Food Addicts In Recovery Anonymous

Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous

Free talks about recovery from food addiction. More information at: https://www.foodaddicts.org.

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#156
August 5 · 25 min
137. The Two-Lunch Kid
I don’t remember ever having an easy relationship with food. Food was my comfort, my reward, and my hiding place. I was a middle child with three brothers, and I was the only one who couldn’t escape a problem with food and weight. As soon as I could ride a bike, I headed straight to the corner store for food. As a first grader, I figured out how to use my allowance money to buy two school lunches, and as a teen with my first paycheck and a driver’s license, my car became what I called my “mobile eating unit.” At college, with unlimited food plans in both the cafeteria and my fraternity house, my freshman 15 expanded to a freshman 40. By 23, I was supposed to be living my best years, but at 310 pounds, my world was shrinking fast. I couldn’t walk up stairs without getting winded, and I avoided life whenever I could. Every night I promised myself I’d change; every morning I failed again. I first came to a Twelve-Step program in 1994, but it took years before I truly surrendered. Then, in 2007, my mortality was on the table. I was pre-diabetic with sleep apnea and on the cusp of needing blood pressure and cholesterol medications. Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA) became my lifeline. In FA, I found structure, accountability, and freedom. Through weighed and measured meals, sponsorship, and working the Twelve Steps, the obsession with food began to lift. I lost over 100 pounds, but more importantly, I found peace. FA didn’t just change the way I ate– it changed how I live, how I love, and how I show up in the world. Today, I live with gratitude, acceptance, and a sense of purpose; and I remain committed to this path, one day at a time.
#155
July 15 · 27 min
136. Cuando las Promesas se Vuelven Realidad
Esta grabación presenta la historia de una mujer nacida en San José, Costa Rica, miembro de Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA), que cuenta cómo una infancia llena de amor y abundancia de comida se transformó en una dolorosa adicción a la comida. Desde muy joven, la bulimia se convirtió en su anestesia para enfrentar el duelo por la muerte de su padre, la migración a Estados Unidos y las difíciles transiciones escolares en Florida. A lo largo de la adolescencia y la universidad, describe atracones, vómitos, vergüenza y una profunda dismorfia corporal, aun cuando otros veían en ella inteligencia y potencial. Su historia incluye servir en la Marina de los Estados Unidos, usar la comida, el alcohol y el exceso de ejercicio para intentar controlar el peso, y vivir relaciones en las que sentía que dependía económicamente de los demás. En Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA) encontró un camino distinto: una comunidad, una madrina y un plan de comida que le ofrecen estructura, esperanza y la posibilidad de descubrir quién es realmente, más allá de la adicción a la comida, donde las promesas del programa comienzan a hacerse realidad.
#154
July 1 · 28 min
135. Ein Bissen ist zu viel und 20 sind nicht genug
Ich entdeckte die Bulimie als Teenager. Zunächst schien sie die perfekte Lösung für all meine Probleme zu sein: Ich konnte unbegrenzt essen, ohne zuzunehmen – und dick werden wollte ich auf keinen Fall. Schon bald wurde der vermeintliche Freund Essen zu meinem Feind. Mir wurde klar, dass ein Bissen von Zucker- oder Mehlprodukten zu viel war und zwanzig niemals genug. Bevor ich zu Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous kam, rutschte ich ins Untergewicht ab. In FA nahm ich dann zu – mit dem Ergebnis, dass ich heute in einem gesunden, schlanken Körper lebe. Dafür bin ich seit vielen Jahren dankbar abstinent. One Bite Is Too Much and Twenty Are Never Enough I discovered bulimia as a teenager. At first, it seemed like the perfect solution to all my problems: I could eat without limits and not gain weight—and gaining weight was something I absolutely did not want. Before long, the friend I thought food was became my enemy. I realized that one bite of sugar or flour was too much, and twenty were never enough. Before coming to Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous, I slipped into being underweight. When I came to FA, I gained weight—and today, as a result, I live in a healthy, slender body. I am deeply grateful to have been abstinent for many years now.
