The Relationship Pattern That's Costing You Real Love

Most people think they're bad at dating. They're not. They're just picking the wrong people for predictable reasons. Therapist Lori Gottlieb breaks down why smart people keep making terrible romantic choices. Turns out about 70% of us have secure attachment styles, but these folks are practically invisible on dating apps. Meanwhile, we're drawn to people who recreate childhood patterns, even when those patterns hurt. What you'll discover: • Why your brain mistakes anxiety for attraction (and how to spot the difference) • The attachment style that makes up 70% of people but gets overlooked in dating • How childhood experiences predict who you'll swipe right on as an adult • The one question that reveals if someone's actually ready for a real relationship Nina Valdez walks through the research showing people spend more time picking a car than understanding their relationship patterns. The data on this is pretty wild: folks who do personal work before dating have way higher relationship satisfaction rates. Not shocking, but the numbers are bigger than you'd think. Chapters: 00:00 Why good people go unnoticed 02:30 The attachment style lottery 05:15 Your childhood blueprint for love 08:00 Red flags vs. green flags that actually matter 10:30 The readiness question This isn't about becoming a different person to find love. It's about understanding why you keep ending up in the same situations with different faces. If you're tired of dating advice that doesn't work, hit follow. Nina drops new Brainwaves episodes every day, mixing real medical research with the kind of straight talk you'd get from a doctor who actually has time to explain things. Subscribe and never miss an episode at Brainwaves Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices