" for creating this level of safety usually isn't. What we've noticed is that most couples have never actually defined what emotional safety means, so they don't know what they're building or even when it's quietly eroding. In this episode, we define emotional safety, and show you how to tell the difference between normal tension and actually feeling unsafe, plus what to do in the moment when a conversation starts to spiral. You'll learn the everyday habits that make your partner shut down, withdraw or stop bringing things up, and the simple steps that help you both stay open, even when you disagree. We share honest moments from our own marriage, and why this matters for the kids who are watching how the two of you handle hard moments. Whether you tend to react fast or go silent, you'll leave with language and steps you can use at your next tough conversation. 👉 Want to go deeper? Join our live marriage webclass on November 3rd, How to De-escalate Conflicts and Navigate Emotional Triggers. Register at onlinecouplesworkshops.com/deescalate 📕 Pre-order our book SAME TEAM and you'll instantly get two guides, the 10-Minute Nightly Check-In and 12 Same Team Phrases to De-Escalate Tension, plus an entry to win an all-expenses-paid couples getaway to Scottsdale, Arizona for every pre-order before January 26: meetthefreemans.com/sameteam 👉 Our big dream is to get this book into 100,000 homes by launch. If this episode speaks to you, we would love your help sharing it with the people you love.
#447
October 13 · 50 min
Being Married to a Spouse with the 'Mother Hunger' Wound (with Kelly McDaniel): Episode 447
In this episode we sit down with therapist Kelly McDaniel, author of Mother Hunger, to explore how the way we were cared for as children shows up in how we love, react, and connect as adults. You will realize that you don't just marry a partner, you marry their childhood. Aaron shares the birth story that shaped how he relates to touch and the real reason he once tried to break up with Jocelyn, and Jocelyn opens up about where her drive to be seen actually came from. Kelly also speaks directly to the partner on the other side of this, the one who wants to help but isn't sure how, and shares what it looks like to face it together, on the same team. 📕 Pre-order our book SAME TEAM and you'll instantly get two guides, the 10-Minute Nightly Check-In and 12 Same Team Phrases to De-Escalate Tension, plus an entry to win an all-expenses-paid couples getaway to Scottsdale, Arizona for every pre-order before January 26: meetthefreemans.com/sameteam 👉 Find Kelly's book Mother Hunger and her resources at kellymcdanieltherapy.com and on Instagram @KellyMcDanielTherapy.
#446
October 6 · 30 min
Building the "Same Team" Mindset in Your Marriage: Episode 446
You love each other, you both work hard, and still there are moments when it feels like you're playing on opposite sides, over the dishes, the bedtime routine, or the tone of one sentence at the end of a long day. Most couples never decide to become opponents. It happens so quietly that by the time you notice, you're bracing against each other instead of facing what's actually in front of you together. This is a reminder that everything is easier when you face it together, on the same team. In this first episode of the relaunched Same Team podcast, we're back after a summer away with a new name, a new mission, and a first look at the core mindset at the heart of our upcoming book. We share the hardest season of our marriage, a newborn at home and an investment that turned into 800 hours of work in the Arizona heat, and the line Aaron had to draw on every drive to that property before he ever walked back through our front door. We also get honest about what your kids are quietly learning just by watching the two of you, and we give you two phrases straight from the book that will immediately bring you back together when stress or friction try to pull you apart. 📕Pre-order SAME TEAM and you'll instantly get two guides, the 10-Minute Nightly Check-In and 12 Same Team Phrases to De-Escalate Tension, plus an entry to win an all-expenses-paid couples getaway to Scottsdale, Arizona for every pre-order before January 26: meetthefreemans.com/sameteam 👉Our big dream is to get this book into 100,000 homes by launch. If this episode speaks to you, we would love your help sharing it with the people you love.
