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Empowered to Connect Podcast

Empowered to Connect

The Empowered to Connect Podcast a place where we come together to discuss an attachment rich, healing centered approach to engagement and well being for ourselves, our families and our communities.

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#247
September 22 · 1 hr 9 min
[E247] Understanding FASD: The Diagnosis 90% of Doctors Miss with Sandra Flach
FASD specialist and adoptive mom Sandra Flach joins Jesse to break down fetal alcohol spectrum disorder: what it actually is, why it hides behind behavior nobody understands, and why it's one of the most common and least discussed disabilities in foster care and adoption. Sandra shares her own family's diagnosis journey and the accommodations-based approach that finally helped her understand her sons instead of just managing their behavior. It's a conversation for anyone parenting a child whose
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#246
September 8 · 44 min
[E246] You're Not the Hero of Their Story, & That's the Point: A Conversation about Open Adoption with Annie Iverson
What does open adoption actually mean, and what happens when fear gets in the way of staying connected? Annie Iverson, adoptive mom of four and creator of Write It & Remember It, joins us to talk honestly about openness, boundaries, and the small, sustainable habits that keep birth family connections alive. Episode Bullets Openness lives on a spectrum, from a card a few times a year to regular visits. There's no single "right" version of it. Three common misconceptions about open adoption: i
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#245
August 25 · 1 hr 1 min
[E245] The Science and Heart of Bedtime with Allison Ezell
If bedtime in your house feels like a nightly negotiation, or you're the one lying in the dark at 2 a.m. wondering why nothing seems to work, this conversation is for you. Pediatric sleep consultant Allison Ezell spent years stuck between a sleep doctor telling her to sleep train and a TBRI therapist affirming the trauma-informed parenting she knew her son needed, unable to find anyone who could bridge the two. She eventually became the person she needed, and she's bringing that hard-won wisdom
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#244
August 11 · 54 min
[E244] Redefining the Parent Report Card with Nicole Barlow
What if the parent report card you've been grading yourself on this whole time was never actually yours to fill out? Episode summary bullets: Nicole Barlow, longtime foster and adoptive mom and one of our Cultivate Connection facilitators, shares how she went from feeling like a "rockstar" foster parent to realizing she was in way over her head. Why the peer-to-peer model at the heart of Cultivate Connection matters: none of us are exempt from putting these tools into practice in our own hom
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#243
July 28 · 55 min
[E243] The Risk of Winning
Ever notice how a bedtime standoff, a backtalk moment, or a flat-out refusal can turn into you against your kid? Jesse sits down with Mo & Tona Ottinger for an honest look at what happens when parenting starts to feel like a competition, and why "winning" a moment can quietly cost you the relationship. This one includes real, unfiltered stories (including a New Year's Eve bedtime battle that's now family legend) and a simple mindset shift that changes how you handle the next hard moment. What we
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#242
July 14 · 1 hr 26 min
[E242] Torn From the Root: Rhonda Roorda on Honoring the Voice Within
Some books change the way we see. Rhonda Roorda's In Their Own Voices did that for countless adoptive families, including our own here at ETC. In this episode, Rhonda returns to walk us through her debut memoir, Torn from the Root, and the four questions at its center: who was going to get hurt, what was it going to cost, who would be held accountable, and what hope could there be for repair. It is a tender, unflinching conversation about transracial adoption, the voice of the child within, and
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#241
June 30 · 1 hr 6 min
[E241] The Consequences of Consequences
You said it would be the last warning. You meant it this time. And somehow you are standing in the hallway with your voice raised, wondering how you ended up here again. If consequences have quietly become your first move, and you are starting to suspect they are not actually working, this conversation is for you. What we cover in this episode Why a consequence is so often the first thing we reach for, and what that reach is usually really about What a quick consequence shuts down: the curio
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#240
June 16 · 1 hr 6 min
[E240] Your Summer Survival Guide
Summer is here, and Jesse and Tona are keeping it real: they love summer, and it also asks a lot of them. In this episode, they sit down (virtually, because summer pivots happen to hosts too) to talk honestly about what it actually feels like to parent through the loss of structure — and what it can look like to find your footing in the middle of the season. They cover everything from the emotional load working parents carry when school lets out, to practical ideas for younger kids and teenagers
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#239
June 2 · 48 min
[E239] Replay Let's Talk About Lying with Robyn Gobbel
Why do kids lie, even when the truth would have been easier? This week, we’re replaying an oldie but a goodie: Let's Talk About Lying with Robyn Gobbel. Lying is usually about fear and felt safety, not character. This one will change how you respond.
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#238
May 19 · 40 min
[E238] Replay Understanding the Brain, Body, Behavior Connection with Mona Delahooke
Catch the replay! Mona is a Pediatric Psychologist and the author of Beyond Behaviors, among several other books. If you've ever read Beyond Behaviors, you know how brilliant she is! In this episode, we talk about the Brain - Body - Behavior connection and why it is absolutely essential for parents and caregivers to understand. Struggling with perplexing behavior in your home? This may be the episode you've been waiting for. We also talk about Mona's book that was published in 2022. Wanna learn