#153
June 17 · 23 min
134. Wired Differently
I grew up with a young, single mom, and the early years at home were tumultuous. Finances were tight, and things often felt unstable. From a very young age, I could eat as much as my grandfather. There was no real connection between feeling full and stopping. I was a chubby kid, taller than my classmates, and became very aware of how I ate in front of others. I tried dieting, but I couldn’t stick to anything. I remember thinking, " Why lose weight if I’m just going to gain it back?” Even as a teenager, I sensed something deeper -- that I was dealing with a real condition. I attended my first Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA) meeting as a senior in high school. I heard food addiction described as a medical issue rather than a failure of willpower, like I had read in fashion magazines. That changed everything. When I began following the FA food plan with clear boundaries and structured meals, life started to shift. I experienced mental clarity, my anxiety began to ease, and I felt a sense of peace. After twenty-eight years in FA, the obsession is gone. Removing sugar and flour, along with using the tools of the program, has taken away that constant need to eat -- something no diet ever did. I felt supported through every stage of life, from weighing and measuring food in my college dorm to dating, marriage, and raising three children. The daily routine of recovery in FA is second nature now, and it has created space for me to grow into who I am. Today, I have a Higher Power, a beautiful community, and a full life. This is a “we” program. I don’t have to do this alone, and I no longer live in the struggle
#152
June 3 · 28 min
133. Outgrowing Gold Stars
I grew up in a tumultuous home where appearances mattered, and secrets were kept. I learned early how to look fine on the outside while hiding what was really going on – and that habit followed me straight into my food addiction. In school, I thrived. I was smart, the teacher’s pet, and loved gold stars and approval. Inside the classroom, I felt confident and included – even by the cool kids. Outside of it, I was deeply insecure and desperate to belong. From a young age, I could eat enormous portions. Food never shut off for me. By seventeen, I was over 200 pounds, swinging between extremes – exercising to the point of injury, fasting for weeks, or bingeing until I was in physical pain. When I came into Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA) eighteen years ago, I did what I knew how to do: I tried to look good – to my sponsor and my fellows. Then came my moment of truth. I was told that if I kept managing my image and hiding how I really felt, I would eat again. I heard the expression, “We’re only as sick as our secrets.” That realization changed everything. Today, honesty is the foundation of my recovery in FA. I’m maintaining a weight loss of more than 100 pounds, but what FA gives me goes far beyond neutrality with food. In FA, I have found balance and joy in my personal and professional life, and compassion as the primary caregiver for my aging mother. At sixty-one years old, I no longer seek constant approval or gold stars. Working this program, I am truly free from addictive eating and living a deeply satisfying life.
#151
May 20 · 30 min
132. In the Peace Corner
I was adopted at birth by two loving parents, and I had a beautiful childhood. But everything changed when I was bullied in middle school and started eating to cope. While my mother wanted to talk about feelings, my father would take me out to dinner, and food became my emotional anchor. I didn't notice the weight creeping on; it felt like I just woke up one day overweight. I even had medical conditions requiring me to avoid certain foods, but I couldn't stop eating them, no matter how hard I tried. High school brought some improvement through sports and socializing, but I also tried dangerous diet pills that sent me to the emergency room. I first heard about Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA) at 15, but I didn’t want anything to do with it until I hit my top weight of 185 pounds at 22 years old. I was so desperate and knew I needed help. My addiction went beyond food. I stole, cheated, and accumulated debt, all of which I believe were connected to being an addict. FA and the Twelve Steps changed everything. I became employable and got out of debt. FA supported me through pregnancies, postpartum challenges, cancer, surgeries, and the pandemic – all while staying abstinent. Today, I am a working artist, married, and raising two children, living an incredible life. I identify as gender-queer, and FA gave me the tools to show up fully as myself – authentic, confident, and free. I cook healthy food for my family, care for my body and mind, and embrace each day with joy, balance, and connection. I came to FA to change my relationship with food, but what I truly gained is the most extraordinary gift: the freedom to be exactly who I am.
