Health & FitnessAlternative HealthMedicine

Building your family

Lisa Schuman

Welcome to Building Your Family, the only expert-guided community platform designed for parents and parents-to-be using reproductive medicine to build their families. We provide unique strategies to help make your path to parenthood smoother and more informed—empowering you to navigate the critical decisions that shape your family’s future.

At Building Your Family, we’ve already helped thousands of people navigate the complexities of family building and parenting with confidence. Our goal is to equip you with the knowledge and strategies to make these life-changing decisions with greater clarity, resulting in better outcomes and fewer regrets.

We understand that many of the decisions you make along this journey can’t be undone, and that’s why our approach is all about offering you practical, actionable steps that you can start applying right now. Our educational components are tailored to help you think differently, make more informed choices, and take control of your experience—from fertility treatments to parenting strategies.

Whether you’re just starting out or already deep into your journey, Building Your Family is here to guide you with expert advice, specialized education, stress-reduction strategies, and the community support you need to make the best choices for you and your family.

For more information, sign up for our newsletter, you will be able to stay up to date with the episodes, get information about our programs and most of all join our warm community.
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Monthly email: https://familybuilding.net/newsletter-sign-up/
Watch the podcast on YouTube http://bit.ly/3E49Z1k
Follow along on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/thecenterforfamilybuilding/

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#190
Sunday · 12 min
Before You Choose a Donor: The ‘Zoom Out’ Guide to Donor Conception for Future Parents
If you’re considering donor conception and feel like you “can’t see the forest for the trees,” this is your zoom‑out episode. Before you choose a donor, sign with a clinic, or pay an agency, you need the big picture. In this video, we step back from the overwhelm and walk through the full donor conception landscape: • How your decisions affect your child long‑term (identity, mental health, relationships) • Common mistakes parents make when they’re rushed, exhausted, or only hearing the clinic’s side • How to think about psychological screening My goal with this episode is simple: to help you feel calmer, clearer, and better equipped to lead your family through donor conception without feeling lost or alone. If you found this helpful, you might also like my workshops on • How to tell your child their donor conception story: https://familybuilding.net/events-page/ • Donor Conception 101 for new and future parents: https://familybuilding.net/events-page/ #donorconception #ivf #eggdonor #spermdonor #lgbtqfamily #familybuilding
#189
August 2 · 48 min
Tampons, Toxins & Fertility: What The FDA Hasn’t Updated Since 2005
Are your tampons quietly exposing you to toxic metals and chemicals that could affect your hormones and fertility? In this episode of Building Your Family, Dr. Nancy Reame breaks down what the FDA has (and hasn’t) done on tampon safety since 2005 and how that compares to Europe. We cover the real story behind tampon safety, Toxic Shock Syndrome, and what the science actually says about toxins in period products. You’ll learn how chemicals are absorbed through the vagina, what we know about toxic metals like lead and cadmium in tampons, and how all of this may impact menstrual health and fertility. Dr. Reame explains: The history of tampon safety and how Toxic Shock Syndrome changed regulations Why US tampon regulations haven’t been updated since 2005, and how Europe handles toxic materials differently How and why the vagina is so absorbent, and what that means for chemical exposure What current research suggests about toxic metals and endocrine-disrupting chemicals in period products The real risks of long-term exposure vs what’s been overhyped Pros and cons of alternatives like menstrual cups and pads (including how to use them safely) How to read labels, evaluate brands, and find reliable, science-based resources How to stay appropriately concerned without spiraling into panic We also talk about advocacy: how to push for better testing, transparency in ingredients, and stronger public health guidance for women’s health products. If you care about menstrual health, fertility, and safer period products, hit subscribe, share this episode with a friend, and check the links in the description for the research and resources mentioned. PubMed: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/32382713/ Consumer reports: https://www.consumerreports.org/ Made Safe: https://madesafe.org/ Mamavation: https://mamavation.com/ #tamponsafety #toxicshocksyndrome #periodproducts #womenshealth #menstrualhealth #fertility #toxins #endocrinedisruptors #reproductivehealth #periodtalk #buildingyourfamilypodcast
