175. How to Be More Confident Spending Time Alone | 5 Things That Changed How I Think About Loneliness

If you've ever felt like a loser for not having Friday night plans or like a "weirdo" for spending too much time alone...this episode is for you. I'll walk through my story first, including the impulsive cross-country move that made my loneliness worse instead of better (IYKYK), and then break down the 5 things that made me feel more confident in being alone and how you can apply them to your life too. Topics covered: 👉🏻 Why moving into my first solo apartment in 2023 sent me into a spiral 👉🏻 The real reason I moved from LA to Chicago, and why it backfired completely 👉🏻 Why you have to stop waiting for your life to start 👉🏻 How to build a life you're actually excited to participate in 👉🏻 Why you need to stop living your life through somebody else's eyes 👉🏻 The difference between loneliness and solitude Referenced in this episode: 👉🏻 153: How to Make Friends as an Adult — https://youtu.be/H2FA7uTSL1w 👉🏻 110: Living Alone Without Feeling Lonely | How to Build Confidence by Doing Things Alone — https://youtu.be/0rmaioROGcI GET THE NEW PRODUCTIVITY PLANNER! 👉🏻 https://breakyourbudget.com/productivity-planner Subscribe to the Beyond Your Budget Substack: https://breakyourbudget.substack.com/ Personal Finance Starter Kit: https://breakyourbudget.substack.com/p/your-personal-finance-starter-kit BREAK YOUR BUDGET RESOURCES: 💸 Personal Finance Dashboard: https://breakyourbudget.com/personal-finance-dashboard 💸 Basic Budgeting Template: https://breakyourbudget.com/basic-budgeting-template 💸 FI/RE Template: https://breakyourbudget.com/fire-template 💸 Rent vs. Buy Calculator: https://breakyourbudget.com/rent-vs-buy-calculator 💳 TOOLS I USE: 💸 Rakuten Cash Back (cash back on purchases you're already making): https://shorturl.at/w0PcH 💸 SoFi HYSA (my fave high yield savings account): https://secure.money.com/pr/pa5344bfc4f2 💸 Classpass (try it for a discounted first month): https://classpass.com/refer/UKLV6BN026 📚 MY BOOKS: 💸 Own Your Money: https://breakyourbudget.com/own-your-money 💸 Own Your Career: https://breakyourbudget.com/oyc-book All Other Resources: https://breakyourbudget.com/links 👩🏼‍💻 Inquiries: michela@breakyourbudget.com 📸 Instagram (Break Your Budget): https://www.instagram.com/breakyourbudget/ 📸 Instagram (Personal): https://www.instagram.com/michela_alloccaa 📲 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@breakyourbudget 💸 My ShopMy: https://shopmy.us/shop/michelaallocca TIMESTAMPS: 00:00 — The skill I've spent the last 3–4 years building: actually enjoying being alone 06:00 — Moving into my first solo apartment at 28 hit me like a brick 12:00 — The 2 real reasons I was lonely, and neither one was about my surroundings 15:00 — Why Chicago ended up being the loneliest period of my entire life 22:00 — Why you have to stop waiting for your life to start 26:00 — Building a life you're actually excited to participate in & the hobbies I picked up 35:00 — How I stopped living my life for an imaginary audience 37:00 — Why you have to intentionally build community 44:00 — The distinction that reframed everything: solitude vs. loneliness 47:00 — Why I call solitude a superpower, and why that doesn't mean I don't want connection