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Connected Parenting · Yesterday · 21 min

When Your Child's Behaviour Affects Everyone | CP271

When a child has a major meltdown in public, it can feel like suddenly everyone around you has an opinion about your parenting. Inspired by a recent story about a child whose behaviour reportedly caused a plane to turn around, Jennifer explores why it's impossible to understand what is happening with a child or family from a few difficult moments. Autism, ADHD, sensory challenges, anxiety, fear, trauma, exhaustion, or simply an exceptionally hard day can all influence how a child responds when their nervous system becomes overwhelmed. In this episode of Connected Parenting, Jennifer looks beyond the judgement and focuses on what happens when a child's nervous system reaches its limit, especially when it happens with an audience. Whether it's on an airplane, in a grocery store, at a restaurant, or in the school parking lot, parenting a dysregulated child while feeling watched and judged can make an already difficult situation even harder. This episode offers a more compassionate way to understand these moments and reminds parents that behaviour doesn't always tell us the full story of what a child, or their parent, is experiencing. Jennifer's Takeaways: The Airplane Incident and Context (00:00) The Parent-Child Dysregulation Loop (03:12) Connect Before You Correct (06:30) Practical Strategies for Difficult Transitions (12:39) Managing Sensory and Physical Needs (15:10) Parenting Without an Audience (17:59) Understanding Behavior as a Symptom (18:47) Meet Jennifer Kolari Jennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family. Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers. Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies. Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia. One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

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show notes

When a child has a major meltdown in public, it can feel like suddenly everyone around you has an opinion about your parenting.

Inspired by a recent story about a child whose behaviour reportedly caused a plane to turn around, Jennifer explores why it's impossible to understand what is happening with a child or family from a few difficult moments.

Autism, ADHD, sensory challenges, anxiety, fear, trauma, exhaustion, or simply an exceptionally hard day can all influence how a child responds when their nervous system becomes overwhelmed.

In this episode of Connected Parenting, Jennifer looks beyond the judgement and focuses on what happens when a child's nervous system reaches its limit, especially when it happens with an audience.

Whether it's on an airplane, in a grocery store, at a restaurant, or in the school parking lot, parenting a dysregulated child while feeling watched and judged can make an already difficult situation even harder.

This episode offers a more compassionate way to understand these moments and reminds parents that behaviour doesn't always tell us the full story of what a child, or their parent, is experiencing.

Jennifer's Takeaways:

  • The Airplane Incident and Context (00:00)
  • The Parent-Child Dysregulation Loop (03:12)
  • Connect Before You Correct (06:30)
  • Practical Strategies for Difficult Transitions (12:39)
  • Managing Sensory and Physical Needs (15:10)
  • Parenting Without an Audience (17:59)
  • Understanding Behavior as a Symptom (18:47)

Meet Jennifer Kolari

Jennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.

Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.

Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.

Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.

One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

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