Get Over Your Avoidant Ex Immediately with THESE Steps
transcript
show notes
Heal From Heartbreak at the Root. Try the Breakup Course Free With Your 7-day Trial. Start Here: https://attachment.personaldevelopmentschool.com/dream-life?utm_source=podcast&utm_campaign=7-day-trial&utm_medium=organic&utm_content=pod-08-10-26&el=podcast
Are you struggling to move on from an Avoidant ex?
Whether it was a long-term relationship, a situationship, or a marriage, breakups can leave you feeling stuck, constantly replaying the past and wondering why you can't let go.
The good news is that healing isn't about forgetting them, it's about understanding what your subconscious mind is actually grieving.
Episode Summary
In this episode, Thais Gibson explains why breakups with Avoidant partners can feel especially painful and shares practical steps to help you move forward. She explores how the subconscious mind identifies with a partner, becomes dependent on having certain emotional needs met through the relationship, and often grieves the fantasy of what could have been just as much as the person themselves.
You'll learn why painful stories after a breakup keep you emotionally stuck, how unmet needs make it harder to let go, and why healing begins by identifying what you were truly seeking from the relationship. Thais also walks through actionable exercises that help you reconnect with your own needs, evaluate how well your former partner actually met them, and create healthier ways to meet those needs moving forward.
Most importantly, she reminds us that moving on isn't about suppressing grief; it's about rewiring the subconscious patterns that keep us attached to pain.
Key Takeaways
✔️ Your subconscious mind often identifies with your partner after emotional attachment
✔️ Breakups create grief by disrupting both identity and unmet emotional needs
✔️ Painful stories about the breakup can prolong emotional suffering
✔️ We often grieve the fantasy of a relationship as much as the reality
✔️ Identifying the needs your ex fulfilled creates clarity and accelerates healing
✔️ Learning to meet your own needs reduces emotional dependency
✔️ Comparing your relationship to your actual standards helps you move forward with confidence
Timestamps
00:00 – Moving On From Your Avoidant Ex
00:45 – The Subconscious Mind
00:45 – 1. We Start to Identify Ourselves With That Person
03:01 – 2. We Get Used to Having Our Needs Met
04:48 – 3. We Tell Painful Stories After a Breakup
06:05 – 4. We Grieve the Fantasy of the Person
07:05 – 7-Day Trial + Skyrocket Your Self-Esteem Course Promo
07:27 – Step 1: Make a List of the Needs You Think This Person Met
08:24 – Step 2: How Much Do You Feel Like Your Needs Met?
10:16 – What Can You Do to Meet the Needs You’re Hungering For?
11:16 – Make a List of the Things You Want in a Partner
11:44 – Write Down How Much the Person Showed Up to Meet Those Needs
Meet the Host
Thais Gibson is the founder of The Personal Development School and a world leader in attachment theory. With a Ph.D. and over a dozen certifications, she’s helped more than 70,000 people reprogram their subconscious and build thriving relationships.
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