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Midlife with Brooke

Brooke Oniki

Midlife with Brooke – All Things Relationship, Health and Emotional Well-being is the go-to podcast for women of faith navigating the messy, beautiful middle years. With gospel-centered tools, real-life stories, and a whole lot of heart, Brooke helps you strengthen your relationship with God, reconnect with yourself, and love your people better—without losing your mind.

If you're ready for more peace, less anxiety, and practical ways to show up with purpose, you’re in the right place.

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S1 · E68
Monday · 29 min
Lessons From the Men I Teach at the Utah State Prison
Five things I've learned working in the Utah State Prison: People are good. Treating people with respect, even when their problems seem small compared to what they're facing, opens the door to real connection. We are not our worst mistake. That mistake is part of our story, but it doesn't have to define who we are. Extending grace to others helps us move toward our own healing. The inmates who let go of anger toward their parents seem to move forward more easily. We always have the power to choose. Kindness, our language, whether we fight. We don't have to wait for some future date to start living what we value. Real change is about you and your relationship with God, not about convincing other people you've changed. Lasting change comes from wanting to be different, not from proving it to someone else. Also mentioned: Join Brooke for a live in person class on nervous system regulation, Thursday, September 10th at the South Jordan Community Center. $25. You can learn more about it and sign up here: https://brookeoniki.com/emotional-regulation-workshop/
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S1 · E67
August 18 · 21 min
The Mother-in-Law Series: When it's Hard
The Mother-in-Law Series: When It's Hard This is the last episode in my five part series on being a mother-in-law. If you've listened to the other four and felt a wince here or there, this one is for you. Even if things have been hard for a long time, it isn't too late to change. We can't change our daughter-in-law or son-in-law. The only thing we can really work on is ourselves. Here are five places to start. 1. Process your own emotions. Disappointment and hurt don't go away just because we push them aside. Sit with the feeling, journal about it, pray about it. Let yourself actually feel it so it can move through you instead of getting stuck. 2. Revisit the story you're telling yourself. Our brain looks for evidence to prove whatever we already believe. If the story is "we never recovered," our brain will keep finding proof of that. We get to ask if that's still the story we want to tell. 3. Work on emotional regulation. Staying in a regulated nervous system lets us respond with curiosity instead of reacting out of hurt or fear. This is what allows us to stay consistent and warm even when a relationship feels hard. 4. Take an honest look in the mirror. Not to beat ourselves up, but to notice patterns we might not see otherwise. Are we easy to be around? Are we curious about her life? 5. Decide how you want to handle it. Some things we choose to let go of. Some are worth talking through, either directly or with a coach or neutral party first. Either way, check your motives. Are you trying to win, or trying to connect? Mentioned in this episode: Episode 6, "When the Story Hurts, Start With the Facts" Joseph Grenny's quote, Unprocessed emotions don't go away, they go to the basement and lift weights." Announcements: Local class on nervous system regulation, Thursday, September 10th, 7 to 9pm in South Jordan, Utah. $25. You can register at https://buy.stripe.com/5kQeVd7wsfZC4wXdYm2kw0M Retreat in Alta, September 17th through 19th. Brooke is the keynote speaker. $250. Email brooke@brookeoniki.com for details. Share this episode with someone who'd love it, and sign up for my newsletter at brookeoniki.com for more coaching on your relationships with your adult kids, your husband, and yourself.