#445
May 12 · 25 min
What Separates Couples Who Grow Apart vs Grow Together (Plus a BIG Update From Us!): Episode 445
There is one single thing that all couples who grow closer over time have in common. Though in the beginning of a relationship, you might not think that anything could get between you, what you realize as time passes is that you will need to fight… When couples start to face challenges, tests, or unforeseen circumstances – they can tend to start to turn on each other. They see each other as opponents rather than teammates. That is when they fight against each other. But this episode is going to introduce a powerful mindset shift. It's the one that has you realize that the fight is not against each other, but against the problem you are facing. Tune into this episode too as we have a big announcement. We had gotten a book deal from Penguin Random House for a brand new book, and it is now available for Pre-order. As a podcast listener you are the first to hear about it. Right now pre-order your copy of "Same Team: How to break cycles, grow closer, and model a loving marriage for your kids" and get: 1) the 10-Minute Nightly Check-in Guide AND 2) Be added to a drawing for an ALL EXPENSE PAID LUXURY TRIP to Arizona. PS - Additional resources like guides, challenges, books, and coaching can be found at: meetthefreemans.com/links
#444
April 30 · 11 min
You're Doing a Lot… But This Might Be Why Your Partner Doesn't Feel It: Episode 444
You're doing a lot. You're handling all your own responsibilities, and sometimes still picking up the slack. You're doing what needs to get done for your family. And yet… something still feels like it's not enough for your partner. Maybe your partner seems distant, less appreciative, or not as connected as you'd expect given how much you're putting in. This is one of the most common frustrations we hear from couples—the disconnect between effort and how that effort is actually received. In this episode, we unpack why doing more doesn't always translate into feeling closer, and what might be missing beneath the surface. If you've ever thought, "I'm doing everything I can… why doesn't it feel like enough?" This conversation will give you a new lens to understand what's really happening in your relationship, and 3 simple actions to take to start shifting it in a way your partner can actually feel. ✨ If you want simple, daily ways to strengthen your connection and bring more emotional and physical closeness into your marriage, join the 30-Day "Best of Us" Couples Challenge. It's designed to help you show up for each other in ways that truly land. Join now at mycoupleschallenge.com/best.
#443
April 21 · 33 min
What Women Are Taught Vs What Marriage Needs Them to Learn: Episode 443
Many women enter marriage with expectations and habits shaped long before the relationship ever began. Some were modeled growing up, others reinforced by culture, and many rooted in a genuine desire to love well and create a strong home. But what once felt natural doesn't always translate into what creates true connection and partnership in a marriage. This is where frustration can build and where many start to feel like they're putting in effort but not getting the closeness they hoped for. In this episode, we unpack the gap between what women are taught about love and relationships and what marriage truly needs to feel connected and fulfilling. This is the follow-up to last week's episode where we covered what men are taught versus what marriage needs them to learn, and together these conversations will help you see the patterns that play out between you. If you've ever felt like you're carrying a lot or not getting the response you hoped for, this will give you a new level of clarity and direction for how to move forward together. ✨ If you want simple, daily ways to strengthen your connection and bring more emotional and physical closeness into your marriage, join the 30-Day "Best of Us" Couples Challenge. It's designed to help you show up for each other in ways that truly land. Join now at mycoupleschallenge.com/best.
#442
April 14 · 35 min
What Men Are Taught Vs What Marriage Needs Them to Learn: Episode 442
Many men enter marriage doing exactly what they've been conditioned to do their entire lives. They show up with a certain mindset about what it means to contribute, support, and lead in a family. And while those instincts come from a good place, they don't always translate into what actually creates closeness, emotional safety, and a strong partnership. This is where a lot of couples get stuck. One partner feels like they're giving a lot, while the other still feels something is missing. In this episode, we unpack the gap between what men are taught to bring into a relationship and what marriage truly needs from them to feel connected and fulfilling. When this gap goes unrecognized, it can lead to frustration, miscommunication, and feeling like you're not on the same team. But once you see it clearly, it opens the door for a completely different level of understanding, connection, and respect. ❤️ If you want simple, daily ways to strengthen your connection and bring more emotional and physical closeness into your marriage, join the 30-Day "Best of Us" Couples Challenge. It's designed to help you show up for each other in ways that truly land. Join now at mycoupleschallenge.com/best.