#150
May 6 · 29 min
131. Essen ist auch eine Droge
Essen ist auch eine Droge Ich bin Mitglied bei Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA) und lebe mit einer Mehrfachsucht. Mein Weg in die Genesung begann nicht mit Essen – zunächst war ich in einem 12-Schritte-Programm für Drogensüchtige. Mit der Zeit wurde mir jedoch klar, dass Essen in meinem Leben die gleiche Funktion hatte wie Drogen. Es war nicht einfach Nahrung – es war meine Droge. Obwohl ich keine starken Gewichtsschwankungen hatte und oft als schlank galt, war mein Denken ständig vom Essen und der Kontrolle meines Gewichts bestimmt. Ich war ein ängstliches, gehemmtes Kind und habe in dieser Zeit viel verbale Gewalt erlebt. Essen wurde mein Rückzugsort, mein Trost. Viele Jahre lang habe ich mir mein Verhalten schöngeredet und verharmlost – obwohl ich Essen zwanghaft und wie eine Droge missbrauchte. Ich habe sehr darunter gelitten, auch wenn es nach außen kaum sichtbar war. Schließlich führte mich ein mehrtägiger Fressanfall an meinen Tiefpunkt – und direkt zu FA. Dieser Moment wurde zum Beginn meiner wirklichen Genesung. Heute bin ich zutiefst dankbar für die Klarheit, Ehrlichkeit und Freiheit, die mir dieses Programm geschenkt hat. Food Is Also a Drug I am a member of Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA), and I live with multiple addictions. My recovery journey did not begin with food—I first entered a 12-Step program for drug addiction. Over time, however, it became clear to me that food functioned in my life the same way drugs had. Food was not just food; it was my drug of choice. Although I did not experience extreme weight fluctuations and was often considered slim, my mind was constantly consumed by food and controlling my weight. From a young age, I was anxious, inhibited, and exposed to significant verbal aggression. Food became my refuge and my relief. I spent years minimizing and justifying my behavior—telling myself stories that made my eating seem harmless, even as I was using food compulsively and addictively. I suffered deeply, though much of it was hidden from the outside world. Eventually, a multi-day binge brought me to my breaking point—and into Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous. That moment marked the beginning of true recovery for me. Today, I am profoundly grateful for the clarity, honesty, and freedom this program has given me.
#147
April 15 · 30 min
130. Caring for the Caregiver
As the oldest child in my family, I learned to take on the responsibility of caring for others, setting my own needs aside. My father often rewarded me with fast food. In college, isolated from family, I walked a mile every night to restaurants seeking comfort. Even as I climbed the corporate ladder, I felt inadequate and continued using food to manage my anxiety. After my father's death, I put my mother first. For over a decade, I cared for her while frequenting every drive-thru near her assisted living facility. My adult life may have looked successful from the outside, but I continued struggling privately, and I used food to cope. After years of trying to manage on my own and reaching 224 pounds, I found Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA) and heard my own story reflected back to me. What I discovered wasn’t a failure of willpower, but an addiction that required help beyond myself. Through sponsorship, meetings, and the Twelve Steps, my obsession with food lifted, and the excess weight disappeared. Now, passing my 14th anniversary in FA, life still brings challenges, but I have a roadmap for navigating them. The structure of FA has given me more freedom than I ever had when eating whatever I wanted. One day at a time, I live in gratitude, thankful I accepted the opportunity to live in recovery rather than remain stuck in addiction.
#146
April 1 · 25 min
129. Borrowed Faith
I came into Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA) in 2019 at 193 pounds, 5'7", convinced I would be the one person the program wouldn’t work for. I didn’t even believe I was a food addict, just someone with a snacking problem. But my life told a different story. I grew up in Venezuela, waiting for my mother to leave the house so I could steal food from the cabinet and then throw the wrappers over the wall into the neighbor’s yard. I loved visiting my aunt, who had a central vacuum system, so I could eat sweets and then quickly discard the wrappers into the inlet valve hole in the wall. As an athletic teen, I became so obsessed with how I looked that I stopped eating, carried a calculator, and allowed myself no more than 300 calories a day. When I felt dizzy, seeing little sparkles of light, I thought that was a sure sign that I was losing weight. After many diets, and finding that starving myself wasn't sustainable, the pendulum swung to the other extreme, and I began consuming enormous amounts of food, bingeing until my sisters didn't recognize me. My back hurt. My joints hurt. I didn’t want anyone to see me, and I stopped showing up for my own life – avoiding plans, canceling commitments at the last minute, and feeling overwhelming guilt. I eventually lost my job, and food was my only way of coping. In a moment of desperation, I Googled “food addiction" and discovered FA. I found a meeting that was walking distance from my house that had been there for the past 20 years! I arrived feeling skeptical and broken, ready to argue. Instead, I borrowed my sponsor’s faith, I lost 60 pounds, and more than that, I lost the obsession with food. I learned that you don’t even have to believe that it works. You just have to do it – faith comes later.