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S1 · E66
August 10 · 21 min
Episode 65: Mother-in- law series: Creating New Traditions
The Mother-in-Law Series: New Traditions Welcome to week four of the Mother-in-Law Series. If you haven't caught the earlier episodes, go back and start with weddings. And if you're new here, one of the women I interviewed said something I keep coming back to: joining a family is like moving to another country. You don't know the customs, the language, or the traditions. So we get to decide, will we be the friendly local, or border control? This week is about new traditions, and why welcoming someone in means more than folding her into the way things have always been done. In this episode: Seeing a daughter-in-law's arrival as a gain instead of a loss, and how that shifts everything else The Christmas stocking and matching pajamas story: small effort, huge message A mother-in-law with only sons who started making Easter bonnets with her daughters-in-law Holding the purpose of a tradition tightly and the format loosely, including how our Christmas date, our vacations, and even our old scripture study tradition have evolved over the years Releasing the ledger: why things don't have to be even, and why scorekeeping adds stress instead of connection Honoring her family too, including a story about getting to know my son-in-law's family before he and my daughter moved to DC Brookefest, my own tradition of one-on-one time with each of my kids and their spouses, and other ideas for building a relationship that's just between the two of you My question for you this week: what tradition might you need to bend to be more accommodating, and what new one could you start? Next week is the final episode in this series, and it's for anyone whose relationship already feels hard. If that's you, don't miss it. Share this episode with someone who'd love it, and sign up for my newsletter at brookeoniki.com for more coaching on your relationships with your adult kids, your husband, and yourself.
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S1 · E65
August 3 · 23 min
Episode 64: Mother-in-law Series: Service that Helps
The Mother-in-Law Series: Service That Actually Helps Midlife with Brooke, Episode 3 of 5 We are back for week three of the mother-in-law series. We started with weddings, then talked about being the fun aunt instead of another mother. This week is all about service, the kind that actually helps and the kind that (even with the best intentions) can create distance instead of connection. As I was preparing for this episode I interviewed women in their late 20s to early 30s about their mother-in-law relationships, and their stories shaped everything we talk about today. One line has stuck with me through this whole series: joining a new family is like moving to another country. As the mother-in-law we get to decide if we are the friendly local who helps someone acclimate, or border control. In this episode One size doesn't fit all. My mom used to come over and immediately start doing dishes and laundry, asking me where everything went, and my anxiety would spike every time. My sisters loved that same instinct in her. Same mom, same desire to serve, completely different reactions. Help is not received as intended. It is received as it is interpreted. Be mindful about your reasons for helping. I share a story about a client whose daughter in law kept a messy house. She would clean every time she visited, only to come back to a mess again. Eventually we realized the real question was not "how do I get her to keep it clean," it was "am I serving her, or am I trying to make her into someone more comfortable for me." Believe them. If she tells you she does not need help in the kitchen, believe her. If your kids ask you to scale back on Christmas gifts, believe them too. I talk about my own tendency to overbuy and why that usually comes from scarcity, not love. Tell the truth back. Believing them goes both directions. I share a recent moment with my son, where being honest about what would actually help me (instead of just saying yes to watching my granddaughter) built more trust, not less. Do some quiet noticing. Filling up a gas tank. Washing the suitcase full of dirty clothes before the grandkids go home. A text that says "you're doing such a great job." These small, unrequested things often land more than the grand gestures. Honor her boundaries, even the ones that do not make sense to you. I tell the story of a friend who babysits her grandkids full time and gets a long list of rules from her daughter. Her response: if you want a daycare provider, hire one, but I am the grandma, and sometimes we are going to have ice cream for breakfast. Boundaries take honesty on both sides, and they take a regulated nervous system to talk through well. A question to sit with What is one thing I could quietly notice this month to support my daughter in law? Recap One size doesn't fit all Be mindful about your reasons for helping Believe them Be honest when they ask your true feelings Do some quiet noticing Honor boundaries and communicate with love Connect with Brooke Join my newsletter at www.brookeoniki.com/sign-up/
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S1 · E64
July 27 · 24 min
Episode 63: The Mother-in-Law Series: Becoming the Fun Aunt
This is week two of a five part series on our relationship with our daughters-in-law. Last week we talked about weddings. If you missed it, you can go back and listen to that one too! This week is about a shift in how we think about our role. One of my daughters told me an idea that really resonated with me. She said a daughter-in-law isn't looking for another mother. She already has one. What she's looking for is more like a fun aunt. Someone who's interested in her, who enjoys her company, who doesn't carry any expectations. I talk about what that actually looks like. What it means to step back from being the expert on our sons, even when we genuinely think our experience could help. I share a story a friend told me about trying to pass on everything she'd learned about her son's struggles to his new wife, and how that landed differently than she expected. We also get into some real, practical ideas. Texts that feel like support instead of pressure. Small gestures that say I see you as your own person. And a few sweet stories from the young women I interviewed. If you want weekly thoughts like this sent straight to your inbox, head to brookeoniki.com and join my newsletter. It's called Real Moms, Real Talk, and I'd love to have you there.