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#237
May 5 · 48 min
[E237] When You’re New to Supporting a Foster or Adoptive Family
Episode 237 is live! ️ If someone you love is in the middle of a new placement (whether that's a newborn, a toddler, or a teenager), this one is for the people standing beside them. Tona, Becca, and Jesse get practical about what it actually looks like to show up well for foster and adoptive families. Not just in the first week, but in the long haul. What's the most meaningful thing someone did for you (or that you did for someone else) during a new placement?
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#236
April 21 · 56 min
[E236] When You're New to Walking Together as Adoptive/Foster Parents
Community can feel different when your parenting journey looks different. Sometimes your circle shifts. Sometimes it shrinks. And sometimes it stretches you in ways you didn’t expect. But here’s what’s true: you are not the only one figuring it out as you go. Ask for help. Say the honest thing. Find people who truly get it, and hold onto the ones who love you even when they don’t fully understand. Your community might not look how you imagined, but it can still show up for you, support you, and
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#235
April 7 · 59 min
[E235] When You’re New to Parenting through Adoption & Foster Care
In this episode Becca, Jesse, and Tona walk us through what it looked like for them at the beginning of their parenting journey. Starting foster care, adoption, or any new parenting role can feel disorienting and overwhelming. It won’t always feel natural or easy, and you may not feel an instant connection. That’s normal! There will be stress, uncertainty, and moments where you question yourself, but that doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong. What matters most is showing up consistently, being wil
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#234
March 24 · 40 min
[E234] When Protection Becomes a Prison: Breaking Down the Wall Between Us with Sherry Varughese
Let’s talk about the “Wall Between Us”, the invisible, protective bricks we build from past hurt that quietly block connection with the people we love most. Our snapping, withdrawing, overreacting, and people-pleasing once protected us. But what if they’re now keeping us stuck? Healing doesn’t start with fixing our kids. It starts with noticing our own “shark music;” noticing what is keeping us from connection. This conversation is about compassion over shame. Curiosity over judgment. And small,
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#233
March 10 · 57 min
[E233] Why the Best Teachers Lead with Connection with Marti Smith & Amie Huggins
What if connection is one of the most powerful tools in the classroom? In this episode, Marti Smith and Amie Huggins join us to share about their new book The Connected Classroom and what they’ve learned working with educators inside real school systems. They talk about why building trust with students matters so much—and how connection creates the safety kids need to engage, learn, and grow. If you’re a teacher, caregiver, or anyone who cares about helping kids thrive at school, this conversati
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#232
February 24 · 33 min
[E232] When You're Tired Of Trying with Melissa Corkum
Does your nervous system feel like it’s been in survival mode for a long time? This episode is for you. We sat down in person with Melissa Corkum to talk about burnout, blocked care, and why connection can start to feel like a shock instead of a reward. A few takeaways: ✨ Emotional pain and physical pain activate the same parts of the brain.✨ Blocked care isn’t a character flaw — it’s a protective response.✨ You don’t heal it by trying harder. You start by caring for your own nervous system.
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#231
February 10 · 45 min
[E231] When You're Tired in Your Heart with Dr. Archandria Owens
On this next part of our mini-series “When You’re Tired”, we reflect on being emotionally tired. It is the quiet exhaustion that comes from caring deeply, showing up consistently, and holding space for others. Dr. Archandria Owens and Jesse discuss naming and expressing emotions, unmet expectations, and explore gentle ways to care for ourselves when we are exhausted in this particular way.
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#230
January 27 · 47 min
[E230] When You're Tired in Your Body with Jill Stockburger
On today’s episode, Jesse and Jill Stockburger dive into a big question: What do we do when we’re living in chronic stress? They talk about how stress, adversity, and trauma impact us on a deeper level, and what it actually feels like to carry these experiences in our bodies. If you’re feeling tired in your body, you are not alone.
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#229
January 13 · 49 min
[E229] Connection Over Compliance: What We’re Really Teaching Kids in Hard Moments
In today’s episode, Jesse and Tona take a deep dive into the tension between connection and compliance in everyday parenting moments. Through real-life stories (yes, even dishes), we explore how prioritizing relationship doesn’t mean abandoning expectations and structure. Instead, it creates the foundation for lasting responsibility and trust. Join us for a thoughtful conversation about playing the long game, responding instead of reacting, and why connection is often the fastest path to meaning
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#228
Dec 30, 2025 · 52 min
[E228] The Midyear Reset: Supporting Kids in the Second Half of the School Year
New semester! Same kids, different needs. As the second half of the school year begins, routines may get messy, expectations may shift, and those old pain points may resurface. In this episode Jesse, Becca, and Dr. Rachel talk about pausing, noticing what’s not working, and making small, doable adjustments (at home and at school). From the kiddos to adults, we can all find ways to revamp our expectations by staying curious and starting small. Here’s to a second semester filled with grace, flexib
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