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Stop Low-balling Your Donors: How to Confidently Ask for the Right Amount

Oct 4, 2025 · 18 min · 9.2 MB
0:00-18:59

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Ready to pour rocket fuel on your major gift efforts? Major Gift Momentum is the solution. Check it out here!

Today we’re tackling one of the most common (and costly) mistakes I see major gift officers make: lowballing the ask.

If you’ve ever walked out of a donor meeting wondering if you should’ve asked for more—or felt afraid to offend a donor by going too big—this episode is your wake-up call. Because here’s the truth: donors aren’t offended by bold asks… they’re confused by vague ones.

We’ll unpack why fundraisers undershoot, how to calculate the right amount with confidence, and how to deliver your ask in a way that feels natural, strategic, and unapologetically bold.

In This Episode, You’ll Learn:

  • Why “playing it safe” with smaller asks is actually hurting your organization (and your donors).
  • The four biggest reasons fundraisers lowball their asks — and how to fix them.
  • The real cost of under-soliciting (hint: it’s not just lost revenue).
  • The confidence formula for determining the right ask amount using capacity, affinity, and readiness.
  • How to deliver your ask with precision — using specific numbers, clear impact, and confident tone.
  • What to say (and what not to say) when presenting different giving options.
  • The four-question Confidence Checklist to know you’re ready to make the right ask.

🪑 The Small Table Intensive. Half a day. Build or rebuild your major gift program around fewer donors and deeper relationships, using the methodology from my book Small Table Big Philanthropy.

🎯 The Ask Workshop. Half a day. The exact words to use when it's time to ask for 5 and 6-figure gifts. Walk in nervous about the ask. Walk out with the script.

More from Mary:

📘 Mary's books. What to Say and Small Table Big Philanthropy. The books behind the methodology.

🔥 Major Donor Meeting Mastery. My step-by-step system for donor meetings that move the relationship forward.

👩🏻‍💻 Momentum Training. My complete packaging + ask system, all in one place.

💻 Connect with Mary Petersen