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S1 · E63
July 20 · 22 min
Episode 62: The Mother-in-Law Series: It Starts at the Wedding
Welcome to the first episode of my Mother-in-Law Series. In preparation, I interviewed women in their mid 20s to early 30s about their mothers-in-law, and one of them said something profound: joining a new family is like moving to another country. You don't know the customs or the language. So we (as the mothers-in-law) get to decide, will I be a friendly local or border control? In this 5 episode series, we're starting with weddings, because that's often where this relationship begins, and where hurt feelings can begin too. I share my own wedding regret: I tried so hard not to burden my mom that she ended up feeling left out, and it took us years to talk about it. In this episode: Why there's pain on both sides of wedding planning, and why it's usually a communication gap, not a character flaw Taking care of your own emotional needs first so you're not easily derailed A client's mid-wedding turnaround, and the question that changed her day: who do I want to be in this relationship? You're not the first family anymore. If you want to work on a marriage, work on the one you're in. Grace from every angle, including for the bride whose brain isn't fully done cooking yet Every wedding is different: ask, then believe the answers If a past wedding still stings, stick with me. Episode 5 of this series is for you. Free Resources: Visit www.brookeoniki.com and click "Free Resources" for short videos on how to stop spiraling thoughts, how to reconnect after a hard interaction with your child, and how to calm an elevated nervous system. A new Bridges group just started! Learn more about group coaching, or book a consult call to explore private coaching, at www.brookeoniki.com . Click the "Work with Me" tab!
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S1 · E62
July 13 · 32 min
Episode 61: Good News! Thoughts are Optional!
Two inmates. The same caseworker. One thinks she's amazing; the other thinks she shouldn't even have a job. So which is it? In this episode, I share stories from my coaching classes at the Utah State Prison that perfectly illustrate one of the most foundational principles in coaching: our thoughts — not our circumstances — create our feelings. The same sentencing, the same caseworker, the same camping trip, the same child, the same bank account can produce completely different emotional experiences depending on the thoughts we choose to have about them. But here's what this episode is not about: rushing to swap your thought for a shinier one. Before we ever change a thought, we need awareness of what our current thoughts are creating for us — in our relationships, our identity, and the meaning we give to our lives. In this episode, you'll learn: Why circumstances (a sentencing, a caseworker, a "difficult" child) are neutral until we have a thought about them The important caveat: thoughts create feelings in a regulated nervous system — and why we need to calm down before we can access our adult brain Why "thoughts are optional" doesn't mean lying to yourself or pretending everything is rainbows and daisies How our thoughts become self-fulfilling prophecies — like the mom who was grumpy with her "grumpy" daughter How thoughts confirm our existing beliefs, so our brain only gathers evidence for what we already think The three areas where heavy thoughts do the most damage: our relationships, our identity stories ("it's too late for me to change"), and the meaning we load onto circumstances Why sitting with a thought — on paper or in prayer — is where the transformation actually begins Your invitation this week: pick one relationship that isn't going well and ask yourself, "What are my predominant thoughts about this person, and how do those thoughts make me feel? Is that how I want to feel toward them?" Resources mentioned: Free Resources: Visit www.brookeoniki.com and click "Free Resources" for short videos on how to stop spiraling thoughts, how to reconnect after a hard interaction with your child, and how to calm an elevated nervous system. A new Bridges group just started! Learn more about group coaching, or book a consult call to explore private coaching, at www.brookeoniki.com . Click the "Work with Me" tab! Join the Newsletter: https://landing.mailerlite.com/webforms/landing/f7o6w8
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S1 · E61
July 6 · 20 min
Episode 60: Consider What You're Considering-A Lesson from King Mosiah
