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BraveCo Podcast

BraveCo

BraveCo Podcast is here to serve a collective of men pursuing wholeness, purpose, and brotherhood.

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  • 22 episodes
  • weekly
  • Avg 55 min
  • English
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  • Tuesday · 1 hr 6 min

    235: Kathy Vallotton - Casting Out Demons in Our Living Room & Smuggled Bibles Into Communist China

    This week on the podcast, I brought on my favorite guest of all time: my mom. I wanted to sit down with her and dig into some of the wildest stories from my childhood, the ones I've never really told on this show before, starting with the night a demon-possessed teenager showed up at our home group and my parents accidentally launched a deliverance ministry that would define our family for years. My mom walks me through it in her own words, along with the story of Tracy Evans, a missionary who survived being shot at, shipwrecked, and hunted in the Philippines, and who later brought a young woman, the spiritual daughter of Anton LaVey, to live in our house. From there we get into some of the most intense moments of my upbringing: a manifestation that turned violent and sent my mom running for her life, my sister Jamie's terrifying medical crisis when she started having seizures as a kid, and the time my two older sisters, ages 12 and 14, were sent to smuggle Bibles into Communist China, one of them getting interrogated for hours and the other getting separated from her group in the middle of the night. My mom also opens up about the hardest financial season of their lives, losing their business, owing 1.8 million dollars, and watching God provide through a string of miracles that included a banker forgiving their debt in tears. We close the conversation talking about her Parkinson's diagnosis seven years ago and how she refused to let it define her, choosing instead to go elk hunting at 500 yards, harvest a black bear with a crossbow, and keep showing up for life instead of shrinking back. This episode is really a tribute to her, to her faith, her grit, and the way she and my dad lived out the gospel in real, messy, unglamorous ways long before it was something either of them had figured out. If this episode encourages you, give your own mom a call, and if you enjoyed it, like, comment, subscribe, and share it with someone who needs to hear it. Stay brave. Chapters: 00:00 – Meet My Mom 06:36 – The Night Deliverance Ministry Was Born 13:14 – Taking In Anton LaVey's Daughter 19:54 – Growing Up Surrounded by Angels and Demons 26:31 – When "Susan" Turned Violent 33:13 – My Sister's Terrifying Seizure and a Demonic Attack 39:51 – Smuggling Bibles Into Communist China as Kids 46:28 – Leaving Weaverville and Losing Everything in Bankruptcy 53:05 – The Miracle That Saved Us From $1.8 Million in Debt 59:41 – Parkinson's, Hunting Adventures, and a Tribute to Mom CONNECT WITH BRAVECO Join Our Free Community for Men (ladies, sign up your man): https://www.braveco.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/braveco.men Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/braveco.men/ Shop: https://shop.braveco.org/ ABOUT BRAVECO: We live in a time where men are hunting for the truth and looking for the codebook to manhood. At BraveCo, we are on a mission to heal the narrative of masculinity across a generation; fighting the good fight together because every man should feel confident and capable of facing his pain, loving deeply, and leading a life that impacts the world around him.

  • August 25 · 30 min

    234: Why Every Real Man Needs His Faith Tested (Not Protected From It)

    If you've ever felt overwhelmed, triggered, or flooded by your emotions and reached for every tool in the book to regulate them, this episode is for me as much as it's for you. As a pastor and counselor, I talk a lot about self-awareness, objectivity, and positive self-talk, and those tools genuinely matter. But in this episode I want to hand you something bigger than a tool: a complete shift in how you interpret the season you're in. I walk through what I imagine an hour-long coaching session with God would sound like, and why a man whose faith has never been tested is a weak man. Using James 1 as a life verse, I break down why endurance, whether physical, emotional, or spiritual, is the only real process for growing into a stronger, more mature man. From there I get into the gym metaphor I use constantly with the guys in my life: nobody goes to the gym and calls themselves weak because the weights feel heavy. Resistance is the whole point. I talk about Jocko Willink's "Good" mindset, why we've been sold propaganda that life is supposed to be easy, and how living from a place of victory beats fighting for victory every single day. Then I get into the second, and honestly more foundational, key: how you see God. I dig into the moment Jesus was baptized and the Father declared, "This is my son in whom I am well pleased," before Jesus had performed a single miracle, and what that means for those of us who think we have to earn God's love through performance. I close out the episode with the great exchange from Philippians 4, trading our anxiety for God's peace, and why rejoicing isn't denial but actually a "cheat mode" that puts us into testimony mode, the spirit of prophecy that gives other people hope. I finish with a prayer over every man and woman listening, especially those carrying wounds from an absent father or a hard past, that this would be a season of breakthrough and restoration. If this episode encourages you, I'd love for you to rate, review, and share it with someone who needs it. Stay brave. Chapters: 00:00 – Welcome 03:02 – The Life Hack That Beats Every Emotional Regulation Tool 06:11 – Built Up, Not Broken Down 09:14 – The Gym Metaphor 12:19 – Living From Victory Instead of Fighting for It 15:20 – The Second Key 18:23 – What Jesus's Baptism Teaches Us About God's Love 21:25 – Practical Steps to a Deeper Connection With God 24:35 – The Great Exchange 27:36 – A Prayer for Breakthrough and Restoration CONNECT WITH BRAVECO Join Our Free Community for Men (ladies, sign up your man): https://www.braveco.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/braveco.men Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/braveco.men/ Shop: https://shop.braveco.org/ ABOUT BRAVECO: We live in a time where men are hunting for the truth and looking for the codebook to manhood. At BraveCo, we are on a mission to heal the narrative of masculinity across a generation; fighting the good fight together because every man should feel confident and capable of facing his pain, loving deeply, and leading a life that impacts the world around him.