#188
July 26 · 12 min
Zooming Out in Surrogacy: Keys to a Successful Journey
Your clinic and agency help you with the medical and legal parts of surrogacy. But who helps you zoom out and see the bigger picture for you, your surrogate, and your future child? In this Zoom Out Theory episode, reproductive therapist Lisa Schuman, LCSW, talks about how to step back from the day‑to‑day stress of surrogacy so you can make clearer decisions and set your journey up for long‑term success. We explore how most surrogates are caring, altruistic people, how to build a healthy relationship and communication rhythm with your surrogate, and how to keep your future child in mind without getting overwhelmed. In this episode, you’ll learn: What the Zoom Out Theory is and how it applies to surrogacy How emotions and stress can quietly shape decisions during your journey Keys to the most helpful communication strategy with your surrogate Why regular check‑ins and clear expectations matter over time How to think about the long‑term impact on your relationships and your future child Why documenting your surrogacy experience can support your child later How to balance emotional awareness with rational clarity when you’re making big choices If you’re using surrogacy to build your family and want a calmer, more thoughtful journey, this episode will give you tools to zoom out and see the whole picture. #surrogacy #familybuilding #donorconception
#187
July 19 · 1 hr 8 min
No “Normal” Embryos? You May Still Have Choices
“No normal embryos” doesn’t always mean the end. Lisa talks with Dr. Norbert Gleicher and Dr. David Barad from the Center for Human Reproduction about IVF for tough cases, especially older patients. They discuss PGTA, aneuploid and mosaic embryos, immunology, inflammation, and why individualized, evidence‑based treatment can open options many patients don’t realize they have. Have you been told you have “no normal embryos” and feel like you’re out of options? In this episode of the Building Your Family Podcast, Lisa talks with Dr. Norbert Gleicher and Dr. David Barad from the Center for Human Reproduction about IVF for some of the toughest cases: older patients, “no normal embryos,” and cycles where many people are told there’s nothing else to try. They discuss why careful diagnosis and truly individualized treatment matter so much, especially for older patients; how they think about embryos other clinics might not consider; and what current evidence actually shows about PGTA, aneuploid and mosaic embryos, and implantation. They also explore the role of immunology, inflammation, toxins like microplastics, supplements, and AI in embryo selection. In this conversation, you’ll hear about: What “no normal embryos” really means (and what it doesn’t) Why one‑size‑fits‑all IVF protocols often fail older patients The controversy around PGTA and how it affects real‑world outcomes When aneuploid and mosaic embryos may still be part of a thoughtful plan How immunology, inflammation, and sensitivities can impact implantation Personalized ovulation induction for older patients Why evidence‑based, individualized care matters more than trends or hype If you’ve been told there are no options left, this episode can help you ask better questions and understand what might still be possible for your family. Subscribe to the Building Your Family Podcast for more evidence‑based conversations on fertility, donor conception, and surrogacy. Episode resources Website: https://centerforhumanreprod.com/
#186
July 12 · 9 min
Zoom Out: The One Egg Freezing Question No One Asks
In this first episode of the Zoom Out series, reproductive therapist, researcher, and author Lisa Schuman, LCSW unpacks the most important question almost no one asks about egg freezing. Lisa explains why “How many eggs can I freeze?” is only part of the story, and why you also need to understand how many cycles and eggs you’re likely to need for the kind of family you actually want in the future. She introduces her Zoom Out Theory – a simple framework to help you step back from panic, manage stress, and make clearer decisions about your fertility. Drawing on decades of clinical experience and research, Lisa also shares surprising data about non‑genetic parenthood options: how many egg freezing patients are open to donor eggs, embryos, or other paths if needed, and why that matters for how aggressively you pursue more cycles now. You’ll learn: The critical egg freezing question almost no one thinks to ask Why freezing “as many eggs as possible” isn’t always necessary – or helpful How your emotional state can quietly distort your fertility decisions What Lisa’s research reveals about patients’ real openness to non‑genetic options A practical way to zoom out and plan for your long‑term family, not just the next cycle If you’re considering egg freezing – or you’ve already frozen eggs and are wondering what comes next – this episode will help you balance facts and feelings so you can move forward with more confidence. #eggfreezing #fertility #ivfjourney #fertilitypreservation #reproductivehealth #ttc #familybuilding #donorconception