Consider What You're Considering: A Lesson from King Mosiah When King Mosiah's people wanted a new king, he gave them counsel that applies to every decision we make in our families today: "I desire that ye should consider the cause which ye are called to consider" (Mosiah 29:5). In other words — consider what you're considering. In this episode, I share how a family home evening lesson from my dad (and a high school prank gone very wrong) taught my kids this principle, and how it applies to the everyday choices we make in our relationships. Whether it's venting to one family member about another, rescuing our kids from every financial bind, or keeping secrets to "hold the peace," our choices are always creating something — and it's worth asking what. In this episode, you'll learn: The powerful question to ask before any decision: "If I made this same choice 100 times, what would it build?" How to identify what you're really seeking when you want something (validation? relief? an ally? security?) Why choices that feel good in the moment can create patterns that damage our closest relationships The story of how my thought "he's mad at me" was creating resentment in my own marriage — and how I changed it A simple three-part framework for considering what you're considering: Look in — What am I wanting to feel? Look forward — What am I creating? Look outward — Who is this affecting? This tool isn't meant to create guilt or shame — it's meant to build awareness. You can get validation, relief, and connection in ways that don't come at the expense of the people you love. Free Resources: Visit www.brookeoniki.com and click "Free Resources" for short videos on how to stop spiraling thoughts, how to reconnect after a hard interaction with your child, and how to calm an elevated nervous system. Join the Newsletter: https://landing.mailerlite.com/webforms/landing/f7o6w8
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S1 · E60
June 29 · 54 min
Episode 59: Understanding Gen Z: What Every Parent Needs to Know, A conversation with Maggon Osmond
What makes Gen Z tick — and why does it feel so hard to connect with them? In this episode, Brooke sits down with Maggon Osmond, owner of Kindness Matters Education, who has spent 20 years working with teens and young adults. Maggon brings a warm, practical perspective to one of the most common struggles her clients face: understanding the generation they're raising. Maggon works with businesses to help them support and retain their Gen Z workforce, and the lessons translate powerfully into family life. Whether your child is 17 or 32, this conversation will help you understand why they see the world so differently — and what you can actually do about it. In this episode, you'll learn: A quick breakdown of each generation and what shaped them Why COVID-19 fundamentally changed how Gen Z sees rules, systems, and the future The 8 core fears Gen Z carries into workplaces — and into your home Why constant digital connection amplifies anxiety and makes conflict harder to resolve What "building the dock" means and how to create a safe counterculture in your home The high love + high expectation framework and why both halves are non-negotiable How your role shifts when your kids become adults — and what it looks like to be their encourager instead of their manager Why fear-based parenting masquerades as control, and how to choose faith instead Key quote from this episode: "If we thought of this world as a classroom, not a courtroom, we would do ourselves a lot of good in every aspect of our lives." — Megan Osman Connect with Maggon Osmond: Kindness Matters EDU Join the Newsletter: https://landing.mailerlite.com/webforms/landing/f7o6w8 Learn More Book a free session, read the blog, get more free content at: www.brookeoniki.com
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S1 · E59
June 23 · 21 min
Episode 58: B-Minus Work: Why Good Enough Is Better Than Perfect
Have you ever put off cleaning your bathrooms because you didn't have time for a deep clean? Or held back a creative project because it wasn't quite ready? Or avoided a hard conversation because the timing wasn't perfect? That's perfectionism in disguise and it's keeping you stuck. In this episode, Brooke introduces one of her favorite concepts: B-minus work. A B-minus is a passing grade, and it turns out that consistently doing good enough is almost always more effective than waiting for perfect conditions that rarely arrive. In this episode Brooke covers: What B-minus work is and why it's not the same as settling How perfectionism is really a form of self-protection and avoidance Why consistency over time beats occasional perfection every single time How B-minus work shows up in creativity, mental health, cleaning, scripture study, parenting, relationships, and health The 80/20 principle applied to eating and movement When A-plus work actually is required — and why most of life isn't that The garden story that perfectly illustrates why imperfect action beats perfect inaction Key takeaway: 20 minutes of cleaning is infinitely better than zero minutes. An imperfect apology repairs more than the perfect conversation you never have. A B-minus podcast published every week builds more trust than a perfect one that never comes out. Done beats perfect. Every time. Stay Connected With Brooke Get weekly encouragement, emotional wellness tools, and podcast extras: Join the Newsletter: https://landing.mailerlite.com/webforms/landing/f7o6w8 Learn More Book a free session, read the blog, get more free content at: www.brookeoniki.com