  • August 18 · 1 hr

    232: Why Men Are Terrified of Their Emotions & How to Deal with Anxiety & Depression: Dr. Margaret Nagib

    I sit down with Dr. Margaret Nagib, a clinical psychologist and one of my most trusted friends, for a conversation I've wanted to have for a long time: how do you actually work through anxiety and depression as a man? Margaret breaks down why so many of us are struggling right now, from information overload to unprocessed childhood trauma, and explains what's really happening in your body and brain when you hit your window of tolerance. We get into the COVID season specifically, including her own story of telling God "I'm done" with the news, and how that moment shaped the way she now helps her clients regulate their emotions. The heart of this episode is a tool Margaret taught me that genuinely changed my life: recognize, relabel, refocus. I share exactly how I used radical thankfulness to pull myself out of anxiety spirals during one of the hardest seasons of my life, tapering off medication I'd been on for eight years while caring for a newborn. Margaret explains why fighting anxious thoughts only makes them louder, why distraction is actually a healthy tool, and why "it's not me, it's anxiety" became the phrase that finally let me detach from the spiral instead of getting swept up in it. We also go deep on depression, including the medical side I didn't expect, like a severe vitamin D deficiency that mimicked major depressive symptoms, and I open up about a recent surgery that triggered a spiral of hopelessness I had to consciously fight my way out of. Margaret closes with the psychology of hope, the story of the rats who kept swimming, and why every man needs a "hope holder" in his life when he can't hold onto hope himself. If you've ever felt like anxiety or depression was something only you were dealing with, this conversation is for you. Chapters: 0:00 – Meet Dr. Margaret Nagib 6:04 – COVID Overload: When the News Became Too Much 12:06 – Why Men Are Taught to Suppress Their Emotions 18:07 – Anxiety Isn't a Problem to Solve, It's a Spiral to Exit 24:12 – Avoidance, Trauma, and Why We Run From Emotion 30:14 – The Power of Radical Thankfulness to Break Anxiety 36:15 – Mapping Your Anxiety Triggers Before They Hit 42:20 – Vitamin D, Medication, and the Medical Side of Depression 48:21 – Jason's Surgery Story: Catching Depression Before It Spirals 54:27 – Agency, Hope, and Finding Your "Hope Holder" Dr. Margaret Nagib is a speaker, author, and clinical Psychologist. In this episode, Jay and Margaret explain how to deal with anxiety and depression. You will be better equipped to respond to your triggers and regulate your emotions. Episode Notes: - We experience anxiety and depression when we are beyond our capacity to cope. - One of the most powerless feelings for a man is wanting to help someone without knowing how to help them. - Avoidance is a symptom of trauma - Hope is the overall perception that a goal can be met - A person filled with hope has high agency (belief in yourself) and multiple pathways (ways to get where you want to go) Margaret's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/margaretnagib/ CONNECT WITH BRAVECO Join Our Free Community for Men (ladies, sign up your man): https://www.braveco.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/braveco.men Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/braveco.men/ Shop: https://shop.braveco.org/ ABOUT BRAVECO: We live in a time where men are hunting for the truth and looking for the codebook to manhood. At BraveCo, we are on a mission to heal the narrative of masculinity across a generation; fighting the good fight together because every man should feel confident and capable of facing his pain, loving deeply, and leading a life that impacts the world around him.

  • August 11 · 47 min

    231: How to Turn Your Son Into a Man: A Father's Complete Guide

    This week I brought on my good friend Cole, who's raising three boys and a daughter, to dig into something that's been on my heart for a long time: how do we actually turn a boy into a man? We get into the real, practical side of fatherhood, from a flag football cheating scandal that turned into a life lesson on his sideline, to the conversation I had with my own son about learning to think and problem-solve instead of having every issue solved for him. Cole and I talk about how "becoming a man" isn't a single moment, it's language and intentionality threaded through everyday interactions, from sports to chores to the hard conversations nobody wants to have. We also get into why so many kids today grow up feeling unnecessary instead of needed, tracing the shift from the agricultural age, where a child's contribution literally put food on the table, all the way to today's information age, where kids can go their whole childhood without ever feeling essential to the family. I share the story of building what we call a family "ethos," teaching my kids what it means to be a Valentin, and how identity like that shapes behavior far more than rules ever could. And then I get real about one of the hardest seasons of my life as a dad: the moment my 17-year-old son decided to move out because he wanted more responsibility, and what happened over the year that followed, spaghetti dinners, blown budgets, and all. This conversation isn't about having it all figured out. It's about being willing to pay the personal price it takes to disciple your kids well, even when it costs you a practice, a peaceful evening, or your own comfort. If you're a dad in the thick of raising boys, or even if your kids are grown and you're wondering how you can still show up for the young men around you, this episode is for you. And don't forget, our Foundations of Masculinity course and our Sexuality and Relationships course are both completely free at braveco.org. Thanks for listening, and we'll see you next week. Chapters: 00:00 - Intro: Why Masculinity Matters Today 02:00 - The Role of a Father in Training Sons 05:10 - Teaching Responsibility: A Father’s Approach 08:35 - Sports as a Tool for Life Lessons 13:20 - How Vision Shapes Responsibility in Young Men 16:40 - Creating a Family Ethos 22:15 - Sacrifice as a Parent: The Cost of Discipleship 30:00 - Letting Your Kids Learn Through Challenges 36:10 - Navigating Tough Conversations with Teens 42:00 - Free Tools to Support Fathers and Mentors Connect with Cole Zick: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/colezick/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/cczick CONNECT WITH BRAVECO Join Our Free Community for Men (ladies, sign up your man): https://www.braveco.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/braveco.men Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/braveco.men/ Shop: https://shop.braveco.org/ ABOUT BRAVECO: We live in a time where men are hunting for the truth and looking for the codebook to manhood. At BraveCo, we are on a mission to heal the narrative of masculinity across a generation; fighting the good fight together because every man should feel confident and capable of facing his pain, loving deeply, and leading a life that impacts the world around him.

  • August 4 · 41 min

    230: What Happened to Men Since the 1960s Sexual Revolution Will Shock You

    This episode is lesson one from our Foundations of Masculinity course. I start with a true story out of Kruger National Park in 1993, where wildlife officials relocated a group of young male elephants without any older males to guide them. Within a few years, rangers started finding endangered white rhinos brutally killed, not by poachers, but by these juvenile elephants who had no elder to show them how to act. The second they flew in a few older bull elephants, the chaos stopped. When I first heard that story, it hit me like a truck, because it's exactly what's happening to men in our culture today. From there, I trace how we got here, starting with the sexual revolution of the 1960s and Woodstock's "free love" philosophy, and how removing responsibility and courtship from relationships between men and women actually backfired, leading to a massive spike in fatherlessness that's still wrecking families today. I break down the real difference between being male, being masculine, and being a manly man, and why manhood isn't something you're born with, it's something that has to be poured into you by other men. I also get personal, sharing my own dad's story of growing up without a father and how my grandfather, a hardworking farmer, shaped an entire ethos around what it means to be a man, even without ever using the word "masculinity." By the end of this episode, I dig into what Scripture actually says about a man's role, starting in Genesis, and I talk honestly about the different but equally valuable roles men and women carry, using some pretty relatable stories from my own marriage and home along the way. If you've ever felt confused about what it means to be a man in today's world, or if you've caught yourself acting more like a "man boy" chasing short-term gratification instead of long-term reward, this episode is for you. I close it out with a prayer over every man listening. Thanks for tuning in, and if this episode hits home, share it with a friend who needs to hear it. Stay brave, and we'll see you next week. Chapters: 00:00 – Welcome 04:09 – The Elephant Story: What It Teaches Us About Fatherless Men 08:11 – The Sexual Revolution's Broken Promise 12:22 – Toxic Masculinity vs. True Manhood: The Confusion Today 16:32 – What Manliness Really Means: Jesus as the Model 20:42 – Man Boys: When Selfishness Never Grows Up 24:54 – My Grandfather's Farm: A Lesson in Manly Work Ethic 29:01 – The Sump Pump Story: A Man's God-Given Responsibility 33:12 – Different Roles, Equal Value: Men and Women by Design 37:17 – Don't Suppress Your Masculinity: A Prayer for Every Man CONNECT WITH BRAVECO Join Our Free Community for Men (ladies, sign up your man): https://www.braveco.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/braveco.men Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/braveco.men/ Shop: https://shop.braveco.org/ ABOUT BRAVECO: We live in a time where men are hunting for the truth and looking for the codebook to manhood. At BraveCo, we are on a mission to heal the narrative of masculinity across a generation; fighting the good fight together because every man should feel confident and capable of facing his pain, loving deeply, and leading a life that impacts the world around him.