#441
April 7 · 23 min
Assumptions About Who's Doing What and Responsibilities Slipping Through the Cracks: Episode 441
This time of year, life starts to fill up fast. Between holidays, travel plans, kids' activities, family events, and everything in between… even couples who usually feel on top of things can start to feel stretched. And it's not always the amount of responsibilities that creates tension, it's what happens when those responsibilities aren't clearly talked about. Assumptions start to form. Expectations go unspoken. And before you know it, things are slipping through the cracks or quietly falling on one person more than the other. In this episode, we're breaking down why this season tends to create more friction in relationships and what's really happening beneath the surface when things start to feel uneven or unappreciated. We'll help you recognize the patterns that lead to this dynamic and introduce a simple shift that can bring more clarity, teamwork, and follow-through into your relationship. If you want a practical way to stay on the same page, grab our Family Meeting Guide to start having these conversations weekly, or get it as a bonus when you join the 30-Day Prioritizing Us Challenge to build stronger communication and connection through this busy season. Find both of those resources here: https://www.meetthefreemans.com/links
#440
March 31 · 25 min
The Conversation Couples AREN'T Having (But Need to Grow Together): Episode 440
There is a critical conversation many couples are missing, especially after going through a challenge or hard season together. And as we close out the first quarter of the year, this is one of the most important times to have it. When couples are in a difficult season, the focus is to put your head down and get through it. And once you do, it can feel like a relief… but then it's right back into the logistics of daily life. This creates two problems. First, you miss the opportunity to reconnect and truly understand each other, which is what strengthens your bond. Second, you miss the lesson from that season, which sets you up to repeat similar challenges in the future. In this episode, we walk you through how to have the kind of conversation that not only brings you closer, but helps you take the lessons forward, so your future together is stronger because of what you've been through. Relationship Resources: If this episode resonated and you don't want to just move on from your last season but actually grow from it, we invite you to start our Level 2 Rebuilding Us Challenge. The prompts are designed to help you reconnect, reflect, and rebuild with intention. Start here: https://mycoupleschallenge.com/rebuilding
#439
March 25 · 31 min
It's Been a Tough Few Weeks - Here's How We're Working Through It & Staying United: Episode 439
Some seasons in life feel heavier than others. More pressure. Less capacity. Things outside your control. And if you're not careful, your marriage can start to feel like another place of tension instead of support. In this episode, Jocelyn opens up about the challenging few weeks we've been in and what it's revealed about how couples either turn toward each other… or slowly start drifting apart. This is a powerful reminder of what actually keeps a relationship strong when life feels overwhelming—and why most couples don't catch it until more disconnection happens or damage is done. Relationship Resources: You can find all of our best resources from guides, webclasses, to coaching sessions with this link: Top Resources
#438
March 10 · 26 min
3 Mistakes Women are Making in Marriage (and what to change): Episode 438
Last week we talked about the mistakes we're seeing men make in marriage. This week, we're turning the lens toward women. And just like before, this isn't about criticism. It's about clarity and growth. Because in most marriages, the tension isn't coming from one person being "the problem." It's coming from the way both partners' habits and reactions feed into each other. When you see the pattern, you can finally change the pattern. In this episode, we unpack three common dynamics we're seeing women fall into — patterns that unintentionally create defensiveness, discouragement, or emotional distance. Many of these behaviors come from good intentions or unmet needs, but they often land very differently than intended. If you've ever felt like you're trying so hard and still not getting the connection you want, this episode will help you understand what might be happening underneath the surface. Then give you steps to shift it. Relationship Resources: No matter where you are in your marriage; whether in a challenging season, wanting to deepen your connection, or desiring to just strengthen your relationship – we have a resource to help you do it. Find webclasses, guides, 30-day challenges, and coaching all with our Top Resources Here.