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S1 · E58
June 15 · 22 min
Episode 57: When Helping Isn't Helping
When Helping Isn't Helping Brooke Oniki Life Coaching Podcast My husband was making cookies. He's done it dozens of times. And I still couldn't keep my mouth shut about the butter. That moment introduced me — again — to a concept from leadership researcher Liz Wiseman: the difference between multipliers and diminishers. Wiseman was studying corporations. But she was describing our families. In this episode we talk about the gatekeeper's paradox, the most dangerous quadrant of love, and the difference between love that grows people and love that simply keeps them safe. Plus a Larry Wilson quote from the April 2012 General Conference that I have never been able to shake. The question this episode asks is simple. The answer is harder: does your presence make the people around you more — or less? Quote of the Episode "Compulsion builds resentment. It conveys mistrust, and it makes people feel incompetent. Learning opportunities are lost when controlling persons pridefully assume they have all the right answers for others." — Elder Larry Wilson, April 2012 General Conference Resources Mentioned Multipliers by Liz Wiseman Diana Baumrind's four quadrants of parenting Elder Larry Wilson, April 2012 General Conference Stay Connected With Brooke Get weekly encouragement, emotional wellness tools, and podcast extras: Join the Newsletter: https://landing.mailerlite.com/webforms/landing/f7o6w8 Learn More Book a free session, read the blog, get more free content at: www.brookeoniki.com
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S1 · E57
June 8 · 17 min
Episode 56: Breathe Into the Stretch: Learning to Stay Present in Uncomfortable Relationships
We live in a world designed for comfort — same-day delivery, instant answers, and climate-controlled rooms. But what happens when that instinct for ease bleeds into our most important relationships? In this episode, Brooke explores what it means to expand your zone of relational discomfort and why staying in the hard moments might be the most loving thing you can do. Drawing on a yoga metaphor that will stick with you, Brooke unpacks what it looks like to "breathe into the stretch" — not just on the mat, but in the conversations you've been avoiding, the friendships you've been pulling back from, and the moments with your kids where your instinct is to fix, escape, or shut down. In this episode, you'll hear: Why our brains are wired to run from relational discomfort — and why running is costing us more than we realize The difference between protecting your child and protecting yourself from watching them hurt A powerful coaching example about a woman who kept hanging up on her sister — and what happened when she was challenged to stay on the line Brooke's personal story about her son Connor's devastating basketball season, and the quiet message that steady, ordinary love sends Her cousin Julie's experience navigating grief after losing her husband — and the profound truth that we can't take someone else's pain away Practical tools to expand your zone of discomfort: Notice the urge before you act on it Use your breath — slow it down Ask one more question before you react Look for the grain of truth in what stings most Show up the morning after — love them the same, let the sun rise Discomfort in a relationship isn't a sign something is wrong. It's often a sign something real is happening — something worth staying for. Stay Connected With Brooke Get weekly encouragement, emotional wellness tools, and podcast extras: Join the Newsletter: https://landing.mailerlite.com/webforms/landing/f7o6w8 Learn More Book a free session, read the blog, get more free content at: www.brookeoniki.com
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S1 · E56
June 1 · 38 min
Episode 55: The Power of Knowing Someone's Story-Supporting your LGBTQ Loved One
What does it look like to love someone when their path unfolds differently than you expected? In this heartfelt conversation, Brooke sits down with Sandra Rhees and her son Jeremy to talk about their family's experience navigating faith, family relationships, and Jeremy's journey as a gay, active member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Jeremy shares his experience of recognizing he was different, coming out to his family and friends, and learning to reconcile his faith with his sexual orientation. Sandra offers a parent's perspective on adjusting expectations, building trust, and choosing connection over fear. Together, they discuss: Jeremy's journey of discovering he was gay How his parents responded when he came out The importance of trust in parent-child relationships Navigating faith when questions don't have easy answers Experiences with church leaders and serving a mission Ways friends, family members, and ward members can create a greater sense of belonging Why curiosity and