#185
July 5 · 40 min
From Infertility to Motherhood: Dr. Jessica Gray on Resilience, Miscarriage & Finding Control
In this episode of Building Your Family, Lisa Schuman, LCSW sits down with Dr. Jessica Gray, a physician who has lived through infertility, miscarriage, and the intense pressures of medical training on her way to motherhood. Jessica shares how a stressful childhood shaped her resilience, what it was like to face endometriosis and IVF as both a doctor and a patient, and how she coped when a long‑hoped‑for pregnancy ended in miscarriage. She talks candidly about binders of notes, hours of research, and the feeling of “doing everything right” and still not getting the outcome she hoped for. Together, Lisa and Jessica explore the emotional burden of infertility on both partners, the importance of support systems, and the small planning behaviors that can create a sense of control in an uncertain journey. Jessica reflects on how she now gives back to the infertility and parenting community, and what she would say to her younger self who was just starting down this road. If you’ve felt isolated, overwhelmed, or “not like yourself” during infertility or pregnancy, this conversation offers validation, practical coping ideas, and hope. Dr. Jessica Gray resources: Website: https://www.drjessicagraymd.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drjessicagraymd #infertility #miscarriage #IVFjourney #endometriosis #ttccommunity #infertilitysupport #pregnancyloss #mentalhealth #familybuilding #fertilitytreatment #resilience #motherhood #medicaltraining #emotionalhealth #buildyourfamilypodcast
#184
June 28 · 39 min
Single Motherhood by Choice: 5 Steps Before You Decide (with Alexis Melnick, MD)
If you’re single or in a relationship that isn’t working and you’re quietly Googling “single motherhood by choice,” this episode is for you. In this conversation with SMBC fertility doctor Alexis Melnick, MD, we walk through 5 clear steps to help you decide before your back is against the wall. We cover both paths: staying on the relationship track and exploring single motherhood by choice on your own timeline. You’ll hear about the emotional, practical, financial, and support‑system questions to ask yourself so you can move from spiraling alone at 2 a.m. to making a grounded plan. Inside this episode: • Who this is really for (single, dating, or in a shaky relationship) • The 5‑step framework Alexis uses with clients considering SMBC • Grief, stigma, and the “mourning period” for the life you imagined • Why so many people say they wish they’d decided earlier • How to know you didn’t “fail” if you choose this path If you’re considering donor conception or surrogacy as a single parent, this will help you feel less alone, more informed, and better prepared. Work with Alexis: [alm2036@med.cornell.edu] Get my free family‑building resources: 10 Things Donor Conceived Children Want Their Parents To Understand: https://familybuilding.net/free-downloads/ #singlemotherbychoice #singlemotherhood #donorconception #fertilityjourney #queerfamily
#183
June 21 · 13 min
Queer Family Pride Special: Donor Conception, Talking To Kids, and Embracing Your Family
In honor of Pride, this episode is a love letter to queer family building. I’ve pulled my favorite moments from conversations with LGBTQ+ parents, a fertility doctor, a midwife, a donor‑conceived person, and queer influencers who’ve built their families through donor conception and surrogacy. Together, they share how they answer intrusive questions, how they talk to their kids about donors and surrogates, and how they’ve learned to fully embrace the families they fought so hard to create. We talk about: • Navigating fertility clinics, donor conception, and surrogacy as queer intended parents • What to actually say when people ask, “But who’s the real mom/dad?” • Age‑appropriate language for talking to children about donors and surrogates • Grief, joy, and pride on the path to queer parenthood • How our families feel now that their children are here If you’re using reproductive medicine, donor conception, or surrogacy to build your family, you are not alone. This episode is meant to sit beside you in the messy middle, give you words when you’re tongue‑tied, and remind you that your family is real, valid, and worthy of celebration. Please join us on the anniversary of Stonewall for a free Queer Family Building workshop. Register here: https://familybuilding.net/events-page/ #QueerFamily #DonorConception #QueerFertility #FamilyBuilding #DonorConceived #Pride