  • July 27 · 1 hr 23 min

    229: John Eldredge | The 6 Stages Every Man Must Pass Through & How to Actually Hear the Voice of God

    This episode comes straight from our BraveCo conference. John open's by walking through one of my favorite overlooked stories in Scripture: the resurrection morning where Jesus spends his first hours back from the dead playing what can only be described as practical jokes on his closest friends. If you've never noticed Jesus's sense of humor in the text, I promise once you see it, you can't unsee it, and it changes how you relate to Him. From there, John lays out a framework I've spent years developing: the masculine journey through the stages of beloved son, cowboy, warrior, lover, king, and sage. John uses David and Goliath, stories from his own life growing up on my grandfather's cattle ranch, and even a scene from Kingdom of Heaven to show how God doesn't just drop courage and identity on us out of nowhere. He initiates us through real experiences, one stage at a time, and most of us are walking around as unfinished men still needing to be built up in one of these areas, whether that's beloved-ness, adventure, the fight with our enemy, or learning to truly know our wife's heart. The second half of this talk is where John get's really practical, because none of this framework matters if you can't hear your Father's voice for yourself. John shares some of the wildest, most personal stories of God speaking to me, through a nalgene bottle, an underwear tag, and a canceled sermon that turned out to save me from disaster, and then John walk's the room through simple, no-pressure ways to start recognizing his voice in your own life. We close together in a guided time of prayer, facing our fears, asking the Father hard questions, and breaking agreements we've made with the enemy about who we are as men. If you're hungry for more of God and tired of trying to figure life out on your own, this one is for you. Stay brave, and I'll see you next week. Chapters: 00:00 – Welcome 08:04 – You Are a Son 16:20 – How God Initiates Men Through Experience 24:21 – The Beloved Son Stage 32:35 – Eve, Beauty & Why Your Wife Needs God, Not Just You 40:42 – God Isn't as Religious as You Think 48:48 – The Key to Everything 56:59 – How to Actually Hear God Speak 1:05:04 – Facing Your Fears & Letting God In 1:13:14 – Warrior Prayer: Breaking Agreements With the Enemy CONNECT WITH BRAVECO Join Our Free Community for Men (ladies, sign up your man): https://www.braveco.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/braveco.men Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/braveco.men/ Shop: https://shop.braveco.org/ ABOUT BRAVECO: We live in a time where men are hunting for the truth and looking for the codebook to manhood. At BraveCo, we are on a mission to heal the narrative of masculinity across a generation; fighting the good fight together because every man should feel confident and capable of facing his pain, loving deeply, and leading a life that impacts the world around him.

  • July 20 · 1 hr 21 min

    228: Why Do Most Men Have No Real Process for Dealing With Pain? Here's what to do!

    This week's Brave Co episode is from my time teaching at Danny Silk's Keep Your Love On University. I dig into a question I ask almost everyone I talk to: what's your actual process for dealing with pain? Most men, even tough guys, don't have a real answer, they just medicate with food, alcohol, work, or scrolling, and I walk through why that always backfires, using James 1, the picture of a farmer sowing in tears, and a hunting analogy about always taking the hard way instead of the easy way. I get personal in this one and tell the full story of finding out my wife was having an affair, what it felt like to want to eject from my whole life with three kids depending on me, and why I eventually realized there was no shortcut, only one path through the pain. I break down why hope and vision matter more than willpower, including the wild "Rat With Hope" experiment and why couples I counsel don't need me to fix their old marriage, they need vision for a new one. Then I shift into forgiveness, probably the most misused word in the church, and explain why "just give it to Jesus" or "nail it to the cross" doesn't actually work if you've never processed the pain underneath it. By the end, I lay out the five real steps I use and teach couples and individuals to actually work through pain and get to genuine forgiveness rooted in compassion, not obligation. This episode runs long because we did a full teaching plus Q&A, but if you've ever felt stuck reliving the same pain over and over, this gives you an actual framework, not just theory. Stay brave out there. Chapters: 00:00 – Why Most Men Have No Real Process for Pain 08:12 – The Farmer's Mindset: Why Sowing in Tears Leads to a Harvest 16:24 – The Ecosystem You Inherited: Where Your Coping Skills Really Came From 24:33 – My Story: Discovering My Wife's Affair and Wanting to Eject 32:44 – Why Quick Fixes Are the Fastest Path to a Miserable Life 40:51 – Hope Energizes, Vision Sustains: The Rat With Hope Experiment 49:02 – You Have More Capacity Than You Think: Perseverance and Identity 57:12 – Why "Just Forgive Them" Doesn't Work (And Never Did) 1:05:25 – What Jesus on the Cross Teaches Us About Real Forgiveness 1:13:38 – The 5 Steps to Process Pain and Forgive From Compassion CONNECT WITH BRAVECO Join Our Free Community for Men (ladies, sign up your man): https://www.braveco.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/braveco.men Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/braveco.men/ Shop: https://shop.braveco.org/ ABOUT BRAVECO: We live in a time where men are hunting for the truth and looking for the codebook to manhood. At BraveCo, we are on a mission to heal the narrative of masculinity across a generation; fighting the good fight together because every man should feel confident and capable of facing his pain, loving deeply, and leading a life that impacts the world around him.