understanding matter more than assumptions How open communication develops over time Extending grace to ourselves and others as we learn One of the most powerful themes throughout this conversation is the importance of truly getting to know people. When we take time to hear someone's story, labels become less important and relationships become stronger. Whether you have an LGBTQ family member, friend, neighbor, or ward member—or simply want to become a more compassionate disciple of Christ—this episode offers thoughtful insights about love, trust, and human connection. Key Takeaways Trust creates safety for honest conversations. Understanding grows when we ask questions and listen. People are more than a single label or characteristic. Grace allows relationships to flourish even when perspectives differ. Christlike love begins with seeing people as individuals and learning their stories. Resources Mentioned Questions From The Closet podcast Charlie Bird Jared Halverson Stay Connected With Brooke Get weekly encouragement, emotional wellness tools, and podcast extras: Join the Newsletter: https://landing.mailerlite.com/webforms/landing/f7o6w8 Learn More Book a free session, read the blog, get more free content at: www.brookeoniki.com
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S1 · E55
May 22 · 13 min
Episode 54: Three Tips for Family Reunions, Vacations and Gatherings
Family reunions. Holidays. Summer trips. Long weekends with adult children, in-laws, and extended family. Sometimes they’re full of connection and joy. Sometimes they come with stress, hurt feelings, unmet expectations, or that one conversation that catches you off guard. In today’s episode, I’m sharing three simple tools to help you show up differently at family gatherings this summer. Instead of trying to manage everyone else, we’ll talk about how to manage you. Because when you feel more grounded, everything changes. In this episode we discuss: Why regulating your nervous system matters more than managing the event A story about a mother who thought criticism was coming—but discovered connection instead How “manuals” (unspoken expectations) create frustration at family events The birthday cake story and what it teaches us about curiosity and compassion Why curiosity often works better than control How deciding who you want to be before you arrive can completely change your experience Simple ways to stay connected, grounded, and present during summer gatherings Questions to consider before your next gathering: What tends to activate me? How will I care for myself if that happens? What expectations am I carrying? Who do I want to be when I walk into the room? You don’t need a perfect family gathering to create a meaningful one. Sometimes the win is simply this: I showed up as the person I wanted to be. If you’re heading into a family reunion, wedding, vacation, or difficult conversation this summer and want a little extra support, Brooke also shares an invitation for short-term coaching sessions to help you prepare and feel more grounded. Listen in and let’s make this summer feel a little lighter, calmer, and more connected. Stay Connected With Brooke Get weekly encouragement, emotional wellness tools, and podcast extras: Join the Newsletter: https://landing.mailerlite.com/webforms/landing/f7o6w8 Learn More Book a free session, read the blog, get more free content at: www.brookeoniki.com
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S1 · E54
May 18 · 19 min
Episode 53: The Hidden Reason You Don’t Feel Like Starting
Today we’re talking about a fascinating concept: our brains resist state changes. When we’re sitting, we don’t want to stand. When we’re home, we don’t want to leave. When we finally start cleaning, we suddenly don’t want to stop. This isn’t because you’re lazy or unmotivated. Our brains love familiarity, efficiency, and conserving energy. In this episode we discuss: • Why transitions feel hard • Why resistance doesn’t mean something is wrong • How momentum creates motivation • Simple hacks to help you move through resistance • Why accountability and community help us follow through We’ll talk about real-life examples like exercise, cleaning, bedtime routines, procrastination, and even recording podcasts. Questions to think about this week: Where are you interpreting normal resistance as a problem? What if resistance isn’t evidence that you shouldn’t do something but simply evidence that you’re changing states? If this episode helps you, share it with a friend. I’m so grateful you’re here and part of this community! Stay Connected With Brooke Get weekly encouragement, emotional wellness tools, and podcast extras: Join the Newsletter: https://landing.mailerlite.com/webforms/landing/f7o6w8 Learn More Coaching, resources, and offerings for midlife women: www.brookeoniki.com
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S1 · E53
May 11 · 51 min
Episode 52: Three Coaches. Three Powerful Relationship Shifts