#182
June 14 · 26 min
Broadway Husbands: Their Road to Maverick (Pride Tribute) Re-Released for Pride in Bret’s Honor
Re-released for Pride 2026 — In loving memory of Bret Hanna-Shuford (1979–2026) In this beloved episode, I sit down with Bret Shuford and Stephen Hanna — the Broadway Dads — to talk about one of the most heartfelt and hard-won family-building journeys I’ve ever witnessed. Together, these two Broadway performers navigated egg donation, surrogacy, financial challenges, a lost match, a miscarriage, and a global pandemic before welcoming their son, Maverick, in 2022. Bret passed away in January 2026 after a sudden and devastating illness. He was 46 years old. Stephen is now raising Maverick on his own — and remains a fierce, loving advocate for the LGBTQ+ community in their pursuit of parenthood. I re-release this episode with a full heart, because Bret’s spirit, humor, and generosity shine through every minute of it. In this episode we cover: • How Bret and Stephen chose their egg donor — and why the first profile felt right • The surrogacy process as two performers managing a major financial investment • How they handled the hard questions from others • What they wish they had known going in • The moment they knew it was “supposed to be this way” This one is for every queer person who has ever dreamed of becoming a parent — and for Bret, who never stopped believing it was possible. Episode resources Buy the new book "Goodnight Break a Leg": https://bit.ly/GoodNightBreakALegBook #DonorConceptionConversations #Pride2026 #BroadwayDads #LGBTQFamily #BroadwayHusbands #Surrogacy #QueerParenting #DonorConception #EggDonation #GayDads #InMemoriam #FamilyBuilding #BretShuford #BuildingYourFamily #RepresentationMatters #LGBTQ
#181
June 7 · 1 hr 3 min
Queer Families & Donor Conception: Building Strong Bonds Beyond Biology with Jaimie Kelton
What does it really look like to build a queer family today – with donor conception, infertility, and non‑biological parenting in the mix? In this episode of Building Your Family, Lisa sits down with long‑time queer family advocate and podcast host of the Queer Family Podcast, Jaimie Kelton to talk honestly about infertility, the emotional weight of genetics, and the many paths LGBTQ+ families take to build their families. They explore how advocacy and resources for queer families have evolved, why non‑biological connections can be just as deep as genetic ones, and how humor helps normalize complex family dynamics. You’ll hear candid stories about slow bonding, the myth of the “instant magical moment,” and why accepting your unique path changes everything. Lisa and Jamie also dig into the importance of intentional parenting, open communication about donor conception, and how to create safety for kids to ask questions about their origins. If you’re a queer parent, planning a family, or supporting LGBTQIA families, this conversation will give you language, perspective, and community for the journey. You’ll learn: How advocacy and resources for queer families have changed Why infertility and emotional struggles are universal and important to acknowledge How to navigate feelings about genetics and non‑biological parenting Practical ways to talk with kids about donor conception Why community support and openness matter so much for LGBTQ+ family building Guest resources Website: https://www.thequeerfamilypodcast.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@thequeerfamilypodcast Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thequeerfamilypodcast/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thequeerfamilypodcast
#180
May 31 · 55 min
Ask the Experts: Everything You Need to Know About Donor Conception — with Dr. Mark Leondires
Re-released for Pride 2026 — Because this conversation never gets old What does it actually feel like to need a donor to build your family? How do you choose the right one? What does the medical process look like — and what does the emotional process look like? In this rare co-author conversation, I put these questions to Dr. Mark Leondires, Founder and Medical Director of Illume Fertility and Gay Parents To Be — and he turns them right back on me. Together, Dr. Leondires and I wrote Building Your Family: The Complete Guide to Donor Conception. In this episode, we give you the condensed, honest version — the medical clarity, the practical steps, and the emotional truth — all in one place. You’ll walk away knowing: • The key medical steps in egg, sperm, and embryo