#145
March 18 · 27 min
128. The Day It Finally Clicked
For most of my life, I never thought I had a food addiction. I believed my struggles with weight were simply the result of genetics and environment, a lottery I had lost. I came from a family where many people were larger, food was central to everything we did, and at 5’9”, I assumed my size was inevitable. For most of my adult life, I weighed over 300 pounds. Even as my health declined, my denial only deepened. That denial shattered in 2008. What I thought were slightly swollen ankles landed me in the hospital with heart failure. My heart rate climbed past 225 beats per minute. At 47 years old, paramedics chemically stopped my heart – twice – trying to reset it. In the back of that ambulance, I was terrified. At the hospital, I weighed in at 373 pounds. Still, I didn’t understand food addiction. I lost some weight by watching my sodium, but the obsession never left. In 2010, after being given a birthday cake and later eating the entire thing alone in a closet, I asked the universe for help, specifically for someone I could talk to about my food. Soon after, I was led to Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA). When I made the call, I finally heard that sugar and flour are addictive substances. At once, everything clicked – the mental obsession was paired with a physical craving. I joined FA on April 28, 2010, weighing 302 pounds, and I have lost over 150 pounds. With my doctor’s guidance, I’ve come off 18 different medications. I no longer need a cane, which I once relied on at age 49. I no longer have sleep apnea or high blood pressure. I restored my relationships and financial standing, and I’ve gained a life beyond anything I imagined. Today, I live with freedom, purpose, and gratitude, one day at a time.
#144
March 11 · 23 min
127. Perfect Track Record
Once I started eating, I couldn’t stop. I wasn’t a grazer – I was a binge eater. I ate in secret, whole packages at a time, with the door closed. When I came to Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA) at 20 years old, I was obese, deeply unhappy, and running out of hope. Today, at 58 years old and 85 pounds lighter, I have a blessed life in recovery. From age three, food lit me up like a Christmas tree. I remember being caught hiding behind a curtain at my parents' dinner party, secretly bingeing on dessert. My first diet was in sixth grade, and it began a pattern that lasted for years: intense excitement, a few days of success, and then the moment of insanity when I told myself I could have ‘just one bite.’ From there, I was off to the races My brother was born with a heart defect, and I could feel the stress that my loving parents experienced. When I was 13, a surgery meant to fix his heart went wrong, and he died. When we lost him, our beautiful family circle was broken, and so was I. I gained 30 pounds that year and spent the rest of high school dieting. College was one long binge, until I found FA. Today, I’m married, raising two college-aged children – one transgender, one autistic – and caring for elderly parents. Life is full, imperfect, and deeply meaningful. For over thirty-five years now, I've maintained my right-sized body by asking my Higher Power for help—not just with food, but with life itself. My Higher Power has a perfect track record: every time I surrender to God's will, I get to live a beautiful life.
#143
March 4 · 22 min
126. Coming Back: A Story of Relapse and Recovery
In my Italian American family, everything revolved around food. I ate when I was happy, sad, lonely, or scared – and most of the time I was all four. My mom didn't want me to have the struggles with weight that she always had, so whenever she joined a commercial weight loss program (and she joined them all), she would drag me with her. She meant well, but every new plan just made me feel more broken. She would pack me embarrassing diet lunches to bring to school that were quite different from what the other children were eating. On the outside, I smiled and kept dieting; on the inside, I binged in secret and drowned in shame. When I did lose weight, I'd immediately gain it back. I was 250 pounds when I graduated from high school. By the time I was thirty-one, I weighed 325, had diabetes, and hated myself. Fasting and starvation, alcohol, cocaine, pills, more diet programs – I tried it all to control my eating, but control was never the answer. On a sweltering August evening, I walked into my first Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA) meeting drenched in sweat, having tried to hide my body under a heavy raincoat. I was terrified – and desperate. That night, I heard the word “hope.” Recovery didn’t just change my body, it transformed my life. Then, after twelve years of abstinence, I got cocky. My addiction sneaked back in – and for the next two years, I returned to food, alcohol, and drugs. I was so ashamed and too proud to be honest with myself. Eventually, I returned to FA and got abstinent again. I found a new purpose, got married, retired from my job, and began volunteering with drug addicts. Today, at 66 years old, my weight has remained steady for several decades at about 130 pounds. I’m healthy, free, and grateful beyond measure.