  • July 13 · 52 min

    227: The Fatherlessness Epidemic: Why Your Pain Isn't Your Fault, But It Is Your Responsibility

    Connect with Sathiya: https://www.sathiyasam.com/ Jay and Sathiya both grew up in the church, and we both know what it's like when the emotional side of manhood gets either fully embraced or completely rejected. In this episode, we get into why fatherlessness, not war, addiction, or incarceration on their own, is actually the root issue behind almost every major crisis we see in families today, and why healing fathers is the only way to stop producing broken sons. We trace how the s*xual revolution of the 1960s and 70s quietly rewired an entire culture away from responsibility and toward instant gratification, and how that shift is still playing out in dating, marriage, and fatherlessness today. Jay also walks through something I think every man needs to hear: where you're at right now probably isn't your fault, but it is your responsibility to fix. He breaks down a real, practical five-step process for working through pain instead of just slapping a "blanket of forgiveness" over your whole life, including a raw personal story about processing his own divorce through journaling, and why forgiving from compassion is so much more powerful than forgiving out of pure obligation. Toward the end, we zoom out to talk about what actually changes a society: not just rules, but men rediscovering that responsibility, not happiness, is what gives life real purpose. Jay unpacks his framework for fatherhood, protect, provide, and promote, and explains what "promote" really means through the lens of discover, develop, deploy, the same process his own dad used to help him find his calling as a counselor at 13 years old. If you're a man carrying father wounds, or you're a dad trying to break a cycle before it starts, this episode gives you language and tools for both. Stay brave out there. Chapters 00:00 – Why Fatherlessness Is the World's #1 Issue 05:15 – The Fatherlessness Epidemic 10:27 – Why Taking Responsibility Breaks the Cycle of Fatherlessness 15:44 – How the Sexual Revolution Fueled a Fatherless Generation 21:02 – Taking Ownership of Your Healing 26:15 – Why Presence Beats Perfection as a Father 31:26 – Processing Real Pain Step by Step 36:47 – Why Silencing Your Inner Child's Pain Isn't Real Forgiveness 42:06 – Why Responsibility (Not Happiness) Gives Men Real Purpose 47:16 – Discover, Develop, Deploy: Building a Legacy That Outlives You CONNECT WITH BRAVECO Join Our Free Community for Men (ladies, sign up your man): https://www.braveco.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/braveco.men Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/braveco.men/ Shop: https://shop.braveco.org/ ABOUT BRAVECO: We live in a time where men are hunting for the truth and looking for the codebook to manhood. At BraveCo, we are on a mission to heal the narrative of masculinity across a generation; fighting the good fight together because every man should feel confident and capable of facing his pain, loving deeply, and leading a life that impacts the world around him.

  • July 6 · 1 hr 12 min

    226: RED FLAGS & GREEN FLAGS: How to Know If You're Ready to Date (Most People Get This Wrong) | Alley Vallotton

    I sat down with my daughter-in-law Alley for one of the most requested conversations on the Brave Co podcast: how to actually date well. We dig into why so few people were ever taught how to date, what it really means to be ready for a relationship, and why "dating yourself" first changes everything about how you show up for someone else. From there, Alley and I walk through defining the relationship instead of letting it drift "organically," why trust in marriage actually starts on your very first date, and how leading with intentionality removes so much of the anxiety that ruins modern dating. Then we get into the intimacy ladder, fourteen questions I've used to figure out whether someone is safe, fun, aligned in values, and ready to build a real future, including how to handle a partner's past, how to fight fair, and how to keep God (not each other) as your source of security. If you're dating, thinking about dating, or just want to understand why your relationship feels stuck at a certain level, this episode gives you a real framework instead of guesswork. Stay brave out there, and if this helped you, subscribe to the Brave Co podcast and share it with someone who needs it. Chapters: 00:00 – Welcome 07:08 – Are You Ready to Date? Learning to "Date Yourself" First 14:20 – Trust Starts on Day One, Not on Your Wedding Day 21:24 – Killing the "Organic Dating" Myth 28:36 – A Framework for Every Step of Dating 35:51 – "Is This the One?" 42:57 – Red Flags, Safe People, and Handling Someone's Past 50:05 – Insecurity, Neediness, and Keeping God in the God Spot 57:16 – Conflict Skills: How Couples Learn to Fight Fair 1:04:27 – Unconditional Love, Win-Win, and Why "Forever Isn't Long Enough" CONNECT WITH BRAVECO Join Our Free Community for Men (ladies, sign up your man): https://www.braveco.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/braveco.men Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/braveco.men/ Shop: https://shop.braveco.org/ ABOUT BRAVECO: We live in a time where men are hunting for the truth and looking for the codebook to manhood. At BraveCo, we are on a mission to heal the narrative of masculinity across a generation; fighting the good fight together because every man should feel confident and capable of facing his pain, loving deeply, and leading a life that impacts the world around him.

  • June 30 · 46 min

    225: John Eldridge on Battle, Adventure & Beauty: What Every Man's Heart Is Desperately Craving

    This week's episode is something special — it's John Eldridge's live message from our Brave Co conference, and it is one of the most powerful things I've ever witnessed delivered to a room full of men. John opens with Proverbs 4:23 and builds an entire framework around a single, urgent idea: the heart is the center of everything. Your ability to love, to fight, to chase your calling, to win your kids, to find joy — all of it flows from your heart. And if your heart has been shut down, beaten up, or buried under years of performance and pain, nothing else in your life is going to work the way God designed it to. John walks through three things wired into the masculine soul — battle, adventure, and beauty — and what happens when men lose access to them. He does a live exercise with the room around favorite movies that is genuinely one of the most illuminating things I've ever seen, showing how story is the language of the heart and how the films we love are whispering clues about our true identity and mission. He also takes on the emasculated version of Jesus that most men have been handed by the church — the soft, religious, timid figure who no man would actually follow into battle — and replaces it with the fierce, brilliant, playful, deeply human Jesus of the Gospels. The core of this message is a call to wholeheartedness — not more discipline, not more willpower, but the actual restoration of the heart that Jesus came to accomplish. John is a therapist with 30 years of experience and thousands of men behind him, and he is not speaking in theory. He's speaking from the trenches of his own story. If you are a man who has been grinding hard and still feeling like something essential is missing, this message is for you. Please share it, leave a comment, and subscribe so more men can hear it. Stay brave. 00:00 – Welcome 04:41 – Gender, the Masculine Soul, and the Image of God You Carry 09:22 – The Glory of God Is Man Fully Alive 14:03 – What Your Favorite Movies Reveal About Your Soul and True Identity 18:44 – Yahweh Is a Warrior 23:25 – The Emasculation Crisis 28:06 – The Real Jesus 32:47 – Adventure Is Food 37:28 – Beauty, Sexuality, and the Assault on the Masculine Heart 42:09 – Wholeheartedness Is the Goal CONNECT WITH BRAVECO Join Our Free Community for Men (ladies, sign up your man): https://www.braveco.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/braveco.men Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/braveco.men/ Shop: https://shop.braveco.org/ ABOUT BRAVECO: We live in a time where men are hunting for the truth and looking for the codebook to manhood. At BraveCo, we are on a mission to heal the narrative of masculinity across a generation; fighting the good fight together because every man should feel confident and capable of facing his pain, loving deeply, and leading a life that impacts the world around him.