donation • How to think about choosing a donor — and what really matters • The emotional landscape most people don’t expect • What to tell your children — and when • Why donor conception is more mainstream than ever, and what that means for your family Whether you’re just starting to explore the idea or are already in the process, this episode gives you clear, actionable guidance from two of the leading voices in the field. No fluff. No overwhelm. Just answers. #DonorConceptionConversations #Pride2026 #DonorConception #LGBTQFamily #EggDonation #SpermDonation #IVF #FertilityDoctor #BuildingYourFamily #DrMarkLeondires #IllumeFertility #GayParentsToBe #FamilyBuilding #QueerFamily #FertilityPodcast #ListenNow Co-authors Lisa Schuman &; Dr. Mark Leondires answer your biggest donor conception questions — medical, emotional &; practical. 50+ years of expertise in one episode. ABOUT THE GUESTS Dr. Mark Leondires, MD — Founder and Medical Director, Illume Fertility; Founder, Gay Parents To Be; co-author, Building Your Family: The Complete Guide to Donor Conception. Father through donor conception and surrogacy. Lisa Schuman, LCSW — Founding Director, The Center for Family Building; host, Donor Conception Conversations podcast; co-author, Building Your Family: The Complete Guide to Donor Conception; award-winning researcher, ASRM.
#179
May 24 · 34 min
Secondary Infertility & PCOS: What To Do When Doctors Say “Just Keep Trying”
She was only 25 and already knew something was wrong. If you have one child and are secretly struggling to have another, this episode is for you. Margarita’s story of secondary infertility and PCOS shows what happens when “just keep trying” isn’t good enough. In this episode of Building Your Family, Lisa Schuman sits down with Margarita Lainez to talk about the often overlooked reality of secondary infertility and PCOS. After having her first child with ease, Margarita assumed a second would come naturally. Instead, she faced month after month of negative tests, dismissive “just keep trying” advice, and the heavy guilt of not giving her son a sibling. Margarita shares what it was like to live this while working inside the fertility world, how she finally pushed for a real workup and received a PCOS diagnosis, and the grief, shame, and loneliness that came with that season. Together, Lisa and Margarita explore self‑advocacy, setting boundaries, protecting your mental health, and finding the right support when friends, family, or even doctors don’t fully understand. If you’re in the middle of your own fertility journey, especially secondary infertility, this conversation will help you feel less alone and more equipped to ask for what you need. Inside this episode: What secondary infertility can feel like day‑to‑day Being told “just keep trying” when you know something is wrong Getting to a PCOS diagnosis and what self‑advocacy really looked like Shame, blame, and the pressure to “give a sibling” Setting boundaries, finding community, and caring for your mental health What grounded, realistic hope can look like after grief If you’re in secondary infertility or on a donor conception path and want help with the emotional and decision‑making side, that’s exactly what we do inside Building Your Family. 👉 Learn more and get support here: https://familybuilding.net/building-your-family-community/ Guest resources LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/margarita-lainez-950a2860/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/margaritalainez100/ #secondaryinfertility #PCOS #fertilityjourney #infertilitysupport #buildingyourfamily #donorconception #ttccommunity
#178
May 17 · 49 min
When Standard IVF Isn’t Enough: How One Fertility Doctor Thinks Differently
If you’ve been told “this is just your protocol,” “we’ll just try again,” or “everything looks fine” while IVF keeps failing, this episode is for you. Standard IVF works for many people, but not for everyone. So what happens when you don’t fit the usual box? In this conversation, I’m joined by Dr. Pietro Bortoletto, reproductive endocrinologist at Terra Fertility. He trained at Northwestern, Brigham & Women’s / Mass General, and Weill Cornell, and now focuses on the hard cases: diminished ovarian reserve, recurrent implantation failure, recurrent pregnancy loss, endometriosis, fibroids, and Müllerian anomalies. We talk about: Why he stepped out of the traditional IVF system How real experts think “outside the box” without going fringe When surgery actually helps (and when it’s just more trauma) The role of endometriosis, inflammation, and the immune system in fertility What thoughtful immunologic workups look like (and when they’re not useful) When to seek a second opinion and how to do it respectfully Mindset tools for staying sane when the road is long and uncertain This is not personal medical advice. It is a window into how a well‑trained REI thinks when standard IVF isn’t working, so you can have better, deeper conversations with your own team. 