#142
February 4 · 27 min
125. Decades Blessed
I’m an 80-year-old food addict, grateful to have been part of the Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA) fellowship for decades. I have lost more than 55 pounds, but far more importantly, I have gained a way of living that continues to sustain me. My childhood was shaped by alcoholism, abuse, and silence, followed by years of binge eating, denial, relapse, and shame. After getting sober in AA, I believed I was finally free – until I hit yet another bottom, alone in my car, surrounded by food wrappers. I tried mindful eating, only to discover I could mindfully binge. When I first walked into an FA meeting that I swore I did not need, I was startled to find something I had never known before: freedom from eating addictively. With the help of a sponsor, the Twelve Steps, and a loving fellowship, I began to heal long-buried trauma and reclaim a creative life that I thought was lost. My husband of 56 years joined FA, and we shared many wonderful years of recovery before his passing. In FA, I became a better listener, and our marriage got better. Imagine that! When he became ill, I was supported by my fellowship every step of the way. Today, my grandchildren – now adults – have never seen me abuse food or alcohol. I do my best to be present with everyone in my life. I write, paint, enjoy laughter, and live fully, grateful for this program. My Higher Power has been very good to me.
#141
January 21 · 28 min
124. From Totaling My Car to Total Gratitude
I was born a sugar addict, sneaking food as a child and using it to cope with my feelings. Moving constantly – twelve cities in eight years – made food my only reliable companion. In college, far from home, I'd cycle through dieting and binging, filled with shame but unable to stop. After many years of failed attempts at recovery, the binges escalated. They grew bigger, lasted longer, and became more dangerous. One night, I totaled my car while rummaging through a snack bag and rear-ended the car in front of me. As I waited for the police to arrive, all I could think about was my shrinking window of time to secretly binge before my husband came home. Sixteen years ago, I joined Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA); twelve years ago, I finally surrendered. With a strong sponsor who told me the truth with love, I followed direction for the first time. That decision changed everything. Today, the mind that was once noisy and negative is quiet and grateful. I go through each day without food cravings, I've stopped nitpicking, and my marriage has improved dramatically. My greatest gift is waking up each morning with the promise of another day of recovery.
#140
Dec 17, 2025 · 30 min
123. A Journey of Becoming: From Colored Girl to Proud African American Woman
At 65 years old and 210 pounds, I saw a photo on social media and didn’t recognize myself. That moment of disbelief led me to Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA), where I discovered I wasn’t just overweight – I was a food addict. As an African American woman, I grew up hearing that I’d have to work twice as hard to succeed, and the pressure turned into perfectionism. For years, I ate to cope, buying sweets late at night and eating in the car so no one would see. I knew every bakery on my route to work, each pink box “for everyone else.” After a stressful day, I’d close the curtains, turn on the TV, and eat. When I read the AA Big Book and swapped the word alcohol for food, I finally saw the truth. I’d heard about FA more than ten years earlier, but only when I was ready did I find what I needed: a sponsor, a scale, and a way to live without food running my life. I'm learning to live with grace, even through the biggest challenges. When my husband faced his fourth cancer diagnosis, I wanted to eat -- but instead, I dropped to my knees and asked for help. My fellows and my family brought meals, comfort, and strength when I needed it most. Today, at 76 – one day at a time – I am free from the addiction that once ruled my life. #africanamerican #foodaddiction #fromperfectionismtopeace #iamafoodaddict
#139
Dec 3, 2025 · 17 min
122. Learning to Dream
I grew up surrounded by addiction, though my parents had found recovery early in my life. I was a relatively skinny child. Diagnosed with ADHD at five years old, I was on medication that suppressed my appetite. In 5th grade, my parents and teachers decided to try taking me off meds for a year, and I went from a size 8 slim to a 16 husky, gaining 60 pounds. When I went back on the medication to improve my ability to focus, it never again suppressed my appetite. By 19, I weighed 240 pounds. I was lonely, broke, and down to one pair of pants with the thighs rubbed out. It was less embarrassing to ask my mom to take me to a meeting than to buy me the next size up. At my first Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA) meeting, I got a sponsor and began working the program. I’d had such a small view of what my future could be, but FA unleashed my ability to dream wildly and achieve those dreams. In the sixteen years since, my life has been transformed beyond what I could have imagined. I'm married, raising two kids, and living with peace and freedom instead of obsession and compulsion. FA saved my life. #FoodAddictionRecovery #FAStories #RecoveryJourney #LifeBeyondFood #FoodAddictsInRecoveryAnonymous #BreakingFreeFromFood #RecoveryWins #OneDayAtATime #HealingWithFA #FromStruggleToStrength #FARecovery #SelfLoveThroughRecovery
#138
Nov 19, 2025 · 33 min
121. The Guardrails of Recovery
When I found Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA), my weight wasn’t my real problem – it was the complete madness I experienced around food. Food had controlled my life since childhood. I grew up in my great-grandmother’s house, and the kitchen was my sanctuary. I was a fearful child; the sound of the doorbell sent me running to hide under her skirt, but food meant love and safety. I started using food to make myself feel better in high school when I was being bullied. Even after things got better, the feelings of insecurity didn’t. Food became my way to cope, and college only made it worse. I would seek refuge in a damp basement study space where I could eat alone. When my sister passed away at too young an age, weight began to show up on my body. Work in Washington, D.C. was challenging too; eating huge portions, hiding to eat, lying to cover it up – it was exhausting. I always made excuses to leave social events early. When someone at church asked what I put before God, I immediately knew my answer: food. At my lowest point, after consuming a bucket-sized family meal, I passed out in my car at a toll booth and was taken by ambulance to the hospital. Through multiple sponsors and countless relapses, I eventually found true recovery. Today, FA serves as my guardrail, preventing me from driving off the cliff of food addiction. My relationships have improved, and I’m no longer hiding. I have so much gratitude for this program. It is my blueprint for living.