  • June 22 · 1 hr 7 min

    224: Todd Pierce: Unfiltered Reality of Professional Rodeo Life & My Marriage Breaking Point

    Connect with Todd: https://www.ridinghighministries.org/about In this episode, I sit down with one of my best friends on the planet, Todd Pierce — a former professional bareback rider who competed in over 100 rodeos a year and now runs Riding High Ministries, where he breaks wild horses in front of live audiences as a living picture of man's relationship with God. Todd takes us inside the brutal world of professional rodeo: the borrowed gear, the 15-plus knockouts, the broken bones, the nights driving through the dark eating hot dogs just to get to the next event. But what really hits different is hearing him talk about what the rodeo life couldn't prepare him for — being a husband and a father who actually shows up emotionally. What makes Todd's story so powerful is that he spent years doing ministry — real, sincere, devoted ministry — and still giving surface-level answers to deeply hurting men. It wasn't until he discovered tools around emotional intelligence, culture of honor, and the courage to say "I don't know what I'm doing" that things started to shift. Hearing him describe the moment his son Colton sat him down and told him what it was like to grow up with him — and watching Todd actually receive it instead of deflect it — is one of the most honest and healing things I've ever witnessed in a man. If you've ever felt like you were doing everything right and still falling short at home, this episode is for you. Todd and I get into how men unknowingly inherit an operating system they never chose, why toughness without vulnerability will cost you the people you love most, and what it actually looks like to create a new culture in your marriage, your parenting, and your walk with God. This conversation will challenge you and, I believe, set something free in you. Stay brave. Chapters: 00:00 – Welcome to Brave Co 06:47 – From Racehorse Jockey to First-Time Rodeo Competitor 13:34 – The Raw, Unfiltered Reality of Professional Rodeo Life 20:21 – Knocked Out and Dragged 27:08 – When Toughness Stops Working 33:55 – Injury, End of Career, and the Start of Something New 40:42 – The Operating System You Never Chose 47:29 – The First Truly Courageous Thing He Ever Did 54:16 – Healing Through Hard Conversations With Your Wife and Kids 1:01:03 – Living Transparent and a Prayer Over Every Man Listening CONNECT WITH BRAVECO Join Our Free Community for Men (ladies, sign up your man): https://www.braveco.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/braveco.men Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/braveco.men/ Shop: https://shop.braveco.org/ ABOUT BRAVECO: We live in a time where men are hunting for the truth and looking for the codebook to manhood. At BraveCo, we are on a mission to heal the narrative of masculinity across a generation; fighting the good fight together because every man should feel confident and capable of facing his pain, loving deeply, and leading a life that impacts the world around him.

  • June 15 · 1 hr 37 min

    223: She Asked Her Husband to K*ll Her. Here's What Chronic Illness, PTSD & Marriage Actually Look Like

    Connect with Abi: https://www.instagram.com/abistumvoll/ I don't bring many women onto BraveCo, but when I do, it's because they have something that men need to hear — something they won't get anywhere else. Abby Stumble is one of my oldest and most trusted friends, and this conversation is one of the most honest ones I've ever had on this podcast. Abby grew up thinking she had a great childhood. She was wrong. A mentally ill, drug-addicted mother. A home full of chaos she internalized as her own failure. Panic attacks, suicidal thoughts, self-hatred, and a body she despised — all without a single clear explanation for why. It wasn't until she was 37 that the real story started to unravel. And what happened next changed everything she thought she knew about herself, her marriage, and what healing actually looks like. We go deep into marriage in this one — specifically what happened when two beautiful train-wrecks decided to build a life together. Abby and Justin's story is a masterclass in how broken attachment cycles play out in real relationships: the avoidant man who disappears, the anxious woman who picks fights just to pull him back, and both of them trauma-bonding through explosions they thought was just how love worked. Sound familiar? We unpack the exact moment their marriage started to change — and it wasn't a big dramatic breakthrough. It was ownership. Honesty without shame. Vulnerability that didn't demand rescue. And I share my own piece of this too, because for years I went home every night feeling like a boy, not a man — isolated, ashamed, and slowly drowning while Lauren watched me disappear. This is the conversation that brings all of that into the open. And then Abby goes somewhere I didn't expect. She tells the story of a season four years ago when she was so sick she couldn't walk ten feet, had lost thirty pounds, and begged Justin — through genuine physical torment — to end her suffering. What she learned in that dark place about present-moment living, nervous system regulation, collecting moments of good, and training your brain to attach to safety instead of pain is some of the most practical, life-changing content I've ever heard. If you're in a hard season right now — with your health, your marriage, your emotions, or your sense of who you are as a man — this episode is for you. Stay Brave. Chapters: 00:00 – Welcome to BraveCo 09:44 – Growing Up in Chaos 19:27 – The Slow Unraveling 29:11 – Two Trainwrecks, One Marriage 38:54 – Jason's Story 48:38 – The Vulnerability Men Fear Most 58:21 – Small Steps, Big Culture 1:08:05 – When the Body Breaks Down 1:17:48 – Regulating the Nervous System 1:27:32 – The Tiny Things, The Future With Hope, and a Prayer Over Every Person Listening CONNECT WITH BRAVECO Join Our Free Community for Men (ladies, sign up your man): https://www.braveco.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/braveco.men Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/braveco.men/ Shop: https://shop.braveco.org/ ABOUT BRAVECO: We live in a time where men are hunting for the truth and looking for the codebook to manhood. At BraveCo, we are on a mission to heal the narrative of masculinity across a generation; fighting the good fight together because every man should feel confident and capable of facing his pain, loving deeply, and leading a life that impacts the world around him.