Today’s episode is a special conversation with two fellow relationship coaches, and . Together, we talk about some of the most powerful tools we use with clients to create healthier, more connected relationships. We discuss: Why black-and-white thinking creates disconnection How curiosity softens judgment What nervous system regulation has to do with communication Why defensiveness makes hard conversations harder How to stay grounded when emotions run high The difference between supporting someone and trying to control them Why personal responsibility changes relationships How to create emotional safety with spouses, adult children, and loved ones This conversation is full of practical examples, honest experiences, and tools you can begin practicing right away. One of my favorite reminders from this episode: You don’t have to agree with someone to stay connected to them. We also talk about: The “zone of resilience” Moving from judgment to curiosity Allowing others to be fully human Why repair matters more than perfection The lifelong work of emotional growth If you’ve ever felt stuck in conflict, overwhelmed by feedback, or unsure how to navigate difficult relationships with more peace and steadiness, this episode will give you plenty to think about. I’d love to hear what resonated most with you. Send me a message or share this episode with a friend who might need it today. You can reach Tanya Hale at: www.tanyahale.com You can reach Jane Copier at: www.jane-copier.com Learn More Coaching, resources, and upcoming offerings: www.brookeoniki.com Share the Episode If this episode helped you, share it with a friend who might need it too.
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S1 · E52
May 5 · 41 min
Episode 51: Seven Ways to Have a Better Mother’s Day
Mother’s Day can bring up a wide range of emotions—joy, gratitude, disappointment, even resentment. Wherever you find yourself on that spectrum, this episode offers a thoughtful and empowering way to approach the day differently. In this episode, I share 7 practical ideas to help you create a Mother’s Day that feels meaningful and enjoyable to you—without relying on anyone else to get it “just right.” We’ll talk about: Why thinking of it as “Mothering Sunday” can shift everything How to reflect on the people who have “mothered” you throughout your life Why motherhood may have transformed you more than anyone else How to take ownership of your day instead of waiting to be celebrated The value of acknowledging both your “highs” and “lows” as a mom How gratitude and intentional connection can change your experience Why it’s okay to feel disappointed—and what to do with that Letting go of comparison and learning to be yourself fully as a mother You’ll walk away with a new perspective on Mother’s Day—one that allows for more peace, more intention, and more joy, no matter what your circumstances look like. If you’ve ever felt let down, overlooked, or unsure how to feel on Mother’s Day, this episode will give you tools to support yourself and create a day that reflects what you truly want. Stay Connected With Brooke Get weekly encouragement, emotional wellness tools, and podcast extras: Join the Newsletter. This will give you information for "Six Months to Strong." https://landing.mailerlite.com/webforms/landing/f7o6w8 Learn More Book a free coaching consultations, get free resources, and offerings for midlife women: www.brookeoniki.com
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S1 · E51
April 27 · 53 min
Episode 50: Staying Close When Beliefs Change: A Conversation with Tucker Boyle
In this episode, I’m joined by Tucker Boyle for a beautiful and honest conversation about faith journeys, faith crisis, and how to stay connected to the people we love when their beliefs begin to shift. Tucker shares his own experience of moving through a difficult faith crisis while serving as a seminary teacher and church leader, and how that journey helped him understand faith, questions, nervous system regulation, and Jesus in a deeper way. We talk about what often happens inside parents when a child shares doubts or steps away from the faith tradition they were raised in. Fear can rise quickly, and when our nervous system goes into fight, flight, or shutdown, it becomes much harder to respond with curiosity, compassion, and love. Tucker offers such wise insight on how to create safety in these conversations, how to repair when we respond from fear, and why our relationship with our children does not have to be dependent on believing the same things. We also talk about: How faith can change and mature over time Why questions are not a threat to God What young adults often need when they share a faith struggle How parents can regulate their own fear before responding Why “at least stay close to Jesus” may not land the way we hope How to build connection in new ways when religious intimacy changes How Jesus can still be present in every stage of the journey This conversation is tender, thoughtful, and full of hope. Whether you are navigating your own faith questions or loving someone who is, I think you’ll find comfort and guidance here. Resources Mentioned You can learn more about Tucker at: Harmony Road Retreats: harmonyroadretreats.com Tucker Boyle: tuckerboyle.com CTA If this episode helped you, I’d love for you to share it with a friend who may need a little more peace and hope in their relationships right now. If you want to join me in "Six Months to Strong" join my newsletter to learn all about it! Join the Newsletter: https://landing.mailerlite.com/webforms/landing/f7o6w8