🔗 If you’re in treatment, using donors, or considering surrogacy and want more support with the emotional and decision‑making side of this journey, that’s exactly what we do inside The Building Your Family Community. You’ll find the link in the description. Guest resources: Website: https://www.terrafertility.com/ #IVF #Fertility #Infertility #FertilityTreatment #DiminishedOvarianReserve #RecurrentImplantationFailure #RecurrentPregnancyLoss #Endometriosis #FertilityDoctor #FertilitySupport #FertilityJourney #IVFSupport #TryingToConceive #FertilityClinic #FamilyBuilding
#177
May 10 · 53 min
Toxins & Fertility How to Think About Chemicals with the Co‑Founder of Green Chemistry
Unexplained infertility. Failed cycles. Constant “what ifs” about plastics, products, and the environments we live in. We’re surrounded by headlines about “toxins” and especially worried about how they might affect fertility, but almost no one teaches us how to think clearly about any of it. In this episode, Lisa Schuman, LCSW, talks with Dr. John Warner, a founder of Green Chemistry, about how everyday materials may influence fertility and health, and how to think about risk without spiraling into fear. Dr. Warner shares the personal tragedy that pushed him to re‑invent how chemistry is taught and practiced, and together they explore what realistic, informed choices look like for people in fertility treatment, donor conception, and surrogacy. You’ll hear about: How environmental exposures intersect with fertility and overall health The “devastating realization” that changed Dr. Warner’s career What Green Chemistry is and why it matters for future parents Why testing chemicals is so complex (and why “no data” ≠ “safe”) How to ask better questions instead of panicking about “toxins” The four pillars of chemistry education and “intellectual ecology” How consumer choices quietly shape what companies create next Why fear itself can become toxic and block clear decision‑making If you’re going through IVF, using donor conception, working with a surrogate, or pregnant after infertility, this conversation offers a calmer, clearer way to think about your environment, without chasing perfection or drowning in guilt. Guest resources Website: https://johnwarner.org/ Chapters 00:00 The Impact of Environment on Fertility 03:42 John Warner's Journey to Green Chemistry 08:33 The Birth of Green Chemistry 15:43 Practical Steps for a Healthier Life 19:31 The Challenge of Testing and Regulation 25:58 Finding Reliable Information on Toxicity 27:51 The Four Pillars of Chemistry Education 29:00 Intellectual Ecology in Chemistry 30:08 Navigating Public Skepticism 32:55 Finding Balance in Information 34:54 Making Informed Choices 36:27 Embracing Chemistry in Daily Life 39:22 Consumer Responsibility and Market Influence 42:20 Understanding Marketing and Product Labels 45:45 Overcoming Chemophobia and Embracing Chemistry 49:39 The Role of Fear in Consumer Choices #fertility #IVF #donorconception #greenchemistry #environmentaltoxins #infertility #womenshealth #familybuilding #eggdonation #surrogacy
#176
May 3 · 20 min
When You’re Not the Genetic Parent: Staying Connected as a Couple
If you’re building your family through donor conception and one of you is not genetically related to your child, this episode is for you. Lisa Schuman, LCSW, unpacks the real emotional challenges non-genetically related parents face: jealousy, insecurity, fear of being “less than,” and the quiet worry about connection and bonding. She walks you through five key suggestions for navigating these feelings together, so you can protect your relationship and your future family. You’ll learn: Why the non-genetic parent often gets overlooked, and how to change that How to talk openly about jealousy, insecurity, and grief The critical difference between privacy and secrecy in donor conception How to stay flexible as roles and feelings shift over time What the genetically linked parent needs emotionally, and how to support each other as a team This conversation is about intention, compassion, and clear communication so both parents feel seen, secure, and fully “real” in their role. If you want a strong relationship and a healthy environment for your donor-conceived child, start here. Get free resources on donor conception here: https://familybuilding.net/free-downloads/ 00:00 Introduction to Donor Conception and Parenting Dynamics 01:44 Challenges for Non-Genetically Related Parents 02:59 Navigating Emotional Complexities 06:05 Five Key Suggestions for Couples 08:18 The Importance of Open Communication 10:16 Privacy vs. Secrecy in Family Building 12:04 Creating a Supportive Environment 14:36 Flexibility in Parenting Roles 15:06 Recognizing the Genetically Linked Parent's Role 17:16 Normalizing Feelings in Parenting 18:46 The Importance of Intention and Communication