  • June 8 · 1 hr 10 min

    222: Dr. John Delony | What Your Anxiety Is Actually Trying to Tell You & The 6 Daily Choices To Make

    Website: johndeloney.com Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/johndelony/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/JohnDelony/ Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@johndelony Youtube Channel: @TheDrJohnDelonyShow I don't say this lightly — I finished this book in a single day. Dr. John Delony's Building a Non-Anxious Life is one of the most practical, honest, and genuinely helpful things I've put in front of the men who follow Brave Co. And before I even started asking questions, I had to be upfront with John about something: anxiety hasn't just been an academic topic for me. It's been my life. From OCD as a kid that I couldn't name, to coping in ways I'm not proud of, to a full nervous breakdown — I've spent years clawing my way out of a hole I didn't fully understand until much later. That's exactly why this conversation matters so much to me. Dr. Delony has two PhDs, has worked in mental health for decades, and somehow manages to take the most complex stuff about how our brains and bodies work and make it simple enough to act on. In this episode, we unpack what anxiety actually is — not a disease, not a character flaw, not a broken brain — but a smoke detector. A signal. Your body working exactly the way it was designed to work to get your attention about something that isn't right in your world. We talk about the ticker tape of shame that runs under most men's lives, why so many high-achieving guys are secretly falling apart, what it means to actually love yourself, and why you absolutely cannot do this alone. Dr. Delony also walks us through his six daily choices framework — Choose Reality, Choose Connection, Choose Freedom, Choose Health and Healing, Choose Mindfulness, and Choose Belief — and we get into the ones that hit me hardest personally. If you're a man who has ever felt like you're behind, like you're not doing enough, like no matter what you accomplish it still doesn't feel like it's working — this episode is going to stop you in your tracks. Go grab the book. Take the anxiety test at johndeloney.com. And stay brave. Chapters: 00:00 – Jason Gets Personal About His Own Battle With Anxiety 07:02 – Your Body Isn't Broken — It's Working Exactly as Designed 14:05 – We've Built a World Our Bodies Can't Survive In 21:07 – What Anxiety Actually Is 28:09 – The Ticker Tape Lie 35:12 – The Real Cheat Code 42:14 – The 6 Daily Choices 49:16 – Freedom, Health and Healing, and the Power of Mindfulness 56:19 – Why Self-Actualization Is a Myth 1:03:21 – What Are You Really Worth? CONNECT WITH BRAVECO Join Our Free Community for Men (ladies, sign up your man): https://www.braveco.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/braveco.men Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/braveco.men/ Shop: https://shop.braveco.org/ ABOUT BRAVECO: We live in a time where men are hunting for the truth and looking for the codebook to manhood. At BraveCo, we are on a mission to heal the narrative of masculinity across a generation; fighting the good fight together because every man should feel confident and capable of facing his pain, loving deeply, and leading a life that impacts the world around him.

  • June 1 · 1 hr 12 min

    221: Michael Koulianos - When You Can't Feel God Anymore — What the Bible Actually Says About It

    Connect with Michael: https://michaelkoulianos.org/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michaelkoulianos/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MichaelKoulianos1/ Youtube: https://studio.youtube.com/channel/UCBKurdZlFEMaLdwxSYMRNAw I'll be honest — I almost didn't record this episode the way I did. Because it required me to sit across from one of my closest friends and one of the most gifted men I know when it comes to the presence of God, and admit that I've been struggling. Struggling to feel connected. Struggling to cultivate that place with the Holy Spirit that I know I'm supposed to have — especially after walking through five weeks of watching my mother-in-law die of cancer. That's not an easy thing to say as a pastor. But I said it anyway. And what Michael gave me back was one of the most practically powerful and spiritually deep conversations I've ever had on this podcast. Michael Koulianos leads Jesus Image, a church and global movement, and there is genuinely no one I know who flows in the presence of God the way he does. In this episode, he walks us through his personal morning prayer routine — two hours, early, consistent for 20 years — and breaks down exactly what it looks like: silence, Bible reading from Genesis to Revelation looking for Jesus the whole way, worship, and a prayer list he's been building for years with names being crossed off one by one. But more than the mechanics, he talks about what it means to feel God's presence not as an emotional high but as a continual awareness. And he talks about mourning — why giving yourself permission to grieve is actually the door that opens to the Holy Spirit's comfort. We also get into the real cost of leading a movement, the false sense of responsibility that burns leaders out, what God is actually doing on the earth right now, and why the cross isn't just the starting point of the Christian life — it's the whole shape of it. If you're a man who's been running on empty spiritually, or you've been grinding so hard you've lost the thread of why you started, this episode will recalibrate you. Carve out the time to watch the whole thing. It's worth every minute. Chapters: 00:00 – Welcome: Jason Gets Honest 07:15 – Little Ezra, Grief, and Why Mourning Opens the Door 14:31 – Sensing vs. Feeling 21:46 – Inside Michael's Morning Routine 29:01 – Prayer Lists, John Eldridge, and Hearing God's Promises 36:16 – How to Find Jesus in Every Page of Scripture 43:32 – The Hardest Part of Leading a Movement 50:47 – Burnout, Boundaries, His Church Doubling While Michael Couldn't Speak 58:02 – What God Is Doing on Earth Right Now 1:05:17 – Living on His Mission, the Cross-Shaped Life & Closing Prayer CONNECT WITH BRAVECO Join Our Free Community for Men (ladies, sign up your man): https://www.braveco.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/braveco.men Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/braveco.men/ Shop: https://shop.braveco.org/ ABOUT BRAVECO: We live in a time where men are hunting for the truth and looking for the codebook to manhood. At BraveCo, we are on a mission to heal the narrative of masculinity across a generation; fighting the good fight together because every man should feel confident and capable of facing his pain, loving deeply, and leading a life that impacts the world around him.

  • May 25 · 1 hr 9 min

    220: John Eldredge: The Wounded Boy Inside Every Grown Man | Adam's Failure Is Still Destroying Men Today