#137
Nov 5, 2025 · 24 min
120. Beyond the Bottle: Facing Food Addiction
From vodka at 13 to nightly binges of flour and sugar in adulthood, my life was ruled by addiction. At 23, weighed down by blame, insecurity, and shame about being gay, I attempted to take my own life. At 24 years old, I found sobriety in A.A. After decades of struggling with food, weighing over 240 pounds, I discovered Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA). In FA, I began a journey of abstinence that transformed my life – body, mind, and spirit. In FA, I stopped blaming others and learned how to be honest with myself. I reconnected with a higher power and returned to a healthy weight. I even went back to school at 48, earned a degree, and experienced a rewarding final chapter in my career before I retired. I have also endured profound loss. I lost both of my parents within six weeks of each other, and not long after, my brother and sister. I was able to walk through grief abstinently, supported by the tools in FA and with a higher power guiding me. At 64, I live one day at a time, forever grateful for the Twelve Steps and the many, many gifts of recovery. #lgbtq #grief #spiritualcondition #sober #abstinent #workingthetools
#136
Oct 15, 2025 · 21 min
119. 43 Years of No Longer Being Controlled by Food
The oldest of six children with parents who were overwhelmed, but tried hard, she found comfort in food from an early age. Despite being an average student at a healthy weight, she struggled with self-doubt and a fear of failure. After leaving home, food became her go-to coping mechanism for fear, doubt, and insecurity. Throughout her recovery, she faced many health challenges — including multiple sclerosis, tuberculosis, and numerous surgeries. When she found Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA), she thought she could manage on her own. However, true change only came when she followed suggestions, got a sponsor, and used the tools of the program. She now has deep and meaningful relationships, and she finds joy in the simple things. Her story is an example of the advice to “stay until the miracle happens.
#135
Oct 1, 2025 · 30 min
118. The Real Magic
My earliest recollection is from the age of four – being shy and awkward, always afraid to join other kids at play. I was a picky eater and would take a long time to get through what was on my plate. Still, I began to put on the pounds, and I got it in my head that losing weight would change everything. I’d be confident, outgoing, and finally feel like I fit in. So, I went on a diet. Then, I binged. At first, it was just Friday nights, like a little “date” with food. Then it was the whole weekend. Before I knew it, I was binging every night. By 19, I was deep in bulimia – hiding food, purging, taking laxatives, anything to keep my weight down. I kept looking for a “magic fix,” but nothing worked. One doctor told me to eat in moderation, and another told me to go to a 12-step program. I went, but I didn’t think I was that bad – until I was. Years went by. I lost jobs. I even ate out of garbage bins. I joined another program, but I manipulated it to eat what I wanted. I worked the steps, but not really. And my life? It didn’t change. In 2009, I found Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA). I was skeptical, but something clicked. I got a sponsor, and I’ve been abstinent ever since. At first, I complained about the structure – the weighing, the meetings, all of it. Eventually, I stopped fighting it, and when I did, everything changed. Today, I’m fully engaged in life – not just in a smaller body, but with a healthier mind and spirit. I show up for my family, connect with people, and have real friendships – real confidence. Food no longer controls me, and I finally feel free. #bulimia #bulimic #bingeeater #bingepurge

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