Skip to content
Artwork for The ADHD Parenting Podcast
The ADHD Parenting Podcast · July 22 · 25 min

Competent Roles for Kids with ADHD

Hosts Ryan and Mike make the case that children with ADHD don't need fewer responsibilities — they need better-scaffolded, consistent ones. They introduce the idea of a "competent role": an ongoing, child-owned job that genuinely matters to the family, distinct from a random chore. Along the way they name the "high giving, low expectations" trap that well-meaning parents fall into, explain why learned helplessness gets weaponized to escape non-preferred tasks, and walk through the executive-function skills these roles quietly build. The episode closes with a practical playbook for creating one competent role this week, grounded in research on autonomy, competence, and relatedness. Find Mike @ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.grownowadhd.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ & on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠IG⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find Ryan @ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.adhddude.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ & on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Youtube⁠⁠⁠ {{chapters}} [00:00:00] Start [00:02:14] What a Competent Role Actually Is [00:04:09] High Giving, Low Expectations [00:11:09] The Four Parts of a Competent Role [00:14:19] How Roles Build Executive Function [00:16:50] Create One Competent Role This Week

0:00-25:46

transcript

No transcript — this publisher did not publish one.

show notes

Hosts Ryan and Mike make the case that children with ADHD don't need fewer responsibilities — they need better-scaffolded, consistent ones. They introduce the idea of a "competent role": an ongoing, child-owned job that genuinely matters to the family, distinct from a random chore. Along the way they name the "high giving, low expectations" trap that well-meaning parents fall into, explain why learned helplessness gets weaponized to escape non-preferred tasks, and walk through the executive-function skills these roles quietly build. The episode closes with a practical playbook for creating one competent role this week, grounded in research on autonomy, competence, and relatedness.


Find Mike @ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.grownowadhd.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ & on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠IG⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
Find Ryan @ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.adhddude.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ & on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Youtube⁠⁠⁠


{{chapters}}

[00:00:00] Start

[00:02:14] What a Competent Role Actually Is

[00:04:09] High Giving, Low Expectations

[00:11:09] The Four Parts of a Competent Role

[00:14:19] How Roles Build Executive Function

[00:16:50] Create One Competent Role This Week

links4