#437
March 3 · 29 min
3 Mistakes Men are Making in Marriage (and what to change): Episode 437
This week we're starting a two-part series on three mistakes we're seeing in marriages right now. And we're beginning with men. Before you brace yourself, this isn't about blame. It's about awareness. In almost every struggling relationship, there's a pattern both partners are participating in. And often, the very things a husband thinks are helping or protecting the relationship are the same things quietly creating distance. In this episode, we unpack three subtle but powerful dynamics we're seeing men fall into — patterns that impact emotional safety, initiative, and shared ownership in the marriage. These aren't character flaws. They're habits. And when you understand how they're affecting your partner everything can shift. If you want to stop repeating the same cycles and start feeling more connected, respected, and aligned as a team, this conversation is a must-listen. Next week, we're turning the lens the other direction. Because this is not about men being the issue or women being the issue. It is about the pattern between you. If you want to fully understand the dance happening in your marriage and how to actually change it, make sure you listen to part two. Relationship Resources: No matter where you are in your marriage; whether in a challenging season, wanting to deepen your connection, or desiring to just strengthen your relationship – we have a resource to help you do it. Find webclasses, guides, 30-day challenges, and coaching all with our Top Resources Here.
#436
February 25 · 40 min
Why Some Partners Don't Follow-Through and How That Impacts a Marriage: Episode 436
At our recent couples workshop, during a private conversation, a wife began crying as we described how broken follow-through slowly erodes trust in a marriage. Not because of one missed promise but because of the pattern. This pattern was to have a hopeful conversation, a commitment to change, and verbal reassurance that "this time will be different." And then… nothing changes. What many couples don't realize is that inconsistent follow-through doesn't just create frustration but it quietly chips away at trust. And when trust weakens, emotional safety and connection begin to fade with it. In this episode, we break down five specific reasons partners struggle to follow through, even when they genuinely care and want things to improve. You'll begin to see what's really happening beneath the surface, and more importantly, how to shift it. If you've felt stuck in the same unresolved issue for weeks, months, or even years, this conversation can help you break that cycle and start rebuilding trust in a tangible, lasting way. Relationship Resources: Find the Priotitize Us 30-Day Couples Challenge, our top guides, events, and private coaching details all with the resource link here: meetthefreemans.com/links
#435
February 18 · 40 min
The 3 Islands of Marriage: Moving From Dysfunction or Function to Connection: Episode 435
Which island is your marriage on right now? In this episode, we share a simple but eye-opening framework we call The 3 Islands of Marriage: Dysfunction, Function, and Connection. Marriage naturally moves through different states depending on the season you're in. Stress, transitions, parenting, unresolved conflict, or even just routine can shift where you and your partner are emotionally. We break down: • What each island looks and feels like • The subtle signs you may be drifting • And the practical steps to move toward Connection Island Every couple will land on different islands at different times. The goal isn't to panic — it's to recognize where you are and take intentional steps forward. Because time alone doesn't move a marriage back to a healthy place. Awareness and action do. If you've been feeling disconnected, stuck in conflict, or just functioning but not truly close, this episode will help you figure out your next move. Relationship Resources Mentioned 1) Moving from Dysfunction to Function island - watch the 5 Root Causes webclass or do the Rebuilding Us Challenge 2) Moving from Function to Connection island - start the Prioritize Us couples Challenge. Each of these resources and more can be found at: https://meetthefreemans.com/links
#434
February 10 · 36 min
Honesty vs Transparency: The Missing Piece to Feeling Fully Secure and Emotionally Safe: Episode 434