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S1 · E50
April 20 · 1 hr 11 min
Episode 49: What Comes Next? Learning to Trust Yourself in Midlife-A Conversation with Kolette Hall
What do you do when life doesn’t turn out the way you expected? Whether you're navigating loss, preparing for an empty nest, or simply wondering “what’s next for me?”—this conversation will meet you right where you are. In this episode, I sit down with life coach Kolette Hall, who shares her powerful story of becoming a young widow, raising her son, and learning—again and again—how to move forward without having the whole plan. Together, we explore what it really means to trust yourself, how to recognize God’s guidance in your life, and why you don’t need clarity about the future to take your next step. This is a conversation about identity, grief, growth, and possibility—and how to create a life you love, even when it looks different than you imagined. What You’ll Learn: Why you don’t need to know the full plan to move forward How to trust your “inner knowing” (even if you’ve doubted it before) The difference between a “red light” and a “green light” in decision-making A powerful way to process grief without judgment How to support others who are grieving (without saying the wrong thing) Why your past decisions weren’t mistakes—even if they were hard How to begin creating what’s next in your life with confidence Key Takeaways: You can trust the step you took—and still choose a new step now Growth often comes through the hard things, not in spite of them You are allowed to want something new, even in midlife God’s guidance is often quiet, simple, and already present You don’t need certainty—you just need willingness A Simple Practice to Try: Start noticing your “red lights” and “green lights” in small, everyday decisions—what to wear, what to say yes to, what to pause on. The more you practice, the more you’ll begin to trust yourself. Stay Connected With Brooke Get weekly encouragement, emotional wellness tools, and podcast extras: Join the Newsletter: https://landing.mailerlite.com/webforms/landing/f7o6w8 Learn More Book a free coaching consultations, get free resources, and offerings for midlife women: www.brookeoniki.com
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S1 · E49
April 13 · 22 min
Episode 48: Why Accepting Reality Brings More Peace (Even When It’s Hard)
In this episode of Midlife with Brooke, we talk about a simple idea that can feel surprisingly hard to live: accepting reality. So often, we don’t realize we’re resisting what’s actually happening. We think we’re just seeing things clearly… but underneath it, there’s a quiet argument with reality: This shouldn’t be happening. They shouldn’t have done that. It was supposed to be different. That resistance adds a layer of suffering that keeps us stuck. Brooke introduces the powerful concept of clean pain vs. dirty pain: Clean pain is the honest, human emotion that comes with hard experiences—grief, disappointment, sadness. Dirty pain is what we add on top—blame, regret, judgment, and the belief that things shouldn’t be the way they are. Through personal stories and real-life examples, you’ll hear how this shows up in: Relationships with adult children Marriage and unmet expectations Health challenges and setbacks Parenting decisions you don’t agree with When you learn to separate facts from the stories your mind creates, everything begins to shift. Acceptance doesn’t mean you like what’s happening. It doesn’t mean you approve or give up. It simply means you’re willing to say: “This is what’s happening right now.” And from that place, you can think more clearly, feel more grounded, and decide how you want to move forward. 💡 In This Episode, You’ll Learn: The difference between clean pain and dirty pain How resisting reality creates more suffering Why your nervous system matters in acceptance How to separate facts from the stories you’re telling Simple ways to move from stuck → steady ❤️ Questions to Reflect On: Where am I adding suffering to something that’s already hard? What am I resisting right now? What would it look like to feel the pain… without adding more on top? Stay Connected With Brooke Get weekly encouragement, emotional wellness tools, and podcast extras: Join the Newsletter: https://landing.mailerlite.com/webforms/landing/f7o6w8 Learn More Book a free coaching consultations, get free resources, and offerings for midlife women: www.brookeoniki.com
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