    This week's Brave Co podcast is a moment I've been waiting to share with you guys — John Eldredge live from our BraveCo conference last year, and I'm telling you, this one carries weight. John takes us all the way back to Adam in the garden and shows us how the original failure of masculinity — passivity, the failure to engage — is still being passed down through every generation of men. He unpacks the fig leaf every man wears, why what you meet when you meet a man is rarely his true heart, and how the poser inside of us is quietly keeping us from the life God designed us for. John gets vulnerable about his own story — growing up as the only son of an alcoholic father, the trips to the river that ended, the police station ride home in absolute silence, and the vow he made as a teenager that he would never trust anyone. He talks about the wound every boy carries, the two questions every man is secretly asking — am I loved, and do I have what it takes — and how the way those questions were answered in our childhood is still shaping who we are today. If you've ever wondered why you medicate with work, alcohol, sex, or constant achievement, John explains it with a clarity I haven't heard anywhere else. The back half of the episode moves into one of the most powerful guided prayer experiences I've ever sat in. John walks every man through inviting Jesus into the wounded places, forgiving the people who hurt us, breaking the agreements we've made about ourselves, and letting the older us finally bless the younger boy we've been ashamed of for years. This is sacred ground. Sit with it. Don't rush it. If this episode meets you in a deep place, share it with a man in your life and start marking your calendar for next year's BraveCo conference, June 21–23 in Redding, California. Subscribe, rate, and review — and stay brave. Chapters: 00:00 — Jesus, I Want My Whole Heart Back 07:29 — Adam's Failure and the Birth of the Fig Leaf 14:58 — Masculinity Is Strength on Behalf of Others 22:27 — Love, Validation, and the Father's Voice 29:56 — The Police Station and the Vow That Shaped a Life 37:25 — Raising Boys and the Bestowal of Manhood 44:54 — Naming Your Wound and What You Believe 52:23 — A River Runs Through It and the Lost Father 59:52 — Jesus Asks, "Where Do You Need Me?" 1:07:21 — Blessing the Younger Boy Inside You CONNECT WITH BRAVECO Join Our Free Community for Men (ladies, sign up your man): https://www.braveco.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/braveco.men Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/braveco.men/ Shop: https://shop.braveco.org/ ABOUT BRAVECO: We live in a time where men are hunting for the truth and looking for the codebook to manhood. At BraveCo, we are on a mission to heal the narrative of masculinity across a generation; fighting the good fight together because every man should feel confident and capable of facing his pain, loving deeply, and leading a life that impacts the world around him.

  • May 18 · 22 min

    219: Why 5 Minutes a Day Could Shift Your Entire Family | The Lost Role Every Man Was Born to Play

    This week on the Brave Co Podcast, I'm getting personal about something that's been stirring in my heart for the last eight months — the role of a man as a watchman, a priest, and a contender in prayer. I'll be honest with you, I've never thought of myself as a prayer warrior in the same league as men like Lou Engle or Watchman Nee, but God has been pulling me into a deeper place. After a lunch with a friend who is genuinely a man of prayer, I started making small shifts — five minutes here, ten minutes there — and watching what God was doing in real time. This episode is me inviting you into that same stirring. I walk through the four roles every man is called to step into — priest, prophet, king, and warrior — and zoom in on what it means to be a priest who goes to God on behalf of his family. We look at Isaiah 62, Ezekiel 22, Psalm 106, and the story of Moses literally changing God's mind on behalf of a rebellious nation. The truth is, God isn't lacking power. He's looking for men who will take ownership, men who will stand in the breach, men who refuse to let their families, their churches, and their cities go unprotected. That's you. That's me. That's our actual role. I share a story from my childhood about falling asleep under the chairs at my dad's Friday night prayer meetings while men like Bill Johnson and Danny Silk contended in the room, and how that model is still shaping me today. I talk about the Businessmen's Revival in America and why I believe God is waking men up right now to do the same thing in this generation. If you've been passive, distracted, or unsure where to even start, this episode gives you a simple challenge — just five minutes. Start there, build the habit, and watch what shifts. Subscribe so you don't miss the next drop, and head to braveco.org for hats, gear, and more. Chapters: 00:00 — A Time When Masculinity Is Shamed 02:15 — A Lunch That Stirred Me to Pray 04:29 — Priest, Prophet, King, and Warrior 06:44 — What a Real Watchman Actually Does 08:59 — God Found No One to Stand in the Gap 11:13 — How Moses Changed God's Mind 13:28 — You Are a Royal Priesthood 15:42 — Falling Asleep Under the Prayer Chairs 17:57 — The Businessmen's Revival and Your Five Minutes 20:11 — A Prayer Over Every Man Listening CONNECT WITH BRAVECO Join Our Free Community for Men (ladies, sign up your man): https://www.braveco.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/braveco.men Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/braveco.men/ Shop: https://shop.braveco.org/ ABOUT BRAVECO: We live in a time where men are hunting for the truth and looking for the codebook to manhood. At BraveCo, we are on a mission to heal the narrative of masculinity across a generation; fighting the good fight together because every man should feel confident and capable of facing his pain, loving deeply, and leading a life that impacts the world around him.

  • May 18 · 53 min

    218: LIVE Call In Q&A: Why Your Wife's Attitude Triggers You (And the One Skill Most Men Never Learn)

    This week on the Brave Co Podcast, I'm doing my absolute favorite thing — going live with you guys and tackling the questions you don't want to ask out loud anywhere else. We covered some heavy ground, from a husband who feels triggered by his wife's silent attitude, to a stay-at-home dad of five wondering if he's hit his ceiling, to a man wrestling with whether he's truly hearing God's voice about a big move. I tried to give each guy real, practical tools — not Christianese platitudes — because that's what we men actually need to grow. A few themes kept rising to the surface as we worked through these conversations. Conflict resolution is a learned skill, not a personality trait, and most of us never had it modeled for us. The culture of your home is something you build on purpose, not something that just happens to you. And when it comes to hearing God, I'm convinced more men are paralyzed by the fear of getting it wrong than are actually missing His will — because we serve a Father who's kind, not a trickster waiting for us to mess up. I shared the exact framework I use when I'm trying to make big decisions, and how I keep moving forward without spiritualizing my own passivity. We closed with a powerful conversation with my friend Alejandro who's about to plant a church in Washington while caring for a wife who's hurting. I unpacked the three needs every woman has — to feel safe, seen, and known — and gave practical, doable steps any husband can start using this week to hit that target. If you want to lead your home well, this episode is loaded with tools. Make sure you subscribe so you don't miss next week's drop, and head over to braveco.org if you want to check out our gear and resources. Chapters: 00:00 — Welcome to the Live Q&A 05:24 — Conflict Is a Learned Skill, Not a Personality 10:47 — Invest in Your Marriage Like You Mean It 16:11 — A Stay-at-Home Dad Hits the Wall 21:34 — Optimize Before You Escape 26:57 — How Do I Actually Hear God's Voice? 32:21 — Green Lights Until God Says Stop 37:44 — Called to Plant a Church, Wife in Pain 43:08 — Stop Solving, Start Validating 48:31 — Build the Culture, Hit the Target CONNECT WITH BRAVECO Join Our Free Community for Men (ladies, sign up your man): https://www.braveco.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/braveco.men Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/braveco.men/ Shop: https://shop.braveco.org/ ABOUT BRAVECO: We live in a time where men are hunting for the truth and looking for the codebook to manhood. At BraveCo, we are on a mission to heal the narrative of masculinity across a generation; fighting the good fight together because every man should feel confident and capable of facing his pain, loving deeply, and leading a life that impacts the world around him.