Most couples believe trust is built by being honest—by not lying, not hiding anything major, and generally doing what you say you'll do. And while integrity absolutely matters, many couples are surprised to find that honesty alone still leaves gaps in connection, security, and emotional safety. You can be faithful, responsible, and well-intentioned… and yet your partner can still feel out of the loop, uncertain, or like something is being held back. That's because honesty and transparency are not the same thing and that difference matters more in marriage than most couples realize. Transparency goes beyond answering questions or avoiding outright deception. It's about being proactive, thoughtful, and emotionally present with your inner world—sharing needs while they're still small, closing gaps before they turn into doubt or resentment, and trusting your partner enough to let them in before there's a problem. In this episode, we unpack what transparency actually looks like in real marriages, the common ways couples unintentionally avoid it, and why playing it "safe" often creates more distance over time. If you want to feel more secure, emotionally connected, and truly on the same team, this conversation will bring clarity to tangible ways to be more transparent and create emotional safety. ➡️ If you're ready to take the next step in building your connection. We have two main resources to support you. One of two 30-Day Couples Challenges: The level 1 - Prioritizing Us for daily connection The level 2 - Rebuilding Us for daily trust repairing and rebuilding
#433
February 3 · 29 min
How to Handle Stress So it Doesn't Negatively Impact Your Marriage: Episode 433
Stress is unavoidable. Between the state of the world, work demands, parenting, and the pressure to keep everything running, most couples are carrying more than they realize. The problem isn't stress itself, it's how easily it spills into your marriage. When stress goes unmanaged, it shows up as tension, miscommunication, defensiveness, and feeling like you're constantly behind or letting each other down. And suddenly, the relationship that should feel like support starts to feel like another source of pressure. In this episode, we talk about how stress moves through your life and into your relationship—and what to do before it quietly erodes connection. You'll learn how to create more margin, emotional awareness, and intentional connection so stress doesn't run your interactions or your home. Because when your marriage is supported, everything else in life—parenting, work, and decision-making—becomes lighter and more sustainable. If you want to protect your relationship from getting pushed to the bottom of the list, join our 30-Day "Prioritizing Us" Couples Challenge⭐️. It's designed to help couples stay connected and proactive during busy, stressful seasons through small daily actions that strengthen your foundation. Start the next round for Valentines Day at mycoupleschallenge.com 👈 Relationship Resources: See our top resources from guides, challenges, in-person events, and coaching here - meetthefreemans.com/links
#432
January 29 · 46 min
Why Intimacy Can't Be Deepened Without Inner Healing with Stefanos Sifandos: Episode 432
So many couples are trying to fix intimacy by focusing on communication tools, date nights, or changing their partner's behavior—yet still feel disconnected. In this episode, we sit down with relationship educator and behavioral scientist Stefanos Sifandos to talk about why intimacy can't truly deepen without inner healing first. Stefanos shares his own journey and breaks down a powerful framework from his new book, Tuned In and Turned On, explaining how unresolved shame, avoidance, and nervous-system patterns quietly block emotional and physical closeness. We explore why romantic relationships are often the place where our deepest wounds surface—and why they're also one of the greatest opportunities for growth, healing, and transformation. Together, we walk through the three phases Stefanos teaches—inner healing, relational healing, and sacred union—and what each one looks like in real life. This conversation is especially meaningful for couples who love each other, want more intimacy, and sense that something deeper is being asked of them—personally and relationally. In this episode, we discuss: Why intimacy can't be repaired without personal responsibility and inner work How shame, avoidance, and self-protection show up in long-term relationships What relational healing actually looks like beyond "better communication" How inner healing opens the door to deeper connection, intimacy, and spiritual alignment If you've ever felt stuck between wanting closeness and feeling shut down—or wondered why intimacy feels harder than it used to—this episode will help you understand what's really going on and where to begin. Listen in and let this conversation challenge the way you think about intimacy, healing, and growth in your relationship. Then order Tuned In and Turned On now and get $380 worth of bonuses – how to have better sex & intimacy masterclass, breathwork and meditation course, practical wisdom ebook, and reverse interview with Stefanos🎉

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