#175
April 26 · 37 min
Proactive Fertility: When To Get Checked, Freeze Eggs & Plan Ahead | Dr. Shefali Shastri, RMA NJ
Most people only meet a fertility specialist in crisis mode. In this episode, Dr. Shefali Shastri, Clinical Director and Physician Partner at RMA New Jersey, explains what proactive fertility actually looks like. Dr. Shastri is a board‑certified reproductive endocrinologist who has helped bring thousands of babies into the world since joining RMA New Jersey in 2009. Inspired by her OB/GYN mother, she now combines cutting‑edge science with deeply personal, patient‑centered care. We cover: • Who should consider a fertility workup before trying • How to understand your “fertility age” vs your birthday age • What a proactive fertility checkup actually includes (hormones, AMH, ultrasound, semen analysis, basic genetic screening, etc.) • Red flags where you should not “wait a year” • Egg freezing, preimplantation genetic testing, and underlying genetic causes of infertility • Exercise, weight, stress and movement for fertility • Specific guidance for single parents by choice, queer couples, and people planning for donor conception or surrogacy • How to turn fear of “bad news” into informed, empowered decisions If you’re not trying yet but want options later, or you’re already in treatment and feeling stuck, this conversation will give you a clear, compassionate roadmap. Connect: • Learn more about Dr. Shastri and RMA New Jersey: https://rmanetwork.com/staff/shefali-mavani-shastri/ • Follor Dr. Shastri on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/shefalishastrimd/ • Get my proactive fertility & family‑building resources:https://familybuilding.net/free-downloads/
#174
April 19 · 43 min
National Infertility Awareness Week: RESOLVE, Queer & Solo Parents, and How Your Story Changes Policy
National Infertility Awareness Week is about more than awareness posts. It is about whose stories get heard, who gets left out, and how we turn lived experience into better policy for everyone building their family. In this episode, I’m joined by Danielle, the new CEO of RESOLVE: The National Infertility Association. We talk about what RESOLVE is really doing behind the scenes, how they’re supporting single parents by choice and queer families, and why telling your story is one of the most powerful forms of advocacy you have. We also get practical: how to advocate for yourself at work, how to approach HR about fertility benefits, and how to find common ground in a divided moment so we can actually move legislation forward. We cover: What RESOLVE does for patients beyond social media during NIAW How current policies help some groups and still miss singles and LGBTQ+ families Concrete RESOLVE resources for talking to HR about fertility coverage Advocating for yourself at work without risking everything Using your story to build empathy, shift culture, and influence lawmakers Finding common ground across differences as a path to better legislation If you’re a single parent by choice, part of a queer couple, or anyone navigating reproductive medicine who has ever felt invisible, this conversation is for you. Episode resources Resolve: https://resolve.org/ National Infertility Awareness week: https://www.infertilityawareness.org/
#173
April 12 · 13 min
What To Do With Unused Embryos: Options, Big Feelings & A 3‑Step Path Forward
Deciding what to do with unused embryos after IVF can feel overwhelming, lonely, and loaded with grief. In this episode, we talk honestly about the emotional weight of unused embryos and why so many people get stuck here for years. I walk through the most common options clinics offer, explain what each one actually means, and introduce additional paths like compassionate transfer and using ritual when none of the standard choices feel right for you. Then I share a simple 3‑step system to help you move forward when you feel completely stuck, so you can make decisions that align with your values and find some peace with whatever you choose. In this episode you’ll learn: Why unused embryos bring up such big and conflicting feelings What your clinic’s standard options really involve (storage, donation, research, disposal, and more) What a compassionate transfer is and when it may be offered How ritual and meaning‑making can help with grief around unused embryos A practical 3‑step process to move from paralysis to the next right decision for you If you’re facing decisions about unused embryos and feel torn, this conversation is for you. You are not alone, and there is a way through. For more support around IVF, donor conception, and surrogacy, check the links in the show notes.