  • May 4 · 34 min

    217: Why God "Tricks" Good Men Into Leadership | Richard Gordon & Jason Vallotton

    This week on the BraveCo Podcast, I sat down with one of my closest friends, Richard Gordon, for a conversation I've been wanting to have for a long time. Richard is on our executive team at Bethel Church, and over the years I've had the privilege of watching him grow from a son in our house into one of the strongest fathers I know. We dug into the journey of moving from "what can I get?" to "what can I give?" — that quiet, often invisible shift that turns boys into men and sons into fathers. We got real about marriage, parenting, and the things nobody warns you about — bedtime battles, sensory struggles with our kids, co-sleeping, and the seasons where you feel like you're failing even when you're showing up. I shared what it was like walking my daughter Edy through years of dysregulation after my mother-in-law passed, and Richard opened up about how God keeps inviting him deeper into leadership through his family first. We also talked about what I call "the noble drug" — the way work and ministry can quietly become an escape, even when it looks valiant from the outside. If you're a husband, a dad, or a leader feeling pulled in a thousand directions, this conversation is for you. My prayer is that it gives you permission to make your family your number one team, to be led by vision instead of need, and to remember that the seasons that feel the hardest are often the ones you'll look back on as the most sacred. Hit subscribe so you don't miss next week, and check out our new gear at braveco.org. Love you guys. Connect with Richard: https://richardgordon.org/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/richardgordon_/ Chapters: 00:00 — Welcome Back & Meet Richard Gordon 03:24 — From Son to Father: The Mindset That Changes Everything 06:48 — How God "Tricked" Richard Into Leadership 10:14 — Jesus as Lord AND Friend: Leading Your Kids Without Losing Connection 13:38 — Bedtime, Routines & Why Connection Regulates Everything 17:04 — Walking Through Edy's Sensory Journey & Our Hardest Season 20:28 — Co-Sleeping, Emotional Safety & Building a Bubble at Home 23:54 — Your Family Is Your #1 Team (And Why That Matters) 27:18 — Led by Vision, Not by Need: The Noble Drug of Overworking 30:44 — Your Greatest Assignment & Final Encouragement CONNECT WITH BRAVECO Join Our Free Community for Men (ladies, sign up your man): https://www.braveco.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/braveco.men Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/braveco.men/ Shop: https://shop.braveco.org/ ABOUT BRAVECO: We live in a time where men are hunting for the truth and looking for the codebook to manhood. At BraveCo, we are on a mission to heal the narrative of masculinity across a generation; fighting the good fight together because every man should feel confident and capable of facing his pain, loving deeply, and leading a life that impacts the world around him.

  • April 27 · 33 min

    216: How to Become a Better Dad Before You Damage Your Kids

    Website: https://www.dadawesome.org/ In this episode, I sit down with Jeff Zaugg, host of the Dad Awesome podcast and author of Dad Awesome, to talk about what it really takes to become an intentional, healthy, and present father. Jeff shares the story behind his new book, the lessons he has learned from years of conversations on fatherhood, and why every dad needs more than good intentions to lead his family well. We talk honestly about the moments we have missed it as dads, the anger, pain, passivity, and unprocessed wounds that can come out on our kids if we do not bring them into the light. Jeff shares a powerful story about a snowball that broke trust with his daughter, and we discuss how repentance, self-awareness, brotherhood, and humility can bring healing instead of shame. This conversation is for every dad who wants to grow, lead, and love his family with greater purpose. If fatherhood matters to you, it is worth investing in. Grab Jeff’s book at dadawesome.org and start building a plan for the kind of father you want to become. Chapters: 00:00 Welcome Back to Brave Co 03:21 The Weight of Becoming a Dad 06:42 The Snowball That Broke Trust 10:03 When Dads Lose Control 13:24 The Grenades Fathers Carry 16:45 Healing Pain From the Past 20:06 Self-Awareness and Brotherhood 23:27 Growing as Sons Before Fathers 26:48 Loved, Learner, Leader 30:09 Why Dads Need a Plan CONNECT WITH BRAVECO Join Our Free Community for Men (ladies, sign up your man): https://www.braveco.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/braveco.men Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/braveco.men/ Shop: https://shop.braveco.org/ ABOUT BRAVECO: We live in a time where men are hunting for the truth and looking for the codebook to manhood. At BraveCo, we are on a mission to heal the narrative of masculinity across a generation; fighting the good fight together because every man should feel confident and capable of facing his pain, loving deeply, and leading a life that impacts the world around him.

  • April 20 · 45 min

    215: The Brutal Truth About Leadership: You Are the Limit of Your Team

    In this episode of the BraveCo Podcast, I sit down with Martin West, a former fighter pilot turned leadership coach, to unpack what actually makes teams succeed or fail. After spending several days with him working on our own team, I realized something that challenged everything I thought I knew about leadership. It’s not just about having a great plan. It’s about what’s happening beneath the surface of your team dynamics. We dive deep into the concept of vulnerability-based trust, constructive conflict, and why most teams settle for artificial harmony instead of real progress. Martin shares powerful lessons from his time flying F-18s, where every mission was scrutinized and feedback was constant. That level of accountability shaped how he now helps leaders eliminate dysfunction, build trust, and create environments where people can actually grow. If you lead a team, a business, a family, or even want to become a better man, this conversation will challenge you. The biggest takeaway is simple but hard to accept: the leader is always the limit. But the good news is, once you become aware of it, you can start building a culture where truth, feedback, and growth become the norm—and that changes everything. Connected with Martin West: https://www.xgap.com/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/martin-west-93123a1a/ Chapters: 00:00 – Vulnerability, Creativity, and the Power of Disagreement 04:31 – From Fighter Pilot Dreams to Elite Training Reality 09:02 – The Cost of Constant Feedback and Accountability 13:33 – Leadership Lessons from High-Stakes Environments 18:04 – The Five Dysfunctions of a Team Explained 22:35 – Why Conflict Is the Key to Team Breakthrough 27:06 – The Leader Is the Limit of Every Team 31:37 – The Power of Feedback and Ego Removal 36:08 – Breaking Artificial Harmony in Teams and Relationships 40:39 – Building a Culture of Truth, Vulnerability, and Growth CONNECT WITH BRAVECO Join Our Free Community for Men (ladies, sign up your man): https://www.braveco.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/braveco.men Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/braveco.men/ Shop: https://shop.braveco.org/ ABOUT BRAVECO: We live in a time where men are hunting for the truth and looking for the codebook to manhood. At BraveCo, we are on a mission to heal the narrative of masculinity across a generation; fighting the good fight together because every man should feel confident and capable of facing his pain, loving deeply, and leading a life that impacts the world around him.

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