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The Nuance Diaries · Monday · 2 min

Statement from Molly

Welcome to The Nuance Diaries! Unfiltered alchemy from your most unhinged group chat. Consider my vulnerability a permission slip for yours. If you’re new here, maybe check this out? If you’re an old timer, perhaps this is the week you upgrade your subscription? STATEMENT FROM MOLLY, THE BIRD At the end of the day, I am just a bird. An expensive, traumatized bird who was denied the chance to go home with Kelly Clarkson. Due to recent events in my home, Brooklyn, I sought refuge, solace, and freedom in Astoria, where I enjoyed a lovely Halloween. During my adventures, I met Alexa, who has so generously agreed to take me under her metaphorical wing. She even took me to karaoke, where we sang Uninvited and 9 to 5. At least she has good taste. When we arrived at her home, I met her other comrades, Holly the Harrods Bear, Lacy the Macy’s Bear, Beverly Beaver, and Toto. Who would’ve thought that I, a rare, priceless bird, would be sharing a home with department store bears and a dog from Kansas? I’m told that Macy’s and Harrods are respected establishments, and that Toto, like me, has seen his fair share of trials. Beverly hails from the Upper East Side — she is apparently a beloved mascot for an all-girls school. I look forward to getting acclimated and enjoying the holiday season in my new home. I am unavailable for further comments, and ask that you respect my privacy while I heal from this tumultuous chapter of being thrust into the public eye and denied the chance to go home with Kelly Clarkson. For future bookings, contact my agents. Please refrain from all purchase inquiries, as I am clearly not for sale. Signed, An orphaned bird who knows her worth, and why the caged bird sings. PS Please do subscribe so that I can continue living the luxurious life I am used to, while in Alexa’s care. My $15M price tag is merely symbolic. I am priceless and unsellable, and I have certain standards I expect Alexa to meet. SUBSCRIBE HERE BUY ME / MOLLY A COFFEE This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thenuancediaries.substack.com/subscribe

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show notes

Welcome to The Nuance Diaries! Unfiltered alchemy from your most unhinged group chat. Consider my vulnerability a permission slip for yours.

If you’re new here, maybe check this out?

If you’re an old timer, perhaps this is the week you upgrade your subscription?

STATEMENT FROM MOLLY, THE BIRD

At the end of the day, I am just a bird.

An expensive, traumatized bird who was denied the chance to go home with Kelly Clarkson.

Due to recent events in my home, Brooklyn, I sought refuge, solace, and freedom in Astoria, where I enjoyed a lovely Halloween.

During my adventures, I met Alexa, who has so generously agreed to take me under her metaphorical wing. She even took me to karaoke, where we sang Uninvited and 9 to 5. At least she has good taste.

When we arrived at her home, I met her other comrades, Holly the Harrods Bear, Lacy the Macy’s Bear, Beverly Beaver, and Toto.

Who would’ve thought that I, a rare, priceless bird, would be sharing a home with department store bears and a dog from Kansas? I’m told that Macy’s and Harrods are respected establishments, and that Toto, like me, has seen his fair share of trials. Beverly hails from the Upper East Side — she is apparently a beloved mascot for an all-girls school.

I look forward to getting acclimated and enjoying the holiday season in my new home.

I am unavailable for further comments, and ask that you respect my privacy while I heal from this tumultuous chapter of being thrust into the public eye and denied the chance to go home with Kelly Clarkson.

For future bookings, contact my agents.

Please refrain from all purchase inquiries, as I am clearly not for sale.

Signed,

An orphaned bird who knows her worth, and why the caged bird sings.

PS

Please do subscribe so that I can continue living the luxurious life I am used to, while in Alexa’s care. My $15M price tag is merely symbolic. I am priceless and unsellable, and I have certain standards I expect Alexa to meet.

SUBSCRIBE HERE

BUY ME / MOLLY A COFFEE



This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thenuancediaries.substack.com/subscribe
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