#172
April 5 · 49 min
Jenna Wolfe on Building a Two‑Mom Family, Donor Conception & Coming Out on TV
Journalist and TV anchor Jenna Wolfe joins therapist Lisa Schuman to share how she built a two‑mom family through fertility treatment and donor conception, came out on the Today Show, navigated a double mastectomy after a BRCA diagnosis, divorced, and is now co‑parenting two daughters. This episode is for anyone using reproductive medicine, or donor conception and worries, “Will my family really be OK?” We walk step‑by‑step through Jenna’s story: • Coming out publicly while pregnant and what she was most afraid of • Meeting her wife, deciding to have kids, and whose genetics to use • Fertility treatment in the public eye and choosing a sperm donor • Facing a double mastectomy as a new mom and talking to her kids about it • Divorce, building a healthy co‑parenting relationship, and focusing forward on the children • Small, doable changes that helped her get through fertility, surgery, and starting over If you’re building your family with fertility treatment, or donor conception, and want more structured support, you can learn about the Building Your Family education and support platform here: https://familybuilding.net/building-your-family-community/ This episode is sponsored by Seattle Sperm Bank, a donor sperm bank focused on rigorous screening, a wide donor selection, and thoughtful support for LGBTQ+ and solo parents. Learn more here: https://www.seattlespermbank.com/building-your-family/
#171
March 29 · 20 min
‘Screw It’ Moments in Fertility: How Stress Quietly Shapes Your Family-Building Choices
When you’re going through fertility treatment, donor conception, or surrogacy, it’s completely normal to hit a point where you think, “Ugh… screw it.” In this solo episode, Lisa Schuman names and explains the “Screw It Principle”: the quiet ways stress, exhaustion, jealousy, and resentment slip into big decisions about clinics, donors, and agencies. She breaks down the two versions of “screw it” moments, why they feel so good in the moment, and how they can slowly pull you away from your deepest values for yourself and your future child. You’ll learn: The two types of “screw it” decisions and how they show up in fertility, donor conception, and surrogacy How decision fatigue, jealousy, and burnout push you toward what feels comforting instead of what matches your long-term values A simple two-question checkpoint to catch “screw it” moments in real time How to gently redirect that “I’m done” energy into safer places, without judging yourself Lisa also shares a free Stress Tools Guide to help you calm your nervous system when you feel burned out, angry, or jealous, so you can return to big choices with more clarity and self-compassion. She also points you to SART, a resource for looking up official U.S. IVF clinic data so you can better align clinic choices with your values, not just your stress level. You are not weak for having “screw it” moments. You’re human. This episode helps you notice them before they quietly steer the parts of your family-building journey that matter most. Episode resources Grab your free ebook here: https://familybuilding.net/free-downloads/ Society for Assisted Reproductive Technology (SART) - https://www.sart.org/ Fertility and Sterility: https://www.fertstert.org/

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